A/N: Thank you for the wonderful reviews, I have been going around the house singing ever since ^_^! While I'm writing this I have about 24 which is approximately…24 more than I expected. Ok, in reply to kitsune-oni, prowling wolf and Aurora Snidget- yes, I am a lonely writer who didn't have a beta reader. Well…I really should have checked through it more thoroughly than a skim…oopsie! Now I do have a wonderful beta however *beams at Ary* there shouldn't be many of them and if there are report back to her, mwhahahaa!
In reply to Unseen Stag- *gives massive virtual hug anyway so s/he comes out in hives* Woohoo, Snape the Ape! Can I use that as one of his nicknames? Pretty please?
To Kitsune-oni, Prowling wolf and Ary- HE'S MINE!!!!!! *runs away with Sirius tucked neatly under her arm* Waaahoo!
To Jewel Valentine and Prongsies- *throws the rat down big spiky hole and cackles insanely* ^___^
Thanks to Love speaks, silently (Well you reviewed didn't you! Hahaha), Pearls, Prongsies (I'm working on it for you!), Aurora Snidget (ack, first years, fourth years- what's the difference *hides head in shame*), Jewel Valentine, Doneril, razormouthrachel, Emily S (hope I was of some help!) JamesPotter09, Unseen Stag and Rolf?!
Chapter Five- Snape the Ape
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The Marauders had gotten inside Hogwarts without being spotted simply enough but here was the most difficult part. They now stood breathlessly inside the empty Great Hall and stood panting, huddled together.
The Hogwarts' crest hung, emblazoned on a banner, at the head of the Hall and every time a corner of it fluttered, Remus started and stared around with wide eyes.
'It's just the wind Moony,' James told him, slapping Remus on the back encouragingly. 'Stop being so jumpy, you're putting me on edge.'
Sirius, flushed at the face, tore his outdoor-cloak; the hood lined with slivery fur, over his head and dropped it to the floor. The others followed suit, the pleasantly crackling fire in the room was heat enough.
When each of their ragged breaths slowed and their breaths came more evenly, James ventured to speak again.
'Ok. Let's deal with the situation logically now. We need to find an antidote, agreed?' The other two nodded; Remus fervently but Sirius much more half-heartedly.
'Well then we need to go and find someone who is really good at potions. We obviously can't ask Professor Stickybat can we…' They all shuddered at the thought of the female Professor doing anything other than give them detentions.
'So who else,' James continued, 'is male, good at potions and stays behind during trips to Hogsmeade? Look I'll give you a clue…his name rhymes with ape.'
'Snape the Ape!' cried Sirius. 'Snivellus- of course, but will he help us? I suppose we are quite persuasive if we put our minds to it,' he said, sharing a wicked glance with James
Remus frowned and bit his bottom lip in thought. 'Could work,' he interjected doubtfully. 'Then all we'd have to do is go and find him. Do you remember him talking to The Potion Master last night saying he was going to go and help clean out the potion cupboard, Padfoot?'
Sirius nodded and looked to James. 'Now's a good enough time as any.'
A strange lopsided smile came to James's lips and he shook his head slowly.
'You seem to be mistaken somewhere, my dear Marauders. Seeing as you got us all into this fine mess, you will get us out. Meanwhile I am going to take a trip to the Gryffindor common room where, I gather, Lily Evans is still working on her Transfiguration essay. I'll come meet you down there.'
He smirked happily and gave them both a little encouraging push towards the great door.
Remus rolled his eyes in annoyance and with held breath, pushed open the door a crack to peer his head round. Sirius joined him, pressing his back to the door and clasping his fingers in the shape of a gun.
It was only when Sirius began humming the James Bond theme tune that Remus aimed a well-placed elbow to his ribs.
Sirius began making crackling noises under his breath then spoke seemingly to the Hogwarts crest on his robe,
'Come in Agent Moony? I repeat, do you receive?'
Remus reached over and cuffed the back of Sirius's head, who then shot him a venomous look as he redid his hair huffily.
'Just playing around Moony,' he said, sticking out his bottom lip sulkily. Remus made as if to hit him again and Sirius ducked away whimpering.
'Ok, ok, no joking around now, I get it!'
Stealthily the two dashed across the open space of the high-ceilinged atrium and ducked under an arch on the other side. They quick-stepped themselves frantically past some chattering second years and only slowed to a walk when they were in the dank and lonely dungeon corridors.
Turning a particularly dark corner where the torches in their wall brackets were more widely spaced, Remus and Sirius bumped into Snape a little earlier than they expected.
Brandishing his wand immediately, he snarled,
'Black and Lupin. In unknown territory I see.' And at that moment Sirius and Remus realised how dangerously close to the Slytherin common room they were.
Rather uncharacteristically, Remus, in a degree of panic, raised his wand before either Snape or Sirius could mutter their own jinxes.
'Impedimenta!' Snape froze up, his mouth contorted in a sneer. Sirius gave Remus an impressed look commenting, 'Nice show, Moony,' before muttering a spell of his own. The body of the conscious yet disabled Snape followed behind them as Sirius began again to walk.
Emus caught onto him, his face a picture of horror at what he had just done. 'I'm a prefect,' he kept muttering but Sirius hushed him when they reached the door to the potion cupboard. After a few complications it was open and pushing Snape inside after carefully removing his wand, Sirius muttered the counter curse to the jinx.
'We've got a little favour to ask you.'
* * * * * * *
James told the portrait of the Fat Lady the Gryffindor password with impatience. He crawled at great speed through the portrait hole reemerging on the other side, his eyes desperately trying to spot Miss Evans's trademark red hair.
After getting excited for a moment after spotting a different red head, James concluded that she must be in her dormitory.
He yelped as a younger Gryffindor girl began to trail her hand down his cheek and dove through the common room to the stair case. Making it safely, he began to climb the spiraling steps and stood on the landing between the stairs for the boy's dorms and the girl's dorms but was knocked backwards against the stonework by a flying student crashing into him.
'Careful, are you okay?' he asked quickly. But as he realised that it was Lily Evans who had knocked him over, his face softened. Her eyes went to meet hers evenly.
Now, he wasn't so horrible to look at, was he?
Taking the heaven-sent opportunity, James stepped forward and grabbed her hand. This was so uncharacteristic of James, the simple sweet gesture that Lily did not pull back just then
But when he reached out to kiss her, she withdrew her hand immediately and slapped it full across his face. Reeling from the sharp impact James fell back a few steps to look back up at a slightly bewildered Lily.
'What did you do that for?' he asked incredulously.
'What you thought I was going to kiss you back or something?'
James looked at the floor sheepishly. 'Kinda.'
'Euh!' she remarked, picking up her books on the floor from when they collided. 'Then you mistake me for some of those other girls who fall for your childish and utterly irresponsible charms.
'Aha! So you admit I have charms!' James shouted with enthusiasm. She rolled her eyes.
'Not ones to be proud of.' Readjusting the books in her arms, she walked off, past James and down th stairs to the common room. Listening in silence to her receding footfalls, James crossed his arms in annoyance.
Lily was so stubborn even a spell wouldn't work on her.
Sighing with defeat, James decided to join the other two in the potion cupboard.
A little Snape teasing did wonders for a bad temper.
* * * * * * * * *
When James entered the unlocked potion cupboard he saw Snape, back pressed against the wall with Sirius leaning threateningly over him and Remus standing back against the wall playing with Snape's wand.
'Now you wouldn't want everyone to know that your mother threw you out because she couldn't bear to look at you anymore, would you now?' Sirius was asking him.
'She didn't!' Snape spluttered, his normal sneer only lessened slightly by the situation.
'Ah, but who to believe…?' James responded raising his eyebrows.
'Potter,' Snape spat.
'Snivellus, a pleasure as usual.'
But as James began to wonder aloud about the different hexes he knew and would use on him, Snape's sneer dropped from his face and he interrupted James suddenly.
'I will make a bargain with you,' he said stoutly. 'It is a small thing for you and I will make your potion…it is simple enough with ingredients to hand like the ones in here.'
James, Remus and Sirius exchanged suspicious glances until James nodded to Snape to continue.
'Well?'
Snape looked embarrassedly to the ground and delayed for a moment.
'It's something quite personal…'
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Ok everyone all done! Now review to:
(a) Find out what Snape wants from the Marauders…
(b) Find out why Lily is unaffected by the potion…
(c) Have more James Bond style Sirius... ^_^
(d) Help throw the rat into the Bog of Eternal Stench… (ah…if only I could really kill him *dreams*)
(e) Win a massive virtual Sirius hug… (mine wasn't too popular)
(f) Be my favourist ever person in the whole world…
(g) Get the next chapter dedicated to you if you're review is the bestest…
Woohoo, that was a good and healthy list!
BUT WAIT! You cannot be get (e), (f) or (g) UNLESS you go and review my second ever fic called 'Did you say JUST Quiddich?' Starring our favourite Oliver Wood and Katie Bell. Ok, now I'm done. ^_^