Disclaimer: I was gonna write a disclaimer, until I got high ♪. I was gonna tap the keyboard, but then I got high.♪ My disclaimer's still not up and I know why!♪ Cuz I got high… Cuz I got high… Cuz I got high… lalalala ♪
Introduction:
Haitani: Yo, I'm back! Like I said in the last chapter, I'm gonna tell ya what happened between Keitaro and Yumiko.
Naru: Haitini! Haitari! What was your name again?
Haitani: It's Haitani!!! Dammit!
Naru: Whatever! Anyway, there was this phone call, there was this accident and Keitaro and Seta with someone else suddenly disappeared from the excavation site!
Haitani: And then… pissed off about the name thing
Naru: The authorities think they got washed out to sea!
Haitani: And then…
Naru: Dude, stop that! It's annoying.
Haitani: And then…
Naru: Dammit! Just help us find him!
Haitani: I don't think so… I don't want to put a self insert in this story.
Naru: Can't you at least give us a clue?
Haitani: No! Because the place where they are, is… a Secret! ^_^ Hahahaha! Now got out o' here cuz the story is gonna start soon!
Naru: mumbling damn immature bastard… act your age… no help at all… kill later…
Haitani: By the way… Act surprised when the news comes, and if you do it well… I might consider a scene with you kissing Keitaro sometime soon
Naru: Alright! On with the fic!!! skips merrily from the room
Haitani: Hey that's my line… Anyway, just for the heck o' it… On with the fic!
Chapter 3: The incident at the island!
Keitaro was beginning to stir, he rubbed his eyes and took a look around. He found Yumi a few paces away from him. Her top had been torn so much, he couldn't bear to watch her any longer and decided to cover her with a few large leaves and left in search for Seta. He didn't get far before a man with face paint jumped him from the bushes and wrestled him to the ground.
Keitaro somehow managed to throw the man and took a few steps before he turned to face the man. Keitaro facefaulted and yelled, "Please don't jump any of us again Seta-san! You almost gave me a heart attack! And why the strange clothes?" If you grabbed Yumi you would've accidentally grabbed her melons too!
Seta dusted himself off and said, "Nice throw, Keitaro-kun! You might be qualified to learn martial arts after all!"
An anger mark appeared on Keitaro's forehead as he thought to himself, You're changing the subject again…
Devil-Keitaro appeared and said, "Now that I think about it, some good may come from jumping Yumi-chan… Just as long as I… I mean you do it…"
Angel-Keitaro appeared as well, with a bandage over his left eye and his arm in a cast. "Resist the evil, Keitaro!!! Hack! Cough!" he screamed… choked… as he pointed his finger… bandage… at Devil-Keitaro.
"I've had enough of you! Devil spear, come!" Devil Keitaro screamed as he raised his hands to receive the devil spear, miniaturized to the size of a chopstick.
"Oh look! Azusagawa Tsukino is making out with Kawachi! Have you two no shame!" Angel-Keitaro exclaimed as he pointed behind Devil-Keitaro with his good hand.
"Whoa! Where?" Devil-Keitaro exclaimed as he got the instant mental image.
"Idiot! You fell for it so easily! Die you pervert!" Angel-Keitaro screamed as he fired the gun at Devil-Keitaro.
"Safe!" Keitaro exclaimed, "Thanks angel dude!"
"All in a day's work. Ma'am." Angel-Keitaro replied before he tripped and accidentally impaled himself on the Devil Spear. Then both of them disappeared in a puff of smoke
Back in the real world Seta pulled a net from the bushes and said, "By the way, look what I found Keitaro! A net full of watermelons!"
Watermelons? For some reason I just remembered somebody I know… "Then what about the face paint… n' stuff…?" Keitaro asked
"Oh, I was trying to see if I could blend in with the natives! Once I find the natives…" Seta replied, "But it seems that we're the only ones on this island! This might even be a new island, if it is… I think it should be called 'The island of the Noriyasu' or what about 'Seta island'? What do you think Keitaro?" Seta asked
"What about 'Urashima'" Keitaro replied
(note: As I remember Urashima means island, I'm not too sure but what the hell."
"We'll have think it over… but for now we have to find some water! If only Haruka-san was here…" Seta trailed off
"What about Haruka obaa-san?" Keitaro asked
"Nothing, nothing… It was just a strange thought." Seta replied as he faced away from Keitaro
Keitaro sweatdropped and asked "Anyway, a search party should be here anytime now, right?"
"If this is a new island then they wouldn't think of searching here… we wouldn't even be on the map…" Seta trailed off. The serious expression faded and he exclaimed, "Isn't this great, let's go digging as soon as Yumi wakes up! I bet there are artifacts here from the ocean floor! Hahahaha! This'll teach them not to take Noriyasu Seta lightly!!!"
"Uhh… right…"
Meanwhile, back at Hinata-sou a phone was ringing. Suu heard it, and picked it up. "Halo! Suu-chan here! Chomp! Haw fwan aye fwelp yoo?" Suu happily said into the mouthpiece, apparently she was eating a banana at the same time
"Suu how many times do I have to tell you, don't answer the phone!" Naru screamed as she snatched the phone from Suu which happily bounced off.
"Sorry about that, can I help you?" Naru asked
"Hello, I'm a co-worker of Keitaro, there was an accident two days ago…" a seemingly nervous male voice replied, "Keitaro, the professor and another person, were excavating in a ditch when suddenly one of the workers found a natural hot spring, they didn't get away in time and were washed out to sea. The coast guard has been searching for days, but they've had no luck… I'm sorry you had to know this… Anyway, it'll be on the news tonight. Goodbye" and the person on the other line hung up.
Having no other option, she lowered the receiver and leaned against the wall. She slowly slid down and she held her face in her hands and wept. It… It's not fair! Naru thought angrily to herself I talked to everyone, we forgave each other, and we even decided to throw a party for Keitaro when he comes back… Then this happens… Why! Why! Why!
"Why! Why! Why!" Keitaro yelled at Yumiko as he picked up the pieces of his broken tent. "Why did this have to happen now?"
"Ehehehehe… I was just curious about what those spikes were for… Sorry Keitaro." Yumiko apologized
"Then what are we going to do now? We need to find a place to stay! I think I saw a wolf roaming around a while ago! And it looks like it's going to rain" Keitaro panicked
"There might be a cave around here, for all we know Seta might be in one right now, we haven't seen him for hours. I say we look around" Yumiko suggested
"What have we got to lose…? But no more carelessness!" Keitaro replied
Yumiko felt a water droplet fall on her nose and she exclaimed, "We better hurry!"
A few minutes later that small water droplet had turned into a full blown hurricane. Keitaro and Yumiko had seen smoke before the fain fell and they were making their way towards it. Leaves and Twigs slapped their faces and the rain pounded on their backs. A cave was in their field of vision when suddenly they fell into a deep ditch that was hidden by the undergrowth.
Keitaro got up and tried to climb the dirt wall, the dirt crumbled in his hands and he realized that they were trapped. Noticing that Yumiko had not yet stood up, he knelt down and asked her, "Hey, are you alright?"
She was crying, and her face was contorted in pain. She looked up at him and pointed to her ankle. "My… ankle… I think I twisted it, bad…"
Looking around Keitaro saw a cave behind her, he carried her in his arms to the cave and lowered her gently so she could lean against the wall. He took off his shirt and wrapped it around her ankle to make sure she wouldn't move it unnecessarily. He looked at her and said, "This is all I can do for now, I left the first aid kit with Seta after we found it on the beach earlier."
"Thanks, Keitaro… Hey, could you come over here I have something to give you." She told him.
He moved towards her and asked, "What is it?"
She took off her gold heart-shaped pendant and handed it to Keitaro, "Here, I was going to give it to you as a remembrance of me when the expedition ended, but I found out that you were trying for Toudai too. So I guess I'll just it to you now. Look at the picture inside" She told him with a smile on her face.
"Hey this is the picture of you, me and Seta that we took three weeks ago! This is the best! Thanks Yumi!"
She leaned over to kiss him but suddenly she saw a familiar face behind Keitaro and exclaimed, "Seta-san!"
"Umm… did I interrupt something?" Seta asked innocently
"No! You didn't interrupt anything at all!" Yumiko pouted
"By the way, do you have the first aid kit? Yumi twisted her ankle and the last time I saw it, it was swelling" Keitaro asked Seta
"Well… I sort of lost it…" Seta answered
"What! Why?" Keitaro exclaimed
Seta whispered something in Keitaro's ear and Keitaro gasped, "You don't mean… Damn, that sucks…"
"Hey, there's someone up there…" Yumiko told them as she pointed upwards
A watermelon hit Keitaro and bounced off his head to hit Seta as well. After Keitaro regained his bearings he saw a blurry figure and he asked, "Mutsumi-san?"
"Oh, Natsumi-chan how are you? It's been a while, hasn't it?" Seta suddenly asked the figure
"Ara, Seta-san wait there I'll get help." Natsumi said before she tripped over a second watermelon and disappeared in the rain.
Keitaro and Yumiko sweatdropped and asked Seta, "Is she really going to be alright?"
"Of course! Everybody knows that tripping over a watermelon is a sign of good luck!" Seta happily replied seconds before a ladder fell beside him. "You see!"
"Yumi, I'll carry you up the ladder, hold on tight." Keitaro told her as he motioned for her to jump on his back. Seta helped her to get on Keitaro and he climbed the ladder, with great difficulty. "Yu… Yumi… you really need to go on a diet… You're really heavy." he told her when they reached the top
"Hey, I'm not that heavy!" Yumiko replied indignantly
"Ara, are you two a couple?" Natsumi suddenly asked
Keitaro almost fell in the hole again when he backed away, and stuttered, "Well… um… we're not… not yet…"
"What Keitaro was trying to say was…" Yumiko began
Natsumi shook her head and said, "No need, I can speak loser"
An imaginary boulder fell on Keitaro and he said, "So… so blunt…"
Author's Notes: Running with the devil
Seeing that the search for a new manager was inconclusive Grandma Hina decided to end the search once and for all. She went to his apartment and walked in.
"Oh Keitaro, my love, here's a token of my undying love… Chu! note: chu: sound of a kiss Nyahahaha!" Haitani mocked Keitaro as he acted out Yumiko's earlier actions. He was joined in his laughter by Reiko Yamazaki, his former assistant.
"Alright! Break it up! I have to talk to Haitani in private! Now everyone get out!" Grandma Hina commanded, feeling her aura they all backed away and silently left the room.
"What is it?" Haitani asked, not feeling the bloodthirstiness of the aura
"I need you to bring Keitaro back… I… I can't take it anymore!!! They're monsters! Slave drivers! Not a moment of peace! Please Haitani, I beg you!!!" Grandma Hina screamed
What's in it for me?" Haitani asked, unfazed
"I'll give you 100,000 yen per resident! Please!!!" Grandma Hina begged
"It seems fair, I needed the money anyway, I've had my eye on this one sword." Haitani replied
"Thank God!!! I really need to get away from here!"
"And my money?" Haitani asked
"Haruka will take care of that." She replied, "By the way… what happened to Seta?"
"He twisted his Johnson in an unnatural manner and whisper, whisper" Haitani replied
"Oh my GOD!!! That's just disturbing!" She exclaimed
The real notes:
Ahem! Ahem! This chapter was supposed to be longer. But I've put a limit on how long one chapter can be so I decided to move the reason why Keitaro and Yumiko dig each other, as well as the part where the girls watch the news to the next chapter. The reason I put a limit is because I tend to exhaust all of my ideas in one chapter (this chapter is low quality too since I was running low in compatible ideas ^_^; I was uninspired as well) so to prevent this, I have placed the limit at 7 pages for this fic.
I've also changed this from a Drama/Angst to a Drama cuz I'm not really an angsty person… ^_^; I can't write angst, too much angst pisses me off.
Also, the wolf that Keitaro mentioned on seeing was actually Mutsumi's pet. I think those dogs look just like cute little wolves. And that thing about Keitaro throwing Seta is just a theory of mine on why Seta decided to teach Keitaro martial arts (after all Keitaro probably knows the basic Urashima techniques anyway) And Azusagawa Tsukino and Kawachi are characters in Yakitate Japan!, a great manga that I recommend that you buy, Support the manga, Buy a copy is just stuck in my head you can just download it if you want.
And the Devil-Keitaro/Angel-Keitaro thing… I was inspired… Everybody has a conscience, why not make them part of a character? (Inspired by the inner Sakura thing in Naruto)
For P-man, Hamdo, Carl, Josephine and Reiko. I was going to send the complete fics in the CDs I was sending to you guys but for now you just have to wait, like the rest of the world to read a Haitani original! Nyahahaha! See ya around everyone! Later!