Black Phoenix: Hi! Welcome to The Stupid Show with Black Phoenix! Here, we have Dante Sparda of Devil May Cry to answer questions you have asked! Yes, I write the questions, letters, and what not as they appear in the Review page.
Dante: Okay, who's first?
Black Phoenix: Erm...Stuzak.
Dante: *waves his hand to continue* Shoot.
Black Phoenix: Okay.
ohh, i have many many questions:
1: Is your hair natural or do you bleach it?
2: whats the deal with alistor? Say a normal human touched the handle, would they be fried?
3: same question as a bove except with ifrit.
4: how come your clothes never seemed to get ripped apart? ive seen you rise through swords, get cut by sharp blades, and have big red spikes through you.
5: where can i get these super-clothes that never get ripped?
6:which is your song of these 3:
Europe - The final countdown
Phil Collins - Another day in paradise
Bonjovi - Its my life
What character would you most likely team up with from other games/movies?
Tidus from FF10
Tifa from FF7
Squall from FF8
An alien from the Aliens Trilogy (its half 1 in the morning i can't think of any better ones)
The Terminator
Max Payne
Ok ive said enough. im tired and i need sleep.
I look forward to seeing your reply.
Dante: DAANG! That's a lot! Okay...here goes nothing...
1. Natural! LOOK AT MY EYEBROWS!! *points at his eyebrows*
2. Alastor...Possibly.
3. Most likely...look at the flames!
4. My clothes are made from special material made by my mommy, Eva!
5. Try the What-The-Hell Mall down in Hell! Take a left and Candy Eye Candy Store, take a right at Jeeper's Creeper's Peepers, then walk straight down the hallway until you see a store called Fiery Fitting Clothes Outlet. And you're there!
6. Europe- The Final Countdown
7. Tifa! Hell yeah, she's one hot chick! I don't like guys as partners, they end up becoming yaoi pairings in fanfics. YECK! p
Good night!
Black Phoenix: Not bad, Dante!
Dante: Heh-heh.
Black Phoenix: Next is from Silver Sparrow.
Can I have your trench coat? x_X Or if not, can I get into yer' pants? XD
Dante: No, you can't have my trench coat and...WHAT?!?! O_O
Black Phoenix: Silver Sparrow wants to get into your pants...
Dante: Erm...Ummm *sweats* O_O;;;; Do I HAVE to answer this?!?!
Black Phoenix: Yep.
Dante: Dammit! I...uhh...Lemme think about that....
Black Phoenix: Yeah, while you do, here's your next question from OrangeGirlExplosion
What do you think of your new partner, Lucia?
Dante: She looks weird. That's all I have to say.
Black Phoenix: That's...all?
Dante: Yep.
Black Phoenix: Ahhh...Now that second question...
Dante: DAAAHHH!! I can't take this anymore! I'm gonna go knit more scarves! *leaves, slams door, motorcycle wheels can be heard*
Black Phoenix: DAAANNNTTEEEE!!!! COOMMEE BAAACCCKKK!!!
Dante: *revs back* Okay!
Black Phoenix: Good! Next question's from DysfunctionalDoll
1. Boxers or briefs?
2. Did you really kill Vergil, or did his demonic form just die?
3. If he is alive...COULD YOU HOOK ME UP WITH HIM PLEASE? ^^
4. Were you and Trish a couple?
5. What in the bloody hell happened to her?
6. WHY DID CAPCOM FUCKING CHANGE YOUR VOICE? ;_;
7. Along with my other question...if Vergil is dead, can I hook up with you, or would Lucia get mad? ^^ I LOVE YOU DANTE ^^
8. WHERE THE FUCK CAN I GET A DAMN PLUSHIE OF YOU? .
Dante: Well...
1. Boxers. More comfy.
2. Nope, didn't kill my brother, just his stunt double.
3. SURE! Here's his number. Really! 1-800-452-5277...Or 1-800-KIC-KASS.
4. Nope. Not exactly. Y'see, she's a reincarnated form of my mommy, so nope. Nothing but partners.
5. Got kidnapped. Agh, who cares? Maybe all the Trish lovers.
6. Actually, since I was sick when we recorded Devil May Cry, they had someone do a voice over for me. Did a pretty good job, that Bobby. Well, now that I'm not sick anymore, Nelo killed him for fun. But just to fit it in, they got a new voice over for me. Poor guy.
7. Virgil's not dead, just his stunt double. Nah, Lucia won't mind. She don't even like me anyways. One date's good enough for me...*looks at Black Phoenix's angry look* OR not...
8. Hmm...I dunno, but I'll send you a pic of one. Just give me your e-mail address and I'll send you a picture of a Plushie me and the link of the guy who made it!
Black Phoenix: *with a slightly angry look* Okay... Next is from Amail.
Since I love these sections and hate some of the loopy questions people asked, I wanted to ask things I'm sure you would want to actually answer.
1. Is Nelo Angelo your brother Virgil or was he just a copy(clone) made by Mundus?
2. Any idea how Mundus made Trish look like your mom? That was sort of cool, but really creepy.
3. Do you ever hunt monsters besides demons and ghosts? Have you ever had to go up against something crazy like a dragon, phoenix, griffin(not counting that nitwit from your game), kelpi, or harpy? I apologize if you don't know what those monsters are. I just read some fantasy books with those monsters and starting write weird stories with them included. But, you can find them in any encyclopedias.
4. What do you think of Zan from the game Rising Zan? He seems to have copied your style of fighting, but looks crazy doing it.
5. How many games would you like to see in your series?
6. Really, what do you think of women and how do they treat you? You must have beat off fan girls with your sword constantly. And, being a female, I actually find women do act crazy and think they do this just to upset men. They make the female sex look weird and totally beyond understanding.
7. I'm working on a fanfic where you pass off your business and weapons to your oldest son, one of four kids you have maybe two or three hundred years down the line. His name is Draco, like that dragon head on Alastor, and he's trying to help a family destroy these crazy twins that carry giant scissors for weapons. The twins are Scissormen featured in the Clock Tower series for Snes and Playstation, and have weird abilities like teleporting around when chasing someone and having strong influence on people with evil obsessions.
How would you try to defeat two stupid nine-year-olds that wore ugly masks and tired to get you with giant scissors, while laughing like a couple of evil schoolgirls? Really, I'm serious, I've been playing this game for inspirationbut don't see how you would defeat them.
8. Will you PLEASE keep the name Devil May Cry? Devil Never Cry sounds a little weird for your business when we all know you make the devils cry. And, why did Trish make such a weird suggestion?
Thanks, Dante
And, watch out for those fanfics where they have you up against Voldemort from Harry Potter or Lord Sauron from Lord of the Rings. You know somebody going to use those ideas one of these days.
Dante: WHAO! I don't think I can answer all that! Maybe I can...lemme see...
1. Yes, he's my brother Virgil...Mundus probably took his DEAD body, reincarnated him, and made him into the demon he is.
2. No clue. Maybe Mundus used a pic of my mom for reference...freaky, I know.
3. I can't hunt phoenixes, they revive eventually, but I'll try. I tried to hunt a griffin, but instead the griffin hunted me...'cause I had cookies it wanted...
4. Cheap ass. Use MY moves and use them as his own?! Copy-cat...He's a freak I say...
5. LOTS! But not too many so that people would get tired of seeing my sexy ass. I mean, look at Mario from Nintendo! He's been around longer than Black Phoenix here and he's STILL famous!
6. Damn groupies...Yes, I keep 'em back with Alastor...Hehe...They're in hell now...WHOOPS! Women are good, but I don't like wimpy girls that make guys fight for them, work for them, and all that crap. At least they should stand up for themselves and NOT scream like a WHINY HELPLESS girl! The only girls in MY life that have treated me good are Mom/Trish and Black Phoenix. Well....I take that last one back... She ignores me 'cause I ignore her...but she could take care of herself. She knows Taekwon Do...
7. Wow, can't wait to read it. I hate scissors, they cut off my beautiful locks of white hair. Twins with freakish masks and giant scissors you say? *cracks knuckles* What the hell...I'll send them to hell. Just asking, who did I bang?
8. Sure, Devil Never Cry sounds weird, too. I'm good at making devils cry...Trish must've been on something. I don't know.
Dante: And I'll watch for those fics...I can their asses anytime.
Black Phoenix: Well, you survived that one. Next letter's from Kar-chan
Hay Dante! You have the coolest name. Did you know that Sir Paul Macarthy made a song with the same name as your guns? It's called 'Ebony and Ivory'. Seriously!
Dante: I know I have a cool name! *beams* Yes, I know that song. Good one. And it's not Sir Paul "Macarthy", it's Sir Paul "McCartney". Former Beatle. Black Phoenix here used to know that song by heart...until her uncle lost the Paul McCartney CD at work...
Black Phoenix: Yep. Next one's from sonflour.
Ummm...do you ever plan on getting married
What happened to Trish in the second Devil may Cry
What's up with you and romance...
Dante: Do I ever plan on getting married?
Black Phoenix: *holds up a Gamers Bridal Magazine*
Dante: Nope.
Black Phoenix: *lowers the magazine sadly*
Dante: Trish got kidnapped...At least that's what the director told me. And romance...not exactly against it. For some reason, with some writers, horror, action, angst, and adventure HAVE to have romance in it...Weird, eh?
Black Phoenix: Next is from...futuresuperstar...
Ooo,yay! I need a few questions answered, Dante.
1-Which do you like better? Alastor, Force Edge, Sparda, or Ifrit
2-Which do you like better? Ebony and Ivory, Shotgun, Grenade Gun, Nightmare Beta, or Neddlegun?
3-Ever thought of being in a tag team fighting game and partnering up with Solid Snake?
4-Who's harder? Griffon, Phantom, Nelo Angelo, Nightmare, or Mundus?
5-Who smells worse, sin scissors or sin scythe?
6-What would you do if you met Britney Spears?
7-Can I have your autograph?
8-How do you get infinite ammo in you firearms? Did you borrow Snake's bandanna?
9-Could you please read my 2 fics? Devil May Cry: The Lurking Evil and Metal Gear Solid 3: The Missing Patriot?
10-Who's your favorite singer?
11-Could you please turn on the creator of this fic for making me crazy and asking a fake person stupid questions?
Thanks for your time, Dante.
p.s.-Kill trish, she looks like a bum.
Dante: Aha...
1. I dunno, I like 'em all. Different purposes.
2. Ebony and Ivory! They're my life's work into making guns!
3. Yeah! We could kick ass!
4. Hrm...Griffon-Nope. Phantom-Nope. Nelo Angelo-Gave me a wedgie when we were kids. Nightmare-Now I'm scared of Jell-O...and Bill Cosby since he's associated with Jell-O. Mundus-He's a freak...So it's Nightmare.
5. Hrm...I would say sin scythe. Since scissors are no way better than scythes, the sin sythes have gotta have a stonger smell...eww...
6. Hmm...not ask for her autograph...maybe pick my nose in front of her...
7. Sure! *writes on a paper pad* [It says: Dante Wuz Here]
8. Snake's bandanna is sweaty...Easy, I scare the hell out of the weapon shop owner, so he gives me unlimited ammo...for free! XD
9. Sure, if I have enough time. I'm a very busy man, you know.
10. I like Linkin Park.
11. Uhhh... *blush*
Dante: Killing Trish would be bad. She looks like my mom.
Black Phoenix: Okay. Last one is from my cousin, kraP nikniL...nice way to write Linkin Park!
Hi, insan (short cut for pinsan) I want to know more about dante. pls update me, thanks...
Black Phoenix: No problem! Dante is half-human, half-demon. His father's the Legendary Dark Night Sparda. He owns a business called Devil May Cry and he made Ebony and Ivory; his twin pistols. He could turn into a devil, and I know a code for Dante to pee on the wall. Hehe...
Dante: WHAT?!?!
Black Phoenix: Yep. Well, that's it for now! Send 'em reviews in and we'll answer! Now Dante...about that question from Silver Sparrow...
Dante: She can't have my coat!
Black Phoenix: Not that one! The other one!
Dante: Oooohhh...THAT one...Umm...Whoops gotta go! *door slams, motorcycle revving and tires screeching away can be heard*
Black Phoenix: Hm...well, till next time...Ja ne!
Dante: Okay, who's first?
Black Phoenix: Erm...Stuzak.
Dante: *waves his hand to continue* Shoot.
Black Phoenix: Okay.
ohh, i have many many questions:
1: Is your hair natural or do you bleach it?
2: whats the deal with alistor? Say a normal human touched the handle, would they be fried?
3: same question as a bove except with ifrit.
4: how come your clothes never seemed to get ripped apart? ive seen you rise through swords, get cut by sharp blades, and have big red spikes through you.
5: where can i get these super-clothes that never get ripped?
6:which is your song of these 3:
Europe - The final countdown
Phil Collins - Another day in paradise
Bonjovi - Its my life
What character would you most likely team up with from other games/movies?
Tidus from FF10
Tifa from FF7
Squall from FF8
An alien from the Aliens Trilogy (its half 1 in the morning i can't think of any better ones)
The Terminator
Max Payne
Ok ive said enough. im tired and i need sleep.
I look forward to seeing your reply.
Dante: DAANG! That's a lot! Okay...here goes nothing...
1. Natural! LOOK AT MY EYEBROWS!! *points at his eyebrows*
2. Alastor...Possibly.
3. Most likely...look at the flames!
4. My clothes are made from special material made by my mommy, Eva!
5. Try the What-The-Hell Mall down in Hell! Take a left and Candy Eye Candy Store, take a right at Jeeper's Creeper's Peepers, then walk straight down the hallway until you see a store called Fiery Fitting Clothes Outlet. And you're there!
6. Europe- The Final Countdown
7. Tifa! Hell yeah, she's one hot chick! I don't like guys as partners, they end up becoming yaoi pairings in fanfics. YECK! p
Good night!
Black Phoenix: Not bad, Dante!
Dante: Heh-heh.
Black Phoenix: Next is from Silver Sparrow.
Can I have your trench coat? x_X Or if not, can I get into yer' pants? XD
Dante: No, you can't have my trench coat and...WHAT?!?! O_O
Black Phoenix: Silver Sparrow wants to get into your pants...
Dante: Erm...Ummm *sweats* O_O;;;; Do I HAVE to answer this?!?!
Black Phoenix: Yep.
Dante: Dammit! I...uhh...Lemme think about that....
Black Phoenix: Yeah, while you do, here's your next question from OrangeGirlExplosion
What do you think of your new partner, Lucia?
Dante: She looks weird. That's all I have to say.
Black Phoenix: That's...all?
Dante: Yep.
Black Phoenix: Ahhh...Now that second question...
Dante: DAAAHHH!! I can't take this anymore! I'm gonna go knit more scarves! *leaves, slams door, motorcycle wheels can be heard*
Black Phoenix: DAAANNNTTEEEE!!!! COOMMEE BAAACCCKKK!!!
Dante: *revs back* Okay!
Black Phoenix: Good! Next question's from DysfunctionalDoll
1. Boxers or briefs?
2. Did you really kill Vergil, or did his demonic form just die?
3. If he is alive...COULD YOU HOOK ME UP WITH HIM PLEASE? ^^
4. Were you and Trish a couple?
5. What in the bloody hell happened to her?
6. WHY DID CAPCOM FUCKING CHANGE YOUR VOICE? ;_;
7. Along with my other question...if Vergil is dead, can I hook up with you, or would Lucia get mad? ^^ I LOVE YOU DANTE ^^
8. WHERE THE FUCK CAN I GET A DAMN PLUSHIE OF YOU? .
Dante: Well...
1. Boxers. More comfy.
2. Nope, didn't kill my brother, just his stunt double.
3. SURE! Here's his number. Really! 1-800-452-5277...Or 1-800-KIC-KASS.
4. Nope. Not exactly. Y'see, she's a reincarnated form of my mommy, so nope. Nothing but partners.
5. Got kidnapped. Agh, who cares? Maybe all the Trish lovers.
6. Actually, since I was sick when we recorded Devil May Cry, they had someone do a voice over for me. Did a pretty good job, that Bobby. Well, now that I'm not sick anymore, Nelo killed him for fun. But just to fit it in, they got a new voice over for me. Poor guy.
7. Virgil's not dead, just his stunt double. Nah, Lucia won't mind. She don't even like me anyways. One date's good enough for me...*looks at Black Phoenix's angry look* OR not...
8. Hmm...I dunno, but I'll send you a pic of one. Just give me your e-mail address and I'll send you a picture of a Plushie me and the link of the guy who made it!
Black Phoenix: *with a slightly angry look* Okay... Next is from Amail.
Since I love these sections and hate some of the loopy questions people asked, I wanted to ask things I'm sure you would want to actually answer.
1. Is Nelo Angelo your brother Virgil or was he just a copy(clone) made by Mundus?
2. Any idea how Mundus made Trish look like your mom? That was sort of cool, but really creepy.
3. Do you ever hunt monsters besides demons and ghosts? Have you ever had to go up against something crazy like a dragon, phoenix, griffin(not counting that nitwit from your game), kelpi, or harpy? I apologize if you don't know what those monsters are. I just read some fantasy books with those monsters and starting write weird stories with them included. But, you can find them in any encyclopedias.
4. What do you think of Zan from the game Rising Zan? He seems to have copied your style of fighting, but looks crazy doing it.
5. How many games would you like to see in your series?
6. Really, what do you think of women and how do they treat you? You must have beat off fan girls with your sword constantly. And, being a female, I actually find women do act crazy and think they do this just to upset men. They make the female sex look weird and totally beyond understanding.
7. I'm working on a fanfic where you pass off your business and weapons to your oldest son, one of four kids you have maybe two or three hundred years down the line. His name is Draco, like that dragon head on Alastor, and he's trying to help a family destroy these crazy twins that carry giant scissors for weapons. The twins are Scissormen featured in the Clock Tower series for Snes and Playstation, and have weird abilities like teleporting around when chasing someone and having strong influence on people with evil obsessions.
How would you try to defeat two stupid nine-year-olds that wore ugly masks and tired to get you with giant scissors, while laughing like a couple of evil schoolgirls? Really, I'm serious, I've been playing this game for inspirationbut don't see how you would defeat them.
8. Will you PLEASE keep the name Devil May Cry? Devil Never Cry sounds a little weird for your business when we all know you make the devils cry. And, why did Trish make such a weird suggestion?
Thanks, Dante
And, watch out for those fanfics where they have you up against Voldemort from Harry Potter or Lord Sauron from Lord of the Rings. You know somebody going to use those ideas one of these days.
Dante: WHAO! I don't think I can answer all that! Maybe I can...lemme see...
1. Yes, he's my brother Virgil...Mundus probably took his DEAD body, reincarnated him, and made him into the demon he is.
2. No clue. Maybe Mundus used a pic of my mom for reference...freaky, I know.
3. I can't hunt phoenixes, they revive eventually, but I'll try. I tried to hunt a griffin, but instead the griffin hunted me...'cause I had cookies it wanted...
4. Cheap ass. Use MY moves and use them as his own?! Copy-cat...He's a freak I say...
5. LOTS! But not too many so that people would get tired of seeing my sexy ass. I mean, look at Mario from Nintendo! He's been around longer than Black Phoenix here and he's STILL famous!
6. Damn groupies...Yes, I keep 'em back with Alastor...Hehe...They're in hell now...WHOOPS! Women are good, but I don't like wimpy girls that make guys fight for them, work for them, and all that crap. At least they should stand up for themselves and NOT scream like a WHINY HELPLESS girl! The only girls in MY life that have treated me good are Mom/Trish and Black Phoenix. Well....I take that last one back... She ignores me 'cause I ignore her...but she could take care of herself. She knows Taekwon Do...
7. Wow, can't wait to read it. I hate scissors, they cut off my beautiful locks of white hair. Twins with freakish masks and giant scissors you say? *cracks knuckles* What the hell...I'll send them to hell. Just asking, who did I bang?
8. Sure, Devil Never Cry sounds weird, too. I'm good at making devils cry...Trish must've been on something. I don't know.
Dante: And I'll watch for those fics...I can their asses anytime.
Black Phoenix: Well, you survived that one. Next letter's from Kar-chan
Hay Dante! You have the coolest name. Did you know that Sir Paul Macarthy made a song with the same name as your guns? It's called 'Ebony and Ivory'. Seriously!
Dante: I know I have a cool name! *beams* Yes, I know that song. Good one. And it's not Sir Paul "Macarthy", it's Sir Paul "McCartney". Former Beatle. Black Phoenix here used to know that song by heart...until her uncle lost the Paul McCartney CD at work...
Black Phoenix: Yep. Next one's from sonflour.
Ummm...do you ever plan on getting married
What happened to Trish in the second Devil may Cry
What's up with you and romance...
Dante: Do I ever plan on getting married?
Black Phoenix: *holds up a Gamers Bridal Magazine*
Dante: Nope.
Black Phoenix: *lowers the magazine sadly*
Dante: Trish got kidnapped...At least that's what the director told me. And romance...not exactly against it. For some reason, with some writers, horror, action, angst, and adventure HAVE to have romance in it...Weird, eh?
Black Phoenix: Next is from...futuresuperstar...
Ooo,yay! I need a few questions answered, Dante.
1-Which do you like better? Alastor, Force Edge, Sparda, or Ifrit
2-Which do you like better? Ebony and Ivory, Shotgun, Grenade Gun, Nightmare Beta, or Neddlegun?
3-Ever thought of being in a tag team fighting game and partnering up with Solid Snake?
4-Who's harder? Griffon, Phantom, Nelo Angelo, Nightmare, or Mundus?
5-Who smells worse, sin scissors or sin scythe?
6-What would you do if you met Britney Spears?
7-Can I have your autograph?
8-How do you get infinite ammo in you firearms? Did you borrow Snake's bandanna?
9-Could you please read my 2 fics? Devil May Cry: The Lurking Evil and Metal Gear Solid 3: The Missing Patriot?
10-Who's your favorite singer?
11-Could you please turn on the creator of this fic for making me crazy and asking a fake person stupid questions?
Thanks for your time, Dante.
p.s.-Kill trish, she looks like a bum.
Dante: Aha...
1. I dunno, I like 'em all. Different purposes.
2. Ebony and Ivory! They're my life's work into making guns!
3. Yeah! We could kick ass!
4. Hrm...Griffon-Nope. Phantom-Nope. Nelo Angelo-Gave me a wedgie when we were kids. Nightmare-Now I'm scared of Jell-O...and Bill Cosby since he's associated with Jell-O. Mundus-He's a freak...So it's Nightmare.
5. Hrm...I would say sin scythe. Since scissors are no way better than scythes, the sin sythes have gotta have a stonger smell...eww...
6. Hmm...not ask for her autograph...maybe pick my nose in front of her...
7. Sure! *writes on a paper pad* [It says: Dante Wuz Here]
8. Snake's bandanna is sweaty...Easy, I scare the hell out of the weapon shop owner, so he gives me unlimited ammo...for free! XD
9. Sure, if I have enough time. I'm a very busy man, you know.
10. I like Linkin Park.
11. Uhhh... *blush*
Dante: Killing Trish would be bad. She looks like my mom.
Black Phoenix: Okay. Last one is from my cousin, kraP nikniL...nice way to write Linkin Park!
Hi, insan (short cut for pinsan) I want to know more about dante. pls update me, thanks...
Black Phoenix: No problem! Dante is half-human, half-demon. His father's the Legendary Dark Night Sparda. He owns a business called Devil May Cry and he made Ebony and Ivory; his twin pistols. He could turn into a devil, and I know a code for Dante to pee on the wall. Hehe...
Dante: WHAT?!?!
Black Phoenix: Yep. Well, that's it for now! Send 'em reviews in and we'll answer! Now Dante...about that question from Silver Sparrow...
Dante: She can't have my coat!
Black Phoenix: Not that one! The other one!
Dante: Oooohhh...THAT one...Umm...Whoops gotta go! *door slams, motorcycle revving and tires screeching away can be heard*
Black Phoenix: Hm...well, till next time...Ja ne!