N E B U L O U S V E X Chapter 2 Consultation

Lieutenant Reed was busying himself recalibrating the calibration instruments when
Ensign Mayweather suddenly swished through the armory door. As Travis approached
him, Malcolm glanced up briefly then returned his attention to the matter at hand.

"Uh, Lieutenant?"

"Ensign," he acknowledged without looking up. "What can I do for you?"

"Well, Sir," Travis said. "It's kind of a...personal matter."

The good lieutenant tweaked one last microvalve then took a break. Since they had
entered the nebula, many things had needed calibrating - up to and including the calibrators -
but because he was rarely asked for advice of any sort, Malcolm figured he'd better make
the most of it. He gestured for Travis to follow him, and the two moved to the weapons
lockers and sat down on an empty bench.

"Now, Ensign Mayweather," Reed said. "What seems to be the matter?"

"Sir, have you- ? I mean, has there ever been someone that you, uh, really liked, but
were afraid to... uh...?"

"But were afraid to tell them how you feel?" Malcolm finished.

Travis nodded.

"More times than I can remember," he said. "I suppose there's someone...special?"

"Yes, Sir," Travis admitted shyly. "I just don't know what to do about it."

"Well, Ensign, I'm not entirely certain that I'm the most qualified to answer questions of
this sort, but I seem to remember a wise man once said, "Nothing ventured, nothing gained."

"I guess."

"And if you combine that with, 'Why put off till tomorrow what you can do today,' then
I think you have your answer."

"Aren't those just a bunch of old clichés?" Travis asked skeptically.

"I prefer to think of them as proverbs," Malcolm defended. "There's a difference between
the two."

"Such as?"

"Well, you see, a proverb is a- Uh... A proverb uses..."

"...?"

"Look, I'm not a bloody English teacher!" he scoffed. "I just know there's a difference.
These sayings wouldn't have lasted so long if they weren't essentially true."

"So a proverb is an old saying that has, like, a grain of truth to it?" asked Travis.

"Indeed."

"What's a cliché, then?"

"I think what you just said."

"Huh?"

"'A grain of truth'."

"About proverbs?"

"No, the phrase, 'grain of truth' - it's a cliché!" Malcolm huffed. "I think."

"So proverbs don't have a grain of truth?" Travis blinked.

"You're missing the gist of it. Of course they do! That's what makes them proverbs!"

"Ohhhh..." Travis nodded slowly. "So what's a cliché then?"

Just before full-blown Red, Malcolm Pink-Cheeks rolled his eyes then calmly stormed
over to the comm panel.

"Reed to Ensign Sato."

"This is Ensign Sato."

"Hoshi, do you have a good definition for cliché ?"

"Sir?"

"A cliché ," Malcolm said. "You know..."

"You mean like, 'a stitch in time saves nine' or 'why put off till tomorrow what you can- ?"

"Yes, yes, something like that."

"Let me look," she said.

After a few seconds, her voice came back over the comm. "It says that a cliché is 'a trite,
stereotyped expression that has lost originality and impact by long overuse'."

"Does it give an example?"

"'As strong as an ox'..."

"That's a cliché?"

"That's what it says."

"Look up 'proverb'."

There was a faint yet distinct sigh.

"Sure. I mean, yes, Sir."

"Sorry Hoshi."

"Oh, it's no problem," she said unconvincingly.

"It says... Ok... It says that a proverb is 'a short popular saying that expresses effectively
some commonplace truth or useful thought."

"Ah ha!" Malcolm chimed. "Now we're getting somewhere!"

"Sir?"

"So now, Hoshi, given what you just read, wouldn't you say that a cliché is simply a proverb
whose shelf life has expired?"

"I really wouldn't know, Sir," she said.

"Well, that's a good way to put it, don't you think?"

"I guess, uh, Sir? I'm late for a- I mean, I'm supposed to meet someone, and-"

"Alright, Hoshi, thanks for the help!"

"You're welcome!" she lied.

With his patented smirk, Lieutenant Reed turned swiftly back around towards Travis and
proudly proclaimed, "There you have it!"

"What's that, Sir?"

"You weren't listening??"

"I try not to eavesdrop, Sir," Travis said. "It's not polite."

"It's not eavesdropping when it concerns you!"

As it was that the ensign had no response, Malcolm calmly repeated his advice in-full then
dissected the reasonable differences between proverbs and clichés, after which, Travis stood
up and thanked him.

"I appreciate the help, Lieutenant!" he said. "I guess I'll go give it a shot!"

"Good luck, Ensign."

"Thank you, Sir!" he smiled. "And remember, 'What's good for the goose is-'"

"Is good for the gander," Malcolm finished.

Travis made a hasty and successful retreat; the suddenly-sobered Lieutenant Reed, on the
other hand, sank slowly back down on his bench.

"What's good for the goose," he mumbled aloud.

After a few more distracted minutes fumbling with his calibrations, Malcolm sighed and
returned the microspanner to his toolbox.

"Alright gander," he said to himself, after which, he left the armory and headed directly to
his quarters to get cleaned up.