Title: Snape's Three Brothers
Author: Max
E-mail: jadekirk007@y...
Rating: R to be on the safe side Although I might have to change it up to an NC17 fic)
Pairings: Remus/?? Severus/?? Steven/?? Shaun/??
Archive: Yes, please
Summary: Snape's three crazy brothers have come to pay our dear old Severus a visit. Can Severus last the whole time that they are there without cursing them off the face of the Earth especially as one of the brothers cause a series of events which Hogwarts might not recover from. Set in Harry's Sixth year. This is an AU because I haven't killed off Sirius and he's been found innocent. Remus Lupin is DADA teacher...I just love him. All the brothers sound and look alike. One of the brothers reveal a secret of theirs. Mentions of my other fics and characters so be warned. Beware though I like to pick on random actors so don't be surprised. I also pick on other people so be afraid. OK Severus and Alan have switched bodies so when I refer to them I'm referring to how the others see them. When I refer to Alan I'm really referring to Severus in Alan's body and vice versa...++FB++ are flashbacks. It's very short…
Chapter 19
Alan stopped laughing first, the others stopped soon after, and rounded on Severus, "God Alan, how did that happen?"
"Severus, I think it's time we had the talk about the birds and the bees..." Severus muttered.
"I didn't mean that, I meant... I don't know what I meant..."
"I think I got what you meant, I think you want to know how Alan got himself into this mess in the first place but, correct me if I'm wrong, the didn't have contraceptives in the Dark Ages.." Steven intejected.
"Shut up, Steven, or I swear I will feed you to Remus, when he's in wolf form..." Severus growled, "You know as well as I do that I'm only 15 years older than you..."
"That means you were only 15 when you conceived James Potter, so you weren't only irresponsible, you were illegal..." Steven said, looking happy, "Ooh Alan, you will have to be punished, maybe Hermione would do the honours..." Steven looked at Hermione, who blushed, "I will also choose to ignore the threat of the Lupin Chew toy idea because he'll never speak to you again if you did that."
"Works for me..." Alan said, "So when's the next full moon?"
"Tonight."
"Good, we'll tie him to the door and maybe he'll hump his leg before he has a snack on him..." Shaun muttered. Harry, Ron, Hermione and a few Gryffindors within earshot looked green.
"Now who's wanting to make the wonder boy faint?" Alan said, raising an eyebrow. "Just because I'm his great Uncle doesn't mean I'm going to treat him any differently."
"You're handling this well, Severus."
"On the outside, yes, on the inside, I want to scream and tear my hair out." Alan admitted. He turned to Harry, "I'm warning you Potter, call me Great Uncle Sevvie, even once and I will curse you in to the middle of next week, got that?"
TBC
Author: Max
E-mail: jadekirk007@y...
Rating: R to be on the safe side Although I might have to change it up to an NC17 fic)
Pairings: Remus/?? Severus/?? Steven/?? Shaun/??
Archive: Yes, please
Summary: Snape's three crazy brothers have come to pay our dear old Severus a visit. Can Severus last the whole time that they are there without cursing them off the face of the Earth especially as one of the brothers cause a series of events which Hogwarts might not recover from. Set in Harry's Sixth year. This is an AU because I haven't killed off Sirius and he's been found innocent. Remus Lupin is DADA teacher...I just love him. All the brothers sound and look alike. One of the brothers reveal a secret of theirs. Mentions of my other fics and characters so be warned. Beware though I like to pick on random actors so don't be surprised. I also pick on other people so be afraid. OK Severus and Alan have switched bodies so when I refer to them I'm referring to how the others see them. When I refer to Alan I'm really referring to Severus in Alan's body and vice versa...++FB++ are flashbacks. It's very short…
Chapter 19
Alan stopped laughing first, the others stopped soon after, and rounded on Severus, "God Alan, how did that happen?"
"Severus, I think it's time we had the talk about the birds and the bees..." Severus muttered.
"I didn't mean that, I meant... I don't know what I meant..."
"I think I got what you meant, I think you want to know how Alan got himself into this mess in the first place but, correct me if I'm wrong, the didn't have contraceptives in the Dark Ages.." Steven intejected.
"Shut up, Steven, or I swear I will feed you to Remus, when he's in wolf form..." Severus growled, "You know as well as I do that I'm only 15 years older than you..."
"That means you were only 15 when you conceived James Potter, so you weren't only irresponsible, you were illegal..." Steven said, looking happy, "Ooh Alan, you will have to be punished, maybe Hermione would do the honours..." Steven looked at Hermione, who blushed, "I will also choose to ignore the threat of the Lupin Chew toy idea because he'll never speak to you again if you did that."
"Works for me..." Alan said, "So when's the next full moon?"
"Tonight."
"Good, we'll tie him to the door and maybe he'll hump his leg before he has a snack on him..." Shaun muttered. Harry, Ron, Hermione and a few Gryffindors within earshot looked green.
"Now who's wanting to make the wonder boy faint?" Alan said, raising an eyebrow. "Just because I'm his great Uncle doesn't mean I'm going to treat him any differently."
"You're handling this well, Severus."
"On the outside, yes, on the inside, I want to scream and tear my hair out." Alan admitted. He turned to Harry, "I'm warning you Potter, call me Great Uncle Sevvie, even once and I will curse you in to the middle of next week, got that?"
TBC