BLUE WASTELAND

A Kim Possible Oddity

By Psychedelic Leviathan and the Bad Assed Buddha

(KP is owned by Disney, blah blah blah.)

a/n: The last chapter came pretty easily for me. So maybe as far as this story goes my wicked instincts are beginning to dominate. I want to write 30 chapters, so I hope so. No not want...WILL! This is the last Kim Possible story I'm ever going to do since I already did my big Shego story and her and Drakken are the only reasons I watch the show. And because of that I want to go out with a thermonuclear blast and write a KP fic that will never be equaled by anyone else.

Warning: This chapter is VIOLENT. I may have to move the story into R for it.

"What is thy bidding my master?" A terrible imp like creature asked wide eyed.

The spittle flew off of the lips of that deranged army surplus store owner as he uttered his terrible commands. "MANSERVANT! BRING FORTH THE TV FROM HELL!"

"Right away master." The man servant saluted before shambling off ward to obey the will of Herman.

"AND SHINE UP MY IRON CROSSES!"

"That too." The man servant stated before vanishing from the rebels site.

They were all gathered together in the empty part of the exercise floor in that lion's den of perverts, psychopaths and thugs knew as HELL'S GYM. Drakken watched them from the pull up bar, pulling his chin up and over the top with an ease that was increasing with every work out. Many of the inmates of HELL'S GYM weren't actually in the rebellion, but a lot of them were watching the rebel meeting. Herman had decided that this would be the perfect place to recruit new members and plan without being watched by the forces of the woMAN. Yes they knew Shego was female, but after so many decades of rabidly declaring "DAMN THE MAN!" it was a difficult concept to re adjust too, so they referred to as the wo-MAN.

"You go blue homeboy." Irv watched in appreciation as the great mass of blue muscle continued to add to the growing number of pull ups that he could do. "All damn day."

"Word yo." Drakken laughed while holding himself in the halfway position to briefly talk. He then resumed his exercise. "THIRTY ONE...THIRTY TWO..."

"Holy fuck." Irv laughed in adulation of Drakken's ever waxing strength. "I've created a goddamned monster."

"Yo know it yo." Drakken retorted viciously. "THIRTY NINE...FORTY..."

"Damn damn damn." Irv repeated. "Level with me bro, what dosage are you using?"

"Dosage?"

"Drakken please I know bodybuilding. You simply cannot improve that much that fast without some added chemical help."

"Oh you mean steroids? I'm using any." Drakken told him matter of factly. "FORTY FIVE..."

"Then what are you using? I know your using SOMETHING dawg, what your doing in here just isn't natural." He then took on a conspirator's look. "Though I must say we all cheat nature here in HELL'S GYM if you know what I mean. Nature is chicken shit."

"Amen."

"Nature is the reason we're human and not the fucking gods. But with bodybuilding you change all that. You become something that though it ain't a god it sure ain't a human being either. Its halfway to being one of the immortals." He brandished one of his monster arms in order to make his point.

"Big man muscles." Drakken grunted. "SIXTY! SIXTY ONE!"

"FUCK THAT!" Irv exclaimed. "What did I just tell you Drakken? FUCK MEN! You know? I DON'T WANNA BE NO FUCKING MAN! I WANNA BE A SUPERMAN!" He then violently picked up a pair of hundred and fifty pound dumbbells from the rack and began to curl them with a kind of prehistoric violence, Drakken admiring his unearthly biceps as he strained himself against the seeming laws of physics. "GARAHHHHH!" He snarled.

"Jesus." Drakken almost whispered in awe. He then returned to the endless set of pull ups. "150s? I though those were only for legs. And people with tree legs too."

"FUCK THAT! ONE! I SAY FUCK IT! TWO! FUCK PAIN! THREE!"

"ALL DAMN DAY!" Drakken yelled at Irv's titanic effort.

"DAMN THE MAN! SIX!"

"EIGHTY! AGAINST THE WORLD IRV! DO THAT NOW!"

Irv howled as he hit the eighth repetition, laughing at the world as he curled ever upward the three hundred pounds of combined weight. "LIVE FOREVER DRAKKEN! WE'RE GONNA FUCKING LIVE FOREVER!"

"BE AS GODS! NINTY!"

"TEN! I'M GONNA LIVE FOREVER!"

"ONE...HUNDRED!"

"GONNA LEARN HOW TO FLY!"

"HUNDRED AND TWO PULL UPS!"

Drakken's hands could hold no longer and fell to the ground onto his muscular back, gasping from the climax of his efforts. He felt a wetness on his hands and saw that he had left blood on the bar.

"TWELVE MOTHERFUCKER!" Irv growled as he finally dropped the two 150 pound monsters to the floor with a rumbling thud. He then sprawled out breathless on the ground next to Drakken.

"Holy shit." Drakken gasped in sweat covered exhaustion.

"Dawg..." Irv rambled between draining the atmosphere with his iron lungs. "Am I hallucinating from the pump or did you leave your own blood on that bar?"

"I did...I felt my skin rip on it..."

"RIGHTEOUS..." He exclaimed intensely. "You are my boy Drakken...that's my BOY motherfucker..."

Irv was pulled up a behemoth in a Raiders jersey. "Its a bear huh?" the stranger asked.

"You got that." Irv stated. "A mother polar bear, whose cubs have just been molested." Irv then turned his attention to Drakken. "Come on man...we're done..."

Drakken was pulled to his feet by Irv. "Alrite." He stated.

"Lets re-hydrate, then get political with those guys over there."

"Political?"

"Yeah...as in DAMN THE MAN!"

"Right, I'm down with that fo sure dawg."

"Can I get a fuck authority from ya dawg?"

"FUCK AUTHORITY!"

"My man!"

"You know it I-dawg."

Irv nodded. In his opinion Drakken had made the evolution from brutha to righteous brutha in the recent time period, so now he could use the ghetto speak at will. Drakken was now legit down with the infernal clan of HELL'S GYM. All of the boys were into the enter principle of DAMNING THE MAN and FUCK AUTHORITY and he was now one of them. Drakken of course had known all along that he was going to make it, he had the 'does not play well with others' attitude that they all held in the greatest admiration.

They entered the locker room and began showering off the rivers of gritty sweat from their self inflicted torment.

"So you really worked with Shego huh?"

"I did. She worked for me actually."

"I thought you were partners or something. Shego working under anyone, it doesn't seem very real to me. But then what do I know, I've never met her in real life."

"It was only in name. She had all of the power in the relationship, mainly because she was able to burn things with her hands."

"What are we going to do about that?"

"The burning hands, I don't know how to neutralize that yet. But until we do I don't want a rematch."

"Oh yeah, you fought Shego huh? That's legit righteous."

"Not very well. I got beat pretty good. Though I did have my moment, I was able to get a clear line of fire on her. I could have shot her, if I hadn't gotten weak."

"Well you won't next time. Pull the trigger on that bad boy, blow her in half."

"That's what I'm hoping. But we need a next time."

"Well that's why were getting political. So we can start the revolution and raise all kinds of hell and anarchy."

"That's gonna be kick ass. Hell and anarchy for so' yo."

"Heh. You know Drakken you don't have to do the banger crap away from those idiots. It's just a part of the territory. Now is it true about Kim Possible? Is she really fixed?"

"Fixed."

"I heard she's fully healed, ready to lead us to victory."

"She's healed, but I doubt if she can lead us anywhere."

"Now your the one whose tripping. Kim Possible can do anything, we all know that. She's a girl Captain Freedom."

"Freedom is dead."

"No he isn't. He just came back as Kim Possible. Its reincarnation."

"Whatever." Drakken said. "Go out and get political, I'll join you in a few minutes."

Drakken wanted to look at himself and the evolutionary forward progress he was achieving with every passing day. Irv had known what was up, he was being assisted in his strength program. Drakken had created a cell regeneration program that allowed for absolute muscle recovery in his body within hours, rather then the natural 2 day rest period. Because of this he was able to train the same muscle groups every day, which meant he was literally growing with every individual session.

On top of this he had used to his abnormal intelligence to literally perform genetic engineering upon himself. To stimulate the muscle fibers so that they would respond and grow twice as face as a normal's man.

He admired himself in the mirror. The victory of his determination and a victory of his scientific knowledge. He was no longer expanding, he was now expanded completely. The dream had been lived. He smiled a toothy grin, then as he flexed he watched as enormous slabs of blue beef clenched and strained. He bent himself into a front crab pose, with both of his arms and his pectorals flexed. The result was spectacular. He was not as chiseled as he'd like to be, but he was HUGE! He flexed his biceps and admired the veins that sprung up throughout them.

He walked back into the weight room in just his shorts, then walked over to the rack to pick up the 150 pound dumbbells he had seen Irv using. He wanted to see if his immense power was real, or if this was just some mirage.

Drakken wrapped his thick fingers around the thick bar and then pulled the weight up to his chest. He felt the weight, but it was fairly easy. He didn't even really breathe that hard. was it possible that he had gotten stronger just in the time that he had been in the shower. Had the science increased his recovery time to where twenty minutes after a workout...he could start all over again?

Drakken didn't care about the psychos congregating on the other side of the room, or even Herman's plan to blow up the Hoover Dam in order to bring around blackouts and the riots that inevitably occur in those blackouts. He just wanted to test his power. He picked up the biggest dumbbells in the room, a pair of two hundred pound monsters that he had never seen anybody lift before. It looked incomprehensible that they could even be moved. But Drakken seized them in his immense hands and curled them from starting position to his shoulders with only slight breathing on his behalf. He then raised the two giant weights over his head and chuckled evilly before setting them down.

There was no soreness in his body even from this. He knew his scientific experiments had succeeded. His recovery was instant and because of that he could now will himself to be as strong as he wanted. He figured that at his rate of growth soon he would likely be able bend steel bars with his bare hands. Somehow he had even gotten taller on top of this. The dream had been made flesh and blood. He had become the giant that he had envisioned early on, he was now the blue Arnold.

Drakken understood what he was going to do now with his new power. He would come back and join the rebels, but not before he took care of some old unfinished business. The blue tower swaggered out of the door and back to his back up lair.

He descended from the dark skies like an avenging demon. Drakken had strained to fit the war Armour over his two hundred and eighty pounds of bulk and he had eventually given up the idea of using it. He had settled for detaching the jet pack and using that on it's own to fly back to this accursed place where he had grown up. For a few seconds after touching down on the ground he felt uneasy, but that was irrelevant. He was not who had been back when he had been a small and frail boy with extremely thick glasses.

He knew it wouldn't be hard to find the men he was seeking. From what he heard they all still lived here, having joined local gangs at some point. He pulled an immense jacket over his broad shoulders to try to conceal his physique. Though it was still deniable that he was still large with the tent sized thing on, it was not immediately noticeable. This was key to his plan.

Drakken took a walk through his old hometown. He hated just being back in Texas, but he had need of this trip. He saw a number of people gasp at his inhuman appearance, not just a bodybuilder, not just the largest of bodybuilders, but a blue skinned steroid freak from what looked like another planet. Their whispers of terror and surprise invigorated him:

"Is that...Drew Lipski?"

"Oh mi gawd..."

"SICK!"

"Freaky!"

Drakken though this was all well and good, but it was not what he had been seeking. The people who vaguely recognized him were those who he had regarded in his childhood as being merely annoying. He was looking for those who had tormented him actively. He saw a familiar face and decided to ask for directions.

"Hello." Drakken stated his bassy voice.

The girl looked up in fear. "Drew...Drew Lipski from high school?"

"In the flesh."

"What..."

"I've been working out. Now tell me, do you know where my friend Jeffy is?"

"Oh, down on the avenues. Jesus."

"Thank you."

Drakken didn't recall what her name was, nor did he care. He just wanted to get his, and in the most violent manner possible. He strode through town until he crossed that bridge that separated the south side from the dilapidated and violent north. He walked around in the decrepit and quiet downtown.

Suddenly a man jumped out in front of him with what Drakken recognized as a gun. Before he could stick in Drakken's face Drakken grabbed his arm with both hands and twisted as hard as he was able to do so. The would be mugger howled, his face contorting into pain as Drakken broke his wrist, which caused the gun to drop. Drakken put his foot on the gun and then kicked the man in the stomach, then grabbed him by the chest and shoved him face first into a cement wall.

"Listen up dumbass." Drakken stated. "Nobody gets in front of me you dumb bitch. Not unless they want to be crippled."

"OWWW! FUCK!"

"You try anything like that again and I'll break your neck."

"FUCK YOU!"

Drakken grabbed the man by the throat and simply began to grip down upon his neck and Adam's apple. The bastard began to choke violently. "SHUT UP!"

"Fuck you."

Drakken then punched him. "You like that bitch?" He slugged him again. "Huh?" He delivered another rib buster, cracking whatever bones he hadn't already damaging in his initial assault. "You do huh?"

"No..." He groaned while spitting up blood.

"I'll let you live, but only if you tell me this. Do you know some bastard called Jeffy Adams? Gangbanger trash, beats people up."

"Yeah. He's right over there." The mugger pointed. Drakken turned around and the man ran away as fast as he could to avoid being finished off.

Drakken saw the fat bald skin headed bastard known as Jeffy right in front of him, along with six other semi homeboy guys. The term semi homeboy is to be used because even with the chains and gold they still looked more like inbred hicks then Compton's infamous Cripps or Bloods. But they were tough looking and mean, Drakken this well. Back in school they had picked on everyone else and had forced him to drink motor oil.

"Well well...if isn't the fat tub of lard himself." Drakken scowled at them.

Jeffy was not impressed. "So little Drew has come back to town. And he's...blue. Whatever."

Drakken smirked, the poncho was wearing did in fact make him look thinner. "Yeah? So what you dickhead?"

"We're gonna do what should have done to your punk ass back in the day. Come on boys, lets finish the job and kill this weak little dweeb."

One of them immediately jumped on Drakken, only to be lifted straight above his head and thrown effortlessly backwards into the group of rednecks.

Drakken threw aside the enormous poncho and then flexed his immense body, the veins seeming to spring out from everywhere on his huge muscles. All of the high school thugs turned real world criminals looked at him in astonished terror, even Jeffy.

"WHO YOU CALLING...WEAK?!" Drakken's booming voice demanded.

The flabbergasted Jeffy regained a bit of composure, but not all that much. "Alrite boys, he may have gotten a little stronger but he's still just Drew." He then made a fist and glared at the blue beast. "EVERYBODY PILE ON THE BIG MUSCULAR NERD!"

"MWHAHAHAHAH! JUST BRING IT LITTLE FATSO!" Drakken echoed in a wrestler's booming voice.

The thugs rushed Drakken in a wall of humanity, they all laid into him at about the same time. Drakken didn't even go down, even with all of the combined impact. They were piled on top of him all at once, men hanging from his torso and limbs.

For a few seconds Drakken just let him hit him, just to see how much tougher he had gotten. They drove their fists into him and though he felt it this was of no importance. Jeffy's fist had once sent him whimpering to the floor, but now it only felt like an irritating bee sting.

Drakken then decided to flex his might and with one exertion of power he threw everyone of them off of him at once. They landed in a heap and then tried to regroup, but this Drakken would have none of. He then gleefully uprooted up a graffiti covered stop sign and then clubbed one man with it so hard it fractured his skull. He then took the same sign and grabbed another one of his childhood bullies with a mad laughter.

"NO!" The fool howled.

"EAT STREET SIGN BITCH!"

Drakken literally stuffed the pole part of the sign down the man's throat, tearing apart his insides and causing him to collapse into a dying heap of thug.

Two of the remaining four pulled out knives and lunged at him, but Drakken grabbed a trashcan and used it to absorb the knife blow. With their blades caught Drakken then dropped the can and fell upon them with a vengeance. He punched the living crap out of one of them and then kicked the other in the groin savagely. Those two idiots were unfamiliar to him, so he just settled for beating on them and moved on.

One man between him and Jeffy. Drakken advanced on him, but he broke down crying like a small child and ran away. Drakken did not follow, for he was too focused to the object of his childhood torment.

"BACK OFF FUCKER!" Jeffy hollered.

"Did you really think I'd let you off the hook. Fucker you made me drink motor oil! And took my money! And gave me like a thousand atomic wedgies!"

"Hey, it wasn't that much motor oil, just enough to make you sick. We weren't gonna kill you."

"MOTHERFUCKER! YOUR DAY OF JUDGEMENT IS AT HAND! AND I AM THE BLUE REAPER!"

Drakken used the old grab and yank move to great effect, seizing hold of Jeffy's crotch and pulling as hard as he could. No sooner did that bring the redneck thug to his knees then he kicked him in the head. Jeffy was nearly blinded when Drakken punched him as hard as he could. Drakken kicked him in the knee cap so hard that his leg broke. Drakken showed absolutely no mercy. He broke Jeffy's other leg. He kicked his ribs straight back into his lungs. He kicked him in the crotch again and again. He grabbed his fingers and broke them in his hands one at a time. Watching gleefully as tears welled up in the bastard's eyes.

"WHO IS THE MOTHERFUCKING MAN!?" Drakken demanded sadistically.

"YOU ARE!"

"AND DON'T YOU FORGET IT!" Drakken grinned.

Every bone that the mugger and rapist had Drakken systematically broke it, until eventually the mercy of death's oblivion came to him.

Drakken put one mighty foot on Jeffy's shattered body and roared to the sky like a victorious Tyrannosaurus Rex standing over it's broken prey.

"Holy shit..." one of Jeffy's men trembled, cowering behind a trash can.

"Let me tell you this." Drakken smiled demonically. "The reason your still alive is cause I have no idea who you are."

"Don't kill me...I swear I won't fucking rat you out."

"Okay. But you do...I'll come looking for you. Cause this shit was between me and him."

"You got it big guy...fuck..." He cringed in terror.

Drakken stood in the alley to admire his handy work for a few more seconds. Police sirens were growing in the distance, so he figured it was time to bail. He then pulled out a spray can and left a message on the walls in red paint.

'THESE EVIL BASTARDS THOUGHT THEY WERE ALL THAT...BUT THEY WEREN'T!!! BIG BAD DRAKKEN IS KING FOREVER' It read.

Satisfied with this he turned on his jetpack and took to the skies in euphoria over his recent violent crimes. Jeffy was dead now, his dreams would be free of him forever. It had been so easy too do, the whole thing happening within less then a minute. He set down on a mountain near his old hometown to rest for a few minutes before heading back to New Mexico. He was trembling with animalistic exultation.

He raised his arms to the sky in imitation of Rocky Balboa, a psychopathic blue skinned Rocky Balboa. Then he stated his new goal now that Jeffy was dead.

"SHEGOOOOOOO!" He howled. "SSSSHHHHEEEEGGGOOO!!!!!!"

His massive cries echoed across those darkening desert plains.