The next day we all drove out to Boston, Tony's hometown. I seriously tried to get into a different car from Michael, but somehow we were put next to one another. I do believe that was Lilly's doing.

"So um...happy birthday, by the way. I sent you a virtual greeting but I really don't think you even looked right? You probably have like a servant or something read them and respond, right?" he asked carefully.

I stared at him. I hadn't even known virtual greetings were sent out by the public via the internet. I didn't want to sound stuck up though. "Well, I got a lot of them so I dunno...maybe when I go home I'll take a look...but uh, thanks." Why were things so damn weird now? I hated this weirdness we had now. I hated the sideways glances we offered one another as we spoke. We couldn't even look at one another in the eye.

Maybe he was embarrassed about the album. I mean, they must have made it well before all this crap happened between us. I bet he wished he hadn't sent it to me. I won't bother mentioning it to him then.

"No problem. So I hear you'll be tossing the first pitch at the game on Friday night?" he asked.

I got a call from the Red Sox asking if I would throw out the ceremonial first pitch on the game that we are going to on Friday night. I agreed, only because the Red Sox are big supporters of the Jimmy Fund (which raises money for cancer research). "Yeah, it'll only be mildly embarrassing."

"Nah, you'll be fine. M-Maybe we could practice this week. I mean, I'm not really the best at baseball but I think I might be able to help you a little bit."

I smiled a little. Maybe we could be friends. "I'd like that a lot, Michael. Thanks."

We talked a little bit more, only neutral topics though. I told him all about Dad's official coronation. He mentioned a trip he was going to take for the summer. Now that the album was finished they all had a little time off before they had to tour again. He was going somewhere in Europe, but wouldn't say where. I guess he was trying to be mysterious.

At some point I fell asleep on his shoulder. He fell asleep too. We were both woken up by a flash of a camera. "Welcome to Bah-ston," Tony said, laying his accent on really thick.

I glared at him. I hate being woken up like this...so suddenly. I mean, I was damn comfortable where I was. Cuddled up on Michael's shoulder. With his arm around me. We are going to be friends. That is all we will ever be.
We (well, me and the other bridesmaids that were there), tried on the bridesmaid dresses that Sebastino designed and made for no cost, it was his gift to my 'little friend'. The dresses were slim and a light shade of purple, Lilly's favorite color. I remember when she hated it, but whatever.
We were staying with Tony's family in the South End of the city.
Michael approached me on Monday afternoon, the first chance he got.
"Wanna go for a walk?"
I shook my head. The less time I spent with him the better. Even if we were going to be friends. Too much time would make me go crazy because I loved him so damn much and he didn't love me anymore.
He sighed. "Duck tour?"
"What's that?" I asked, confused.
"Come on, I'll show you," he offered, sticking out his hand.
"Wait. Let me get Tina."
He sighed again. He must be annoyed by me.
We took the green line to the Prudential Center where the tickets were sold. I hadn't really been to Boston before so it was all kind of cool. The Pru (as the locals called it) was a mall, but also an office building. The tallest one in the city in fact. It wasn't like the New York skyscrapers, but the Bostonians do what they can. The city actually reminded me a little of Genovia, but only a little bit. It had so many old buildings thrown around.
We bought the last three tickets on the 'boat'. I was expecting a real boat ride, but that wasn't it at all. We were on this car like thing in the shape of a boat. We were driven around the city, given a tour of it by a man dressed as a colonial patriot. We were given 'quackers' and were encouraged to quack at the people as we drove by them. Michael made a point to do this. Tony had told him that it was something that annoyed the locals almost as much as the boats themselves (a/n, yes, they are very annoying! I've almost been hit SEVERAL times by them, also, me and my friends got some cat calls from it).
"That was fun," I said laughing.
He put his hand on my waist nervously. I pulled away casually, picking up the pace. If we were to be friends we could not act flirty. We couldn't blur the lines of friendship.
"We are meeting everyone at the Cheesecake Factory, right?" I asked.
"Yeah, it's right down the street. Afterwards a bunch of us are going to Dick's Last Resort for a few drinks if you want to come."
"Dick's?" I said with a laugh.
"It's pretty cool. We went to the one in Nashville when we were on the road. You get to make condom hats."
"Huh?" I asked with a laugh.
"Out of paper. It's easier to see rather than to explain."
"I'll go," Tina offered.
He shrugged, "Sure. Why not?"

MICHAEL:

So, basically the only one on one time I've had with the love of my life is in the back of a Dodge minivan. For six hours though...four of which were spent sleeping...with her in my arms again. Maybe things would work out for us...maybe.

Okay, so the plan was to just bring Mia to Dick's, but Tina screwed that up. Like she screwed up the duck boats. I was really starting to hate the girl. Well...hate is a bit strong, dislike is more like it. I needed to talk to Mia about what happened two months ago. I hadn't mentioned it in the car because we weren't exactly alone and I needed to get her trust back a little bit.
We ate dinner with about twenty other people. Mia sat at the opposite end of the table, near Lilly and her friends from high school.
"Take a picture, it lasts longer," Larry said with a laugh. I had been staring at her without even realizing it. I am now one of those creepy guys that girls hate.
We went to the bar and I could SWEAR she was shooting a dirty look at this girl who was talking to me. So I did the same with some guy who was trying to put the moves on her.
I walked over to her, "Can I get you a drink?"
"Dude, I'm talking to the girl," he guy says to me.
I ignore him.
"May I?"
She smiles, "Sure. Sidecar."
I winked at her and she smiled appreciatively.

We left at last call that night, all were very much hammered thank you very much. We stumbled into three different taxis. I'm sure Tony's family will appreciate a bunch of drunks coming in at three in the morning.
Mia was on my lap in the taxi. Our faces were really close to one another. She started giggling, "I've never been this drunk before!" she admitted to me.
I kissed her nose, "Welcome to the world of idiocy."
"Thanks for saving me from that guy," she said. She started kissing my neck. I looked at Larry, who was flirting Shameeka.

"Mia, what are you doing?" I asked softly so they wouldn't hear me.
"Kissing you," she giggled.
"Why?"
"Because you taste nice," she said, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. And in the cutest possible way.
It took all of my will power to hold back from kissing her back. Or from letting myself enjoy it too much. She was drunk. She had no idea what she was doing. "Mia, you don't want to do that," I whispered.
She started sucking on my neck, it felt nice, but wrong at the same time. "Mia, stop. You are drunk."
"Michael, I want to..." she purred into my ear.
"I said no, Mia. Maybe some other time, when we're both sober."
She pouted. I normally couldn't resist the pout but tonight was different. "No."
I walked her to her bed and woke up when she started throwing up. I held her hair back for her. She was up half the night throwing up I wondered if she even remembered kissing me, or giving me this hickey on my neck. I don't even think I have ever had a hickey before. I've always thought of them as infantile, but I never stopped Mia from giving it to me. Maybe it'd show her something in the morning. Make her remember how she really felt. If she did feel that way still.
The next morning I was the first to wake up. I was probably in the best shape out of everyone who went out last night. I made some pancakes and waffles for everyone. I learned a lot from Maya when I was younger. I wondered what she was doing now. I know, yet another random thought from the mind of Michael Moscovitz.
Lilly woke up once she smelled the pancakes, she looked at the pan, then at my neck, "Someone have fun with the vacuum cleaner last night?"
"No," I said quietly.
"Mia was sucking on his neck last night," Larry said coming into the room.
I glared at him.
Lilly started laughing hysterically. "Michael, she was drunk! Why'd you take advantage of her like that?"
"I didn't. I could have easily taken advantage of the situation, but I didn't. Okay?"

Larry was staring at the sports page of the Boston Herald. I flipped a pancake. "Did you want M & M's in yours?" I asked.

She shook her head. "Michael, did you and Mia sleep together?" she asked.

I was about to say yes, back after her senior prom, but Lilly cut me off. "In recent times I mean. Not that night you stole her virginity."

I swallowed hard. How could she know? I thought Mia never told.

"Oh don't look so surprised. She only told me like, two years ago or something. She was over my place once when she was home visiting her mom and then you showed up with the other guys for Tony. She and I snuck out while you guys looked at the elevators or something."

I suddenly remembered that night. I had smelt Mia (don't I sound psychotic?), her hair had a distinct aroma to it that no one else possessed. "Oh, I see."

"Besides, I had a good idea about it anyways."

"How?" I asked.

"You know that face you made oh about, two days after her sister was born?"

"Sorry, don't keep tabs on that stuff," I replied.

"It's this goofy, ' I just had the best time in the world' face. You only had that expression one other time before that, after my prom. Which brings me to my next point."

I rolled my eyes, "Which is?"

"Were you two officially together, or just ya know...friends with benefits? Because I'll tell you now, that never works, the whole benefits thing. At least one of the people feels more for the other and they end up being heart broken-"

"Lilly, we had it under control."

"So why are you two acting like nothing ever happened? Why'd it stop? Why didn't you just be together? It's kind of clear to everyone else around here that you two are crazy about one another."

"Oh?" I asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Duh. I mean, I always knew there was something with you two, even when we were back in Genovia and Joshua was alive. You two quoted all the right spots of Star Wars together. Joshua even saw it. I mean, it's not like you two were intentially doing anything, but it was kind of obvious to those who know you well enough to know that you were in love with her and she was in love with you."

"Key words though, Little Sister, she was in love with me."

"Oh please Michael, you know she still is. She just isn't self actualized enough to realize it. She's stil stuck in the past worrying about how it'd look if she was with another man so soon after Joshua. She doesn't want to disgrace his memory. ANd that bitch that was his mother would have a field day, selling stories and making up lies about how you and Mia were carrying on an affair."

I realized something through her ramblings. She had asked if we had slept together, and yet I never answered. And she never bothered to ask again. Or had I answered? I ran through the conversation in my head as she continued on about how Mia is too immature to realize that she is only twenty five and shouldn't be acting like a widow.

How had she gotten me to admit that we'd been sleeping together, without my actually saying that we had been? I mean, I insinuated but nothing more.

"Don't you agree?"

"Huh?"

"Michael, you are the best man. She is the maid of honor. Use these positions to make things right again, okay?" Lilly said, biting into her pancake.

I nodded. What had she been talking about while I was off in la la land?

"Yeah, I need to go shower," she said finally, tired of lecturing me.

"Yes you definately do. You smell like wet dog," I teased. That was an old joke she and I used to say to one another when we lived with my parents.

She gave me a half smile and then hugged me, "I'm glad we've become friends, Michael," she admitted. "I couldn't go through all this without you."

I kissed her forehead, "Go bathe before Tony smells you and changes his mind."

She laughed and smacked the back of my head. "Don't be so mean."


Lilly left to use the bathroom.
I looked at Larry and his stupid grin. "You and Shameeka huh?"
"Hey, what can I tell ya? She digs the ugly ones."
"True," I teased.

Mia walked into the kitchen hours later. "Water..."
I smiled and handed her my bottle of water. She gulped it down.
"Here's some left over pancakes, cold just like you like 'em."
She smiled slightly. "No more drinking for Mia."
I mussed her hair. "Okay, I'll make sure you don't drink."

She left and took a shower. I thought of how I should talk to her about us. Just as I was about to go crazy she came into the kitchen.
"Where is everyone?"
"The girls went to Fanieul Hall to shop and have lunch. The guys went to take a tour of Fenway Park"
"Why didn't you go with them?"
"And leave you all alone?" I asked casually.
She smiled. "I-I didn't do anything stupid last night, did I?"
I looked past the paper at her, "No, not at all."
"Did I do that?" she asked, looking at my neck. Almost hopeful.
I nodded. "Yeah, no big deal," I said, looking away.
She sat down next to me. "So are we just going to avoid the topic all together?"
I folded up the Boston Globe. "What do you want me to say?"
Her lip quivered. "I don't know..."
"Well then I don't either. You never let me explain back in March. I wanted to tell you about that girl..."
"You don't even remember her name!" she accused.
"Because it was a God damn one night stand! Not even that!" I yelled, getting frustrated.
Her eyes started watering.
I calmed myself down. "Sorry. I didn't mean it like that. We, I...was really drunk and I did something stupid. I don't even remember it, honest. I just woke up the next morning and there she was."
I took her hand that was lying on the table. "I swear."
"Why did you do it?"
"I was being stupid and I was drunk. I should never drink too much, I can't control what I do when I drink. But I know we didn't sleep together...not in the way you are thinking. We didn't have sex."
She brushed her thumb against my hand for a few minutes. "I guess I can understand. I mean, I should not have been mad in the first place, I guess."
"Yes, you had every right to be mad," I cut in.
She looked at me carefully, taking in all of my features. "No, I didn't. I never told you how I was feeling. How much I-"she cut
herself off and looked deeply into my eyes.
"You what?" I asked, encouraging her to go on.
"Michael, let's not cloud over our friendship anymore, okay? Let's just be close friends. No more 'fun' okay?"

I know she was going to say 'how much I love you', but what stopped her? Why wouldn't she look at me in the eye and say this?

I stared at the oak table. "If it's what you want then fine."

"It is," she said quickly, trying to convice not only herself but me too.

"Then fine. We'll be great friends," I said taking her hand again, "But I meant what I said in the liner notes, if you read them."

She stared at me. She knew exactly what I meant.

"And I always will mean that. Always."