Title: Episode Four: Why?
Author: Stormhawk
Rating: PG
Disclaimer:
Matrix universe and associated characters: Wachowski brothers.
ATS universe (of which this is a parody) co-owned by me and Overlord Mordax.
Angel, Star and T'Lorie belong to themselves. And the men with white coats.
Gingerbread man: Whoever wrote Shrek, and Dreamworks SKG
The lie detector: me
Word Count: 623
Summary: The adventures of the buggy random agents.
Notes: Umm…don't think so
Please read and Review.
"Why are you following me?" Jones finally asked Agent T'Lorie after he had walked around the agency for a full ten minutes trying to lose the buggy agent.
"Why not?"
"Don't answer my question with another question."
"Why not?"
"Agent T'Lorie do you want something or are you simply trying to irritate me?"
"I am simply trying to irritate you."
"Go away," the tech said as he slammed the door to his office.
"Geek!" T'Lorie yelled at the door.
Agent Jones opened his door, "you are also a tech agent," he reminded her.
"Yeah! Oh…" T'Lorie pouted and walked away.
***
"I want to interrogate a rebel," Angel said as she trailed Smith.
"Go find one then."
"Can't I just have one of yours?"
"We don't have any prisoners for you to interrogate."
"What about that?" She asked pointing at something.
"That's a recruit."
"That?"
"That's an agent."
"That?"
"That is a houseplant."
"Coolies, I'll go interrogate that then." Angel picked up the houseplant and skipped off down the hall.
"Do you think she can hurt herself?" Stef asked Smith quietly. "I mean, walking around seems to be a dangerous activity for them."
"Sir," Zane said walking up behind them
"Zane, where did you get that bruise?" Stef asked worriedly about the large purple bruise in the shape of Rhode Island on his face.
"Bob ran away, I'm the new punching bag."
"O…K," she replied as he walked away.
***
"Is it just me," Greer asked as Zane walked into the gym. "Or do you have a bruise the shape of Rhode Island on your face?"
"My, what keen observation skills you have," the other recruit said dryly as he drew his dagger. "Want to spar?"
Greer steadied his katana, "bring it on road-map."
***
"So tell me, Mr. Houseplant," Angel said as she slowly circled the innocent plant, which she had secured to a chair in an empty room of her agency. "What do you know about Zion?"
The houseplant, of course, said nothing.
She required a file and slapped it down on the table in front of it. "You've been living two lives haven't you?"
The houseplant said nothing.
"I will get the truth from you. You're a spy for the rebels aren't you?"
It didn't answer her.
"TELL ME WHAT I WANT TO KNOW!" she bellowed at the innocent piece of foliage.
"Very well," she said as she filled a needle with weed-killer.
"Not my gumdrop buttons," a squeaky voice said from near her.
Agent Angel blinked and looked at the gingerbread man. "What are you doing here?"
"I dunno."
"Go away."
"Ok," he said and disappeared muttering about the muffin man.
"You will tell me what I want to know," she said to the plant as she pumped the weed-killer into the dirt.
"Give me the access codes to the Zion mainframe," she hissed at it.
It still said nothing.
Getting an idea she required a lie detector. She put the various extensions onto the houseplant and switched the machine on.
"Do you know the codes to the Zion mainframe?"
The lie detector beeped. Then spoke. "It doesn't."
"Well, why not?"
"Because Agent Angel," the lie detector said in a Sherlock Holmes-type accent, "it is a houseplant. Now could you cease this ridiculous interrogation of a plant and get me a cup of tea."
"Don't count on it Sheerluck."
"Don't call me that," it said, as it required some tea for himself. "Hmm…tea, earl gray, hot."
Agent Angel required the plant back to the other agency then shook her head in confusion as the lie detector required a book and started to read it.
"Note to self," she said. "Keep away from English-accented-supposedly-non-sentient-items."
The lie detector sipped its tea.