Disclaimers and summary on first chapter
Notes: Thanks as usual for your reviews and such, I'm such a slut for them. ;) I like this chapter because there's some of that HS M/R cuteness in it, and some (cough) I'm not telling! I probably just gave it away though. Anyway, enjoy!
Chapter 45 -We're Not The Same People We Were Then-
+Roger's POV+
I walk beside Mark, looking over at him occasionally. He seems sadder than usual. I brought him out to cheer him up, but now I think maybe it would have been better to just let him be. I want to put my arm around him, or hold his hand, but I don't know how comfortable he'd be with it. In the past I've usually let physical contact between us in public be on his terms, him being more nervous about it than me. Sometimes he'd surprise me though, or allow me to take a small action, but after being so forceful about wanting to take it slow I don't want to confuse him.
"Where are we going, Rog?" He asks me.
I shrug. Then an idea comes to me. "Hey, you wanna go see a movie?"
He looks over at me, his eyebrows raised. "Rog, you don't like going to movies."
"Sure I do." I lie. He looks unconvinced. "Really. Lots of fun. Besides, you really like to, and you never do."
"We don't have money to waste."
"Don't you ever do anything fun?" I ask him.
"Well, with dealing with a reformed junkie I happen to be in love with, his stripper girlfriend keeping us apart, being dumped by my own girlfriend for another woman, not to mention fatal diseases slowly killing half of my friends, and trying to find money to pay for food and rent that you're trying to spend, no, I don't have any fun."
I stop walking and pull him to a stop with me.
"I didn't know you felt that way."
"You never bothered to ask."
I lay my hand on his cheek and bend over and kiss his forehead. Fuck taking it slow if he's hurting this bad. I expect him to flinch or try to deflect my actions, but he does nothing, he almost welcomes them.
"I'm sorry, Marky." I tell him.
He manages a weak smile. "Don't call me Marky."
I pull him into an embrace, holding him tightly, feeling his hands gripping my shirt, his head against my chest.
"I love you." I whisper to him.
He sniffs. "I love you too, Rog."
I feel wetness on my head, then more on my arm. It starts to rain as he pulls away.
"Oh fuck."
He just laughs and slips his hand into mine. "You told me you were taking me to see a movie anyway."
I grin at him. "Damn straight." I kiss his cheek and squeeze his hand as we start walking.
"So what is this?" I ask him. "I mean, don't you care that we're on the street?"
He shakes his head. "I don't care anymore. I 'm not wasting my time with you because I'm scared of a few idiots. What happens, happens."
It's a speech I had always hoped to hear from him. Excitedly I take my hand away from him and put it around his shoulders. He moves closer and wraps his arm around my waist. I kiss his temple as we walk.
"Here." I tell him, pointing at a theatre we're coming up on.
"Here?" He asks. "This place is shit!"
The place he's referring to is a dilapidated, very old theatre that plays grainy, artistic crap that shouldn't be released anywhere. Exactly the sort of thing I had imagined Mark enjoying. My first apartment with April was very nearby here, I remembered seeing it my first week and thinking about Mark. I'd always wanted to take him here.
"I thought you'd like it." I tell him, pouting.
"No, no. It's great." He says, reading one of the peeling posters outside.
"Oh, so you mean it's like, 'the' shit?"
He laughs at me. "Yeah!"
"We're so tragically not hip."
"Maybe you are." He says.
I feign hurt and he laughs softly and kisses my cheek. I pull him to me and kiss his lips.
"What are we seeing?" I ask him.
"There're only two movies, Rog." He looks at the other poster and points at it. "That one."
Once I've paid and we've gone inside, Mark looks around the theatre's inside.
"Rog, there's no one else here."
"There's still about ten minutes. Maybe a couple of other film junkies like you will wander in."
He flinches at the word 'junkie' and I inwardly scold myself for using it. We sit in the back of the theatre, Mark puts his arm around me and leans against my shoulder. When the movie begins, Mark looks up at me.
"There's still no one here." He whispers.
"So why are you whispering?"
He grins at me. "You know what we would've done now back in high school?"
I groan. "And you've always said I was perverted. Don't even think about it."
He kisses my chin and then my lips. It's fine until he starts to move his hand up my leg.
"Mark, really." I breathe. "I don't have any condoms."
He raises his eyebrows. "Whoa! Now who's going too fast?"
I kiss him again. "I hate you."
His hand moves farther and I gasp. "I haven't given you a reason to yet." He says.
"Damn you." I whisper.
His fingers play around the zipper of my pants, finally slowly undoing it.
"No. . ." I say, making one last desperate effort before his hand slides into my pants. I kiss him harder, my own hand now finding its way to his pants.
"Fuck, I want you." He says against my lips.
"You are such a slut." I tell him, chuckling softly. "No one would ever guess."
He laughs as well and I moan when he quickens the pace of his hand. I myself am having trouble, seeing as how I'm not left-handed and finding his zipper and successfully undoing it is rather difficult. Finally though, I succeed and am able to take similar actions to his. I'm rewarded with his own moans of pleasure. The movie continues despite our lack of attention.
"Oh Jesus, Mark. I'm gonna. . ."
"It's ok." He whispers, kissing me again. "It's alright."
I grab at his arm with my other hand and tilt my head back and with a low moan I allow release. He kisses my throat, letting his tongue drag over the sensitive skin. I give myself a minute for some recovery, then remove his hand and refasten my pants. Getting out of my seat I kiss him deeply, then lower myself to my knees in front of him. He laughs softly.
"Roger, what are you, oh. . ."
I take him my mouth, wrapping my hand around the base. He groans loudly, resting his hand on my arm, then tightening his grip. I run my tongue along his length and he whimpers softly and I know he won't last much longer, but then again, he never does when I do this. It's only a moment later I'm taking my seat beside him again.
"What's this movie about?" I ask him as he re-zips his pants.
"I don't really know." He says. "But the other one was something about lesbians."
"What?" I ask, incredulous.
He glares at me.
"Oh. Uh, I mean, yeah. Good choice. Totally."
He elbows me and I elbow him back. "Behave." I tell him.
"There's a first, you telling me to behave."
I kiss him gently. "I take it back. I actually like you better when you don't behave."
"Pervert." He says, grinning. It's harder to make him blush now that he's older. In high school a comment like that would have earned me an adorably shy smile and a bright red face. I kiss him again.
"This movie's bad." I whisper to him.
He shrugs. "I haven't been following." He takes my hand. "C'mon, let's get out of here."
"It's still raining, I can hear it."
"So?"
I smile and when he stands up I follow him out. We walk out together holding hands and start down the street, soaked before we've gone a block.
"Hey," He says suddenly. "How much money do we have left?"
I shrug. "Probably like five bucks."
He points at a building. "Let's get ice cream!"
I laugh at him, because he looks pretty excited. "Alright, sure."
We hurry inside, eager to get away from the cold rain. I hand Mark the money I fish out of my pocket and find us a table. He comes back a minute later with an enormous sunday.
He hands me a spoon and I dig into it before he even sits down.
"Hey, slow down!" He laughs.
I stop the spoonful I have in the air and move it toward my mouth as slowly as possible. He groans.
"Don't be weird."
I turn the spoon toward him and hold it out in front of him. He gives me a strange look, but opens his mouth. When I take the spoon away he does the same thing to me.
"Hey, you've got some on you." He laughs. He leans across the table and kisses me on the chin, then on the lips. He tastes sweet. When he sits back he smiles shyly at me. I grin back at him. I like this new Mark, that makes the first move in public, that doesn't mind that he might take a little heat for loving me. He knows this time that it's worth it.
+++
"Are you sure you wanna do this, Rog? We don't have to, not yet, you know." He whispers.
I shake my head. "I'm sure." I kiss him, laughing softly. "We're both going to go insane waiting."
We make love, long and slow, with a love and tenderness I don't think we've ever achieved before. I've spent so much time pining over our days together in high school and thinking how much better off we were, how great our relationship was, I never considered what it would be like if we built upon what we had instead of trying to duplicate it. We're not the same people we were then, we're not going to love the same way, we're lucky we still love each other now. I think he gets it this time, he's stopped focusing on me as a guy, he sees me as his lover now. I've matured. And although that means that lighthearted kid I was in high school isn't really possible anymore, I think I could be better. I hope I can be. I want to be. For Mark.
+++
Notes Continued: Mmm... hurried sex scenes. This story is slowly becoming less of a story and more The Soft-Core Adventures of Mark and Roger. Lol. Uh... I don't know what to do next chapter for the oldies, any suggestions? Like, honestly. If not it might be awhile while I think of something. ;) Chappie 46 coming sometime tomorrow, I just have to type it up. (I really need to find a life outside of fanfiction... lol.)
Notes: Thanks as usual for your reviews and such, I'm such a slut for them. ;) I like this chapter because there's some of that HS M/R cuteness in it, and some (cough) I'm not telling! I probably just gave it away though. Anyway, enjoy!
Chapter 45 -We're Not The Same People We Were Then-
+Roger's POV+
I walk beside Mark, looking over at him occasionally. He seems sadder than usual. I brought him out to cheer him up, but now I think maybe it would have been better to just let him be. I want to put my arm around him, or hold his hand, but I don't know how comfortable he'd be with it. In the past I've usually let physical contact between us in public be on his terms, him being more nervous about it than me. Sometimes he'd surprise me though, or allow me to take a small action, but after being so forceful about wanting to take it slow I don't want to confuse him.
"Where are we going, Rog?" He asks me.
I shrug. Then an idea comes to me. "Hey, you wanna go see a movie?"
He looks over at me, his eyebrows raised. "Rog, you don't like going to movies."
"Sure I do." I lie. He looks unconvinced. "Really. Lots of fun. Besides, you really like to, and you never do."
"We don't have money to waste."
"Don't you ever do anything fun?" I ask him.
"Well, with dealing with a reformed junkie I happen to be in love with, his stripper girlfriend keeping us apart, being dumped by my own girlfriend for another woman, not to mention fatal diseases slowly killing half of my friends, and trying to find money to pay for food and rent that you're trying to spend, no, I don't have any fun."
I stop walking and pull him to a stop with me.
"I didn't know you felt that way."
"You never bothered to ask."
I lay my hand on his cheek and bend over and kiss his forehead. Fuck taking it slow if he's hurting this bad. I expect him to flinch or try to deflect my actions, but he does nothing, he almost welcomes them.
"I'm sorry, Marky." I tell him.
He manages a weak smile. "Don't call me Marky."
I pull him into an embrace, holding him tightly, feeling his hands gripping my shirt, his head against my chest.
"I love you." I whisper to him.
He sniffs. "I love you too, Rog."
I feel wetness on my head, then more on my arm. It starts to rain as he pulls away.
"Oh fuck."
He just laughs and slips his hand into mine. "You told me you were taking me to see a movie anyway."
I grin at him. "Damn straight." I kiss his cheek and squeeze his hand as we start walking.
"So what is this?" I ask him. "I mean, don't you care that we're on the street?"
He shakes his head. "I don't care anymore. I 'm not wasting my time with you because I'm scared of a few idiots. What happens, happens."
It's a speech I had always hoped to hear from him. Excitedly I take my hand away from him and put it around his shoulders. He moves closer and wraps his arm around my waist. I kiss his temple as we walk.
"Here." I tell him, pointing at a theatre we're coming up on.
"Here?" He asks. "This place is shit!"
The place he's referring to is a dilapidated, very old theatre that plays grainy, artistic crap that shouldn't be released anywhere. Exactly the sort of thing I had imagined Mark enjoying. My first apartment with April was very nearby here, I remembered seeing it my first week and thinking about Mark. I'd always wanted to take him here.
"I thought you'd like it." I tell him, pouting.
"No, no. It's great." He says, reading one of the peeling posters outside.
"Oh, so you mean it's like, 'the' shit?"
He laughs at me. "Yeah!"
"We're so tragically not hip."
"Maybe you are." He says.
I feign hurt and he laughs softly and kisses my cheek. I pull him to me and kiss his lips.
"What are we seeing?" I ask him.
"There're only two movies, Rog." He looks at the other poster and points at it. "That one."
Once I've paid and we've gone inside, Mark looks around the theatre's inside.
"Rog, there's no one else here."
"There's still about ten minutes. Maybe a couple of other film junkies like you will wander in."
He flinches at the word 'junkie' and I inwardly scold myself for using it. We sit in the back of the theatre, Mark puts his arm around me and leans against my shoulder. When the movie begins, Mark looks up at me.
"There's still no one here." He whispers.
"So why are you whispering?"
He grins at me. "You know what we would've done now back in high school?"
I groan. "And you've always said I was perverted. Don't even think about it."
He kisses my chin and then my lips. It's fine until he starts to move his hand up my leg.
"Mark, really." I breathe. "I don't have any condoms."
He raises his eyebrows. "Whoa! Now who's going too fast?"
I kiss him again. "I hate you."
His hand moves farther and I gasp. "I haven't given you a reason to yet." He says.
"Damn you." I whisper.
His fingers play around the zipper of my pants, finally slowly undoing it.
"No. . ." I say, making one last desperate effort before his hand slides into my pants. I kiss him harder, my own hand now finding its way to his pants.
"Fuck, I want you." He says against my lips.
"You are such a slut." I tell him, chuckling softly. "No one would ever guess."
He laughs as well and I moan when he quickens the pace of his hand. I myself am having trouble, seeing as how I'm not left-handed and finding his zipper and successfully undoing it is rather difficult. Finally though, I succeed and am able to take similar actions to his. I'm rewarded with his own moans of pleasure. The movie continues despite our lack of attention.
"Oh Jesus, Mark. I'm gonna. . ."
"It's ok." He whispers, kissing me again. "It's alright."
I grab at his arm with my other hand and tilt my head back and with a low moan I allow release. He kisses my throat, letting his tongue drag over the sensitive skin. I give myself a minute for some recovery, then remove his hand and refasten my pants. Getting out of my seat I kiss him deeply, then lower myself to my knees in front of him. He laughs softly.
"Roger, what are you, oh. . ."
I take him my mouth, wrapping my hand around the base. He groans loudly, resting his hand on my arm, then tightening his grip. I run my tongue along his length and he whimpers softly and I know he won't last much longer, but then again, he never does when I do this. It's only a moment later I'm taking my seat beside him again.
"What's this movie about?" I ask him as he re-zips his pants.
"I don't really know." He says. "But the other one was something about lesbians."
"What?" I ask, incredulous.
He glares at me.
"Oh. Uh, I mean, yeah. Good choice. Totally."
He elbows me and I elbow him back. "Behave." I tell him.
"There's a first, you telling me to behave."
I kiss him gently. "I take it back. I actually like you better when you don't behave."
"Pervert." He says, grinning. It's harder to make him blush now that he's older. In high school a comment like that would have earned me an adorably shy smile and a bright red face. I kiss him again.
"This movie's bad." I whisper to him.
He shrugs. "I haven't been following." He takes my hand. "C'mon, let's get out of here."
"It's still raining, I can hear it."
"So?"
I smile and when he stands up I follow him out. We walk out together holding hands and start down the street, soaked before we've gone a block.
"Hey," He says suddenly. "How much money do we have left?"
I shrug. "Probably like five bucks."
He points at a building. "Let's get ice cream!"
I laugh at him, because he looks pretty excited. "Alright, sure."
We hurry inside, eager to get away from the cold rain. I hand Mark the money I fish out of my pocket and find us a table. He comes back a minute later with an enormous sunday.
He hands me a spoon and I dig into it before he even sits down.
"Hey, slow down!" He laughs.
I stop the spoonful I have in the air and move it toward my mouth as slowly as possible. He groans.
"Don't be weird."
I turn the spoon toward him and hold it out in front of him. He gives me a strange look, but opens his mouth. When I take the spoon away he does the same thing to me.
"Hey, you've got some on you." He laughs. He leans across the table and kisses me on the chin, then on the lips. He tastes sweet. When he sits back he smiles shyly at me. I grin back at him. I like this new Mark, that makes the first move in public, that doesn't mind that he might take a little heat for loving me. He knows this time that it's worth it.
+++
"Are you sure you wanna do this, Rog? We don't have to, not yet, you know." He whispers.
I shake my head. "I'm sure." I kiss him, laughing softly. "We're both going to go insane waiting."
We make love, long and slow, with a love and tenderness I don't think we've ever achieved before. I've spent so much time pining over our days together in high school and thinking how much better off we were, how great our relationship was, I never considered what it would be like if we built upon what we had instead of trying to duplicate it. We're not the same people we were then, we're not going to love the same way, we're lucky we still love each other now. I think he gets it this time, he's stopped focusing on me as a guy, he sees me as his lover now. I've matured. And although that means that lighthearted kid I was in high school isn't really possible anymore, I think I could be better. I hope I can be. I want to be. For Mark.
+++
Notes Continued: Mmm... hurried sex scenes. This story is slowly becoming less of a story and more The Soft-Core Adventures of Mark and Roger. Lol. Uh... I don't know what to do next chapter for the oldies, any suggestions? Like, honestly. If not it might be awhile while I think of something. ;) Chappie 46 coming sometime tomorrow, I just have to type it up. (I really need to find a life outside of fanfiction... lol.)