Sinful Addiction

Standard Disclaimers Apply

Warning: Shounen-ai. Incest. If you couldn't bare that, I suggest you leave this page immediately. *No flame* (If you're reading this chapter, I guess there's no problem with that, ne?)

Note: This chapter, like the last one, is part POV but this one's Sasuke's. (Written in Italic) Thank you for reviewing and commenting advises. I'm so grateful.

Oh, and the picture with Sasuke playing flute is in one of the chapter titles in Naruto manga. Actually, it isn't the solo picture of Sasuke but there're Naruto and Sakura as well.

Chapter V: Ice

Time flies.

I don't know how long it has been since I last saw him. And I don't bother to count, for time doesn't matter to me. I just pass the days like I don't care. Yet I know I do. How could someone's life turn completely upside down after just one single night? And so easily it did.

But I don't take it that easy, for I don't know it myself of what I should be feeling. For him.

I grew up learning how to hate him with the deepest hatred that bored a hole in my heart--a hole where the feeling so-called 'love' used to be. And I lost the ability to trust other people but myself, for I don't want to be hurt again. And so they called me an 'ice block'--stoic and cool from the way they perceive me from the outside. I never care. If they think I am an ice block, I'll be an ice block. Because an ice block never feels...so it's never hurt.

"Forgive me." I think I heard him saying that but I am not sure if I was hallucinating it, for I was dreaming back then--the sweetest dream I ever had. There were Otousan, Okasan, he and I, sitting around our large dining table, smiling and laughing altogether. The picture I have never seen for so long.

I raise a finger to my lips. I still remember the warmth that uses to be there. Even though it was so brief, I'm sure that it was really there. And I don't know what I should feel for him, for this time I can't trust even myself.

Do I still love him as a brother?

~*~*~

It was getting colder and colder as days passed. Golden leaves aged and bid the trees farewell, falling like golden rain that swayed here and there when touched by the wind. The very end of autumn.

The chaotic chuunin exam had ended with the life of the third Hokage who, like other Hokage, sacrificed himself for the sake of his beloved village and for his important people--everyone in Konoha. His life had gone but not his name. The name of the brave would remain in everyone's heart like his stone statue crafted in the great cliff.

Everything seemed to be in peace for a while...

"Hey, ero-sennin! Didn't you say you're going to teach me a new jutsu!?" Naruto yelled at Jiraiya, who was now doing what he liked to do: peeping.

"Yeah, yeah. I did." The white haired-sennin replied but he didn't move from his position. Not even bit.

The blond boy' s eyebrows twitched. "Then what the hell are we doing here!?"

"Calm down, boy. Calm down. I'll teach you right away after I'm inspired."

Naruto had come with Jiraiya to another town. The perverted sennin said he was going to teach him a new jutsu but what he did was the same: peeping. If he wanted the sennin to teach him, then he would have to wait like a good child, which he knew he wasn't. There's still a quicker, more effective way.

"Kagebunshin!" There appeared his clones and together all Naruto activated his infamous jutsu. " Sexy no Jutsu!"

Sure it worked since the perverted sennin could never ever denied a horde of nude, puppy dog's eyed-girls. And so the event went on.

Meanwhile...

Kakashi was waiting. It was the first time he had to wait for someone since he was always late. He was quite surprised when he asked Sasuke if he wanted to go on a date and the boy said yes. How long he had been in love with this beautiful raven-haired boy who had shut away his heart with unbreakable ice? How long had he been watching him days and nights?

Time didn't matter, for the thing that did matter was that he loved this boy.

He noticed Asuma and Kurenai walking together down the street, right toward his direction. They looked like two sweet love birds if he didn't know better. "Asuma, Kurenai, are you dating?" He greeted jokingly. Yet he thought he saw Kurenai blush slightly.

"No. We're just looking around." She said quickly.

"What about you, Kakashi? What're you doing here?" Asuma asked with suspicion. Sure it was strange as hell for Hatake Kakashi to wait for someone.

The silver-grey haired jounin shrugged. "I've an appointment..." Asuma raised his eyebrow, interested. "...with Sasuke." Kakashi finished.

~*~*~

I try so hard to forget. To erase him completely from my mind. I couldn't. Hatred or love, I know not but he's still there, in my memory, in my dream and in my heart where he has left a large hole. Yet there's one thing that I'm sure of is this longing feeling I have.

I long for him. That's the truth.

Missing and yearning to meet. I want to see his face. I want to hear his voice. I want to feel his touch... that gentle touch on my lips.

Freeze. I freeze as that thought come to me and as much as I yearn for it, I fear it. Greatly. This strange feeling I have. It's like...

I'm in love with him. My own brother.

Why does it happen? When did it happen? This forbidden feeling that makes me feel so dirty. Dirty and filthy I am that I want to forget everything. So I accept his offer, the silver-grey haired instructor that I've learned to trust.

I tell him I don't like the menu he orders. I know I act like a spoiled bastard. I know it's rude but he just smiles and asks me to sit down, so I can order what I please.

Sometimes it's nice to know that someone cares for me and I am not alone.

Still, I want to hear it from your mouth.

Itachi, do you still love me as a brother?

~*~*~

Kakashi's smile faded and turned into a deep frown after he had parted from Sasuke. He knew whom he was about to be dealing with. That person was too dangerous for even Asuma and Kurenai and even himself to handle. The true heir of the Sharingan.

He didn't know if Itachi had changed his mind but he wasn't going to wait and see...

~*~*~

"Hatake Kakashi." The Uchiha prodigy addressed him in his usual monotone voice--not a single trace of emotion was shown on his face.

"So you're the infamous Sharingan Kakashi. I heard you've encountered little Zabuza..." His shark-like partner, Kisame said, studying the jounin that had just arrived and saved his friends.

"I did." The jounin said, not losing his fighting stance as he studied Itachi's movement in order that he could be prepared for the Uchiha prodigy's attack. Yet Itachi didn't move. It was Kisame who had his Samehada at ready.

"If so, you're a worthy opponent." he said, showing his sharp menacing teeth.

"Stop, Kisame. You'll waste our time fighting this man. We've business to do." Itachi interrupted.

Kisame glanced at his stoic partner then nodded. "If you say so, Itachi-san."

"I'm not like Kisame. I don't take time." Itachi said, closing his eyes slowly. "You'll learn why the Uchiha clan is the most feared among fellow shinobi."

"Close your eyes! Don't look at him in the eyes!" Kakashi hurriedly warned Asuma and Kurenai. He knew what was coming next.

~*~*~

I stand alone in the vast and empty residence of my clan, looking at the list of the names of those once lived here, including him and me. The flame I've lit there flickers when touched by the wind. And my eyes were as red as the fire yet unflickering as I read every single name.

Tha-thump. Tha-thump. Tha-thump. Tha-thump.

My heart beats faster and faster that I could hear its sound ring clearly in my ears.

Tha-thump. Tha-thump. Tha-thump. Tha-thump.

It beats even faster as my gaze rest on his name. Uchiha Itachi. And I have this strange feeling... as if the darkness he has bored hole in my heart is stretching wider and wider.

Tha-thump. Tha-thump. Tha-thump. Tha-thump.

Frigid chill runs down my spine. I feel so freezingly cold for a sudden. Something terrible's happening. I begin to run. Funny. As if needing comfort from him, my legs take me to Kakashi-sensei's place.

~*~*~

"Kakashi-" Sasuke'eyes widened at the scence before him. "What happened?" Asuma turned but before he could say anything, the door burst open and a horrified shinobi ran in. "I heard Itachi's back! Is it true!?"

Itachi!?

"Damn." Asuma cursed as Sasuke ran out of the place.

~*~*~

"Grrr....that ero-sennin, I should have known he wouldn't keep his promise." Naruto grumbled irritably. "Train on your own, huh? Pretty woman is better than keeping his promise. I really should have known..."

Finally, he sighed in defeat and was about to start practicing when the doorknob turned with a 'click'. Naruto looked up and saw a pair of blood-red Sharingan eyes. Sasuke?

But when he had a better look at the uninvited visitor, he realized it wasn't his teammate. "Come with us, Naruto-kun." The stranger said.

"W-who are you?" The kitsune boy stepped back, taking a defensive pose.

Kisame snorted, tightening his grip around the handle of Samehada. "Look like this little kid has the gut to fight. Should I play with him?"

Yet before he could start anything he felt another presence there, behind his partner. Sharingan eyes stared straight at the back of his partner while Itachi stood there indifferent. "Another Sharingan? He looks an awful lot like you. Who's this kid, Itachi-san?"

"...My little brother."

Silence prevailed for while as all of them stood there, unmoving until Kisame spoke up. "But I heard that you have wiped out all the clan. What does this mean?"

~*~*~

He's here but it isn't like the same Uchiha Itachi I have shared a laugh with that night, for he seems so cold and distant like ice. The same ice that has gripped my heart and never melt away since the day he left years ago.

I want so much to ask but my lips were frozen. No word comes out and all I could do is just stare and stare and stare as the invisible dark hole widens and deepens, piercing into my soul.

"I love you."

Scream and cry. Blood was everywhere. Lives fleeted from their lifeless body, remaining only their names...

"Hate me."

Butterfly touch on the lips.

"Forgive me."

What's the truth?

Anger blazes inside me at how indifferent he is. And before I could even stop myself, I charge toward him with Chidori performed in one hand. Yet the attack is stopped easily by his iron grip on my arm. I glare at him icily as he pushes me against the wall.

Yet I melt as his burning lips devour mine.

TBC~Is this chapter too short? Well, I'm sure the next one will be much longer.

Yeah, you're right. This chapter is kind of following Kishimoto-sensei's story line. Kind of. I've changed something so that this story can fit in. But the next chapters aren't. So don't worry because Sasuke won't join Orochimaru's side. ^^

The monster is hungry. Feed it some cookies. NO FLAME PLEASE.