The four arrived at the party in the hotel Sakura was given orders to. Sakura looked around for people she was familiar with and saw about only 5 of them. 'I guess some people brought more than 3 guests…' she reasoned. Holding Syaoran's hand, they made their way to a free table. Once they were able to sit down, Eriol sighed happily and Tomoyo quickly stared at the large buffet in one side of the hotel.
"WOW!!" She yelled through the loud noise. "Look at the food!!" She was practically drooling at the sight of the four tables filled with the aromatic cuisines.
Eriol laughed, "I don't think we can eat yet, honey," he looked back at Sakura. "Can we?"
She shrugged. "I'm not sure, I can't even find my boss!"
"Why are you looking for her??" Syaoran asked, annoyed at the mention of Hikaru. "It's bad enough we're in this friggin' party. Now we have to actually talk to Niijimata??"
Sakura replied with a guiltily look. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you, but you wouldn't have come if I told you," she said, "and besides nothing big is going to happen!" 'Hopefully…'
He glanced at Sakura's pleading eyes for a few minutes and finally agreed. "Fine, go look for her. But don't get lost," he replied, staring straight into her eyes, making sure she got the message.
"Ok, I promise," Sakura giggled and pecked Syaoran on the lips. "Be back in a few minutes."
"No. Be back in a second," he caught her lips again and kissed her longer than 3 seconds.
She pulled away slowly, nodding. "I promise!" Sakura then stood up and made her way out of the huge throng of dancing people.
Syaoran stared at the people dancing and back at the couple. They were only the ones sitting down and everyone else having a great time, dancing around. Syaoran knew Tomoyo wouldn't be able to dance unless it was a slow dance. For sure Eriol would dance with Tomoyo at that, and Syaoran knew he was going to dance with Sakura on those ones. But during these fast-paced dances, there really wasn't anything they could do. Looking glum, he took a sip of the already-prepared red wine and laid back on his chair.
"Sit up straight, boy!" Tomoyo commanded. "You're a knight, not a hobo!"
That got a laugh out of Eriol. Syaoran glared. "But why do I have to? I'm not exactly a real knight, Tomoyo."
"But this is a Halloween party and you have to act what you wear!" She said enthusiastically. "See I'm a princess and can you see my posture? I could be perfect as a princess!" Her amethyst eyes glittered. Syaoran nodded aimlessly, his eyes traveling around, searching for Sakura. It had already been 3 minutes and she wasn't back yet!
A hand paused at his shoulder. Surprised at the touch, he looked up in hopes of it being Sakura, but met the one he least wanted to see. Groaning inwardly, he stood up and pushed her hand away from his, challenging her stare. Eriol tensed in his seat at the sight of her, yet Tomoyo wasn't affected by any of this. She was completely unaware of what was happening.
"Let's talk somewhere else," he said in a lowered voice.
She nodded. "Follow me."
Syaoran turned back to his friends. "When Sakura comes back, don't tell her anything. Just say that I went to the washroom."
Eriol nodded, still glaring at Hikaru's back. When Syaoran turned, Eriol grabbed his hand, turning him around once more. "Be careful, man." Eriol replied.
Syaoran gave a short smirk at Eriol. "Thanks, but I will be."
As soon as the two were in a room alone, Hikaru sat on a seat, staring up at Syaoran with desire, frustration, confusion, and a lot more emotions. Syaoran knew what he was feeling and he wanted to finish their conversation. Although he didn't have feelings for her, he knew deep inside him that he did before, and…maybe it was because of that that he wanted to say goodbye to her. Properly.
"So what do you want to tell me?" He asked, crossing his arms.
Hikaru sighed wistfully. "Why did you say goodbye after you kissed me?" She asked abruptly.
"I never meant to stay, Hikaru."
"Then why did you kiss me?? Why couldn't you have just said goodbye coldly like always, and not leave me with the impression that you had feelings for me??" Her anger dissipated and desperation overflowed in her heart.
That got him started. "I don't know, all right? I was confused!" He stared out the window. "How the hell was I supposed to know my feelings?? I never felt anything like that before, and I didn't know how to deal with it! Look, I did have feelings for you, but that was it. Now…I've grown up and I know more about emotions than I did when I met you."
"Are you saying that if you knew…emotions as well as you do now…that we would've had a chance together??" Her voice broke at the end of the question.
"Who knows?" He muttered, looking directly at her. "The thing is, Hikaru, it's the past. It's been at least 8 years ever since we last saw each other, and yet you still have feelings for me. That's not…love…if the other person doesn't love you back." Syaoran was desperately wanted her to understand.
"How would you know?" Her sobs lessened and finally stopped. Her voice became harsh and cold. "How would you know how I felt?? Yes, I did wait 8 long, goddamn years for you, and yes I do sound like a bitch right now, but you don't know the pain I'm going through just looking at you and Sakura!! She hasn't known you that long and yet she holds your heart!! I've known you for 8 years and what do I get?? A mere slap on the face??" Her tears flowed down her cheeks and she paid no heed to it. "I know love is painful, but I never thought it would be this painful! I regret falling in love with you, but I have! I have, and I can't just stop! It's not that easy!!"
He suddenly felt guilt wash over him. "Hikaru…" He started, but no words followed.
She broke down and she cried heavily, every sob bit at him. "I know you and Sakura think I'm the devil…hell I think your friends think that too. But you guys don't know my side of this story." Syaoran offered her a box of tissues he found on one table. She grabbed it and took some, dabbing it at her eyes. "I am stupid for still going after you, but…no man's ever taken my heart like you have mine. And I know that we barely know each other…but there's just this thing about you that makes me feel…"
He knelt down in front of her, lifting her chin up with his hand. "That's the problem. You're not letting yourself open to other guys because you're stuck with the idea of me the only person making you feel something. No one can feel something for just one person. I felt something for you. But you're not the one for me," he said, looking into her eyes, "and I feel something for Sakura. I…I know she's the one for me, but…who really knows?"
Hikaru hiccupped, her eyes focusing on Syaoran's. "W-what are you saying?"
"I'm not exactly the person to go to for love advice, but from my experience, I think you just have to stop comparing other guys to me. I'm not yours…I was never yours to begin with. To move on, you just got to focus on your feelings and not mine, because…" he paused to find the right words. "Hikaru, I don't mean to make this sound harsh or cold, but I'll never…I'll never go back to you. I've got Sakura now. She's the one for me…and I'm so sure of it. You've got to move on and think of your own heart, because I'll never be yours to take."
Her eyes trembled and tears clouded in them once again. "I know!" She cried. "I know this, ok?? I've seen it! But I've been so stuck on the idea of you and me being together that I dismissed yours and Sakura's feelings all together…and I'm ashamed…so ashamed."
Syaoran felt bad for her, and nothing else. He opened his arms for her and embraced her, letting her cry on his shoulder. This was the only thing he could do for Hikaru, and he was going to make sure it was the last thing he would do. After minutes of sobs and cries, she finally stopped and pulled away herself. Sitting back down on the seat, she smiled weakly at him, blinking away the remainder of her sadness.
"I'm sorry," she whispered in a raspy voice.
He gave a nod, and stood up. "That threat you made me…are you still going to do it?" He asked automatically.
Hikaru shook her head rapidly. "I promise, I won't hurt Sakura."
"Good." He sighed and looked out the blinds of the room. "So…what happens now?"
"I don't know, really." She stood up as well and straightened her clothes. "I guess…I guess I'll just quit this job. I've always got that other job back in Hong Kong," she smiled wanly.
"Yeah…"
"And thank you for…giving me a chance to tell you my side. I'm glad we talked this out."
He gave a small smile.
Hikaru clasped her hands together. "And tell Sakura sorry. I never meant to hurt her. I just wanted to know…many things. I've been cold, and I'm really sorry."
"Stop apologizing," Syaoran replied. "I don't like it when people apologize a million times. I get what you're trying to say," he walked over to Hikaru. "So you're all right?"
She looked up at him. "I…I'll be fine…I don't know when…but I think I'll be fine."
"Ok."
They stared at each other for a minute. "Goodbye Hikaru." Syaoran said in a lowered voice. Inside, he felt saddened at the words.
She took a deep breath and wiped away the rest of the tears. "Goodbye Syaoran." A moment passed, and she gave him a smile before leaving the room.
Syaoran stared after her, his hands thrust into his pockets, the memory of her smile imprinted in his mind. 'At least she wasn't crying like before,' he then felt his heart lose the sadness.
--
Syaoran entered the ballroom and there she was, shining with her angelic features. She was laughing cheerfully, her eyes dancing in pure happiness. Syaoran's heart sped up once again, and he more than willingly opened his whole body to it. Then she turned her head, staring straight at him with surprise. Her eyes warmed, her cheeks turned bright pink, and a huge smile appeared on her face. He walked slowly, and she couldn't stand it. Sakura stood up from her seat and walked quickly to him, a glorious feeling covering her whole body. Just the sight of him made her feel completely whole.
They met in the middle of the dance floor. "Would you like to dance, my love?" Syaoran whispered in a deep voice.
Her heart jumped at the romantic nickname. My love… "It would be my pleasure."
The music suddenly became slow, and everyone turned romantic. Syaoran wrapped his arms around her waist and tugged her very close, leaving no space between them. Sakura snaked her arms around his neck, looking up at him with huge, emerald eyes. "Where'd you go?" She whispered, a smile still on her face.
"Does it matter?" He traced her cheek with one hand.
"Actually…no." Sakura admitted. "You're here now, and that's all that matters."
He nodded in approval and pulled her even close. She rested her head on his shoulder as he put his chin on the top of her head. They swayed to the music contentedly, in each other's arms. Moments went by.
"Hikaru says sorry." Syaoran whispered in her ear.
She looked up at him slowly. "She did?" Her hold on Syaoran was still tight, yet comfortable.
"She and I talked. She's finally let go of me." He held her cheek once again. "I made her understand that you're the only one for me. She finally got it…and I think she's resigning tonight."
Sakura's eyes lit slightly. "Is she okay?"
Syaoran chuckled. "In spite of the pain she put you through, you've still got the heart to feel sympathy for her."
Sakura reddened. Syaoran kissed her lips softly and tenderly, not wanting to let go.
Pulling away, Syaoran answered her. "But yeah, she said she'll be ok." He leaned down. "Now…let's focus on us."
"What about us?" Sakura grinned teasingly.
"Do you love me and me only?" Syaoran asked, just as good-humoredly.
"I promise to love you and you only until the day I die." Sakura nodded. "Or if we break up."
That got a real laugh out of Syaoran. "All right. Then I promise to love you and you only until the day I die."
"Or?" Sakura looked up at him, still resting her head on his shoulder.
"There's no or." He whispered in her ear.
"What about if we break up?" She whispered back in his ear.
"I'll still love you." Syaoran answered.
That was all she needed to hear.