****Note: Yes I know that all these characters and more belongs to Rumiko Takahashi. She is a god send to us all!!!

When I Thought I'd Lost You

Ch.6

Mousse had been awake for hours yet, he couldn't do anything. He'd known he'd been awake for a few hours at least because he had seen light appear and rise through cracks in the window blinds. He couldn't sleep anymore, so he laid there with his eyes closed, picturing old memories of Shampoo and their life back in China.

Mousse then heard footsteps cross his room quickly and then stop. He instantly thought "Maybe its Shampoo!" Opening his eyes and putting on his glasses, he saw a nurse throw open the window shades of his room. As the bright light shined in, Mousse shaded it from his eyes and sighed sadly as he had wanted to see Shampoo again. The nurse turned around abruptly as she heard him sigh and her eyes widened with shock.

"Oh my...you're awake. The girls told me you woke up last night, but I didn't believe them. I've been coming in here everyday since you were put on my rounds." The nurse nervously prattled on not letting Mousse get a word in, "I didn't really think that it was true when I came in here and saw that you were still there, laying on your bed...seemingly asleep. I'm so sorry, I'll close the blinds here..."

She turned around and grabbed the blinds, trying to quickly close them.

"No, no, it's alright. I should get up. I haven't been asleep for hours and I was getting restless. I just needed something to get me up."

"You, sure?" The nurse stopped in mid-pull on the blind.

"Yeah, but there is one thing, though..."

"What?"

"What do you have for food around here? I'm starved."

The nurse relaxed a bit and smiled at Mousse and started to walk out of the room.

"You're just lucky that I do the breakfast rounds here. I'll get you something to eat in a second."

"Thanks, hey?"

"Yeah?" She paused at the door.

'Have you seen a girl around lately? Chinese dress, purple hair, usually with two buns on top?"

"Purple hair? Hmmm....do you mean the girl who talks brokenly and sometimes skips into Chinese?"

"Yeah! Thats her! Have you seen her?"

"Sorry, but not recently. I used see her here every morning too...weird. I wonder why she isn't here."

"Every morning? What do you mean?"

"Well, she was here every morning before I came in to do check ups. A real dedicated girl she was. Never left your side for a moment whenever she spent the night here, and it was hard enough work for that old woman to get her to leave. I remember coming in one morning to find her here asleep by you r bed. It was so cute too, how she had fallen asleep holding onto your hand. Oh well, I had better get going. Food will be here soon."

The nurse quickly left the room and her steps faded down the hall.

"Held...my hand? Shampoo held my hand?"

"Come on! You gotta let us see him!"

Surrounding the doctor, the whole group of friends pressed onto the doctor to see Mousse, since Shampoo had called them all in the morning and told them he had woken up that night, they were all eager to finally see their friend alive and healthy.

"I'm sorry, but you can't all barge in there at the same time. Remember he's still recovering."

Ranma rolled his eyes at the doctor and crossed his arms.

"He's been recovering for two weeks! I think it's about time for him to get active!" Ryoga said as he too crossed his arms angrily at the doctor.

Akane shook her head at the way the conversation was heading, which was no where. She stepped forward and took the doctor off to the side, "Listen here doc, I know you think this is all in the best interests for Mousse, but it's not in the best interests for you. You don't know what happens when those guys get really mad." The doctors face blanched and Akane knew he was believing her, " They get really angry and then have a fight. Now do you want to maybe be thrown into a fight between those two guys or just let us all into Mousse's room." Akane innocently looked at the now pale white doctors face and he just slowly nodded his head before he turned around and walked away from the group.

"What did you say to him, Akane?" Ranma said as he had eyed the conversation warily.

"Oh just the truth, really. I told him that if he didn't let us go, you two would start fighting and then probably destroy him and the hospital."

"We haven't destroyed any..." Ryoga started to say, before he caught the look from the rest of the girls in the group, which was very menacing. "Well, maybe we have destroyed a few things, but we wouldn't fight now."

"You guys fight for no reason whatsoever, so why make up a reason now for it. Come on, we might as well see how Mousse is doing, before that doctor changes his mind." Akane grabbed Ranma's wrist and pulled him with her down the corridor. They were closely followed by Kasumi and Nabiki.

"Well, sugar, shall we head off?" Ukyo said as she put a hand on Ryoga's shoulder. He turned to face her and nodded, turning another 90 degrees he headed off and walked right into the women's bathroom. "We have gotta do something about that boy." Ukyo said as she shook her head and made her way inside the bathroom to save the poor soul from the magnitude of women's screams.

Mousse had absently been flipping though a book that the nurse had brought in along with others. She had mentioned something about having a lot of free time. The book was called The Lathe of Heaven. About some small nothing man who was able to change anything in the world he wanted by dreaming it and it would be so.

"Wish I could dream like that. Then all my dreams would finally come true. Stuff like this wouldn't happen to me or anyone else for that matter."

Mousse looked at the empty chair beside his bed and envisioned Shampoo there beside him, smiling happily and beautiful as ever.

"Wish my dream about Shampoo would come true too..."

Suddenly the door to his room flew open and he watched as the group of six entered his room. The girls were instantly by his beside.

"Mousse, we're so relieved that you're awake!"

"You took a real turn for the worst getting that tumor and all."

"We're just glad you're still with us."

"We've missed you so much. Life hasn't been the same without you around."

Mousse sat in total shock as he watched the four girls talk non-stop to him. He could hardly get a word in edgeways.

"You guys were worried about me?" Mousse managed to say when the girls stopped for breath.

"Why wouldn't you think that we'd worry about you? We're all friends, right?" Ranma said as he stepped in between Akane and Kasumi.

Mousse adjusted his glasses, "Well, I guess I never thought that you'd guys would really be friends with a guy like me. Especially after everything I've done to you in the past."

"Well sugar, you've grown on us. Heck you were always around when I came here. I think it wouldn't be that same place with out you around." Ukyo said as she slapped Mousse on the back, not noticing the small wince of pain from Mousse.

"And we missed fighting with you, Mousse!" said Ryoga.

"Thanks guys. It's good to know that some one cares about me. Although I don't know what I'm going to do now."

"What do you mean? You'll be up in no time and then we'll be fighting all over Nerima again like usual!" Ranma said.

"That's where you're wrong, Ranma. I don't think I'll be fighting any more."

The room stopped and everyone said as one, "WHAT?"

"You're giving up fighting? How could you give that up?"

"Does this mean that you're giving up on Shampoo too?"

Mousse took a deep breath and looked at everyone in the room.

"No I haven't given up on her...It's just...I've been thinking a lot about my health and what happened to me. Fighting took over my life and now it could be my breaking point. Fighting ruined my health, so I have to stop fighting!"

"Mousse! You can't mean this! What'll your tribe say? What'll you do with your life afterwards? What about Shampoo?" Akane burst out saying.

"I don't know, but I can't keep on with this lifestyle if it doesn't amount to anything."

"But you have been getting better and stronger, Mousse. I feel it in you when ever we fight." Ranma said impulsively.

"But do I win Ranma? No, you do and with your victory, you also get stronger. I never have enough power to beat you and I never will. There's no point in me fighting anymore."

Nabiki spoke up, "You can't be afraid to die just because of something happening like this. You've gone through worse."

"I'm not afraid to die. I never was when I fought and I never will. I would have happily died fighting if it was for Shampoo...but what will dying for futile efforts get me? If Shampoo isn't going to care for me or be there for me then I..." Mousse trailed off and stared down at the bed.

"But Mousse, Shampoo-" Ranma started to speak, but when he caught a death glare from Akane bearing down on him, he knew to shut-up about her for the moment.

"Mousse, you can't just give up on this-"

"Yes, I can! It's my decision. Now please leave. I want to be alone."

"Mousse-"

"GO!" The room stood in silence for a moment before turning and walking out of the room.

"Fine, but we still believe in you. Even if you think it's for nothing." Ryoga said as he trailed the group, leaving Mousse alone once more.

"How can you believe in someone who doesn't even believe in himself?" Mousse said to the empty room.

***The book I mentioned earlier, The Lathe of Heaven, was written by Ursula K. Le Guin. It was a book I had to read in a Science Fiction class. I thought that the character of George Orr worked well with how people wish that they could change the world to how they dream it to be. I suggest to all you people that you go out and read this book. It is a great read!