BLUE WASTELAND
A Kim Possible Fan Fiction
Oddity
By Psychedelic Leviathan
and the fighting Jesus
(KP is owned by Disney.)
a/n: I
just hate it when my eye tries to jump out of my head.
Kim Possible was entering
another day of despondency and depression. She store up at the ceiling
vacantly, wondering if she was going to die soon. Well like hoping she would
die soon. Life without Ron was far too empty for her to survive in. Drakken helped but he wasn't around very often. She knew
well what had happened, he had fallen prey to the cult of bodybuilding. And
from the information she had been given about his new 'friends' she knew that
his fall had been completely over the edge.
He was almost gone right now.
Kim could look over to see Drakken wrapping his
lifting belt around his waist. He was dressed in the HELL'S GYM tank top and a
pair of lousy shorts.
"HAHA!"
Drakken exulted. "Soon those
pathetic weights WILL FEEL MY WRATH!"
"Leaving me again?"
"Kim I have work to do. The only way I'll ever be able to fight
evil...and look totally badass...its through the
program Mister Jackson has me on."
"Any
relation to Michael Jackson?"
"God no. Irving
is definitely black. And Michael...well he WAS but not anymore."
"Well that's a small
relief."
"Kim I'd love to stay and
chat, but I need to go to Hell ASAP."
"Drakken, why exactly do they call
it HELL'S gym?"
"Well the name is
sort a parody of the famous Gold's Gym and that Christian t-shirt Lord's Gym,
you know the one where Jesus is shown bench pressing the sin of the world. So yeah."
"That doesn't make
a lot of sense."
"I think it's cause of the members. There're all...well...really
evil. Except Irv, he's the son of a Justice
Legionnaire so he can't be evil."
"Who are these
members?"
"The
scum of the Earth. At least that's how the gym owner likes to sum them
up and they like to be thought of."
"People
who LIKE being called the scum of the Earth. That actually does help me
understand this place. So basically these are a bunch of lowlifes who have an
interest in Speedo men? And steroids?"
"Or who ARE Speedo
men." Drakken said. "As for steroids I'm gonna go with yes too."
There was a loud knocking at
the door. Drakken opened it and in stepped an
enormously tall and bulky black man. He wore glasses and an outfit that was
almost the same as Drakken except for the fact that
he wore a Forty Niner hat. The man was completely
immense, to the point that even Kim Possible was somewhat impressed. He
extended one tree trunk of an arm towards Drakken.
"Hey Kim, this is Irv. The guy who's teaching me everything he knows." Drakken said shaking his mentor's hand.
"You didn't tell me you
had a girl here Doctor Drakken." Irv smiled. "You old dog you." He smirked at Drakken. "She looks kinda familar to me though."
"She should." Drakken told him. "Because she's been on TV even more
then I have. This is Kim Possible my good brother."
Irv
adjusted his glasses to confirm this sight. And this orange haired girl laying limply on the couch matched his mental check.
"Wow. Is that really you?"
He asked her.
"Yes." She smiled. "The one and only."
"I've always been a big
fan of your work. You've been beating this guy for years."
"Well we're not in
competition anymore. We've had a new understanding. Hey Drakken
said your dad was in the Justice Legion. That true?"
"Uh huh.
He was there on the day the sun didn't come up." Irv
said with a kind of proud boredom. "Well we'd better get going. We got
stuff to do."
Drakken
gestured for his immense friend to leave and he did after giving a nod to Kim.
She was left there alone. Kim wondered if she had lost another person. Drakken was still kind of there, but only at night and in
the morning now. She felt a kind of now matter of fact loniless.
Ron was gone, her family was gone, Drakken
was slowly leaving in her opinion. But then Drakken
was a man, shouldn't he want to be around his man friends like the tall guy?
But she didn't trust Drakken's word. Even if he had been around to care for her
that didn't erase the fact that he had repeatedly tried to kill her in the
past. She didn't believe that Drakken was going to
stick around in her life. He was going to become one of the meatheads in that
steroid gym. Drakken was the perfect target for the
cult of bodybuilding, he was insecure and had come out
of a childhood where he had been ritually abused by the other children. If he could get security through this insanity then good for him.
Kim told herself a couple of those rationalizations. She knew Drakken had a right to improve himself and this was
probably as much as he could do so. He wasn't very smart, his various attempted
evil plans had attested to that. And as Brick Flagg
showed it was better to be big and dumb then it would be to be weak and dumb.
But she still couldn't help but
feel that Drakken was leaving her. This thought
sucked air from Kim's lungs. Being rejected by DRAKKEN? Now that would be truly
pathetic. It would be the crowning jewel in her downward spiral from greatness
to the stygian gulfs of loserdom. She was glad Shego didn't know of this, for the black haired vixen would
surely rub it in her face. Shego had dumped Drakken. Drakken had picked her
up and was now going to dump her from a bunch of sweaty men in some dank pit
that was a likened to the underworld.
Sure Drakken
had never SAID anything or INDICATED anything...but Kim knew he was going to do
something. Ron had died and her family had gone insane. It was only natural
that Drakken would leave right after he became a decent
person.
"Your
getting paranoid Kimmy." She told herself aloud.
"And crazy too, if your talking to yourself." She then tried to roll
over and fell on the carpet in the process. "And doomed
too. Can't even take care of myself." She
pushed her upper body off the floor grabbed at the couch,
she was going to pull herself back on top of it. But then she decided she
didn't want to lay on that damn couch for yet another crippled day. Even if she
couldn't walk, she had to do SOMETHING or she'd go insane.
Kim saw her backpack across the
room. She hadn't opened it since she'd come to Drakken's
back up lair. Kim pulled herself across the floor and over the backpack,
dragging her pair of leg casts as she did. She opened up the thing,
all there was were some clothes, an address book, an empty journal and a cell
phone.
Kim checked to see if the cell
phone was still working. Strangely enough it was, the sound of dial tone
becoming oddly comforting to her. She could contact people. That was an
exciting idea, especially being marooned with Drakken
for so long.
But who would she call?
Her parents were not an option.
They had call tracing and could find her fairly easily if she called home.
There was no way she was going home now, not after they had decided not to let
her fight crime anymore out of terror for her well being. She thought of Wade,
but she had no idea what his phone number was. They had always communicated via
computers. She thought of Ron...and that produced another unpleasant reaction.
Some things just could not be accepted regardless of time. Some hurts just went
too deep.
She looked further down her
list of contacts. The other cheerleaders? No they'd
never understand her situation. Josh Mankey? No, he'd
tell her parents about what was happening. Brick Flagg? Even dumber then most of
the cheerleaders. Bonnie? She was really mean and would probably have
some sick remark about the whole thing.
But Bonnie was actually pretty
smart. And she had no conscience or sense of responsibility, so she likely
wouldn't tell Kim's parents.
Bonnie Rockawaller?
Yes. It would be Bon Bon.
Kim dialed in the number for
her former enemy. This if anything would make her day less boring. Even after
all she had suffered recently Kim felt nervous leaning on her former enemy for
help.
Kim then tried to tell herself
that such a thing was false. She wasn't trying to get help. She just needed
something to talk too that wasn't the wall. Yeah that was it. And besides,
Bonnie was pretty harmless compared to Drakken right?
And she was around blue boy all the time.
Yeah right. Bonnie was much
more dangerous then Drakken. At least in Kim's mind.
Kim picked up her cell phone and nervously called Middleton and the overly
tanned cheerleader.
"Hello?" A somewhat
harsh girl's voice asked over the phone.
"Hi
Bonnie. Do you have any time to talk?"
"KIM?" Bonnie blurted
out in surprise and confusion. "OHMIGAWD...is that really you?"
"Yes BON BON...its me."
"Well you didn't have to
insult me right as soon as we start talking."
"Are you really offended?
Or do you just want to trade insults. I have time to kill so either is
perfectly okay with me."
"Well sorry for having
some concern for your WELFARE...KIMMY." She sneered.
"You really care? Is this
some kind of a trick?"
"Okay now I really am
insulted. I may have not liked you but didn't want you to be dead." Bonnie
became less hostile in tone. "We were all really worried."
"You were?"
"Yeah
when you didn't come home. Your parents were really upset."
"God I don't think I want
to know about they've taken this."
"Kim where did you go?
Everyone's worried about you. They said you were really hurt...are you being
held hostage by some villain or something?"
"Kind of like that."
"Kim where are you? I can
tell someone! We can bring you back home!"
"Bonnie? Are you
okay?"
"No! Middleton's falling
apart! You've got to come home!"
"What's happening?"
"Those crazy villain
people used their death ray thing on us! There're destroying everything!"
"Bonnie
slow down. Your speaking too fast."
"Kim I'm SCARED. Middleton
is a really scary place now. A bunch of those green people came through town
looking for you! They burned down half of the city!"
"Green
people?"
"A bunch of men in these
green and black suits. And this crazy woman who was
wearing the same type of clothes. They burned everything down and anyone
who knew you...they tried to get information out of. Kim..."
"Bonnie?"
There was some whimpering on
the other end of the line. Kim's instincts to help others activated. She asked
the other girl if she was there another time.
"Bonnie?" She asked.
"Kim those green freaks
hurt me."
"Do you want to talk to me
about it?"
"No I don't. Just stop
them. Now." Bonnie moaned weakly.
"Bonnie I can't."
"You have too. No one else
can. The soldiers shoot the green men but they get back up and keep going. We
need someone special. Who has skills or whatever it is that let you beat all of
those freaks before."
"You think...I'm
special?"
"Well duh. Why do you
think I hated you so much? Because you were better everyone else, even
me." Bonnie paused. "Is that the admission you want from me? Or you
want to break Bon Bon down further before Kim
Possible comes and saves the day."
"Bonnie
your forgetting one thing. I'm hurt. Both my legs got broken by Shego and those psychopathic morons that work for her. I
can't even walk. Right now I'm on my back, hoping to get it together to pull
myself to the kitchen later for food."
"Oh. I forgot. Its just so hard to imagine you as hurt."
"Well I am. And you'll be
happy to know that it's been the most humiliating period of my life. I have to
rely on Drakken for everything."
"The
blue guy?"
"Yeah that's
him."
"I thought he was your
enemy or something."
"He was. But Shego dumped him for being so bad at being evil and that
inspired him to quit his old evil life. At least I think that's what changed
his mind."
"So your
hanging out with the blue guy?"
"Well not really so much
anymore. Now he's only around to feed me and whatnot. He's training himself to
become a meathead. I guess so he can fight evil or something. Yeah, he's trying
to save the world now. I guess he figures that someone needs to fill the void
that my being hurt created."
"Someone does! Is he any
good at being good?"
"Well actually he is. But
it would hard to be worse then he was at being a villain. He has this armored
suit thing that can fly and has a bunch of weapons on it. I don't really know
any specifics about his hero thing past that."
"Well can he save
us?"
"I don't think he's ready
for that. And with Drakken I'm not sure if he'll ever
be."
"Then I can hide out with
you? Please? Its getting too scary here. The goons are
beating people up and burning things and at night they throw the dead people in
the river."
"Bonnie...we're pretty far
from Middleton."
"I don't care. I can
drive. Or steal a car. Or hijack a bus. Whatever."
"Okay. But I don't know if
Drakken wants more company. And it is his lair house
thing."
"Well can't you tell him?
Come on Kim I'm...well not your friend. But I do know you. Please Kim I'm alone
and afraid."
"I'll do it."
"Oh thanks Kim!"
"We're in Hell, New
Mexico. Yes that is the real name of the town.
Apparently the town founders weren't very enthusiastic about this place
either."
"Well whatever. I'm sure I
can get some directions from somebody in that state."
"Okay Bonnie. But be
careful. Its a long drive. I don't need yet another
person in life getting hurt, even if it is you."
"Thanks for the love
Kim." She said sarcastically.
"Oh any time Bon Bon."
"But thanks anyways. I'll
see you soon. Bye."
Kim wondered why she had done
that. Pure pity probably. She wondered if Drakken
would be pissed off at her? It seemed unlikely. Since
she had become hurt Drakken had been completely nice
to her. And he wasn't around a lot either, him spending more of more of his
time in that bizarre building filled with psychopathic freaks.
Kim pulled herself back on the
couch and went back to sleep. She was tired of being conscious for now. Though she vowed to wake up in a couple of hours to try to feed
herself. The key word there being 'try', Kim had yesterday made the
crawl to the kitchen and even gotten the refrigerator open, but she had wound
up pulling one of the trays down in the process of trying to get some food. Kim
had gotten nothing out of it, successful only in creating a mess on the floor.
Kim went back to the couch and
wished to be unconscious, so that some of the boredom could not avoided. Not being able to move was a terrible thing indeed.
There was nothing she could do on her own. She wished that Drakken
could come back in order to care her to the bathroom. God this was humiliating.
"I wish I could jump off
that cliff right about now." She sighed despondently. She wondered if
things would have been different if she had let Drakken
jump. This impulse ignored her usual sense of goodness entirely. Did good even exist in a world gone to the psychotics? Did evil
exist anymore either? She didn't think so. Both good and evil had died along
with sanity when the villains began to gather their strength and dominate the
surface of the Earth.
Soon the only thing that would
exist would be what they said. Unless someone could stop
them, which didn't seem possible at all. Kim had by virtue of her name
never believed in the impossible, but she had no idea as to how this alliance
of the evil could be halted. Who was standing in their way at all? The conventional military forces that could only slow the super
henchmen? Doctor Drakken and his war Armour? Her with two broken legs and a
number of other fractures throughout her body?
And once the villains took over
only worse things would come to be. Obviously they wouldn't be able to share. Shego was supposedly the leader but no villain ever got
into their present position by listening to others. Their
would be rebellion against Shego. Then after
teaming up on Shego they would go after each other
and even more people would be sent to the howling void of nothingness in the
name of their pathetic rivalries.
Eventually one of them would
win. But would there be anything left for the winner to rule? Kim couldn't
imagine that even Shego would like ruling over a
destroyed planet, but that would be the end result. Maybe the villain who wound
up as the last person left would then go insane from loniless
and kill them self to end the sadness. Now that would be just a wonderful
picture. As a madman once clearly delineated "No One Gets Out Alive."
This was a Brave New World of lunatics. It was the world of Hell's Gym, where
the strength of the insane ruled things.
Kim felt like crying, but her
tear ducts had been spent earlier on Ron's ghost. She had been absorbed by
sorrow long ago.
She tried to discover where it
was exactly that life had gone wrong. But there was no precise moment. A number
of weeks ago she had been The Kim Possible, the invincible teen super hero. She
had been the one saving Drakken and trying to save
him, now Drakken was her caretaker. Ron had lived.
The entire old world had still been intact. Then in the space of a little over
the month the entire world had been shattered from North to South pole. How did evil grow so big so fast?
That was not easy question. A
villain coalition had been a long time fear of heroes, the only one to have
faced and one and emerged victorious having been the amazing Captain Freedom
back in the crew cut 50s. But the villain coalition was also supposed to be
something incredibly hard to put together, as villains generally hated one
another almost as much as they hated the heroes. Aside from the squads of
brainless henchmen they were not team players. The last great coalition had
been assembled by the charismatic Baron Von Chaos, who had backed it's
formation with his asteroid control machine. He had possessed both tremendous
power and bonafide evil charisma. Shego
was powerful no doubt but wasn't a leader type, she was very much into
solitude. Her life of crime had been focused on getting money to benefit herself and to get worldly thrills, not to take over the
world or other lofty goals like Drakken had wanted.
But then maybe Kim just didn't
know Shego very well. Maybe Shego
DID want all of the astronomical things that Drakken
had wanted once upon a time. Maybe Shego DID want to
enslave the human race. But then why work for some fool who would obviously
never achieve his lofty dreams? Kim didn't know what to think.
Kim made up her mind. Something
had to be working behind the scenes. Shego could
inspire fear and probably was smart enough to conquer the world, but would she
want to put in that kind of work? Her ambition seemed to be limited to wanting
to lie on tropical beaches in exotic places with pretty boys like Senior Senior Junior. Shego surely was
smart enough to know that taking over the world would require a lot of work and
then even more work to stay on top once she got to the peak of power. This did
not contrast with her real life love of soaking in the sun in the Bahamas.
So why had Shego
suddenly decided she wanted Drakken's dream?
There was a knock at the door.
"Come on." Kim said.
"I can't. Its locked." The voice responded.
"Oh
great. I have to do it. Okay...but you have to put me back on the
couch."
"Fine.
Just open the door, this place is creepy."
Kim worked hard to get to the
door, then someone got one hand high enough to reach
the knob. She opened the door and sure enough there she stood, having not
changed at all in the time Kim had reached this place. The girl of her memories
unchanged, tall, skin bronzed from the sun and with an unruly mane of dark
brown hair.
The only thing different was
her face. The oppressive self confidence Bonnie had seemed to have vanished.
"Hey. Done
here." Kim said. She had collapsed back onto the floor.
"Please don't step on me. I hurt. I hurt quite a bit."
Bonnie looked down and saw Kim.
It was not what she had expected. She had heard Kim Possible was badly injured,
but she hadn't believed it until she had seen it. Kim Possible had fading
bruises on her pretty face, several of the fingers on her left hand were
covered in bandages and both of her legs were casts.
"Oh God.
It is true." Bonnie muttered in horror. She slumped down in shock until
she was almost on the floor.
"Please Bonnie...help
me."
"Okay." She said in
the same low tone of voice. Bonnie picked Kim up and set her down on that
comfortable prison. "My God." She sighed.
"Your really hurt." She repeated in wonder
and horror as she regarded the broken heroine. The stories of good's demise in
the world were true indeed.
"Its
true. I'm broken."
Kim saw Bonnie turn away from
her.
Kim didn't think she could get
more horrified but did in that moment.
Bonnie Rockwaller
was crying. Crying terribly hard.
Kim had to know.
"Bonnie...what's happening in Middleton?"
