Author's note: OMG...has it really been 2 YEARS since I updated this?? Self-proclaimed Queen of Angst falls prostrate on her face to beg forgiveness from her loyal readers* I am soooo sorry. I started college and jobs and...had so many other fics going. And I just couldn't seem to get this chapter right. Truth be told..it's still not great in my opinion, but I finally got the plot elements fixed...that was the main reason why it took so long. I wrote this chapter over about..4 times before I finally got the idea for a Shadow Weapon. Onyx Weapon as I prefer to call it..or will call it in later chapters. So..for those of you who read this fic and have been waiting..I really do hope you can forgive me...now that I've got it figured out..it won't be so long between updates anymore. I do have a FFX-2 fic in the early stages…and a KH fic, and they're taking a deal of time, but I definitely will finish this fic. Probably in 2-3 more chapters. Provided I don't have a tough time with my American Lit. Term Paper...this could be done very soon. So thanks for waiting those that did..and please don't hate me or summon Heretic Aeons to rip me limb from limb... As always, I don't own any of this..except Onyx Weapon rest belongs to the game-gods that are Squaresoft. If you sue me, you'll get…whatever is in my pocket. That's..*counts*… thiry five cents.
Chapter Four
Absolution
I've walked so long I can't remember-Where was my home?
Their distant faces fade away I'm always on my own
I can show a smile, it's not hard to do
I can have the strength to go on
But sometimes I wanna let go of everything
-You're Not Alone-Escaflowne: A Girl In Gaea Soundtrack
Barret stared blankly down at the wooden table, "I don't know what happened, Cid."
Cid grunted, "Seemed pretty damn obvious to me. You hit her. Just what the hell were you thinking?"
"She said I'd forgotten! How the hell could I forget what they did to Corel, to my wife? Or especially Marlene? Tifa's never-"
Cid suddenly stood up, his eyes narrowed, "You'd better not finish that sentence or I'll beat the hell out of you myself. You're not the only one who lost family to Shinra. Those two had everything pulled out from under them while they were still kids. They were orphans at the age of sixteen. Their town was burned to the ground, and to top it all off, Sephiroth nearly killed them both at the Nibel reactor. Then Cloud becomes part of that damned sick freak Hojo's experiment, and Tifa ends up in the slums of Midgar, a place no girl should ever end up. They lost everything to Shinra; they're the last two people on this hunk of rock that would forget. Tifa...she's going through a lot of crap right now. I don't know if any of you have even noticed really, but...I've seen it. She's shattered inside. She's trying to hold it together on the surface, but she's already broken inside. And, hell, Cloud's trying to pick up the pieces while fighting off some disease that's killing him. If this goes on much longer, we're gonna end up burying them both, because if Cloud dies, I don't doubt for a minute that Tifa will kill herself." Cid's voice fell to a near whisper at that last, as he realized he had just admitted openly his deepest fear.
Barret stared at him for a moment, then slowly shook his head, "Damn...But what the hell were they thinking leaving like that? They're never gonna find the cure out there."
"I'm hoping they'll come back. Just give 'em time to cool off. But...about this Shinra operation...Are we going ahead with that?"
Barret nodded, "I've been working on the plans. I'm thinking in a few days we should be able to go. Finish this once and for all."
Cid shifted uneasily, "Without Cloud and Tifa? We're gonna need them."
"We'll wait for a few more days, if they don't show up, we'll just leave a message with one of the Elders. They'll follow."
Cloud quietly slipped into Tifa's room, watching her as she slept. The early morning sunlight filtered through the drawn curtains and fell across her face, illuminating it with a faint glow. As he stood there, she stirred and turned onto her side, a smile crossing her face in her sleep. He leaned over and gently kissed her forehead, then turned and left, closing the door behind him. Walking quietly so as not to wake her, he stepped out into the early morning of Nibelheim. The air had a chill to it, a chill he remembered well from his childhood. He pulled himself up to the platform of the village's well and leaned against the weather-worn wood, closing his eyes. Ever since he and Tifa had arrived in Nibelheim, he'd been feeling weaker as the days passed. Cloud knew that it was the poison, and that he was only getting worse, still he'd been hiding his weariness from Tifa. There was no use in making her worry now.
Tifa stretched and opened her eyes, "Cloud...?" She glanced around in confusion; she could've sworn she'd felt him kiss her a few minutes ago. She'd expected him to be lying next to her watching her sleep. He'd been doing that for the past few days, coming into her room early in the morning before she awoke and lying down next to her. Shaking her head, she quickly got dressed and went downstairs; Cloud was still nowhere to be found.
"Cloud?" she called into the silence. Finally her eyes caught sight of a figure sitting on the well. "There you are." she said, smiling to herself. She walked out into the sunlight, taking a moment to absorb the early morning chill that still clung to the air. Cloud's head was leaned back against the wall of the well, his brilliant sapphire eyes closed. Tifa frowned slightly at the worry that lined his face. Cloud... Hoping to comfort him, she climbed up next to him and lay her head on his shoulder. Cloud stirred at her touch, looking down at her.
"Tif..."
"Morning, Cloud."
He studied her face for a moment, and Tifa could see words he was holding back in his eyes. He suddenly turned away, returning his gaze to the pale blue sky. She lifted her head, "Cloud. What is it?"
"Nothing." he said quietly, reaching for her hand and giving it a gentle squeeze.
She stared at their clasped hands, then closed her eyes, "It's the poison, isn't it? It's starting to get worse."
Cloud didn't answer, instead he continued to stare at the ever brightening sky. He felt Tifa snuggle closer to him, felt her warmth envelop the hard, cold knot forming in his soul. He wanted to just hold her as close as he could, let her banish the darkness that was starting to claim him as its own, but he didn't. Tifa was only starting to regain hope. If she saw him crumble now, it would destroy her, and there would be no returning to the light for either of them.
"Cloud!" Tifa called into his ear.
He looked at her again, her eyes were warm pools of concern, "I'm okay, Tifa." he reassured her.
Her gaze returned to the troubled, uncertain look that it always was of late, and she let her head fall to rest under his chin. She gently pulled her hand from his and pressed it over his heart. Cloud reached up and lay his hand over hers.
I'm hurting her...I can see it. She knows something's wrong, and I keep lying to her....Lying to her. The only one who's ever really seen me for who I am, the only one who stayed by my side through it all. Forgive me, Tif. Please. I just don't want to lose you to the darkness I fell in. I'd never forgive myself if I left you in that hell thinking everyone and everything you ever knew would one day be gone.
Cloud was pulled from his dark thoughts by a gentle kiss on his cheek. Tifa was looking at him with a barely concealed sadness. Cloud reached out with his other hand and tenderly stroked her face, "Tifa..."
"I'll always be with you, Cloud. I promise."
He smiled sadly at her, "I know, Tif..." He leaned forward, gently brusing his lips against hers as he pulled her closer, holding her against his chest. *
The silence stretched on comfortably for many minutes before Tifa stirred again, "Cloud...let's go back...I think we all just overreacted that night, and...they're the only family I have. We all need each other. And we really do have to stop Shinra. I'm sure you'll be okay until then....right?"
He glanced down at her, his eyes seeming to stare through her at some distant point on the horizon, "I have to be." he answered simply.
Tifa's eyes widened as his words sunk in, "You mean-?"
A ghost of his cocky grin crossed his face, "We goin' back."
"Protector, I have had many strange dreams of late. Dark dreams with ill tidings. An enormous dark being rose from the very earth and destroyed entire cities. All was despair and pain...." Alex knelt in front of Nanaki, his head bowed in a show of respect for the last Protector of Cosmo Canyon, "I fear what these dreams could mean. The shape in my dream had the presence of a Weapon, and yet it was tainted somehow, wrong in the most fundamental way. It seemed as if it cared nothing for the defense of the Planet, but lived only to eradicate life. Surely the Planet...would not allow such a Weapon to exist?"
Nanaki climbed to his feet, his deeply intelligent eyes looking down at Alex's young form, "I know no more than you, but I also fear what this could bode. If you would, gather the other Elders and begin a search of the records for mentions of this Weapon, or for destruction on this scale. We may well be facing an enemy far worse than the remnants of Shinra."
Yuffie's flushed face suddenly appeared in the door from behind the heavy curtain that covered it. Her eyes glinted with excitement and barely contained happiness, "Red! Sorry to break your little meeting, but Spike and Tif are back! I spotted them coming back from Nibelhiem. They'll be here any minute!"
"Very well, Yuffie. I'll be there in just a moment." Nanaki couldn't help but chuckle as the young ninja disappeared as quicky as she had come, presumably to spread word to the others.
"I will do as you suggest at once, Protector." Alex said, drawing Nanaki's thoughts back to the mysterious Shadow Weapon. The young man bowed a final time, then left the room immediately.
"Perhaps Shinra's activity activated a lost Weapon...I should discuss this with the others, it may be that we will have to face this beast soon as well."
As he slipped out into the crimson light of the setting sun, he could see Cloud and Tifa just arriving, Cloud tying Renon and Cerasi to a post near the gates. Yuffie was already there to greet them, hopping about energetically in her usual manner. He began the long descent down the cliffs to the lowest levels of the village as Cloud, Tifa, and Yuffie began to climb up.
"Nanaki!" Tifa cried, waving at him as she spotted him coming toward them. There was an unmistakable sense of relief in her eyes, the razor edged anger that had filled them only days before had disappeared without a trace. He nodded to indicate he had heard her, and waited patiently as they made their way to him.
"Cloud, Tifa. I see you decided to return." he said quietly, staring at them both in turn.
Tifa smiled faintly, "Yeah. We need to apologize to Barret...things...are just so...I think we all just overreacted. Shinra is the enemy here, and if we start fighting ourselves now, then we'll never win. And I won't let the Planet fall to them again. Everyone that died before...it would all be in vain if we let that happen. Besides...you guys...we're a family. Maybe we're a strange one, but we're a family nonetheless."
"What of Cloud's poisoning?" Nanaki asked, his head tilted slightly, making him look almost human for a moment.
"I can deal with it. The cure can wait until this is over. There's time, and we have to use it." Cloud replied, his sapphire eyes hard with determination.
Nanaki nodded slowly, "Yes...there is another matter that one of the Elders has just brought to my attention. I believe we should call a meeting. This could be worse than Shinra..."
Cid leaned back, crossing his arms over his muscular chest, "A what now? What d'ya mean some kinda Shadow Weapon?"
Nanaki shook his head, "I know nothing more than what Alex could reveal. He said it was a great Weapon, dark and somehow seemed to be different from the other Weapons. It wanted nothing more than to slaughter all mankind."
"And the difference is where? Sounds just like the other ones to me." Yuffie scoffed, "Ultima, Emerald, Ruby, Diamond, they all ran around blowing up things, killing people, ruining villages. It was Ultima's arrival that upset the Lifestream at Mideel, right? Nearly killed Spike and Tifa...Answer seems simple to me. We knock it's block off like we did the rest."
"No...this one...it more powerful than that. It is corrupted. The other Weapons fought to save the Planet. At the time the Planet was beginning to see mankind as a threat. But it doesn't any longer...or else we would not have been spared when Lifestream rose to destroy Meteor. This Weapon not only awakened late, it clearly doesn't follow the Planet's call. It seeks destruction for destruction's sake. And while this Weapon hasn't awakened yet, it is stirring. I have felt it in the Planet. A dark awareness watching, waiting..."
"You think maybe Shinra woke it up?" Cloud interjected from his spot against the wall. Exhaustion was beginning to show on his face, the inexorible drain of Jenova's poison continuing with no cure yet in sight.
Nanaki nodded, and began pacing as he spoke, "I believe they played the largest role, yes. And this Weapon may well attack while we are at Neo-Midgar. So the question now is, do we continue with our plan to raid the island?"
Barret shifted, clearly uneasy as memories of their last meeting flashed in his mind. After a long moment of silence, he finally spoke, "I don't see why not. It may be months before that Weapon wakes up. Or maybe it never does. We can't wait on that, Shinra has to be stopped now before they regain full strength."
Cid looked over his shoulder at where Cloud stood, "Think you can hold out, kid?"
Cloud nodded, flashing his trademark cocky grin, "'Course. I'll be fine. It's not that bad yet. And waiting here doesn't seem to be doing any good anyway. Barret's right. We wait, and Shinra only gets stronger. We have to end this here, now, and if the Weapon awakens, we can handle it then."
"Very well." Nanaki said, "I have set the Elders to researching the Weapons for the time being, and the village is in no danger that I can foresee, so I will accompany you to Neo-Midgar."
Barret climbed to his feet, meeting the gazes of each member in turn, "Okay, then we're leaving tomorrow. Anyone who wants out, say so now. I know we've all got our reasons, and this could well be a suicide mission for some of us." He let his gaze fall on Cloud and Tifa for a prolonged moment, until Tifa lifted her chin in resolution.
"Cloud and I already decided....this fight is more than us...we're in."
"Aw...come on, Barret. We've all been through so much already, you know we're all in. Do you even have to ask anymore? Geez...let's just go find something to eat already. I'm starving...all you fogies ever do is talk...I'm outta here." Yuffie rolled her eyes as she climbed to her feet and scampered out the door in search of food.
A collective chuckle rose from the group as they watched her go.
"She's right..there's nothing to talk about. No way any of us are gonna bail now, so why ask? I'm gonna run a check on the Highwind before we leave. Let's all just...relax as much as we can before we go, eh?" Cid flashed them all a wry grin, then slipped outside.
Cloud laughed and slid an arm around Tifa's waist, "That food Yuffie mentioned sounded good...how about we go find it?"
Tifa returned his smile, and rested her head on his shoulder, "Sounds great."