Warnings: Violence. (To the effect that I will suffer violence at the hands of my beta reader when she finds out I used her for this week's quote. =^-^= No actual violence in this episode, though.)

Disclaimer: My current defence against any corporate lawyers who might decide to beat down my door and present a "cease and desist" order from BanDai is that I've been working on this for a WHOLE YEAR now, and if they even tried to shut me down, they'd have hordes of angry fans swarming all over them and plucking out each and every one of their body hairs, one by one by one. Right guys? *looks expectantly at her readers* ... *crickets chirp* ... =o_o;= *gulp* Uh...right? =D

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Episode Forty-Eight: The Boomerang Effect

"Every moronic thing I've ever done has come back to bite me in the end. Given the rate at which I still do moronic things, I may never sit down again." ~Rachel Perrin

May 24th, 1902

Not long after the sun decided to make its presence known that morning, a slim figure in green and gray lurched drowsily across the back lawn, heading away from the house and towards the stables. The early interruptions of sleep had continued for Trowa, but he was too concerned with not offending his closest friend to even think of suggesting that he and his sisters were too loud and too many. His only reasonable alternative was to keep bunking in the hayloft for a few hours each morning, to reclaim the lost slumber that he needed so badly.

The route he took was becoming more regular with each trip, even though he consistently made the trip while half asleep. Out the back door, through the terrace, past the gazebo, past the hedge maze, down the gravel path and turn right at the coachhouse. Some nights, his dreams included hazy representations of him walking that route, long before Quatre and his sisters even made a peep to awaken him, but it always became reality soon enough. Trowa stumbled through the stable door and closed it, lumbering up the ladder to the hayloft with the usual half-hearted agility and flopping on the thick layer of hay, face-down. He would have been asleep in less than a minute.

"Pillow?" a soft voice asked.

Trowa lifted his head groggily, saw the blurry white squarish object being offered to him, and managed a smile. "Mrrf..." He took it with both hands, squished it up into a comfortable lump, and flopped back down. It felt so much nicer than the hay, he wondered why he hadn't thought of smuggling one out to the barn sooner.

Beside him, the owner of the soft voice stifled a chuckle, but only just. Trowa's eyes flew open, and he jumped up off the pillow, startled as what just happened finally started to sink in. Quatre was sitting cross-legged next to him with his leather-bound holy book and a pillow for himself, grinning. The look of shock on Trowa's face was too much for the gardener, and he started laughing.

Trowa sat up and leaned heavily against the upper wall of the stable, rubbing his eyes. "How long have you been here?"

Quatre clutched his side where the laughter was making his muscles sore, and brushed at his eyes with his sleeve. He must have been holding that one giggle in for hours. "I left a note for the girls and slipped out around twelve-thirty, when I knew you were asleep. You should've seen your face just then!"

"...I didn't want you to find out," Trowa groaned.

Though he still smiled warmly, Quatre ceased his snickering and crawled through the hay to sit right next to his friend, propped up against the wall as well. "Did you honestly think I wouldn't notice? You've been sneaking out for days, maybe even weeks, and you really believed I wouldn't come looking for you eventually?"

Trowa shrugged, still only two-thirds of the way to being totally awake. "I didn't want to hurt your feelings. I know how much you love having your sisters around, but I haven't had a full night's sleep since they arrived. You know I wouldn't say a cruel word against them now that I know how kind they are to you, but...I'm a total wreck because of them!"

Quatre put an arm around his friend to prop his sleepy self up with, and fluffed his own pillow up on his lap for a comfortable place to rest his other arm. "You'll be relieved to know that I've already talked it over with my sisters, and they're prepared to make it up to you."

"Quat, they do beautiful work, but I really don't need any more baskets or rugs or potted plants," Trowa protested quietly. "...and I'm really not that comfortable with the aromatherapy massage either..."

"No, no, no," Quatre corrected him. "I mean we've all agreed that we should pick ourselves up very quietly in the morning, tip-toe out to the north side of the back lawn, and take our prayers there, instead of disturbing your sleep."

Trowa shook his head firmly. "But I can't force them out of the house, even for a few minutes! Someone might see them!"

"Who's going to see us? I checked the whole north side of the house myself and there are no bedroom windows on that wall, and it'd be dark out most days of the year. Besides, it'd be better for us anyway, because at the north end of the lawn, we can get a less obstructed view of the east." Quatre smirked to spite himself and the trouble his family had caused. "When you think about how the beds are arranged in our room, when we're all facing Mecca, you're directly in our line of fire," he said, gesturing a straight line away from himself with one hand.

"Still, I'd sooner move to a different room myself than make you all slink around outside where you might be seen, even if the chances are slim to none," Trowa said, yawning immediately afterwards.

Quatre tightened the arm around Trowa and squeezed him closer, taking a gentle hold of his limp, green-sleeved arm with his other hand. "But I don't want you to leave," he whispered. "I'll agree to anything else, but not that. With me working in the gardens and you tending the horses, we hardly see each other except at mealtimes, and I'd...I'd miss you."

Their eyes met, and even in a snoozy fog teetering on the edge of sleep, Trowa saw the worry and sincerity in Quatre's gaze. "How about this, then...we all stay in the same room, but we'll move the furniture around. We'll put both our beds in the north corner facing the door, shove the table and chairs off to the side, and give your sisters as much of the floor space as they need on the east side of the room. How would that be?"

Quatre gave him a relieved smile. "I think that would work just fine."

Trowa yawned again and leaned a little more heavily against the gardener. "I still wish they'd let us bring some extra beds into the room...they shouldn't have to sleep on the floor like that."

"Now, we all agreed," Quatre reminded him, looking straight ahead at the opposite wooden plank wall, "that would only bring suspicion if someone walked in and saw all the extra furniture, and they all said they're perfectly used to it. Doesn't bother them a bit. They'll be so happy to know you were so concerned about upsetting them, and me, that you went to all this trouble day after day, trying to get some sleep. We really do appreciate you putting up with us and all the turmoil we've caused...in fact, you've been a lot more understanding of my whole life than a lot of people would have been. I don't say this as often as I should, Trowa...but your kindness means so much to me."

Trowa snored. It wasn't clear at what point during Quatre's speech he dropped off, but dropped he did, completely and permanently. Quatre almost laughed again, but forced himself not to, for fear of waking him needlessly. Since there was already a pillow on his lap, he gently lowered Trowa down into the hay, resting his weary head on the pillow, and amazingly, didn't disturb him at all.

Poor thing...going through all this for me... Quatre smiled and brushed Trowa's bangs away from his face, deciding to sit up with him until he had gotten all the sleep he needed. Clever, too. It took me quite awhile to find out where he was hiding himself. He looked around at the cozy little nook the hayloft had turned out to be; it was quiet, secluded, and could accommodate two people very easily, with room to spare for anything else they might need. There could be pillows, blankets, books, food, an electric lantern, anything, and nobody from the house would be likely to suspect for a long time.

It's nice up here, apart from the smell of horses, but if Trowa's gotten used to that, it mustn't be that difficult. The more he thought about it, stroking Trowa's cinnamon hair with a smooth, hypnotic motion, the more attractive the hayloft seemed as a hiding place. Maybe I could get used to it too...then we'd both have a place to go where nobody can find us. That could be very nice indeed.

**********

It had taken quite some time, but most of the damage done to the manor had finally been repaired. Otto had contracted a master glazier to duplicate the antique window on the second floor that had 'accidentally' been smashed, and the front lawn had been combed over and over to eliminate each and every shard of glass before any of it could pierce one of Frederick's unsuspecting paws. All that remained to be fixed was Relena's reputation, which she seriously thought had received a near-fatal blow, thanks to Heero's temper. Now, it was time to pay the piper.

Once the total value of the cleanup had been assessed and duly deducted from Heero's wages, he was marched into the parlour in complete silence, with Otto in front of him and Doris behind, to make sure he didn't make a run for it. Doris, having been made wiser by the passing of many years, was certain that the Peacecraft name had suffered no damage, and that the whole confrontation with Duo's adopted parents was highly amusing, but orders were orders. She and the burly house steward delivered their charge promptly at the stroke of nine that morning to be dealt with by his employer.

And may God have mercy on your soul, the maid thought as they shut the parlour doors and retreated to a safe distance.

Relena stood with her back to the doors for a long time, and when she finally turned around, she definitely didn't have her happy face on. Heero stood tall and proud with his hands clasped behind him, unafraid of her wrath, but found himself hesitating for just a moment when she beckoned him forward. "I've committed a great deal of thought to the matter of what to do with you," she commenced. "Otto believes you should be dismissed for your actions. My uncle and Baroness Catalonia had a similar opinion, but it also seems that the majority of the staff sides firmly with you. I suppose it's something of a testament to the rapport you've developed with them during your tenure here. None of this truly matters, however, as the final decision is mine alone."

Heero said nothing in his defence. If he was forced to leave, he'd be taking Duo with him and that was that. Goodbye, moral obligations, hello, nice little flat in Carshalton.

"I may be persuaded to be lenient if we get a few things straight between us," she continued, lacing her fingers together at waist height. "If you confess the reason behind your little outburst, I might forgive you and allow you to stay."

It seemed reasonable enough, Heero thought. "Duo won a substantial amount of money at the racetrack, but couldn't collect because of his age, and when his mother arrived, she was only interes--"

"Don't try that on me!" Relena scoffed. "I'll give you one more chance to tell the truth, and that's all you'll get!"

Heero squinted at her, genuinely confused. Couldn't Relena see what an angry, hateful person Duo's 'mother' was? "I understand that you enjoyed Mrs. Maxwell's company, but she wasn't--"

"Oh, come off it, this isn't about Mrs. Maxwell!" Relena snapped gruffly. "This is about me and Marcus, we both know that!"

Heero bristled with wide, angry eyes. "Excuse me?"

"You can't stand the thought of me being happy with anyone else, that's why you chose that exact moment, when he and I were saying our farewells on the front lawn, to destroy my window and terrorize my guest!"

"That is ridiculous," Heero said calmly. His voice was quiet, but his glare was shooting past ninety degrees and threatening to boil over.

"Is it?" Relena shot back with sudden, equal calmness. "You've never liked Marcus. You've never had anything good to say about him!"

"I've never had anything to say about him!" Heero logically insisted. He really didn't see where all this was coming from.

"Your continual employment will stay in jeopardy until you admit that you set out to humiliate me in front of him because you don't approve of our friendship!"

Slowly, the picture came into focus, and Heero began to see exactly what she was aiming for. He quieted down and acted aloof. "I honestly couldn't care less what madam does in her private moments, and with whom. My concern for this house and its occupants finishes at the front door."

Relena clenched her tiny fists briefly and scowled in frustration. "That's not true! You hate Marcus because you think he's the reason I broke off our engagement! Confess it now, or you can pack your bags and get out!"

The faintest of smirks teased at Heero's entire face as he caught her Ladyship in another one of her self-contradictions. "You want me to be jealous," he whispered in triumph. "You want me to envy him for all the time you two spend together, and you're upset that I don't care."

Relena blushed through a frown at being found out. She looked away momentarily and blinked against the mists forming in her eyes. Quickly, she retreated to her mental bank vault and withdrew another pleasing rationalization. "You can pretend all you like, but you can't mask the truth," she said with subdued confidence. "You're dashing, strong, and intelligent...you could get a top position in any household in London for a great deal more money, and yet you choose to stay here. It doesn't take a genius to guess that you're staying for...another reason..."

Heero folded his arms defensively with a furtive sigh. He could see how it might look that way on the surface, but the naive girl had no idea of the sinister forces at work that were keeping him in that house, and to top it all off, she was still carrying some sort of a torch for him. It was unfortunate that she should be confused about their status, but he had instituted a new policy of considering his own needs once in awhile, when he knew what they were. "I think, if there's to be any question of me staying here, that madam should consider very carefully what she is saying."

Panicked at his tone of voice, which suggested that he was an inch away from quitting, Relena scurried forward a few steps, stopping at a high-backed wooden chair and clutching it with both hands. "No, don't go! I only want to know if you still have feelings for me! I want you to tell me the truth!"

"You don't know what you want!" Heero snapped, tiring of her games. "You never have! You once told me I didn't need to worry about the class barrier between us because you'd accept me in any class, and then told me you could get me into the higher echelons of society if I let you change me! Just now, you threatened to throw me out unless I admitted I acted out of jealously, and two minutes later, you're begging me to stay! I don't have a clue what you want anymore because you change directions so many times in one day that it makes me dizzy trying to keep up!"

Relena gaped at his insolence. "I change directions!? What about you!? When you started working here, you were kind, and charming, and made me feel like I was the most beautiful girl in the world! When you gave me that diamond ring, I thought you were prepared to spend the rest of your life with me, and then you turned into a sulky, snarly, miserable sourpuss almost overnight! And when I found out that you were still sharing a room with that, that...braided basket case, what was I meant to think!? Where are you both sleeping now!? Hm!? Do you think I don't know what's going on in my own house!?"

Heero glared silently. So that was it. It wasn't even about Marcus, it was about what really caused their 'breakup.' And as for knowing everything that goes on in your house... To illustrate how wrong she was, Heero walked slowly and stealthily to the parlour doors, keeping his eyes on Relena as he crept up to the mahogany monoliths. With extreme delicacy and care, he took hold of the left-hand doorknob, not moving it one bit. Then, with a lightning-quick motion, he twisted the knob and yanked sharply on the door. Sure enough, four crouching housemaids tumbled inside, falling all over each other as the support structure to which their ears were firmly pressed suddenly went away. Heero looked at the pile of nosy women, looked at Relena, clasped his hands behind his back again, raised his eyebrows at her in a miniscule victory dance, and walked to the other side of the room, by the piano.

Relena shut her eyes and slouched, slowly shifting back into authoritative mode to give the girls a severe talking to. Already exhausted and in no mood to be trifled with, she strode over to the clump of prim 'ladies' in black dresses and white aprons, shook her head, and waited for them to untangle themselves and form a line. They scrambled to their feet and brushed the dust bunnies off their uniforms, heads lowered, all except for Hilde, who was looking at Heero with sympathy and worry.

"Alright...how much did you hear?"

They all shrugged and blathered until Elsie said the first coherent words between them. "Well...'ardly anythin', Miss. We dinnit 'ear nuffink about why you two ain't gettin' married!"

Doris sighed, and Bethany slapped a hand over her eyes. Relena pointed an arm at the hall and ordered them out, warning that if she ever caught them eavesdropping again, they'd be polishing the ballroom floor with toothbrushes. Heero glanced over his shoulder at them as they shuffled out, and Hilde caught his eye with a strange look of loving concern. They didn't get a chance to speak as Relena shooed the housemaids away, but if he knew Hilde the way he thought he did, she'd be heading straight for the kitchen next.

Once they were alone again, Relena shut the door and walked a few steps away, lowering her voice. "Marcus is a wonderful young man, and I really do like him...but whatever it was that happened between you and me happened too quickly, and I don't know if I can move on until I understand it. If you respect me at all, I would think you'd--" She paused when Heero made a tiny, exasperated noise and a slightly distasteful face to go with it, most likely because of something she said. He didn't even realize he'd done it until she pointed it out. "And what was that for?"

Now that they were both in a foul mood, Heero really should have left it alone, but the temptation was too much. He turned to face her, arms still folded, and stared her down. "Are you accusing me of not respecting you? You, who once dragged me out of bed at four in the morning because you had a dream in which the horses turned into sea monsters, and actually sent me out in the cold and the snow to check on them to see if it was true?"

Relena lifted her chin and looked at the floor. "...that was a long time ago..."

"You, who can't stop showing me off to all your friends like some sort of trophy servant? 'My butler can do anything! He's so much more talented than your butler!'" Heero didn't come anywhere near the falsetto voice Marcus used when imitating Her Ladyship, but his point was clear.

"I never said anything like that to my friends!" the girl protested. "At least, not to their faces...besides, it's part of your job to be a gracious host to my guests!"

The butler's tirade continued, complete with bug-eyed expressions and wild arm gestures. "'Tell us what girls wear in Japan, Heero! Name all the state capitals in America, Heero! Say something in Swedish, Heero!'" He took a bold step forward and shoved a finger into the upturned palm of his opposite hand, as if pointing to a document. "Show me where in my contract it says I have to be a walking, talking parlour game!"

Relena leaned back a bit, visibly stung by his bitter words. She looked everywhere around the room except where he stood. "If you were so upset by it, you should have said something."

Heero looked away as well, calming down a bit. "I'm not sure how much it did, at the time...but perhaps it should have bothered me more. Still, I doubt it would have made much difference. If there's any one thing keeping us apart, it's your lack of respect, not mine, and that may never change." He could have added that an even bigger factor was that he simply wasn't interested, and would rather spend his time in the gym with his braided basket case, as she so eloquently described him, but he figured he was twisting the knife enough as it was. No need to be cruel.

"I have more respect for my staff than most people have on this block!" Relena said, trying to scavenge back some of her authority. "You all get your uniforms issued free, while a lot more like you don't even have a clothing allowance! They have to provide all their own wardrobes and wear them out during working hours, but I tried to treat you better than that! I'm not nearly as strict with my staff as I should be, so I don't see why you should have any cause to complain, because in my eyes, you've been treated exceptionally well!"

The butler's glare worsened. "I was practically a prisoner in Hampshire. You wouldn't let me leave the property without being interrogated, you broke the only working telephone, I have a sneaking suspicion that you were withholding my mail, and--"

"Wait one second!" she yelped. "Alright, yes, I did restrict your freedom somewhat, but we were engaged then, and there were certain things I felt it was my duty to protect you from. And yes, I did keep a few letters that arrived for you, but I gave them all back."

Heero squinted. "When?"

For that, Relena didn't have a quick and easy answer. Nobody yet knew that she was in the little servants' cottage in Hampshire the day Heero went berserk, that she had seen some key staff and acquaintances there, or that by not coming forward with the details of what happened, she felt they were all still lying to her. Heero also didn't know that he had lashed out at Relena and inflicted a split lip and several bruises on her delicate person; she was saving that ugly truth for when she really screwed up and needed to deflect his scorn with guilt. She twisted a bit of ribbon on her dress between her fingers and concocted a partial lie. "I knew you were hiding from me in that little thatched cottage...so, as a peace offering, I collected together all the letters I was keeping from you and...pushed them under the door."

A rapid yet detailed search of Heero's memory produced no such event, but then, he had been pretty much out of it for several days. Somebody would have told me if a stack of letters turned up out of nowhere, surely...unless nobody noticed them and they're still sitting in Hampshire... "Where were these letters from?"

"But...didn't you get them?"

"No."

Guilt took a few stabs at the girl and nearly drew blood, but she had brought the letters right inside the cottage, and it could hardly be called her fault if they were carelessly overlooked. "They were from the Isle of Wight, mostly...and two or three from London in scribbly handwriting."

"I see." That was something of a relief; most of the lost letters were probably from Lord Jeffrhyss, and Heero had no fervent desire to communicate with the man anyway. Duo mentioned writing a few scribbly, badly-composed letters to him from Bridlewood, ones with little or no substantive value other than pleas for a sign that Heero was alright after their other lines of communication were cut. If they were all truly lost, he could easily cope with that.

Relena looked down at the bit of lace in her hands and twisted it more vehemently, admitting to herself with shame that she had hidden something more, purely out of spite. "And one from Ireland, but that one was addressed to Duo, not you."

Suddenly, there was a sharp thump at the door, followed by an 'Ow!' in a very musical tenor. Heero immediately sighed on the inside as Relena thundered up to the door and pounded on it with the side of her right fist. "Who's out there!?" she hollered.

"Nobody," the mousy voice said timidly. "When did I get a letter? I don't remember getting a letter! Where is it? Can I have it?"

Relena flung the door open and glared at the new eavesdropper, holding his head where it had made sudden and unexpected contact with the solid wood door; this was fast becoming an epidemic. She frowned with distaste at the boy and folded her arms sternly. "And I suppose you were 'just passing' and happened to overhear?"

"Maybe," Duo said after a short think. "Don't be too hard on the maids, they didn't tell me anything about scrubbing the ballroom floor with toothbrushes, really they didn't! Now, first, when did I get a letter, and second, gimmie it. Please?"

Swiftly summoning up his powers of reason, Heero guessed that Hilde had indeed sprinted downstairs and told Duo he was being talked about, and that Duo had snuck upstairs to hear for himself. It was also plain that he hadn't heard the entire conversation about the letters. Heero cleared his throat and beckoned the boy over. Duo gave Relena an excessively wide berth as he navigated through the jungle of fine furniture to stand by Heero.

"Earlier this year, in the county," Heero began in a low voice, "Her Ladyship apparently knew about the cottage where I was studying for those university entrance exams in complete solitude..." The emphasis he put on the abject lie alerted Duo to the fact that this was the best cover story he could think of on such short notice. He waited for the glimmer of understanding to appear in Duo's eyes before continuing. "She had some letters of mine at the house, and delivered them to me by shoving them under the door."

Before Heero had even finished speaking, Duo paled. "And...there was a letter for me...from Ireland?" His gaze drifted over to Relena, accompanied by a sinking feeling of the worst kind.

Relena was taken aback by the way Duo just stopped blinking. "Yes...yes, there was, and I realize now that it was wrong of me to--"

"Where in Ireland!?" Duo yelled, bounding over to Relena and grabbing her uncouthly by the arms. "You've gotta remember!"

"Take your grubby hands off me!" Relena complained, shoving him away.

"If you can't remember what town it was from, the county will do! Was it Kerry? Clare? Galway? What!?"

"Quiet you! After I dropped off those letters, I absolved myself of any further responsibility towards them! If you can't find them now, it's your own affair!"

Duo thought for a moment, then clasped his hands together languidly and smiled, opting to placate rather than debate. "You know what? You're right. I bet I just put them away and forgot about them." Still smiling, he nudged her out into the hallway, ignoring her squeaks of confusion. "Well, I know you're a busy lady, so I'd better let you get back to doing whatever it is you do, and thanks a bundle for helping us out there, you''ll have to remind us to do the same thing for you someday. Bye now!" He all but slammed the parlour door in her face, whirled around, and leaned tensely on it, wide-eyed like a startled deer, in case she tried to get back in.

Heero looked at him sternly. "You actually know what she's talking about, don't you?"

Duo pressed his ear to the door and listened for any kind of motion on the other side, then began slowly walking towards Heero, wringing his braid in both hands with guilty look on his face. "Heero...I didn't think you'd ever find out...but I burned those letters! I saw them lying in a pile on the floor of the cottage, and they looked like they were all from Jeffrhyss, so I tossed 'em! I had no idea there was a letter for me mixed in!" He stopped walking just out of arms' length, looking all fearful and pathetic and cute. "You're not mad at me for ditching your mail without telling you...are you?"

Heero thought about that briefly. He must have burned them out of brotherly concern, and there was probably no real harm done, since Jeffrhyss was well aware that he was back in London. "No...but tell me next time."

Duo nodded numbly and sat down on the nearest available solid object, a piano bench. Now all he had to worry about was his own lost letter, and if Relena was right about what little she saw, it was a great deal to worry about. "Someone in Ireland must have been trying really hard to track me down, and that was months ago..."

Heero pulled up a red plush chair and sat down opposite Duo, with his elbows perched on his knees. The sad tale they had shared was trickling back into Heero's memory, and thoughts of Helen, her sudden illness, and the quarantine placed on her home flew back and forth across the space between them, silently. "Can you think of who it might have been?"

"...I knew a lot of people there...but I don't think I knew anyone well enough for them to still want to contact me..." Duo gnawed on his lip and picked nervously at the black band holding his braid together while he thought about the few years he spent on the Emerald Isle. "There was the doctor that came to the house and told me to leave, but I can't imagine...or maybe...maybe old Mrs. Kelleghan who lived next door to us, but she's probably...long gone by now..."

The boy's discomfort with the subject was obvious. Any other painful point he could laugh at and feel stronger for his laughter, but not this one. It wasn't even the concept of death that struck him, because he had cheated death on more than one occasion; the deaths of his loved ones, however, was another matter.

"Heero...I have to go there. I have to know who's looking for me."

That was unexpected. Heero sat up straight and wondered if it was really such a good idea. "Whatever was written in that letter was old news a long time ago. They probably think you've ignored it, and they've most likely given up on you or they would have tried again."

"But that's exactly why I have to go! Not just for them, but for me! I'll go crazy if I have to stay here wondering who wanted to talk to me and why!" Duo let go of his braid and ran both hands through his bangs instead. "It might be someone who knew Helen. They could have something really important to tell me, like...like a message. They probably only found me 'cause I keep getting my name in the papers so darn much..."

Also a tender topic. If Duo wasn't so prone to being splashed all over the press, his adoptive parents might never have known where he was or how much money he might have been worth. "How long would you be gone?" Heero asked. His reasons behind the question were just as selfish as they could be, for in this instance, the good of the manor trailed behind at a distant second place.

Duo calculated in his head, then shrugged. "It shouldn't take more than a day or two, and Hilde can manage by herself in the kitchen for that long, I know she can." A sly grin crept across his face, and he leaned forward on his knees. "You know, if I wanna do this by the book, then I have to get official permission from you to take a leave of absence, since you're in charge of the whole staff. Besides Otto, I mean."

Heero harnessed a slight smirk as Duo got up, crept around behind him, hung both arms around his shoulders and bent down close to his ear.

"Maybe...maybe a humble offering of super deluxe triple fudge brownies would be a sufficient bribe to exchange for your ever-so-official permission," Duo purred.

The always-alert butler knew darn well when he was being needled for a favour, but considering the source, he didn't mind a bit. "As long as we inform Otto well in advance...you can go."

Duo clamped his arms around Heero's neck and squeezed, choking him. "Thank youuuu!" Heero winced and waited for Duo to tire of playing boa constrictor, but didn't try to free himself. When Duo finally let go, they both stood, but Duo caught hold of Heero's hands and trapped him in place again, swinging their arms playfully back and forth. "That being said...wanna come with?"

Heero was naturally surprised, but rather liked the idea. Still, with Relena's good favour hanging by a thread, it might not have been wise to ask for too much from her too soon. "I don't think we should both be away from the house at the same time," he said cautiously.

"But I don't wanna go there alone," Duo moaned weakly. "I haven't travelled that far by myself for a long time."

"You made it all the way to America by yourself."

"Yeah, but I knew you were on the boat somewhere...so, c'mon..." Duo inched forward and smiled. "You can get a couple days off, I know you can."

Running away to Ireland, even for a short while, sounded pretty good compared to staying in London with all sorts of bad moods flying around the house. "It's tempting," Heero admitted quietly. Finally, crumpling shamelessly under the weight of Duo's hopeful stare, he nodded. "I suppose we can both slip away without any drastic repercussions."

Duo hugged him hard. "We need some time away from this place," he said. "It's been really rough lately, y'know?"

"I know."

Trembling with relief, Duo unwrapped himself from Heero and made a very relaxed jog to the parlour doors, pausing before opening one and ducking his head outside. The hall was empty. "Oh, by the way...I'm glad you didn't get reamed too badly for what happened with my folks," he said. "It's just a shame you had to get in trouble at all. Hilde pretty much heard the whole thing, and she said 'Lena whaled on you something awful."

Heero walked over and stood with him in the open doorway, replaying the morning's events and feeling no regrets. "There were things that had to be said...and I got a few good blows in, myself."

"Great job," the chef praised him, slapping him lightly on the arm. "Hey, just be thankful she didn't get started on the food budget! I don't know if she knows how much I'm spending with Quat's sisters around, but when she finds out, it's gonna be hell on wheels!" With that very poignant observation, Duo turned around and headed back to the kitchen to work on lunch. Heero stayed in the doorway and looked worried again, for he hadn't even thought about the food budget. He shut the parlour door and went back to his own work, hoping that in the excitement of the last few weeks, Relena hadn't noticed.

**********

"...and you should see what he's done to the food budget!" Right in the middle of an individually-baked serving of strawberry shortcake, Relena was giving Marcus a blow-by-blow account of everything that was going wrong in her house, starting with the chef and the butler. "His spending has gotten totally out of control!"

"Deary me," Marcus said noncommittally in his lazy Liverpool accent. He and Her Ladyship were seated at a little round table with a prim white lace tablecloth, outside in the sunshine on the lawn of a very prestigious estate somewhere in London. They were there for the celebration of Queen Victoria's birthday, which the owners of the estate had declared would continue to be celebrated on May 24th of each year for as long as they owned the property. It was a garden party to which many of England's elite were invited, the same garden party Relena had attended with Otto exactly a year previous, the infamous day on which she made the acquaintance of one Heero Yuy. Joining the pair on this occasion were Dorothy and Treize, although the latter hadn't stayed at that table long before spotting Lady Une a few yards away and defecting to her table.

"Honestly, it feels as if I've lost control over my own house sometimes," Relena whined, diving back into the shortcake and unleashing her frustrations on the dainty dessert. "Do you ever have staff problems like that?"

Marcus was trying hard to pay attention, but also had Frederick on his lap, and the pouncy puppy was taking up a lot more mental resources. "Mum and Dad entrust the actual day-to-day operations to underlings, so I really don't know, but I get along alright with our servants. They're practically family."

"Well, I think you're both asking for trouble," Dorothy butted in after only her second glass of sherry. "Treating servants like family is like never putting one's dog on a leash. They'll walk all over you, take everything you have for themselves, and you'll never get the stains from their muddy feet out of the carpet. It'll be the ruin of you both unless you exercise some of your rightful superiority and put them in their place."

Frederick pricked up his pointy little ears and tilted his head to the side, wondering if he should be offended by the pretty-smelling human or not. Marcus was definitely offended, but held his tongue, knowing that the two girls were still friends, despite their managerial differences. "So what has your cook done to the food budget?" he asked, trying to deflect the topic slightly.

Relena put down her fork and daubed at her lips with an embroidered handkerchief, clearly glad that he asked. "I figured it out all by myself. We have a few school textbooks in our library, and I read one about basic mathematics that had all sorts of useful things in it for manipulating numbers. I gathered up all the records of what Duo's been spending on food for the last six months and compared them to what he's spending now, and the expenditures have increased by exactly fifty percent! It's as if there are another six people in the house!"

Dorothy had just lifted her sherry glass again and was in the middle of a sip when Relena made the statement about six extra people; the Baroness froze. Six extra people. Six sisters. I knew there were at least two, but this could mean I have even more work ahead of me than I thought! She swallowed at last and put the glass back down, carelessly letting a drop of the golden liquid roll down the cut crystal surface and blot into the tablecloth.

"What do you plan to do about it?" Marcus inquired.

Relena chewed slowly on a bit of cake and wondered how much to tell the boy. It was a complicated mess she'd gotten herself into, for both she and Heero seemed to need a certain proximity to each other, and yet they had both threatened the other with their mutual separation over and over, so much that it was difficult to know when such threats could be believed. It was made twice as complicated by Duo's involvement, and as cozy as she was in Marcus' presence, she wasn't yet ready to divulge to him her most sordid fears about the potential goings-on behind the manor's closed doors. "I don't know."

"Well, you ought to at least find out where all the money is going," Marcus added, working hard to balance the fidgety Frederick, who had spotted a sparrow hopping around a few feet away and wanted to go play with it. In his effort to escape the boy's grip, Frederick stamped his back paws down hard on something he shouldn't have, and Marcus yelped. "Ouch! Gordon bleedin' Bennett, mind where you're puttin' them paws!"

Dorothy laughed heartily, but Relena had strangely lost attention for the conversation, and was too deep in thought to be dragged out to giggle at Frederick's impudence, or Marcus' sudden and comedic lapse into a very lower-class accent. Heero's right. I do want him to be jealous, for his sake as much as mine...oh, what am I doing? I shouldn't even be thinking his name while I'm with Marcus, not after all the fuss I made about liking him so much, but...in the end, I expect I'll find some excuse to let Heero stay...because I honestly can't stop thinking about him.

"And what about that butler of yours?" Marcus asked next. He had successfully flipped Frederick onto his back and was bouncing him like a baby. The little dog seemed to enjoy it. "That was quite a show he put on last week," he said with a smirk and a raised eyebrow.

Relena sat up straight and did her best to act professional, as she came to a reasonably professional decision. "I've decided to keep him on after all. Otto's already ordered new uniforms for most of the staff, Heero included, and it'd be a shame to have them sit in a closet with nobody to wear them, now wouldn't it?" The other two nodded their heads and agreed, thinking it the most sensible thing they'd heard Relena say all afternoon. She finally tossed her honey blonde locks over her shoulder and laughed her aristocratic laugh. "That's the trouble with hiring people so young! They keep growing out of their clothes faster than they can wear them out!"

Laughter rolled all around the table, and as if on cue, the band jumped into a Viennese waltz that brought dozens of people up out of their chairs and into a blank patch of grass next to the buffet tables. Marcus handed Frederick off to Dorothy and asked Relena to dance, and of course she accepted. A few tables away, Treize and Lady Une were already gliding away from their places and floating into the crowd, keeping closer to each other than anyone else. Within moments, they were totally entranced with one another, and saw no one else in the entire park.

"The reading of the will grows closer and closer, my dear," Treize cooed to his brunette companion. "Once Lord Peacecraft's estate is settled, and his wealth entrusted to me, I could be counted among the five most powerful men in the world."

"No one deserves it better, I'm sure," Lady Une purred back at him.

"My strength will be secured in every nation on the globe. Kings and queens will kneel in my presence, and all the earth shall fear my name." Treize pulled Une closer as they swung through a series of elegant turns in the dance. "Does power like that excite you?"

Une favoured him with a catlike smile. "Yes, my Lord Count."

"Good."

Not one of the other guests at the garden party knew that there was a gentleman among them who planned to crush them all into dust as soon as he was able, a man who might have been only days away from having the wherewithal to start wars and wipe out nations with a stroke of his pen. Not one of them knew it, and it was a much happier day for living in ignorance.


~~~~~~~~~~

Next, in Episode Forty-Nine: The British army issues its final, official word on the fate of young Captain Peacecraft, and Relena puts all other worries aside to deal with the outcome. Meanwhile, Duo and Heero make tracks to Ireland in the hopes of finding the author of the lost letter.

Ahhh, I love it when a plan comes together. *blows on a little party favour trumpet thingy* One year! =^o^= Meesa so happy! Next episode will be June 3rd, and it's going to look like I'm following last year's schedule for awhile, but there's reasons for everything, and it'll shift into new dates in a little while. TTFN!