Disclaimer: REALITY CHECK! We can't dig up Tolkien's grave and retrieve the deeds to LoTr! [Readers: o.O] Well anyway, WE OWN NADA! NOTHING!
Uruviel: Now please strap on your seatbelts for one hell of an insane chapter!
Nienna: [o.O] What is up with you dude?
Uruviel: Excuse moi mademoiselle, I need to type the fucking story!
Nienna: keep it cool man...Yo' dudes like forgive Uruviel for like acting weird like...
Readers: What the...?
Uruviel and Nienna: SO ON WITH OUR STORY!!!
Readers: Whatever...
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How the heck did we end up HERE?
Chapter 3: Randomness 101!
(sub title: Can a muse talk to the authoress? o.O)
"OK TheCheeseturkey doesn't own you so remember that but she does own the plot that made this story" Jessie told the elves and hobbits and dwarves listening to her tell the story 'The Day School got TwIsTeD' by TheCheeseTurkey and whenever Gimli's name was mentioned, Gimli would tell his father, Gloin this "Look dad! I'm in a story!"
Elladan looked at Nadi that was forcing him to teach her elvish. "I'm so going to kill Elrohir for this..." he thought. Then Elrohir came naming towards them. Elladan took a whole hour telling Nadi that he WASN'T Elrohir and for once Nadi believed him. "Elrohir!" Nadi said Elrohir stared at her. "Busted...!" Elladan said to Elrohir happily.
Jessie was telling them about TheCheeseTurkey then suddenly a balloon popped out of no where and Jessie grabbed it then popped it and Elrond came running into the room, "OK just like we practiced we all go to the emergency exit and the bomb's fire will spread... soon?" he said then Jessie went to him and got his hair and pulled it and looked for her handy dandy Agent Smith glasses and dundundun... Lord Elrond was Agent Smith! So Jessie got her mini walkie-talkie and put the earphone in her ear, "CODE RED! CODE RED! AGENT SMITH IS IN THE BUILDING!" she said into it then Nadi came cart wheeling to the door and they both got into their fighting stances then from above Neo came making a whole in the ceiling "So Mr. Anderson... You have new recruits... Well I must be getting out now..." Smith said but Nadi blocked his way out then he tried to go to Jessie's way but the elves and hobbits had their guns out then Smith looked up and he smiled then he flew up but Neo kicked him... in slow motion! "You can't escape this time..." Neo said through gritted teeth then Smith punched Nadi in the stomach then Jessie kicked his hand away then she tried to shoot him but he dodged it then she flipped back to where she was before then he tried shooting at her, the elves and hobbits ran to the sides but Jessie dodged them all then Nadi kicked Smith at his back then Smith fell down and Neo got him and a swirl of wind came, IT WAS A RED TORNADO! Then it sucked Neo and Smith inside it and Smith screamed "I'LL BE BACK!"
"Glad that's over..." Jessie said "Hey I didn't know you could do those stunts..." Nadi told her "Neither did I" Jessie told her and both of them laughed. "So...how did you learn to cart wheel?" Jessie asked "Dunno..." Nadi said. Then Arwen came then asked, "Where's Ada?" then there was a growl from the elves and a golden haired one stomped out of the crowd "Hi Glory!" Arwen said happily "Where is my horse?" Glorifondiel asked "um..." Arwen stammered then Glory tackled her then Nadi and Jessie jumped then looked at Arwen after Glory stood up then looked at her unconscious body and said "Ohhh..."
"Wow...you really KNOCKED her OUT!" Nadi said as Nadi and Jessie started to laugh hysterically. Glory smiled, pleased with himself. "Hey where is Lord Elrond?" Glorifondiel asked them. Just then Arwen woke up. "ADA!!!" She screamed then she saw Glorifondiel "I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!" Arwen said as she started to chase Glorifondiel. "AAK!" Glorifondiel shouted and ran away with Arwen running after him. Jessie and Nadi looked at each other with confused eyes. Then Elrond came falling from the ceiling. Nadi moved away then Jessie cart wheeled away. "OH PHULEAZE!!!" Nadi muttered "GOD, MS. AUTHOR WHY THE HELL DOES SHE CART WHEEL?!" Nadi shouts to the authors "WHAT THE...?", "What the hell? Uruviel who the hell are you talking to?" Nienna asks Uruviel. "Uhh...No one!" Uruviel says to Nienna. "Just shut up and I'll make you do something cool later...Do you want to kiss Legolas? Or maybe Elrohir? what do you want? Just leave me to write the story..." Uruviel said to Nadi. "Whatever...sure... I like Legolas more...but make me learn how to speak elvish! Then I'll leave!" Nadi said to Uruviel "Okay sheesh!" Uruviel said "Uruviel! The making is about to start!" Nienna shouted. Uruviel scowled. "Okay peeps, on with our story..."
"May it be An evening star Shines down Upon you May it be When darkness falls Your heart Will be true You walk along a road Oh how far you are from home" Nadi sang "Mornië utúlië [Quenya: 'Darkness has come'] Believe and you Will find your way Mornië alantië [Quenya: 'Darkness has fallen'] A promise lives Within you now" Jessie sang "May it be The shadow's call Will fly away May it be A journey on To light the day." Nadi sang "Mornië utúlië [Quenya: 'Darkness has come'] Believe and you Will find your way Mornië alantië [Quenya: 'Darkness has fallen'] A promise lives Within you now A promise lives Within you now..." Jessie sang. "CAN YOU STOP SINGING THAT SONG?!" One elf said "YA!PIPE DOWN!ELVES ARE TRIYING TO SLEEP HERE!" another elf said "SLEEP?!" Jessie shouted back. "YES!SLEEPING!" the two elves that shouted "SLEEPING?!SLEEPING IS FOR OLD FARTS!" Nadi shouted "YA SLEEPING IS FOR OLD COOTS!" Jessie added. Then they went outside then Jessie saw a..."MONKEY!!!" Jessie screamed and ran after it. Nadi was left in the dark then someone/something touched her. Then Nadi started to scream. "Shh...Shh...will you keep quiet? I'm trying to get back at someone..." The person told her but Nadi kept on screaming madly like a freaking maniac, then Legolas said, wait no... PLEADED, "Will you please SHUT UP?" but Nadi was about to yell for Jessie then Legolasiel did something that no one ever, ever expected... HE KISSED NADI! [Nadi: YAY!] [Uruviel&Nienna: AAAAAAAAH! How'd you get here?] [Nadi: Dunno... (disappears back into the story)] [Uruviel&Nienna: o.O] But the excitement ended when Jessie saw the two then she screamed "I'M GONNA TELL THE WHOLE WORLD!" while pointing at Legolasiel then his eyes grew big and Jessie started running and Legoboy followed her What happened to Nadi? We dunno... Anyway, Jessie ran through the garden of pineapples, through the land of flying pigs and cows, through the Shire [Uruviel: o.?] [Nienna: =D] and through the land of a thousand hoppable islands [Uruviel: o.? WTF?] [Nienna: =D] until Jessie used her magical monkey named Jack, to bite Legolas's ear then she ran as fast as she can to the land of Oz and followed the yellow brick road while singing 'Yellow Brickroader' by Michelle Branch and quoting Cameron Diaz saying "I'm following the yellow brick road, I'm following the yellow brick road, I'm following, I'm following, I'm following the yellow brick road" then she met a magic time traveling elf that happened to be Elladan and he transported her and himself to the stone age and she hid behind a big cave man and Legolas missed her then she transported to the time Elijah Wood was 11 and she swooned over him, took pictures, interviewed him and got autographs because he was so cute until Elladan told her that they have to go back to Rivendell and eat pie then she transported back to the real world and found DreaminofLorien's house and gave her Elladan and then Elladan fell in love with DreaminofLorien so he transported only Jessie back and Elladan lived happily ever after with DreaminofLorien while Legolas was asking Elijah where Jessie went Everyone ate pie when Jessie got back and Nadi ate pie too!!! [Uruviel: WTF? O.? This story's getting weird! Gimmie that keyboard! (grabs keyboard)] [Nienna: But it's RANDOM! (grabs mouse and clicks madly)] [Uruviel: STOP IT! (hits Nienna)] [Elves: CATFIGHT! CATFIGHT!] [Uruviel&Nienna: HOW'D YOU GET HERE?!] [Elves: Dunno... (disappears back into the story)] [Uruviel&Nienna: o.O] Jessie looked at Nadi. Then Nadi started to chase Jessie "YOU LITTLE ELF STEALER!YOU STOLE MY ELF!AND HE WAS ALREADY KISSING ME!!!!!!!!! roar..." Nadi shouted. Jessie gasped in her steps. "I'M NOT A ELF FANCIER!I'M A HOBBIT FANCIER!!!" She shouted to Nadi and the chase was on... [Nadi&Legolas: How come a hobbit's faster than us?] [Jessie: I am? I didn't notice!] [Legolas&Nadi: -.-] [Uruviel: Yeah Ninny!] [Nienna: Wha? (she is busy eating her banana given to her by a monkey to even notice them)] [Uruviel&Nadi&Legolas: -.-] [Jessie&Nienna: =D BANANA!!!] [Nienna: I WANT PIE!] [Nadi: hey Uruviel...what the fuck is wrong with your fucking co. author?] [Uruviel: I don't know...did you know I changed my pen name to: a- pirated-elf?] [Nadi: What the fuck? That's out of the fucking subject...!] [Uruviel: sorry! sheesh you are SO OA!] [Nadi: Oh don't talk to me about OA!] [Legolas: anyway...back to the story!] [Uruviel: Nienna is like to busy annoying her sisters friends...so the following plots are mine!] [Nienna: Hey why are you in a bad mood?] [Uruviel: Because you made me forget the fucking plot!] Nadi finally caught Jessie "MWAHAHAHA! NOW GIMMIE BACK MY ELF!" Nadi Shouted. Then Legolas came running "Jessie! You stole Legolas from me WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" Nadi screamed "She didn't steal me! If I was stolen I wouldn't be here!" Legolas said then Nadi glomped on Legolas and said "OOOOH IMISSED YOU SO MUCH MY LITTLE ITTY BITTY PRINCE OF MIRKWOOD!" Then Legolas said "I MISSED YOU TOO MY ITTY BITTY—""Wait? Why are you like acting nice to me?" Nadi asked Legolas. "I don't know...but I do know I LOOOOVE YOU!" Legolas replied. Then they went to eat supper with Jessie. Which by the way, Nadi glared at. Then Legolas sat across Nadi in a separated table "I SUDDENLY WANT TO KILL MYSELF..." Nadi half shouted half said in the hall. All the elves and hobbits looked at her. "WITH A FORK!" Nadi added half shouting and half saying again. Legolas looked at her "Aww...why aren't you eating my itty bitty looove bug?" Legolas asked her. Nadi was getting a bit ma and (unusually) happy about this [Uruviel: Hmm...I wonder if Nadi likes this...] [Nadi: WTF URUVIEL! I WANT ROMANCE!NOT NAMES AND CRAP!NOW I HAVE SPECIFIC DEMANDS...] [Uruviel: But he does love you doesn't he?] [Nadi: Crap Uruviel. I want ROMANCE!!!] [Uruviel: meep! Okay...but don't hurt me! Poor me! I helps you! Be nice to poor author!( Crawls before Nadi)] [Nadi: Whoa...OA much...] [Uruviel: now if you do hurt me...] [Nadi: OKAY deal!] [Uruviel: Too bad that will be in the next chapter...] [Nadi: WTF?] Nadi pushed the fork towards her chest then fell down then everyone went to look at her gasping "I can't believe you fell for that!" she laughed
TBC
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Nienna: OK that's it for now!
Uruviel: Tell us if it's random or not!
Nienna: In short review us!!!
Uruviel: And we'll see you next time!
Pippin: (pops out of no where) Why are you talking like hosts from AFV?
Nienna: I dunno...
Pippin: Oh... OK! I'm going to go to Merry... (walks away)
Nienna: Merry? MERRY?! I'M COMMING!
Uruviel: In case you haven't noticed, she created a sudden interest in Merry and Pippin, in short she's a HOBBIT FANCIER!
Nienna: [voice in the distance] Merry? Can I marry you?
Uruviel: o.O
Nienna: [voice in the distance] HEY FRODO CAN I MARRY YOU?!
Merry&Frodo: [voice in the distance] MAKE UP YOUR BLODDY MIND WOMAN!
Nienna: [screams] OKIE DOKEE! I'LL MARRY THE BOTH OF YOU!
Uruviel: o.O Well I got to go and try to convince Nienna that she can't marry 2 people! See You! (runs to Nienna, Frodo, Merry and Pippin)
Review Answers:
southerngirl4615:
Uruviel: uh oh...
Nienna: HYPER! HYPER! HYPER! HYPER! HYPER! HYPER!
Uruviel: Oh since she is strangely normal I want to find out how to make her... abnormal...
Nienna: [singing at the top of her lungs] AND EVERYTIME I SEE YOU IN MY DREAMS I SEE YOUR FACE...
DreaminofLorien:
Nienna: I gave Elladan to you and HE'S A MAGIC TIME TRAVELLING ELF!
Uruviel: HAVE FUN!
Confused Person:
Nienna: GREAT PEN NAME! THANKIES FOR REVIEWING! HAVE CHEESE! (gives CP cheese)
Uruviel: o.O
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Nienna: Oh yeah remember last night? We watched Harry Potter for the 2nd time and we annoyed the people around us!
Uruviel: We threw popcorn at the two people in front of us in the scene where it was snowing and whispered 'it's snowing' then we kept on whispering and we laughed real loud in the spider making Ron tap dance part
Nienna: And I chocked on my Iced Tea when Professor Trawnley made Harry and I jump and my heart beated really fast... Then we went to the arcade! AND I BEAT RUVIE IN EVERYTHING!!!
Uruviel: =(
Nienna: WELL BYE!