*****Standard Disclaimer. I do not own FFX or the characters in it. They are owned by Square-Enix. I do own this story, and my original characters. The title of this chapter is from a song originally performed by Heart.******
Auron had not known, but Mercy also had a dream that night. A woman appeared before her, clothed in blue robes either trimmed or lined with fur. The woman appeared to be in her mid-30s, but it was difficult to tell, as only her face was exposed. "Who are you?" Mercy asked.
"I am called Shiva," the woman said. "You were right. If he had learned the lesson more easily, you would have met sooner."
"You are…one of the fayth?"
"Yes."
"I've seen you before, haven't I? I remember now. A flash of blue, out of the corner of my eye, the day I chose my apartment five years ago.
"Yes."
"And again. When I moved in. There were places, spaces…you…encouraged is even too strong a word…suggested, perhaps? that it would be better for me to leave them empty, waiting."
"We hoped, but we were not certain."
"You have let me find things, in the Archives, haven't you? Documents I've read once and never been able to find again. The map I have on the wall in my apartment that has no legend, Auron said it was a map of Spira…"
"That is correct."
"I'm not sure I understand, but why are you here? What happens now?"
"Whatever you wish."
"Whatever I wish?" Mercy sounded doubtful. "You are not manipulating events?
"Hardly. We only…present choices, if it is possible, if the conditions have been met. We cannot force the choice upon you."
"Then you…open doors," Mercy said, in sudden understanding.
"Yes," Shiva replied, "but only you can walk through them."
"So, what happens now is what we make happen?"
"Yes."
"Until Sin comes."
"Until then."
Mercy spoke quietly now, almost to herself. "I've never had a relationship last two years, let alone five. It's ironic, isn't it, that this time, five years isn't to going be enough. But it wouldn't have mattered if we had met the day he arrived. I don't believe either of us would have been ready for it then. And I don't think ten years would have been enough, either. This time, a life time wouldn't be enough."
Shiva gazed at her unblinkingly for several seconds, studying her. "You see truly. That is the first trial. We will meet again." Shiva snapped her fingers, and Mercy fell into a dreamless sleep for what remained of the night.
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The second time Mercy encountered Shiva occurred more than a month later. Auron had known about the events, but not about the fayth.
Mercy's life was fuller than it had been, richer, happier certainly. It wasn't simpler. It definitely wasn't less busy. If anything, it was even more hectic than before. The difference was that each activity was measured on a different scale. Anything that wasn't a joy for its own sake, or wouldn't matter during the next five years or after five years, just plain wasn't done. They both tried, as much as possible, not to look either forward, or back, just to enjoy each day.
She had been looking a little forward to not working Thursday nights. She felt guilty this first time, coming in at one in the afternoon, knowing she was leaving at five, taking a half day's leave time, or, at least she did until she opened up her appointments calendar and discovered that Lord Halle, the Head of the Archives and Hall of Records, had inserted himself into her schedule for a 2 o'clock meeting with no advance notice. If it was good news, their Lord- and Ladyships asked when you were available. When it was bad news, they made you available. Then, this was bad news. But what?
She checked with the secretary, but Bette had no idea what it was about, so at 2 o'clock sharp she presented herself at his Lordship's office. He made her wait fifteen minutes, which was also not a good sign.
She was finally permitted to enter the pretentious office. It was intended to impress, all wood and glass, with beautiful views of the city, but she found herself wondering if anyone ever looked at the books inside the pretty cases. The office was actually rather like its occupant. Lord Halle was in his mid 50's, tall and distinguished looking at first glance, but after being with him for a few minutes, you realized that there wasn't much substance behind the polished veneer. Since he wanted to be seen as the 'no-nonsense' type, he tried to get straight to the point of the meeting, or, straight for him, anyway.
"Mercianne, correct?"
"Yes, sir."
"I see from your records that you have been with us for some time, now."
"Yes, milord."
"You've done some excellent work."
"Thank you, sir."
"I'm disappointed to see such a fine record besmirched by such sordid extra-curricular activities."
Did anyone actually still use words like 'besmirched'? Aloud, "Pardon me, sir, but what are you talking about?"
"This sphere recording." At which point, he pressed a few buttons, and a sphere player opened and began to play back a slightly grainy recording that Mercy instantly recognized. Oh bloody hell. The encore, that night at the open mic when everything happened. Auron had asked for 'Slow Hand', and she'd practically given it to him. Onstage. She really wanted a copy of the recording, since whoever made it had been sure to record Auron's expression while she was singing. That was priceless. The recording was illegal, totally bootleg, but that was hers and Daf's problem, and their lawyer's, not Lord Halle's, or the Archives'. What was he going on about?
Lord Halle turned to her. "You must understand, this kind of performance is not in keeping with the image that the Archives wants to project to the public. You cannot continue this sort of public display," he said distastefully, "if you wish to maintain your position here at the Archives."
Mercy was astonished. "Let me be sure I understand you. Are you telling me that you are requiring me to either give up my performing contracts or resign my position in the Archives?"
He was pleased that she saw things so clearly. "Yes, I am."
"On what grounds, sir? Please show me where it is stated in the personnel regulations that this is not permissible. I have been very careful over the years to always keep the Personnel Department fully informed of all my performing and songwriting contracts to ensure that no such questions would ever arise." Mercy was indignant.
"The performance on this recording is simply not in keeping with the dignity of this institution. You must either cease such displays or resign, or I will have you fired!" His voice was rising now, in fury.
Mercy's voice went cold with anger. "I do not believe that you have the right to force any such action. I will be seeking legal counsel in this matter." She left his office before she exploded. It seemed like the wisest course. As soon as she reached her own office, she started to pick up her communications 'link, then realized that it would be a bad idea. Internal communications could be monitored, and if he really wanted to fire her, he would be looking for a reason. After 3, she went outside, and used her personal 'link to call her lawyer. The lawyer was the only one she could reach. Daf taught classes until 4, and Auron hated to use any machines he didn't absolutely have to. Up until today, personal 'links had been in the category of 'didn't absolutely have to'. She was going to sit on him tonight until he agreed to get one. She needed to talk to him, and couldn't reach him. He would have to use her 'link tonight to call Tidus, too. Sooner or later, someone was going to show the boy that sphere, just to see how he would react. It would be easier for him if he knew in advance.
After she talked with the lawyer, she decided that if it came to a fight, she was going to have to fight. That night, she had to explain it to Auron. "Why are you fighting this? Does it matter?" he asked.
She spoke quickly, urgently, trying to sway him with her conviction, if logic wouldn't do the job. "I don't need the money, if that's what you're asking. Not for the next five years, anyway. I imagine I could teach a few dozen more girls the martial arts, not to mention take all the little kids' classes off your hands. But, from what the lawyer told me, I couldn't quit now, because no one knows how the rules will be changed if I do. And anyway, I'm not a quitter. And, if he really tries to fire me, the most likely legal grounds will be that I have a second job, any kind of second job. There are a lot of people at the Archives with second jobs. Most of them need those other jobs to pay the rent or put food on the table, for them they pay for the necessities, not luxuries. And they can't afford to fight. If I give in to him, they'll have a really rough road for a while, maybe a long while, and they don't know how long it will be. I can afford this fight, and they can't, so, I'm fighting for them. Now do you see?"
"Yes, I see." He saw that this was part of why he loved her so much. She would fight to protect others, even if she got hurt in the process.
While he was being agreeable, she decided to press on. "Will you please get a damn 'link?"
"Why?" he asked in resignation.
"Because I almost went crazy this afternoon. I needed you and I couldn't reach you." Now, finally, she let go and started to cry. After everything that had happened in this long, strange day, she let the reaction sweep over her. He folded her into his arms and held her close. "Okay, I'll get a 'link." As he stroked her back, he wondered, why she always had to go all the way to the wall before she admitted she couldn't do everything alone? Not that I'm any different, he thought ruefully.
As soon as she calmed down, she got Auron to call Tidus. He told the boy to go into his room and close the door. As soon as he was alone, Mercy got on the 'link, and explained that there was a bootleg recording of one of her concerts around and that she might be in trouble for it. "But why are you in trouble?" the boy asked.
"I'm not completely sure. I think my boss is a nutter, mostly. Someone you know will eventually play it for you, I'm sure. I don't have a copy, or I would just give you one. The performance was, well," she blushed, "suggestive, I guess, but the trouble isn't about the recording, its about the fact that I might get fired, and it might be rather messy. I just wanted you to know in advance, that's all. To warn you, I guess."
"Why warn me?"
"I didn't want you to be blindsided. That's what friends are for. I'll explain the rest of it on the weekend, but I just didn't want you to be surprised. Okay?"
Friends, huh? he thought. What he said was, "Okay."
The crowd at both the clubs they played in that weekend had clearly heard or seen something. If not the actual recording, at least the gossip. In the entertainment business, there was almost no such thing as bad publicity, so they were happy to capitalize on whatever interest was generated. Daf hadn't been worried about the sphere for himself, just for her. He had been very much in the background fuzz on the recording. He could only hope the whole mess didn't cause her too much trouble at her regular job.
Tidus had seen the recording by Sunday. It did disturb him a little, but he tried not to show it. He had been grateful for the warning. The kid who showed him the recording was not a friend, and had been looking for him to react badly. Just because he had a crush on Mercy, didn't mean he wanted anyone to know about it, ever.
A week passed in something like normalcy. A few people at work avoided her at first, for fear that whatever trouble she was in might be contagious, but as the days passed, and nothing happened, people stopped worrying about it. Mercy learned that there had been an endless parade of lawyers through Lord Halle's office, but that His Lordship had not seemed pleased with the advice they gave him.
The following Saturday night's concert was attended by a surprising guest. At the table next to the one that Auron habitually occupied a "Reserved" sign was placed on the table before the club opened. Five minutes before Mercy's first set, a lady in her late 70's with a female attendant and two of what could only be called bodyguards were escorted to the "Reserved" table with a great deal of fuss on the part of the manager. During the performance, Auron was somewhat disconcerted to find that he was as much under observation as Mercy and Dafydd, who were, after all, on stage expecting to be stared at. He wasn't.
They had also noticed the unusual group in the audience, but it didn't change anything. They had already decided which numbers to sing, including "Slow Hand", figuring that as long as the bootleg recording was going around, people would want to see them perform the song in question. It was a good night. During the set break, while Mercy and Dafydd were in the back, Auron noticed that the lady at the next table had a "discussion" with her entourage. There seemed to be a change in plans. Clearly, she was supposed to leave at the end of the first set, but she had decided to stay for the second set as well.
On Monday morning, Mercy was astounded to discover that, instead of being fired herself, the Archives now had a new Head, Lord Halle's mother, of all people, Lady Belina. Lady Belina had requested that Mercy make an appointment to see her at Mercy's earliest convenience.
It was convenient at 10 in the morning, an hour later. When Mercy arrived at Lady Belina's office, she was shown in immediately. Mercy was not totally surprised to discover that Lady Belina was her mystery audience from Saturday night, but she was still confused about the sudden change in the management of the Archives. The Lady invited her to sit down. "You look puzzled, my dear."
"Yes, milady. Why were you were in the audience Saturday night?"
"I wanted to see what all the fuss was about. But we'll get back to that in a moment. First, I wish to apologize for my son's behavior. Your service to the Archives has been exemplary, and you are correct, there are no grounds to request your resignation or for your dismissal, nor are they desired or requested. And please do not stop performing, your voice is lovely."
"Milady, I accept your apology. And, thank you. I'm just, well, surprised."
"My son is a fool, and several lawyers told him so. When he refused to listen, I asked him to step down as Head of the Archives. I came to see your performance because I wanted to see, and hear, for myself. I couldn't help but notice that you did the same song, but it wasn't the same, not at all. Why was it so different?"
The question had really been a command, Mercy was well aware. She studied the older woman. Lady Belina was in her late 70's, she knew, but was still straight, and still showed traces of the beauty she had been in her youth. She clearly still ruled her family, as well. But Mercy thought she saw a twinkle in the older woman's eye. She had a feeling that Lady Belina might have a pretty good idea of most of the answer already. Maybe she'd had a few nights like that herself, long ago. Mercy began by talking about the performance. "All live performances are inherently unique, milady, but that particular night was very special."
"In what way?" the Lady probed.
"The man I perform with, Dafydd, is my adopted brother. We've been performing together for over 20 years. That night, we were being scouted by an agent to be asked to be a booked act, which did happen, but at that moment, it was all hope, anticipation, possibility, and, we were 'on', everything was working, the crowd had asked for an encore, didn't want to let us go…" Mercy was reliving that night, caught up in that moment again.
"and…" the Lady broke in. She knew there was more, and she was waiting to see if Mercy would admit it.
Mercy closed her eyes a second, remembering that feeling of incandescence, seeing how it appeared on the recording, and continued, "and the man who asked for the song, Auron, the night before that recording was made, was the first night we'd been lovers, so that night was special for us, too, a night of hope, beginnings, possibility, so many things, all captured in that one song, one performance. I may sing that song a thousand more times, but no night will ever be like that one."
Lady Belina said, "Thank you, Mercy, for sharing that with me. For a moment, you reminded me of my own youth." She waited several minutes before she continued. Letting them both return to the present. "Before you go, I would ask you, what might I do to make up to you, let us say, for any anxiety that my son may have caused you?"
Mercy had to think about it for a long time. She looked out the windows of the office, and thought of all the times she had wondered what it would be like to be promoted to one of the Executive Administrator positions, but realized the irony of the situation. She could have one of those positions for the asking, right now, but she no longer wanted one. Or anything else that Lady Belina had within her considerable power to grant. The only thing they wanted was more time, and Lady Belina didn't have that kind of power. "I thank you for your generous offer, milady, but your apology was all that was necessary."
"If you are certain…"
"I am, milady. Thank you." Mercy left Lady Belina's office easier in her mind than she had been for over a week. She did not regret not taking the Lady up on her offer. The temptation had not been very great. Anything within Lady Belina's power; promotion, a recording contract, more concerts, more students for Auron's dojo, would have taken time, and that was in too short a supply. Right now they had a kind of balance, enough time apart not to get on each other's nerves, but a lot of time together as well. What they had was so precious, especially since they had both given up hope of ever finding each other, but had refused to settle for second best. They were both old enough to know the value of what they had found, and young enough to enjoy it.
On her way back to her office, suddenly, everything and everyone in the world stopped except for herself, and the woman in the blue robes appeared before her again.
"Willingness to fight on behalf of others. Refusal of desired rewards freely offered. You have passed the second trial." Shiva voice rang in the suddenly chill air. Mercy shivered.
"You have done well, child. Better than we hoped." The fayth paused. "We will meet again." Shiva snapped her fingers, and the world around Mercy returned to normal.
End Chapter Nine
