A/N: This chapter is basically about Jennifer and her sorting out her feelings about all the drama that's going on, so no Randy in this one but I promise he'll be in the next one.
Chapter 17:
Tuesday night, May 4th
Jennifer yawned as she tiredly opened the door of Michael's house at around midnight--she had spent nearly the whole day at the police station and she was beyond tired. Jennifer threw her keys on the nearby table and slowly climbed the steps up to her room.
Jennifer pushed opened the door of her room and plopped down on her bed, the days events came flashing through her head:
"It was a gang shooting---he had multiple gun shot wounds to the chest and head--about 15 shots in total," said the detective.
"He was dealing drugs when a car of thugs came by and started shooting--it was basically a wrong time, wrong place situation"
Tears stung Jennifer's eyes as the memory played through her mind over and over, she knew that something would happen to Danny if he kept doing what he was doing--but the reality of knowing she will never see him again came crashing into her thoughts like a train crash. Danny may have hurt her but the memories of better times with him out did any bad memory of Danny. The Danny she knew used to leave flowers at her work everyday, the Danny she knew called her up and left silly voice messages on her phone just to cheer her up.
Jennifer wiped at her tears as she glanced at the picture frame setting on her night stand, it was an old picture of her and Danny on her 17th birthday, they were setting on his motorcycle and Jennifer's arms were wrapped around Danny's waist as she sat behind him, the two were smiling brightly at the camera. Jennifer gently picked up the picture and fingered the wooden frame surrounding the picture, shortly after the picture was taken was when Danny started to get involved in drugs and that's when their relationship went downhill.
Jennifer sighed deeply and dropped the picture on the floor, the sound of broken glass rung in Jennifer's ears as she began to cry.
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Wednesday Morning, May 5th:
Jennifer slowly made her way downstairs the next morning at around 11am. She could hear the familiar sounds of cartoons playing in the living room and Cameron's laughter. She glanced in the living room and saw Cameron sprawled out on the floor with his elbows propped up to his head and paying attention to the TV. Toys of all kinds were scattered throughout the room.
Jennifer smiled and walked into the room and sat cross legged beside Cameron, "Hey munchkin--whatcha watching?" she asked as she ruffled his hair.
"Ponge Bob" Cameron grinned as he turned his attention back to the TV, Jennifer smiled and watched the TV along with Cameron.
Rebecca walked in a few minutes later and stood with her hands on her hips, "Cameron--Didn't I tell you to put away your toys when you're done playing with them?"
Cameron looked over at his Mom, "I'm still going to pway with dem mommy," he said innocently.
Rebecca smiled and turned her attention to Jennifer, "Wanna help in the kitchen?" she asked.
Jennifer knew that when Rebecca said this that she wanted to talk, so Jennifer nodded and stood up, ruffling Cameron's head once more and followed Rebecca down the hall.
Jennifer sat down at the breakfast nook while Rebecca came over with a cup of coffee and handed it to her, she sat down and said, "You wanna tell me what's wrong?" she asked softly.
Jennifer took the cup and stared at it, she sighed and said, "I'll be okay."
Rebecca leaned forward toward Jennifer and said gently, "Jennifer--you haven't been okay in a long time--everyone around you can see that something's wrong, especially since the news of Danny came so suddenly."
"It's just--I'm trying so hard to not care that Danny's gone--after everything he's put me through--but I can't help but feel that a part of me is gone," Jennifer said as she swirled the spoon around in her coffee.
"Honey--Danny was your first love--you never get over your first love, whether it was good or bad, now I know Danny made a lot of bad decisions in his life but there is a reason why you loved him so much, not for all the wrongs, but for all the rights--that's what counts," Rebecca said.
Jennifer nodded and took a sip from her cup, "it's just--all these things are happening at one time and I feel like my life is a turning wheel that's out of control and I have no idea how to handle all this," she put her head in her hands and rubbed her temples.
Rebecca smiled sympathetically, "Everyone comes to that point in their lives where they feel the world is coming down upon them -- this is the point in your life where you have to make decisions that affect the rest of your life, it's called growing up sweetie."
"It's so hard," Jennifer said as tears started to fall, "it seems that all I do is cry, I can't even remember the last time I smiled, or laughed genuinely--I just--miss being happy."
Rebecca reached over and grabbed Jennifer's hands, "You will be Jennifer, I know right now it doesn't seem like it--but you will be happy again.---it's just a matter of how you deal with your decisions." Jennifer looked up and nodded, "Now I know you also have a certain wrestler that's on your mind," Rebecca smiled.
Jennifer gave a small smile as she thought of Randy, Rebecca noticed and laughed, "I think I see the start of a smile---what's the problem?"
Jennifer sighed and ran a hand through her hair, "It's--Randy is the sweetest guy in the world, he's funny--caring--fun to be around, but there's something that's holding me back, I don't know why or what it is but everytime I feel myself getting too close--I just---pull away and it's not fair to me and especially him."
"Do you love him?" Rebecca asked.
Jennifer looked up and shrugged, "I--I guess--I mean it's really complicated it's like one minute I wanna jump him and the next I wanna strangle him."
Rebecca laughed, "Yeah I know what you mean." She leaned back in her seat and said, "But in all seriousness--it seems like you really care about Randy but think about this--is his faults serious enough to destroy any friendship you might ever have with him? If you really feel that a relationship has disaster written all over it then it's best not to get involved but if you sort out your feelings and wanna take a a risk then you gotta tell him how you feel, you gotta be open."
Jennifer nodded, "Just remember this Jennifer---you gotta ask yourself if what your scared of is Randy's actions--or your own feelings for him" Rebecca said as she stood up and walked over to Jennifer and put her hands on her shoulders, "Don't be scared to be open with your feelings Jen," she said softly as she gave a smile.
Jennifer smiled and stood up to hug Rebecca, "Thank-you," she said.
"Anytime", Rebecca said as she hugged her back.
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Even though this chapter doesn't involve Randy directly, I still think it's an important part of the story but I know it's not the most exciting chapter, I've got 2 more chapters I think and I already know what I'm doing with the end which I'm already starting on lol so make sure to review and I'll get the ending up sooner!!!!
Chapter 17:
Tuesday night, May 4th
Jennifer yawned as she tiredly opened the door of Michael's house at around midnight--she had spent nearly the whole day at the police station and she was beyond tired. Jennifer threw her keys on the nearby table and slowly climbed the steps up to her room.
Jennifer pushed opened the door of her room and plopped down on her bed, the days events came flashing through her head:
"It was a gang shooting---he had multiple gun shot wounds to the chest and head--about 15 shots in total," said the detective.
"He was dealing drugs when a car of thugs came by and started shooting--it was basically a wrong time, wrong place situation"
Tears stung Jennifer's eyes as the memory played through her mind over and over, she knew that something would happen to Danny if he kept doing what he was doing--but the reality of knowing she will never see him again came crashing into her thoughts like a train crash. Danny may have hurt her but the memories of better times with him out did any bad memory of Danny. The Danny she knew used to leave flowers at her work everyday, the Danny she knew called her up and left silly voice messages on her phone just to cheer her up.
Jennifer wiped at her tears as she glanced at the picture frame setting on her night stand, it was an old picture of her and Danny on her 17th birthday, they were setting on his motorcycle and Jennifer's arms were wrapped around Danny's waist as she sat behind him, the two were smiling brightly at the camera. Jennifer gently picked up the picture and fingered the wooden frame surrounding the picture, shortly after the picture was taken was when Danny started to get involved in drugs and that's when their relationship went downhill.
Jennifer sighed deeply and dropped the picture on the floor, the sound of broken glass rung in Jennifer's ears as she began to cry.
---------------------
Wednesday Morning, May 5th:
Jennifer slowly made her way downstairs the next morning at around 11am. She could hear the familiar sounds of cartoons playing in the living room and Cameron's laughter. She glanced in the living room and saw Cameron sprawled out on the floor with his elbows propped up to his head and paying attention to the TV. Toys of all kinds were scattered throughout the room.
Jennifer smiled and walked into the room and sat cross legged beside Cameron, "Hey munchkin--whatcha watching?" she asked as she ruffled his hair.
"Ponge Bob" Cameron grinned as he turned his attention back to the TV, Jennifer smiled and watched the TV along with Cameron.
Rebecca walked in a few minutes later and stood with her hands on her hips, "Cameron--Didn't I tell you to put away your toys when you're done playing with them?"
Cameron looked over at his Mom, "I'm still going to pway with dem mommy," he said innocently.
Rebecca smiled and turned her attention to Jennifer, "Wanna help in the kitchen?" she asked.
Jennifer knew that when Rebecca said this that she wanted to talk, so Jennifer nodded and stood up, ruffling Cameron's head once more and followed Rebecca down the hall.
Jennifer sat down at the breakfast nook while Rebecca came over with a cup of coffee and handed it to her, she sat down and said, "You wanna tell me what's wrong?" she asked softly.
Jennifer took the cup and stared at it, she sighed and said, "I'll be okay."
Rebecca leaned forward toward Jennifer and said gently, "Jennifer--you haven't been okay in a long time--everyone around you can see that something's wrong, especially since the news of Danny came so suddenly."
"It's just--I'm trying so hard to not care that Danny's gone--after everything he's put me through--but I can't help but feel that a part of me is gone," Jennifer said as she swirled the spoon around in her coffee.
"Honey--Danny was your first love--you never get over your first love, whether it was good or bad, now I know Danny made a lot of bad decisions in his life but there is a reason why you loved him so much, not for all the wrongs, but for all the rights--that's what counts," Rebecca said.
Jennifer nodded and took a sip from her cup, "it's just--all these things are happening at one time and I feel like my life is a turning wheel that's out of control and I have no idea how to handle all this," she put her head in her hands and rubbed her temples.
Rebecca smiled sympathetically, "Everyone comes to that point in their lives where they feel the world is coming down upon them -- this is the point in your life where you have to make decisions that affect the rest of your life, it's called growing up sweetie."
"It's so hard," Jennifer said as tears started to fall, "it seems that all I do is cry, I can't even remember the last time I smiled, or laughed genuinely--I just--miss being happy."
Rebecca reached over and grabbed Jennifer's hands, "You will be Jennifer, I know right now it doesn't seem like it--but you will be happy again.---it's just a matter of how you deal with your decisions." Jennifer looked up and nodded, "Now I know you also have a certain wrestler that's on your mind," Rebecca smiled.
Jennifer gave a small smile as she thought of Randy, Rebecca noticed and laughed, "I think I see the start of a smile---what's the problem?"
Jennifer sighed and ran a hand through her hair, "It's--Randy is the sweetest guy in the world, he's funny--caring--fun to be around, but there's something that's holding me back, I don't know why or what it is but everytime I feel myself getting too close--I just---pull away and it's not fair to me and especially him."
"Do you love him?" Rebecca asked.
Jennifer looked up and shrugged, "I--I guess--I mean it's really complicated it's like one minute I wanna jump him and the next I wanna strangle him."
Rebecca laughed, "Yeah I know what you mean." She leaned back in her seat and said, "But in all seriousness--it seems like you really care about Randy but think about this--is his faults serious enough to destroy any friendship you might ever have with him? If you really feel that a relationship has disaster written all over it then it's best not to get involved but if you sort out your feelings and wanna take a a risk then you gotta tell him how you feel, you gotta be open."
Jennifer nodded, "Just remember this Jennifer---you gotta ask yourself if what your scared of is Randy's actions--or your own feelings for him" Rebecca said as she stood up and walked over to Jennifer and put her hands on her shoulders, "Don't be scared to be open with your feelings Jen," she said softly as she gave a smile.
Jennifer smiled and stood up to hug Rebecca, "Thank-you," she said.
"Anytime", Rebecca said as she hugged her back.
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Even though this chapter doesn't involve Randy directly, I still think it's an important part of the story but I know it's not the most exciting chapter, I've got 2 more chapters I think and I already know what I'm doing with the end which I'm already starting on lol so make sure to review and I'll get the ending up sooner!!!!