Ch. 9
There was no one home when Summer got back from school and she was glad. She hurried up to her room and took Seth's letter out of her desk drawer. Setting it on the desk Summer began to prepare for her last date with Seth. She took a shower using the shampoo Seth liked the best, even though Summer thought it made her hair look dull. Summer shaved and used the body wash that Seth bought her to match her favorite perfume. Out of the shower Summer pinned her hair into a French twist, leaving the ends loose. She curled the loose strands of hair and spritzed on perfume. Summer put on the dress she'd bought for Spring formal. It was a simple floor-length lavender chiffon gown, not her usual style, but Seth would have liked it. Carefully Summer applied light make-up and just the right amount of body shimmer. She wandered around her room putting scented votive candles on most available surfaces. It was four-fifteen, still too early for a date. In her formal-wear Summer went down to the kitchen for some scissors. Scissors in hand, she walked into the garden. She cut a handful of daffodils, a few irises, the last of the pale pink roses, and a few white ones too. Returning to the kitchen Summer carefully arranged her bouquet in a crystal vase. Cautiously Summer carried the flowers back upstairs, glad she hadn't put on her shoes yet. In her room Summer set the bouquet on her desk. "Thank you Cohen," she whispered, embarrassed that she was pretending the flowers were from Seth. She moved a candle away from the bouquet. Four-forty-five. Was five too early for dinner if they were going to a dance at six, or a movie after dinner? Probably not. She slipped on her high heels. Summer lit the candles and turned off the lights. She took a deep breath, why was she so nervous?
Summer picked up Seth's letter and sat on the edge of her bed. Her hands shook. It was stupid and weak, but there aren't exactly etiquette rules on how to handle the death of your boyfriend. Especially when he leaves a note. Oh god, he'd left a note. What if Seth hadn't been killed? What if it was deliberate? "No," Summer told herself, "he e-mailed Anna and asked about homework. Someone about to commit suicide doesn't ask for homework assignments." So, not a suicide note. That didn't necessarily mean the letter was good news. It could be a Dear John letter. Or a here's-the-five-bucks-I-borrowed note. It didn't matter, Summer decided. No matter what, the note was from Seth. She was scared, but so excited. This was possibly the next-best-thing to being with Seth again. Summer turned on her stereo to a carefully selected CD. She entered the track number and checked to make sure it was on repeat. Nervously Summer pushed play and soothing piano music filled the room.
It was an old CD. Summer had been ten the year this CD had been popular. Seth probably wouldn't have enjoyed the sappy musical stylings of Donna Lewis, but they comforted Summer and this song was oh-so-apt.
If I could put you on top of a cake I would ice you, And keep you wrapped up in a box to be near you. If I could, I would.
Summer didn't have much of a box of souvenirs with Seth. They hadn't been dating long enough, but if she did she would revere them.
If I could touch you again with my fingers so gently, If I could feel you breathing in time next to me,
Summer remembered the first time she had woken up next to Seth. How loved he'd made her feel, wanting to see her the next morning. He had convinced her it wasn't just about the sex.
But the silence surrounds me, Flashing memories of you, riding with the moon that night, I never had the chance to say goodbye, goodbye.
No one had gotten a chance to say goodbye to Seth, and that was what made this so hard. That was the point of this date.
Lost forever, lost to another world, Gone forever, but remembered in our thoughts you are.
Summer wondered if Seth had any idea what an impact he'd made on his family and friends, Ryan and Anna specifically. Or at Harbor, people actually missed him. Seth would have been shocked.
If I could open the heavens above I'd be with you, If I could hold you again in my arms I would tell you, That I love you
She should have told him that, definitely. Summer hadn't been certain, but she did love him. Very much. The song started over and Summer opened the envelope.
Dear Summer,
She could hear Seth's voice in her head. Summer turned off the music.
Dear Summer, I was thinking about you earlier. In Western Civ. actually, watching you flip your hair. I was thinking how great it is that I know about that little mole at the base of your skull. How many other people know about that mole? Three? Five? I love that mole. Say "Eww" if you must, you know you want to... but I love that mole. I love everything about you. I love you Summer. I don't think I tell you that enough, grand Coffee-cart- declarations aside, but I do love you. Love, Seth PS- Call me later
Summer burst into tears, not caring about the mascara that streamed down her face. He loved her, she loved him, and they could never be together.
There was no one home when Summer got back from school and she was glad. She hurried up to her room and took Seth's letter out of her desk drawer. Setting it on the desk Summer began to prepare for her last date with Seth. She took a shower using the shampoo Seth liked the best, even though Summer thought it made her hair look dull. Summer shaved and used the body wash that Seth bought her to match her favorite perfume. Out of the shower Summer pinned her hair into a French twist, leaving the ends loose. She curled the loose strands of hair and spritzed on perfume. Summer put on the dress she'd bought for Spring formal. It was a simple floor-length lavender chiffon gown, not her usual style, but Seth would have liked it. Carefully Summer applied light make-up and just the right amount of body shimmer. She wandered around her room putting scented votive candles on most available surfaces. It was four-fifteen, still too early for a date. In her formal-wear Summer went down to the kitchen for some scissors. Scissors in hand, she walked into the garden. She cut a handful of daffodils, a few irises, the last of the pale pink roses, and a few white ones too. Returning to the kitchen Summer carefully arranged her bouquet in a crystal vase. Cautiously Summer carried the flowers back upstairs, glad she hadn't put on her shoes yet. In her room Summer set the bouquet on her desk. "Thank you Cohen," she whispered, embarrassed that she was pretending the flowers were from Seth. She moved a candle away from the bouquet. Four-forty-five. Was five too early for dinner if they were going to a dance at six, or a movie after dinner? Probably not. She slipped on her high heels. Summer lit the candles and turned off the lights. She took a deep breath, why was she so nervous?
Summer picked up Seth's letter and sat on the edge of her bed. Her hands shook. It was stupid and weak, but there aren't exactly etiquette rules on how to handle the death of your boyfriend. Especially when he leaves a note. Oh god, he'd left a note. What if Seth hadn't been killed? What if it was deliberate? "No," Summer told herself, "he e-mailed Anna and asked about homework. Someone about to commit suicide doesn't ask for homework assignments." So, not a suicide note. That didn't necessarily mean the letter was good news. It could be a Dear John letter. Or a here's-the-five-bucks-I-borrowed note. It didn't matter, Summer decided. No matter what, the note was from Seth. She was scared, but so excited. This was possibly the next-best-thing to being with Seth again. Summer turned on her stereo to a carefully selected CD. She entered the track number and checked to make sure it was on repeat. Nervously Summer pushed play and soothing piano music filled the room.
It was an old CD. Summer had been ten the year this CD had been popular. Seth probably wouldn't have enjoyed the sappy musical stylings of Donna Lewis, but they comforted Summer and this song was oh-so-apt.
If I could put you on top of a cake I would ice you, And keep you wrapped up in a box to be near you. If I could, I would.
Summer didn't have much of a box of souvenirs with Seth. They hadn't been dating long enough, but if she did she would revere them.
If I could touch you again with my fingers so gently, If I could feel you breathing in time next to me,
Summer remembered the first time she had woken up next to Seth. How loved he'd made her feel, wanting to see her the next morning. He had convinced her it wasn't just about the sex.
But the silence surrounds me, Flashing memories of you, riding with the moon that night, I never had the chance to say goodbye, goodbye.
No one had gotten a chance to say goodbye to Seth, and that was what made this so hard. That was the point of this date.
Lost forever, lost to another world, Gone forever, but remembered in our thoughts you are.
Summer wondered if Seth had any idea what an impact he'd made on his family and friends, Ryan and Anna specifically. Or at Harbor, people actually missed him. Seth would have been shocked.
If I could open the heavens above I'd be with you, If I could hold you again in my arms I would tell you, That I love you
She should have told him that, definitely. Summer hadn't been certain, but she did love him. Very much. The song started over and Summer opened the envelope.
Dear Summer,
She could hear Seth's voice in her head. Summer turned off the music.
Dear Summer, I was thinking about you earlier. In Western Civ. actually, watching you flip your hair. I was thinking how great it is that I know about that little mole at the base of your skull. How many other people know about that mole? Three? Five? I love that mole. Say "Eww" if you must, you know you want to... but I love that mole. I love everything about you. I love you Summer. I don't think I tell you that enough, grand Coffee-cart- declarations aside, but I do love you. Love, Seth PS- Call me later
Summer burst into tears, not caring about the mascara that streamed down her face. He loved her, she loved him, and they could never be together.