Vincent's Talk Show
By Xardas
Episode Twelve: 'The Legend of Rosiana'
Vincent: Hi welcome to the third episode of series two!! I'm Vincent Valentine... hibbidy jibbedy WHAAAAT!!! Heres our guest for the show, the self-convinced writer, Ashley!!
Ashley walks onto stage
Ashley: Hi, I'm sooo happy to be on the show, I love it as much as I love my own books, ok maybe not, my books are really good even though they mean nothing and are used professionally as the cure for insomnia!!
Vincent: Ok, so tell us about your books!
Ashley: Oh! Nows my time to bore you on how wonderful it my Legend of Rosiana story is!! A beautiful dragon made of rose petals that created a wondrous Utopai! I wrote that word by throwing scrabble tiles on my desk! how fun! Whats a Utopai? you idiots! its called education! hebbyhebbyblibblywibbly! But then Utopai was over runned when Odegimor showed his face and destroyed everything! oh the planet of Esunia, the word that I stole from final fantasy, which holds my lover Tom, whos name fits in no way whatsoever with everything else, but that's because he needs to be called Tom to stimulate my fantasies about this boy at my school who's cock I want!! He will protect me when the rose dragon man comes!! cobbly wobbly bobbly. In my story Final Fantasy VII's world was created by him along with FF VI, FF IX, and well maybe others!
Vincent: Highly unlikely... some hyperactive 7 year old girl whos had a taste of sugar could not create a complex fantasy world with creatures who change colour when they become more difficult to defeat!
The crowd cheer in agreement to Vincent's defence
Vincent: So any who what is this story about?
Ashley: ...well as I said before....
Vincent: Oh yeah you already said!
Ashley: Yeah but there's more to...
Vincent: Yeah but no one cares!
Ashley: I do!
Vincent: And who else other than the person who wrote this book likes it?
Ashley: Steve....
Vincent: And he is.....?
Ashley: My imaginary friend....
Vincent: We'll be right back!
Theme tune
Vincent: Hey! Welcome back! I'm here with my brilliant guest, Ashley, a self-obsessed left right wing communist and right wing nazi wannabe politician.
Ashley: No! I'm a writer!
Vincent: Yeah that's what I said...
Ashley: No its not...
Vincent: Yeah it is... Think about it! any who we are actually a little run over by time... and, well, you've embarrassed yourself enough... so bye bye
Ashley is hastily ushered off stage...
Vincent: Ciao!! (to camera) See you next time!
Theme Tune