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Thanks for the reviews:
Iluska: I actually did the story before putting everything up, so far there's eleven chapters but they're not finished yet (sweat drops) heh
tigerlilly: OH MAN!!!!!!!! (mouth wide open and eyes bulging out) DUDE I TOTALLY FORGOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I DID read Cut! But when I was doing this story I wasn't exactly thinking about it until now!!!! Man I feel like such a jerk for forgetting to credit it!!!!!!!! I'll do it right now! THANKS MAN!!!!! (runs off like Speedy Gonzalez)
Note: for you guys who know lots and lots about vampires don't tell me I got everything on vampires wrong here 'cause I already know most is probably inaccurate (did I spell that right?), I'm just breaking a few rules without permission, get it? hm? (looks at silent audience)..................ok......................onto chappy nine!
Chapter Nine: Run Away
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There wasn't much about vampires; Draco only found two books about them. He saw Pansy, Ron and Hermione sitting in a table reading a few books but he chose a table far away from them, one at the back of the library.
He looked through the first book, finding little information about mind control, but he found a lot about anything related to blood.
Half-Vampires can eat both blood and whatever their other side eats. They can also go through the day out in the sun without getting burned, but they CAN get sunburns but that's very rare.
He looked back at the contents and found nothing about Harry's problem; he looked through the other book and read through the contents, he found something that was close to what he was looking for.
Some symptoms for depression is, lack of speech, sudden outbursts, long-term sleep, the rarest one is self torture like cutting, loss of appetite, and forcing themselves to remember harsh memories.
Draco frowned, he read more and learned that half vampires have a mate too, he remembered last night when Dumbledore said that the connection between his and Harry's minds where stronger because they were each others mates, especially since Harry was part vampire.
Someone tapped him on the shoulder. He looked up and faced Madam Pince.
"The library's closing, you'll have to leave," she said.
Draco looked around the library, everyone was walking out of the doors, he left too, the two books with him.
Harry looked at the wall behind Remus, wanting to look at anything but the look on the werewolf's face.
"Harry look at me," Remus said calmly, his voice not matching the worried look on his face.
Harry glanced at him then away.
"I know this has been hard for you, I miss Sirius too, but you can't do this to yourself, it won't bring him back."
He needed to cut, to feel the bliss, to not remember anything.
Remus watched Harry quietly; he kept staring at the wall. That's when he felt a tiny pull in his head, he frowned. "Harry stop trying to control my mind."
The silent boy looked at the white floor, the tugging in Remus's head stopped.
"Please, say something. Everyone's worried about you, how many times do they have to tell you?"
He half wanted to talk, but he'd feel like he'd lose something. He kept staring at the floor. Remus sighed and stood up. "I'll come and visit again as soon as I can."
He left him alone; walking out the door like it was the easiest thing in the world. Harry felt like the empty spot in him had gotten emptier.
"The game's tomorrow," Pansy said, standing behind Draco who was on the sofa, staring into the fire.
"Yeah."
"You've made your decision?"
"I don't know."
"You don't know?"
"Yeah, I don't wanna lose the Quidditch cup for the sixth time, but I also want to help him."
"Whichever side you think is reasonable, choose it. I'm going to bed, 'night."
As soon as she was gone Draco picked up the knife that lay next to him, as he looked at it he wondered if he was doing the right thing.
"You're the weapon!?" Ron shouted, Hermione nudged him to shut up.
"Yeah," Neville said quietly, hoping no one else was hearing.
"So you, Ron, Malfoy and me complete Harry?" Hermione asked, Neville nodded, "no offense, but why you?"
"Mrs. Malfoy said that when I was born my parents put it in me, she says they found nearly a month before I was born."
Ron frowning, "oh well at least we've got the weapon. What IS the weapon though?"
"I don't know much, but Mrs. Malfoy says it's got unlimited courage and power which is just plain fucking odd."
"Courage?" Hermione raised an eyebrow.
"Yeah, I was wondering why I was sorted to Gryffindor since I'm more like a Hufflepuff but Mrs. Malfoy told me it was because of the damn weapon."
"But how come you never showed much courage?"
"Because I had memory problems, and I'm too scared about forgetting things so............yeah."
"You seem to swear a lot now," Ron blinked, Neville rolled his eyes.
"So now what?" Hermione asked.
"I don't know, all Mrs. Malfoy told me to do was to tell Malfoy and you guys, she said the rest was up to Malfoy."
The other two frowned.
"What's wrong?"
"You know, if the accident, or Harry cutting himself or anything happened, we'd think Malfoy would choose not to love Harry," said Hermione slowly.
"And now?"
"We don't know," Ron said, "Malfoy's changed, a lot, it's weird too because today we had a nice time with Pansy, it's like everything we thought was proved wrong."
"The game's tomorrow, what do you think Malfoy's gonna do?"
"Play," muttered Hermione as she sat down on the sofa, "so what if he's changed? With Harry gone, he wins because Parvati's not a very good seeker, Slytherin will finally win."
"What if he doesn't?"
"Then he's a BAD seeker."
"I meant play, what if he chooses not to play?"
"I'll eat my ass."
Ron laughed, "I'll have to take a picture of that."
He finally fell asleep, but Alice still needed to stand by just in case, it was kind of hard because she was slowly falling asleep.
---
He wanted to scream, shout, whisper, anything, anything to show that he was there.
People passed him, ignoring him, not even knowing he was there, he wanted to cry but nothing came out, he was empty, emotionless, unconscious of everything around him.
The only thing he felt that was close to him was to cut, bleed, forget, he needed the bliss, the rush, the happiness, his arms were screaming to get cut.
He wanted to do more, he wanted to leave, not exist, be with his family, leave everything else behind.
Something else screamed to be torn. His heart.
---
Alice yawned, her head slowly lowered but shot back quickly, she kept forcing herself to stay awake, one, because Harry could control her in her sleep, and two, she could get fired.
But he was sleeping soundly, it only made Alice sleepier.
When everyone thought that Harry was doing much better, he was doing worse, falling deeper into the black hole he created inside him.
Draco didn't want to eat anything, he was hungry but something inside him was holding back, making him feel that he'd throw up if he ate anything.
Pansy and Blaise left him alone for the morning; they knew he needed time for himself.
"He's gonna play, you were right 'Mione," said Ron when he saw the Slytherin table all hyper and exited, "this sucks shit!"
"I know, why couldn't you guys ask for another person to play seeker?" Parvati almost whined, "You know fucking well I suck at seeker."
"Who else would have played?"
"Colin!"
"He doesn't know shit about Quidditch; he's not very good at flying a broom either."
"What about um....................oh forget it; we might as well just give the trophy to the Slytherins now."
"Lets at least TRY to win," said Hermione, she looked at her toast but pushed it away, feeling full even though she didn't eat anything.
"There they go," said Ron. Hermione and Parvati looked behind them and saw the whole Slytherin Quidditch team walk out of the Great Hall, Draco leading the way.
"Today's Quidditch game, the Giant Silver Snakes versus the Tiny Little Lions," said Parvati sarcastically as she lazily ate her toast, "We'll be squashed dead."
Hermione frowned at Parvati. "Come on, we'd better go too, Ron go call the others."
They weren't exited, they weren't happy; they were worried about their captain.
As they dressed in their Quidditch uniforms, they half watched Draco, some wanting to know what was wrong, the other half wanting to know if he made his decision.
He knew they were watching him. Draco still didn't know what to do. If he choose to help Harry then what would he do if his idea didn't work? If he played then he could help Harry later, but would he be too late?
"Draco?"
He jumped back into reality; he turned to Blaise who looked at him a little worriedly.
"Is everything ok?"
"Yeah," Draco nodded turning back to tying his boots.
"Liar."
"Why do you say that?"
"I can see it in your eyes."
"No you can't I'm not looking at you."
"You just were. If you don't decide then we'll just cancel the game until you DO decide."
"I already HAVE," he lied.
"And?"
"We'll play; we shouldn't let something that's personal in my life get in the way of this."
Blaise looked at him suspiciously.
"You know," he said frowning, "I wish you'd stop lying."
Draco turned to him but he was walking away to Pansy.
"Parvati just try to do what we did at practice," said Ron.
"What, not see the snitch two feet from my face?"
Ron sighed. "No, I meant the part about actually CATCHING the snitch."
The team picked up their brooms and walked out on to the field, the Slytherin team also coming out too.
Madam Hooch was already at the middle of the field, the chest of the Quidditch balls inside.
"Captains shake hands," she said.
The teams looked at each other, both seeing that the other didn't really want to play.
Ron and Draco faced each other, hands outstretched, they shook hands, weakly.
He looked at the redheaded boy. After all this time Draco thought Hermione was more worried about Harry. Now as he looked into Ron's face he saw something he neglected to notice, Ron looked older, tired, Draco looked at the rest of the Gryffindor team and saw almost the same comparison, but it seemed more noticeable on the Gryffindor captain.
The audience seemed more quiet than usual, even though they were cheering their team happily, but he didn't hear Hagrid's loud booming voice, even Padma's magnefied voice sounded a bit depressed.
Madam Hooch opened the trunk and made to free the bludgers.
"Stop."
She looked up at Draco confused.
"I can't do this," he took a step back, everyone watched him confused, Pansy and Blaise gave him a small smile.
"What are you-" but before Seamus could finish Draco ran away.
'I have to help him,' was all Draco could think of as he ran through the locker room, out of Quidditch arena, he jumped on his broom and flew straight to the window that lead to the hall to the Slytherin dungeons.
Did I spell Magnefied wrong?
Somehow...................I feel like it was obvious he'd do that..............or is it just me? Oh well..............Review please!!!