Disclaimers and summary on first chapter
Notes: You m/r pervs (like me) will love this. The truth about this chapter is that I honestly had writer's block. I had no idea where to go from the last chapter to this one. It seems fairly obvious of course, but I just didn't know for sure if that was what I wanted right here and now. Well it's here now so enjoy what it is. You might recognize the opening scene that was described by Roger in a previous chapter. Thanks for reading/reviewing.
Chapter 28 -Can I Keep Going?-
+Mark's POV+
I sit on Maureen's couch, recording her dancing. Roger suggested I spend some time with her for a while, but I ended up begging him to come anyway. He's to my left, playing his guitar. I point the camera over at Roger, focusing on him and zooming in on his face as he watches his fingers on the strings. He looks up and grins at me. I smile back, then turn the camera back on Maureen before she notices that I'm not paying attention to her.
I think about Roger, though I'm filming her. I haven't allowed the thought of 'love' to come into my head since the first time. Not because I deny what I feel for him on any level, but because I honestly just don't know if it's possible. I've only known him a few months after all.
Keeping the camera fixed on Maureen, I look over at him again. He's watching her, laughing as she almost trips. She glares at him, but she's smiling. I watch the way his eyes almost close when he laughs, the curve of his lips as he smiles. I wish Maureen wasn't here, because at the moment all I want to do is kiss him and have him rest his head on my shoulder. I want to touch him again, lay my hands on his chest, or have his arms around me. I want to have my fingers in his hair again, share his breath when he refuses to pull away after we kiss. I just want to be alone with him, with no worry about if Maureen or anyone else for that matter will catch me staring at him. Reluctantly, I look away.
The next time I chance a glance at him, my eyes meet his and he smiles, but I know that smile. I've just caught him staring as I had been before. Pleased that I'm not the only one having trouble being entertained by Maureen I grin back and mouth 'I want to leave'. He nods and looks back at his guitar. Playing one final chord, he stops and claps for Maureen. She bows and blows me a kiss. I roll my eyes and shake my head, but smile at her anyway.
"Mo, we're gonna go. I'll see you Monday, ok?"
She crosses her arms and pouts.
"But Marky. . ."
I stand up and pull on Roger's arm before she can protest anymore. I'll start feeling guilty and we'll be here all night. He follows me, waving awkwardly at Maureen as we leave. I try to forget I'm ditching my oldest friend for my new boyfriend. I cringe thinking that. I'm still not used to calling him that.
"Where are we going?" He asks me, as we walk to his car.
I shrug. "Anywhere we can be alone."
I blush, realizing how perverted that could sound. Then recognize that my thoughts aren't really all that pure to begin with. He comes closer to me and I elbow him gently. He looks over at me confused. I shake my head at him and motion back to Maureen's house where I know she's standing in the doorway watching us leave. He bites his lip and looks away, I can see his brow furrowed in thought.
In the car I sit next to the window with my seat belt on, for once not directly beside him. I can see this bothers him, but he doesn't say anything. He parks outside his house and gets out, not waiting for me to follow him. I quickly undo my belt and hurry to catch up to him.
"Wait, Roger!"
He stops and waits for me. He won't look at me when I try to see his face.
"Roger, look, whatever I did. . ."
His head snaps up and he looks me directly in the eyes. I take a step backwards. I don't like to look in his eyes when he's angry or upset. They become so piercingly fierce and intimidating.
"What don't you do, Mark?" He starts to walk again, then turns back and comes up close in my face. "What are you afraid of?" He practically shouts.
"Roger, please. . ." I say, trying to quiet him.
"What? Is someone going to hear me? Someone might know that we're together? I might be able to touch you in public? I might be able to hold your hand, or kiss you or even walk close together?" He pushes on my shoulders and I fall backwards and land heavily. "Well, good! Cause I'm sick of having to keep it all a secret!"
I wince, and try to stand up. I look up at him and see his whole face soften. Immediately he kneels beside me and helps me up. Once I'm standing he pulls me into a tight embrace.
"I'm sorry, Mark. I really am. I just don't understand. Help me." He pulls back, though he's still holding onto me, and waits for me to answer him.
"I don't know, Roger. I can't handle it, I really can't. It's not forever, I promise. Just let me, you know, get used to it first. And let's be sure."
He shakes his head, smiling. With one hand he tilts my chin up. "Oh, I'm sure." He kisses me gently and I allow it for his sake, though we're still standing out on his sidewalk. It's dark anyway. He takes my hand and leads me into the house.
"Is your mom home?"
He shakes his head. "She's started doing night shifts a couple times a week, so she won't be home till tomorrow morning." He grins. "Want to stay the night?"
"I had already planned on it." Pretty confident we'd be spending the whole night out I had told my parents another lame Maureen-related lie. Although it wasn't entirely a lie, I had been there earlier.
He kisses my temple as he pushes me gently toward the stairs. I turn around and pull him up with me, pressing my lips to his. He laughs against my lips and pulls away. Smiling deviously he grabs my sides and picks me up, easily throwing me over his shoulder. I beat on his back, but he just laughs and carries me that way up the stairs.
In his room he throws me on the bed and lays beside me, drawing me to him. I move easily into his arms, pulling him on top of me. He kisses me ardently, his hands on my body, my chest, my waist, my arms. I feel them then, at the bottom of my shirt and he pulls back, his eyes finding mine.
"Is this ok?" He asks me, breathlessly. I nod, and he carefully tugs my shirt over my head. I lay back again, and he kisses my chest, running his hands over my sides. I hear myself moan and I grip his shoulder tightly, needing something to cling to. I close my eyes as he kisses my neck, letting his tongue trail along my collarbone. His hands move farther down my body and again he pulls back.
"Can I keep going?" He asks me. I hesitate for only a moment before nodding and whispering a choked 'yes'.
He reaches down and pulls my shoes off, then places his hands at the fastening of my pants. I watch him undo them and start to take them off. I feel exposed, vulnerable, but when he wraps his arms around me and kisses me deeply, I forget it and succumb to him. Anything he wants, at this point he could have.
He starts to kiss my neck again, then my chest. I lay still on the bed, apprehensive, yet not about to stop him. He looks up at me a final time for approval before his hands find my briefs. I close my eyes when I feel his hand and gasp when I feel his mouth. Although I don't want to imagine him having done this before, I don't see how he couldn't have. You can't just know how to do what he's doing with his tongue. Then again, I know what he can do with his tongue while he's kissing me. I don't know how long I'm going to be able to hold out. It certainly isn't going to be very long, I'm barely holding on now. He lays his other hand on my thigh and I moan when he intensifies his actions. Barely a minute later I'm clinging to the sheets.
"Roger. . . I'm. . ."
I can't finish before it happens. He doesn't move away and when I open my eyes I watch his face for a reaction. He pulls the blanket out from under us and lays it over me, then himself, reaching to remove his shoes. He wraps his arms around my waist and presses his front to my back, kissing the back of my neck gently. I shift in his embrace until I'm completely comfortable.
"Roger?"
He makes a noise to show he's heard me.
"Don't you. . ."
"You don't have to do anything you don't want to, Mark." He says softly.
"Maybe I want to." I say, offended.
"Whatever you want, Mark." He tells me.
I turn around in his arms so I'm facing him. I reach for his shirt first and like he did for me, pull it off. His upper body is formed well, toned and hard. I like his arms most of all, the arms that have held me countless times. Always so comforting and strong, I love feeling them, being able to see all of them. When his pants are gone, and his boxers with them, I cautiously reach for him, comforted by his hand on my arm.
"Roger?"
"Hm."
"What does it taste like?"
He chuckles softly. "It's not horrible. Mark, you really don't. . ."
"I want to." I tell him stubbornly. If he can do it, so can I. I move the blankets off of us and hesitantly move down and close my mouth over him. He moans softly, and the idea of pleasuring him gives me reassurance and confidence. He rubs my back gently, telling me what to do, how I'm doing. Although at first it's intimidating since it makes me feel like I don't know what the hell I'm doing, which is true, I find it helpful and start to listen to him and am rewarded with the increased pressure of his hand on my back and the rising urgency in his voice.
"Marky, you don't have to. . ." He tries to say before he releases, but I ignore him. If he can do it, I can. It's really not all bad. I'm not going to beg for a glassful everyday, but it's tolerable. He pulls the blankets back up and I lay against his chest, his arms around me. He kisses my forehead and then settles back into the pillow.
"Mark?"
"Hm?"
He pauses, which I find unusual for him. It takes him a moment before he continues. "What would you say if I said I think I might love you?"
Despite my initial surprise I smile against his chest. "I'd say I love you too."
+++
Notes Continued: Oh sap sap sap! And smut smut smut come to think about it. I'm such a perv, making innocent little marky and rog-rog do dirty things together. I guess you can't help the way your brain works. Mine just happens to be a wee bit pervy. I don't really believe many of you will complain though. Thanks for reading/reviewing! I'll try to update a lot this week cause I'm leaving on vacation Friday and won't be back for a week or so. Florida. Boo-yah. Mickey here I come. But until then I hope you've enjoyed!
Notes: You m/r pervs (like me) will love this. The truth about this chapter is that I honestly had writer's block. I had no idea where to go from the last chapter to this one. It seems fairly obvious of course, but I just didn't know for sure if that was what I wanted right here and now. Well it's here now so enjoy what it is. You might recognize the opening scene that was described by Roger in a previous chapter. Thanks for reading/reviewing.
Chapter 28 -Can I Keep Going?-
+Mark's POV+
I sit on Maureen's couch, recording her dancing. Roger suggested I spend some time with her for a while, but I ended up begging him to come anyway. He's to my left, playing his guitar. I point the camera over at Roger, focusing on him and zooming in on his face as he watches his fingers on the strings. He looks up and grins at me. I smile back, then turn the camera back on Maureen before she notices that I'm not paying attention to her.
I think about Roger, though I'm filming her. I haven't allowed the thought of 'love' to come into my head since the first time. Not because I deny what I feel for him on any level, but because I honestly just don't know if it's possible. I've only known him a few months after all.
Keeping the camera fixed on Maureen, I look over at him again. He's watching her, laughing as she almost trips. She glares at him, but she's smiling. I watch the way his eyes almost close when he laughs, the curve of his lips as he smiles. I wish Maureen wasn't here, because at the moment all I want to do is kiss him and have him rest his head on my shoulder. I want to touch him again, lay my hands on his chest, or have his arms around me. I want to have my fingers in his hair again, share his breath when he refuses to pull away after we kiss. I just want to be alone with him, with no worry about if Maureen or anyone else for that matter will catch me staring at him. Reluctantly, I look away.
The next time I chance a glance at him, my eyes meet his and he smiles, but I know that smile. I've just caught him staring as I had been before. Pleased that I'm not the only one having trouble being entertained by Maureen I grin back and mouth 'I want to leave'. He nods and looks back at his guitar. Playing one final chord, he stops and claps for Maureen. She bows and blows me a kiss. I roll my eyes and shake my head, but smile at her anyway.
"Mo, we're gonna go. I'll see you Monday, ok?"
She crosses her arms and pouts.
"But Marky. . ."
I stand up and pull on Roger's arm before she can protest anymore. I'll start feeling guilty and we'll be here all night. He follows me, waving awkwardly at Maureen as we leave. I try to forget I'm ditching my oldest friend for my new boyfriend. I cringe thinking that. I'm still not used to calling him that.
"Where are we going?" He asks me, as we walk to his car.
I shrug. "Anywhere we can be alone."
I blush, realizing how perverted that could sound. Then recognize that my thoughts aren't really all that pure to begin with. He comes closer to me and I elbow him gently. He looks over at me confused. I shake my head at him and motion back to Maureen's house where I know she's standing in the doorway watching us leave. He bites his lip and looks away, I can see his brow furrowed in thought.
In the car I sit next to the window with my seat belt on, for once not directly beside him. I can see this bothers him, but he doesn't say anything. He parks outside his house and gets out, not waiting for me to follow him. I quickly undo my belt and hurry to catch up to him.
"Wait, Roger!"
He stops and waits for me. He won't look at me when I try to see his face.
"Roger, look, whatever I did. . ."
His head snaps up and he looks me directly in the eyes. I take a step backwards. I don't like to look in his eyes when he's angry or upset. They become so piercingly fierce and intimidating.
"What don't you do, Mark?" He starts to walk again, then turns back and comes up close in my face. "What are you afraid of?" He practically shouts.
"Roger, please. . ." I say, trying to quiet him.
"What? Is someone going to hear me? Someone might know that we're together? I might be able to touch you in public? I might be able to hold your hand, or kiss you or even walk close together?" He pushes on my shoulders and I fall backwards and land heavily. "Well, good! Cause I'm sick of having to keep it all a secret!"
I wince, and try to stand up. I look up at him and see his whole face soften. Immediately he kneels beside me and helps me up. Once I'm standing he pulls me into a tight embrace.
"I'm sorry, Mark. I really am. I just don't understand. Help me." He pulls back, though he's still holding onto me, and waits for me to answer him.
"I don't know, Roger. I can't handle it, I really can't. It's not forever, I promise. Just let me, you know, get used to it first. And let's be sure."
He shakes his head, smiling. With one hand he tilts my chin up. "Oh, I'm sure." He kisses me gently and I allow it for his sake, though we're still standing out on his sidewalk. It's dark anyway. He takes my hand and leads me into the house.
"Is your mom home?"
He shakes his head. "She's started doing night shifts a couple times a week, so she won't be home till tomorrow morning." He grins. "Want to stay the night?"
"I had already planned on it." Pretty confident we'd be spending the whole night out I had told my parents another lame Maureen-related lie. Although it wasn't entirely a lie, I had been there earlier.
He kisses my temple as he pushes me gently toward the stairs. I turn around and pull him up with me, pressing my lips to his. He laughs against my lips and pulls away. Smiling deviously he grabs my sides and picks me up, easily throwing me over his shoulder. I beat on his back, but he just laughs and carries me that way up the stairs.
In his room he throws me on the bed and lays beside me, drawing me to him. I move easily into his arms, pulling him on top of me. He kisses me ardently, his hands on my body, my chest, my waist, my arms. I feel them then, at the bottom of my shirt and he pulls back, his eyes finding mine.
"Is this ok?" He asks me, breathlessly. I nod, and he carefully tugs my shirt over my head. I lay back again, and he kisses my chest, running his hands over my sides. I hear myself moan and I grip his shoulder tightly, needing something to cling to. I close my eyes as he kisses my neck, letting his tongue trail along my collarbone. His hands move farther down my body and again he pulls back.
"Can I keep going?" He asks me. I hesitate for only a moment before nodding and whispering a choked 'yes'.
He reaches down and pulls my shoes off, then places his hands at the fastening of my pants. I watch him undo them and start to take them off. I feel exposed, vulnerable, but when he wraps his arms around me and kisses me deeply, I forget it and succumb to him. Anything he wants, at this point he could have.
He starts to kiss my neck again, then my chest. I lay still on the bed, apprehensive, yet not about to stop him. He looks up at me a final time for approval before his hands find my briefs. I close my eyes when I feel his hand and gasp when I feel his mouth. Although I don't want to imagine him having done this before, I don't see how he couldn't have. You can't just know how to do what he's doing with his tongue. Then again, I know what he can do with his tongue while he's kissing me. I don't know how long I'm going to be able to hold out. It certainly isn't going to be very long, I'm barely holding on now. He lays his other hand on my thigh and I moan when he intensifies his actions. Barely a minute later I'm clinging to the sheets.
"Roger. . . I'm. . ."
I can't finish before it happens. He doesn't move away and when I open my eyes I watch his face for a reaction. He pulls the blanket out from under us and lays it over me, then himself, reaching to remove his shoes. He wraps his arms around my waist and presses his front to my back, kissing the back of my neck gently. I shift in his embrace until I'm completely comfortable.
"Roger?"
He makes a noise to show he's heard me.
"Don't you. . ."
"You don't have to do anything you don't want to, Mark." He says softly.
"Maybe I want to." I say, offended.
"Whatever you want, Mark." He tells me.
I turn around in his arms so I'm facing him. I reach for his shirt first and like he did for me, pull it off. His upper body is formed well, toned and hard. I like his arms most of all, the arms that have held me countless times. Always so comforting and strong, I love feeling them, being able to see all of them. When his pants are gone, and his boxers with them, I cautiously reach for him, comforted by his hand on my arm.
"Roger?"
"Hm."
"What does it taste like?"
He chuckles softly. "It's not horrible. Mark, you really don't. . ."
"I want to." I tell him stubbornly. If he can do it, so can I. I move the blankets off of us and hesitantly move down and close my mouth over him. He moans softly, and the idea of pleasuring him gives me reassurance and confidence. He rubs my back gently, telling me what to do, how I'm doing. Although at first it's intimidating since it makes me feel like I don't know what the hell I'm doing, which is true, I find it helpful and start to listen to him and am rewarded with the increased pressure of his hand on my back and the rising urgency in his voice.
"Marky, you don't have to. . ." He tries to say before he releases, but I ignore him. If he can do it, I can. It's really not all bad. I'm not going to beg for a glassful everyday, but it's tolerable. He pulls the blankets back up and I lay against his chest, his arms around me. He kisses my forehead and then settles back into the pillow.
"Mark?"
"Hm?"
He pauses, which I find unusual for him. It takes him a moment before he continues. "What would you say if I said I think I might love you?"
Despite my initial surprise I smile against his chest. "I'd say I love you too."
+++
Notes Continued: Oh sap sap sap! And smut smut smut come to think about it. I'm such a perv, making innocent little marky and rog-rog do dirty things together. I guess you can't help the way your brain works. Mine just happens to be a wee bit pervy. I don't really believe many of you will complain though. Thanks for reading/reviewing! I'll try to update a lot this week cause I'm leaving on vacation Friday and won't be back for a week or so. Florida. Boo-yah. Mickey here I come. But until then I hope you've enjoyed!