Snape's Three Brothers Chapter 2
Title: Snape's Three Brothers
Author: Max
E-mail: jadekirk007@y...
Rating: R to be on the safe side
Pairings: Remus/?? Severus/?? Steven/?? Shaun/??
Archive: Yes, please
Summary: Snape's three crazy brothers have come to pay our dear old Severus a visit.Can Severus last the whole time that they are there without cursing them off the face of the Earth especially as one of the brothers cause a series of events which Hogwarts might not recover from.Set in Harry's Sixth year.This is an AU because I haven't killed off Siruis and he's been found innocent.Remus Lupin is DADA teacher...I just love him. All the brothers sound and look alike.One of the brothers reveal a secret of theirs.Mentions of my other fics and characters so be warned.Top marks to whoever spots the snippet of the song that's featured in this chapter. Beware though I like to pick on random actors so don't be surprised...
Chapter 2
"Oh that's just what I always wanted to do."Alan said,sarcastically.He sighed. "Looks like I don't have a choice..."Alan muttered."Okay I'll do it."
"Thank you Alan or should I say Professor Snape, Mark Two?"Dumbledore said, patting Alan's arm.
Dumbledore stood up and opened his mouth but shut it again when Remus piped up, "Why don't you use your new surname, Alan? That way we won't get confused."
"Oh yeah and have all the muggleborns drool over him like he's God or something." Severus muttereed bitterly.
Dumbledore smiled,"I'm sorry Alan...You'll have to go by your birth name."
"Damn, spoil my fun, oh well, they can call me, well they can just call me Alan coz I can't be bothered with all this 'Professor Snape' crap."
"Yeah or the students could call you 'The Voice' or something..." Shaun muttered.
"Everyone,Can I have your attention please? This is the new muggle studies teacher, well, he'll be assisting Professor Dane, He's asked to be called Alan to avoid confusion with his younger brother."Dumbledore anounced.everyone clapped, especially the girls.
Alan smiled and sat down next to Remus Lupin, much to Severus' disgust.
Hermione put up her hand, Alan pointed to her, "Yes, Can I help you, Hermione? This isn't class so you don't need to raise your hand."
"Um, Sirius mentioned this in potions last week,"Hermione started.She took a deep breath,then continued, "What is the Snape triplet curse?"
Severus, Shaun and Steven paled, and looked at Alan, who sighed, "Well guys, she's bound to find out sooner or later," he paused and looked at his younger brothers for help."It's a really embarrasing curse which only affects tribbles born to the Snape family, no that's not right, I meant triplets."
"Star Trek going to your head, eh Alan?" Steven muttered, smirking. "I bet you just love William Shatner to....."
"Well for God's sake, just tell her before we all grow as old as you Alan..."Shaun muttered, interupting Steven's comments."Steven that is just uncalled for...Alan doesn't like Bill that much.... it's David Thewlis who's his favourite actor."
"Well you see.....my brothers are cheeky sods and should be given to Remus to use as a chew toy..."Alan turned to Steven and Shaun."David Thewlis is NOT my favourite actor and he'd kill you if he heard what you said."
"Miss Parkinson has a crush on him."Remus piped up."She told us all in Potions, when Severus was testing out that potion."
"Yeah especially as you get to be all cosy with him in the next Harry...."
"Shut up, I'm trying to tell them what the curse is and I can't if you keep interupting."
"Nah it's Gary Oldman."
"Jason Isaacs."
Alan sighed and ran his hands through his hair."For gods sake.I wish you'd shut up."
Severus stands up."I have lessons to see to."As he turned to leave, Steven fired a curse which hit him in the backside, causing Severus to yelp and whirl round."Who did that?"
Shaun smirked and muttered."Turn the other cheek brother."
"Someone has been watching Dragonheart again...."Steven said.
"Alan did it."Steven proclaimed.
"You liar."
"Prove it."
Severus huffedand stalked out of the Great Hall.
"Anyway the curse is..."Alan paused, then he spoke at top speed, "It'sacursewhichaffectstrpiletsbornintheSnapefamilyanditcausesthetripletsborntoshareeachothersemotionsanddesires.theycanevenshareeachothersthoughtsanditcancausegreatembarassmenttoall.OhandbythewayDavidThewlisisaverygoodfriendofminesodon'tinsulthimorhemightcomedownonyoulikeatonofbricksandheknowswhatI'mdoinghereandhesayshitohiscousinRemusandthat'swhyRemuslookslikehim.."As he finished everyone looked stunned as they only caught a few words of it.
"I'm not going to say it."Remus muttered.
Alan smirked as he told them but they couldn't catch it all so he was pleased.He stood up and left the Hsll singing as he went out of the hall."Look into my eyes - you will see
What you mean to me Search your heart - search your soul And when you find me there you'll search no more Don't tell me it's not worth tryin' for You can't tell me it's not worth dyin' for...."
Remus shook his head as Alan's voice faded from earshot."He's cracked.Must be hanging round those muggles too long..."
TBC
Title: Snape's Three Brothers
Author: Max
E-mail: jadekirk007@y...
Rating: R to be on the safe side
Pairings: Remus/?? Severus/?? Steven/?? Shaun/??
Archive: Yes, please
Summary: Snape's three crazy brothers have come to pay our dear old Severus a visit.Can Severus last the whole time that they are there without cursing them off the face of the Earth especially as one of the brothers cause a series of events which Hogwarts might not recover from.Set in Harry's Sixth year.This is an AU because I haven't killed off Siruis and he's been found innocent.Remus Lupin is DADA teacher...I just love him. All the brothers sound and look alike.One of the brothers reveal a secret of theirs.Mentions of my other fics and characters so be warned.Top marks to whoever spots the snippet of the song that's featured in this chapter. Beware though I like to pick on random actors so don't be surprised...
Chapter 2
"Oh that's just what I always wanted to do."Alan said,sarcastically.He sighed. "Looks like I don't have a choice..."Alan muttered."Okay I'll do it."
"Thank you Alan or should I say Professor Snape, Mark Two?"Dumbledore said, patting Alan's arm.
Dumbledore stood up and opened his mouth but shut it again when Remus piped up, "Why don't you use your new surname, Alan? That way we won't get confused."
"Oh yeah and have all the muggleborns drool over him like he's God or something." Severus muttereed bitterly.
Dumbledore smiled,"I'm sorry Alan...You'll have to go by your birth name."
"Damn, spoil my fun, oh well, they can call me, well they can just call me Alan coz I can't be bothered with all this 'Professor Snape' crap."
"Yeah or the students could call you 'The Voice' or something..." Shaun muttered.
"Everyone,Can I have your attention please? This is the new muggle studies teacher, well, he'll be assisting Professor Dane, He's asked to be called Alan to avoid confusion with his younger brother."Dumbledore anounced.everyone clapped, especially the girls.
Alan smiled and sat down next to Remus Lupin, much to Severus' disgust.
Hermione put up her hand, Alan pointed to her, "Yes, Can I help you, Hermione? This isn't class so you don't need to raise your hand."
"Um, Sirius mentioned this in potions last week,"Hermione started.She took a deep breath,then continued, "What is the Snape triplet curse?"
Severus, Shaun and Steven paled, and looked at Alan, who sighed, "Well guys, she's bound to find out sooner or later," he paused and looked at his younger brothers for help."It's a really embarrasing curse which only affects tribbles born to the Snape family, no that's not right, I meant triplets."
"Star Trek going to your head, eh Alan?" Steven muttered, smirking. "I bet you just love William Shatner to....."
"Well for God's sake, just tell her before we all grow as old as you Alan..."Shaun muttered, interupting Steven's comments."Steven that is just uncalled for...Alan doesn't like Bill that much.... it's David Thewlis who's his favourite actor."
"Well you see.....my brothers are cheeky sods and should be given to Remus to use as a chew toy..."Alan turned to Steven and Shaun."David Thewlis is NOT my favourite actor and he'd kill you if he heard what you said."
"Miss Parkinson has a crush on him."Remus piped up."She told us all in Potions, when Severus was testing out that potion."
"Yeah especially as you get to be all cosy with him in the next Harry...."
"Shut up, I'm trying to tell them what the curse is and I can't if you keep interupting."
"Nah it's Gary Oldman."
"Jason Isaacs."
Alan sighed and ran his hands through his hair."For gods sake.I wish you'd shut up."
Severus stands up."I have lessons to see to."As he turned to leave, Steven fired a curse which hit him in the backside, causing Severus to yelp and whirl round."Who did that?"
Shaun smirked and muttered."Turn the other cheek brother."
"Someone has been watching Dragonheart again...."Steven said.
"Alan did it."Steven proclaimed.
"You liar."
"Prove it."
Severus huffedand stalked out of the Great Hall.
"Anyway the curse is..."Alan paused, then he spoke at top speed, "It'sacursewhichaffectstrpiletsbornintheSnapefamilyanditcausesthetripletsborntoshareeachothersemotionsanddesires.theycanevenshareeachothersthoughtsanditcancausegreatembarassmenttoall.OhandbythewayDavidThewlisisaverygoodfriendofminesodon'tinsulthimorhemightcomedownonyoulikeatonofbricksandheknowswhatI'mdoinghereandhesayshitohiscousinRemusandthat'swhyRemuslookslikehim.."As he finished everyone looked stunned as they only caught a few words of it.
"I'm not going to say it."Remus muttered.
Alan smirked as he told them but they couldn't catch it all so he was pleased.He stood up and left the Hsll singing as he went out of the hall."Look into my eyes - you will see
What you mean to me Search your heart - search your soul And when you find me there you'll search no more Don't tell me it's not worth tryin' for You can't tell me it's not worth dyin' for...."
Remus shook his head as Alan's voice faded from earshot."He's cracked.Must be hanging round those muggles too long..."
TBC