Millennium Dungeon
Chapter 2
Yami opened his eyes and found him-self face-to-face with a farmer armed with a pitchfork.
"Gah!"
"Oh brave adventurer at last you have awakened. Are you here to save our beautiful and humble town?"
"Adventurer? Town? Where am I?" Yami asked groggily, looking around. He was in the middle of a field of corn, too tall for him to see anything else.
"Hurry! The monsters are attacking the town!" And with that, the farmer dragged Yami off by the arm.
"Monsters? You mean like Duel Monsters? That's easy! I'll just get out my deck and-" Yami broke off to reach for his deck and do some fancy card work, only to find that instead of his deck there was a sword. "My deck! Where's my deck? And what is this?" He yelled, waving his sword around madly.
"Oh great." The farmer sighed, before turning to someone Yami couldn't see. "This one's a loony! Have you found anymore?"
"Sure have! Look at this one!" another farmer said as he came into the small clearing.
"Seto! Big brother! Put me down!" Mokuba squirmed in the other farmer's clutches.
Speaking of Seto....
Our handsome billionaire had woken up to find a girl sobbing on his chest.
"Please Master, come back to me! You can't leave me like this! Wake up!" The girl sobbed.
"Get off of me, you mangy peasant girl." Seto snapped, sitting up and pushing her off. The girl's eyes teared up even more.
"You're alive!" She hugged him, but pulled away before Seto could shove her off. "But peasant girl? After all we've been through? How could you say such a thing?" With that, she turned into a massive Silver Dragon. Unfortunately, she was still crying, and her tears were about the size of Seto's head. Seto gasped and drew back.
"You're a dragon?"
"You don't remember me? You hatched me and raised me from an egg! You named me when I was a tiny wrymling! After all we've been through!" she sobbed harder.
"I'm sorry, I must have missed something here."
"I know what must have happened! That last evil wizard we fought must have hit you with a spell that didn't take affect until a short time ago. And that's why you fell off, and why you don't remember me!"
"I didn't fall off of anything! What are you talking about?" The Dragon reached down and clutched Seto to her chest.
"Even if you don't remember me, you're still my Malhavoc!"
"Malhavoc? My name is Seto Kaiba; I'm CEO and owner of a multibillion- dollar corporation. Wait a minute, Malhavoc, I know that name!"
"Of course you do, it's yours! Do you remember my name?"
"Wait a minute, I'm – you're Ulharsaurivaussirdarastix!"
"You remember me!"
"No, I don't. That's the name of my dragon in D&D."
"What are you talking about? How could you forget me?"
"I couldn't forget you because you don't exist!"
"What a cruel thing to say Master, to your precious Ulharsaurivaussirdarastix!"
"You're not my precious Ulharsaurivaussirdarastix and I'm not your precious Malhavoc! I can't stay here any longer! I need to find Mokuba and get out of here!"
"Well, I can help."
Meanwhile, back in our favorite cornfield...
"Mokuba! Is that you?" Yami asked, trying to see how this short, stalking little man with a beard could ever look like Mokuba.
"Of course it's me! Have you gone blind Yugi?"
"No, I haven't. I was having trouble recognizing you behind that beard."
"I have a beard?" Mokuba looked down a shrieked. "I have a beard!"
"Of course you have a beard, you're a dwarf aren't you?" One of the farmers snapped irritably. "Now that you've had your happy little reunion, go save our town!"
"Maybe they're under the curse of an evil sorcerer! That's why they can't remember who they are, where they are, and if they're in the same party." The other one shrieked.
"But I wasn't in Yugi's party, I was with Seto, Ryou and Malik! But Malik got kind of weird." Mokuba said.
"Of course! He must have taken us to the Shadow Realm after that!"
"The Shadow what?" The first farmer said.
"Maybe they're not good adventurers after all, Jeb."
"I bet they actually are under some kind spell! We should get them some healing herbs from the Apothecary!"
"But what about our town?" A cheer was heard from the direction of the town.
"We're saved!" The townsfolk cried.
"I wonder what brave adventurer did that?"
"Let's go see!" So off the farmers went, dragging Yami and Mokuba, Yami by his arm and Mokuba by his beard.
"Er, ok." Yami said, while being dragged.
As they came into town, they saw a human barbarian standing atop a small pile of monsters, flexing his muscles.
"Joey?!" Yami exclaimed.
"Ah, hi Yug! I was just taking care of some business." Joey waved.
"Hail might adventurer!" The townsfolk cried. "What can you do for you, oh brave adventurer. Is there anything you want? Money? Food? Women? To be King? May we lick your shoes, mighty adventurer?"
"Kind of makes you sick, doesn't it?" Mokuba said under his breath.
The townsfolk lifted Joey on to a throne and proceeded to carry him about the town, while servant girls fanned him with palm leaves.
"Ahh, this is the life." Joey sighed. One of the monsters, an ugly, tree-like thing, climbed its way to the top of the pile of its dead comrades and proceeded to violently curse at Joey in Sylvan.
"Damn you and all your descendents!" The tree-thing swore in a high pitched voice.
"That thing is talking!" Yami said, horrified.
"No it's not." Mokuba looked at him. Meanwhile, the townsfolk were panicking.
"He's a demon! He speaks to them!" they cried.
"I vant to suck you blood, vah!" The creature shrieked as it jumped in the air, heading straight for Yami's throat. As it neared, Yami panicked and his reflexes took over. His drew his sword, and slashed the creature in half. He was sprayed with sap like blood as the creature fell to the ground.
"Our hero!" The townsfolk cried, as they dumped Joey off the throne and replaced him with Yami.
"Hail might adventurer!" The townsfolk cried. "What can you do for you, oh brave adventurer. Is there anything you want? Money? Food? Women? To be King? May we lick your shoes, mighty adventurer?"
"These townsfolk sure cry a lot, huh Joey?"
"My adoring fans! Come back to me!" Just then, a shadow fell across the town. The townsfolk held Yami over their heads.
"Save us from the impending doom, oh mighty adventurer!" Yami found him-self face-to-face with a large dragon. Its crested head gleamed silver in the sunlight. And blue eyes shone from beneath the horned brow. Yami shrieked and tried to scramble out of his throne, which was being held towards the dragon.
It landed majestically, and folded its wings to reveal a rider. Seto Kaiba slid off its back in a well-practiced manner.
"This isn't like you Yugi, cowering in the face of a simple dragon."
"I wasn't cowering! And how did you get a dragon? Why are you here?"
"I am here to collect Mokuba."
"Big brother! You're here, you're here!" Mokuba ran towards Kaiba, but tripped over his heavy armor and fell on his face. As he got to his feet, Kaiba walked forwards and grabbed Mokuba's beard.
"You have a beard." With that, he unsheathed his sword and proceeded to 'shave' Mokuba.
"My beard!" Mokuba squeaked. Kaiba threw the beard as far away as he could.
"You're coming with me." Kaiba told Mokuba, before dragging him off towards the dragon.
"But Master," Ulharsaurivaussirdarastix said, "I thought you hated dwarves!"
"Whatever I used to be, I'm not anymore! So give it up and get ready to go. We're leaving."
"What gives you the right to come in here, scare Yugi, grab Mokuba, shave him, and then ride off on your fancy dragon?" Joey yelled at the retreating billionaire.
"Wait a minute Kaiba, you can't just fly off like this! We're all here for a reason. I think this is some sort of game. We just need to find the end of it." Yami said.
"I don't need you!"
"That's what you always say, and how many times has Yugi saved your life?"
"No one asked your opinion, you Chihuahua."
"Oh yeah? You want to fight, huh, huh? I could kick your dragon riding a$$ any day!"
"Wait," Mokuba broke in, "Dragon-rider, dragon, rider. Pointy ear, elf. Beard, dwarf, axe. Mutt, nothing new. We're in D&D!"
"Very good Mokuba," Kaiba patted his little brother on the head. "It would seem that we are in some psychopath's campaign, and that we are all our D&D characters."
"Does that mean we're in a party together?"
"I hope not."
"So do I – Hey!"
"I wonder if everyone else is here too!" Yami interrupted the two.
What about our female compatriots?
Tea sat up and rubber her eyes. "Oh my head hurts." She moaned. Then she rolled over and found herself face-to-back with Mai Valentine. "Oh my God, Mai! Are you alive!" She poked her in the back. Mai moaned and sat up suddenly.
"What on earth am I wearing! There is absolutely no appeal in leather!" Tea sweat-dropped.
"Where are we?"
"I have no idea. But look, there's an Apothecary, we can go ask for directions."
"Oh, an Apothecary, sounds friendly enough." A pause. "What's an Apothecary?"
"Er, I guess we can ask that too."
What of Yugi and Tristan?
Yugi woke up, and found him-self sitting in the middle of a large crowd, which was jeering at a half-orc. The half-orc was wailing.
"Wait! What are you doing to me?! I don't want to die, don't lynch me!"
"That voice sounds oddly familiar." Yugi thought, "Wait a minute...Tristan!"
"Huh? Yugi! What are you doing here? Where are you?" Yugi stood up, but he still couldn't be seen because he was so short. A masked executioner stepped forward, and two large men came forward holding big drums. After a pause, they started to play a melancholy tune fit for the occasion.
"I'll save you Tristan!" Yugi cried, and tried to contact Yami.
/Yami? Do you have any good Dark Games for the occasion?/ A pause. /Yami? Yami? Are you there Yami? This is no time to be sleeping!/ Dead silence. Yugi glanced down anxiously.
"My puzzle! It's gone!" Yugi fell to his knees and began searching around the feet of the townsfolk. Somehow the rubbing of his hands against the floor and his murmuring of 'Where's the puzzle? Where's the puzzle?' caused a bright light to shine and a huge explosion. Yugi was thrown backwards, hit a wall, and then he knew no more. The number twenty floated over his head, and counted down to seventeen, before disappearing. A few yards over, a half-orc lay in a heap. The number fifty appeared over his head, before it counted down to forty-five and disappeared.
What of our evil bishonen?
"Akifia?" poke, poke, poke. "Akifia?"
"Go away," Bakura mumbled as he rolled over.
"Akifia, I really think you should wake up now." A familiar voice said.
"Perhaps he drank too much." A low, gruff voice suggested.
"I always heard albinos couldn't hold their liquor." A female voice said. Bakura shot straight up, scatter empty pints everywhere.
"What are you talking about? I have a very high liquor tolerance, I'll have you – hic." He fell over again.
"Sure you do Akifia, sure you do." Malik said, leaning over him.
"What are you talking about, my name's Bakura. I've worked with you for a whole year, and you don't know my name?"
"Funny, that's exactly what Akifia said when I tried to call him Bakura."
"Who's Akifia?" Bakura asked. The bartender broke in.
"Why, you're Akifia, world renowned thief." The bartender was going to say something else, but Malik cut him off.
"Wait, are you the person I was just playing D&D with?"
"Congratulations on your brilliant deduction, Sherlock."
"Which means the rest of you are here, which means Marik's plan worked, which means we are going to be here for a very long time."
"What are you talking about? What is Marik's plan?"
"You heard him better than I did. Didn't he say something about talking his revenge in the Shadow Realm?"
Boom, a large explosion sounded from the courtyard outside.
Malik and Bakura ran out to investigate.
Mai & Tea
Boom, a large explosion sounded from the courtyard nearby.
Mai and Tea took off in the opposite direction of the Apothecary to find out what the sound was.
Our favorite foursome
(get your mind out of the gutter, you perverts.)
Boom, a large explosion sounded from the courtyard outside. Seto grabbed Mokuba, mounted Ulharsaurivaussirdarastix and took off towards the direction of the sound. Joey shook his fist at the retreating dragon.
"Damn you rich people! Always have nice rides!" Yami was ignoring him.
"If we're our D&D characters, than - " he broke off and whistled loudly. A white horse galloped up and nuzzled Yami. "Aha!" Yami cried triumphantly before riding off after the dragon. Joey stared at him.
"Wait a minute, since when do sorcerers have mounts?" Then, "Hey wait a minute! Yugi!" He followed the horse, cursing.
Returning to the thieves
"Damn, what happened here?" Bakura said, surveying the various levels of destruction.
"Oh no, is that Yugi?" Malik took off towards the prone figure. Bakura rolled his eyes and followed slowly. Malik shook Yugi gently.
"Yugi? Yugi? Wake up! Yami's going to kill me if you don't!" Tea ran up panicking.
"What happened? Yugi? Yugi! Wake up!" She said, shoving Malik out of the way and shaking Yugi gently.
"I already tried that." Malik said. Tea ignored him, and continued shaking Yugi.
"There has to be something we can do!" She cried. Mai walked up behind her.
"Tea, isn't there anything in that bag of yours?"
"Oh right, I forgot." She sweat-dropped, before she stopped shaking Yugi and started fishing through her bag. A minute later she held up a first-aid kit triumphantly. "I found something!"
"Are you going to stop gloating and actually help the kid, or just stand there?" Bakura snapped, walking up. Tea ignored him.
"Don't worry Yugi! I'll save you!" Tea cuddled Yugi for a second, before opening up the first-aid kit. Just then, a large white horse came galloping towards the little group. It reared up, and Yami dismounted gracefully.
"Yugi!" He cried as his pushed everyone out of the way and took him up into his arms. "Don't die again!" He turned to the group. "Who here can heal?" Dead silence. "Don't just stand there! He may be dying! Who can heal?" Yugi's eyes fluttered open, and he reached up and pulled on one of Yami's blond streaks.
"I'm alright Yami, really, I'm fine now."
"Yugi! You're alright!" Yami set Yugi down carefully.
"Yami, you're here! I was so worried when I couldn't find the puzzle."
They looked towards the rest of the crowd, who were all pointing and staring dumbfounded, save Malik and Bakura who had wandered off towards an unconscious half-orc and were now kicking him.
"How can there be two Yugi's?" Before either of them could answer, a very large dragon descended and Kaiba jumped off gracefully. Mokuba jumped and landed on his face. For the first time in his life, however, Kaiba wasn't paying attention to his little brother.
"Damn your fast horse, Yugi." Kaiba snapped.
"I don't have a fast horse," Yugi said innocently.
"That was my horse Kaiba." Yami told him.
"How is this possible? How is there possibly two Yugi's?"
"That's what I was wondering, you've got some explaining to do!" Mai broke in. Joey hobbled up, and collapsed, huffing loudly.
"How – huff – are – huff – there – huff – two – huff –Yugi's? –gasp."
"There aren't two Yugi's. I," Yami pointed to himself, "am a completely separate person from Yugi. I was once the Pharaoh of Ancient Egypt, as I tried to tell you in the helicopter. Some misfortune befell me, and I was sealed in the Millennium Puzzle. Yugi put the puzzle together and I am now an extra personality inhabiting his body. Is that clear enough?" Tea punched her open palm with her other hand.
"I knew it!" she shouted.
"But how are you in two separate bodies here?" Mai asked.
"Well, we don't really know that yet." Yugi said.
"So you - " Joey said, pointing to Yami "while we were dueling him-" he pointed to Bakura, "What are you kicking, anyway?" Joey apparently recovered wandered over to Bakura and Malik to see what they were kicking. Joey looked on in shock and saw the number ten appear over the bodies head, and decrease to nine and then disappear. After another kick, the number nine appeared, decreased to eight, and disappeared.
"Get off of him, you're going to kill him!" Tea shrieked.
"So?" Bakura asked.
"What's wrong with you Bakura?"
"I, fortunately, am also separated from my light side. The Bakura you know is elsewhere in this world." Tea ran up, shoved the two aside, and rolled the body over. It was a very ugly, and very mangled half-orc. Fangs protruded from his lower lip, and he smelled like rotting garbage.
"Ew!" she yelled, before backing away. Tristan eyes opened, and he struggled to sit up.
"Tea? Is that you?" Tea screamed and hid behind Yami.
"Tristan are you alright?" Yugi asked.
"Tristan? First a monkey, now a half-orc? I think Tristan keeps drawing the short straw." Kaiba drawled.
"That's right, you do play a half-orc, don't you?" Joey asked, helping his friend to his feet.
"Yeah, and now I regret it." Tristan said.
"It appears this town has prejudice against half-orcs." Yugi said. "Being a gnome, I specialize in the art of disguise. Do you think I could change him so he looks normal? I could use my spell, 'Alter Appearance' if I could remember how it went." Yugi got down on his hands and knees. "Where's the puzzle, where's the puzzle."
"No! Yugi, no!" Tristan bellowed. Yugi stopped abruptly.
"Well it worked last time." Yugi said sheepishly.
"Yes, but we're not trying to kill anyone this time, we're trying to change my appearance." Yugi stroked his goatee thoughtfully.
"Bend over Tristan, maybe if I hold my hands over your face and say the name of the spell, it will work." Tristan did as he was told, and Yugi held his hands out over Tristan's face. Blue light enveloped Tristan's face, and magically his fangs began to retreat back into his mouth and disappear. He now appeared to be a very tall human.
"Your wounds still need treated, Tristan." Tea said. "Mai and I saw an Apothecary just up the street, we'll go there and get you some herbs. Then we can find our way out of this nuthouse."
"I don't have time to get medicine for a sick half-orc" Kaiba snapped irritably. Ulharsaurivaussirdarastix landed and turned to Kaiba.
"Actually, Master, I've checked our stores, and we're running low on essential herbs. It would be a good for us to stop there."
"Sweet ride." Mai said.
"Excuse me, but I am not just a 'sweet ride.' I am Ulharsaurivaussirdarastix, the almighty silver dragon of doom." Ulharsaurivaussirdarastix's eyes glowed blue in the sunlight.
"Am I the only one who notices that Ulhar- Ulharvaldrarigdargia – What's her name, is a white dragon with blue eyes?" Tristan said.
"I think Kaiba has a bit of an obsession." Joey agreed. Ulharsaurivaussirdarastix ignored them and turned to Kaiba.
"Should I turn into a less noticeable form?" she said. Kaiba nodded. In an instant, where the dragon once was there was now a beautiful woman who's silver hair blew in the wind and blue eyes that twinkled. Joey's mouth fell open. Mai hit him in the gut, and he closed it.
"Are we actually going to go to this Apothecary, or are we just going to stand here?" Mai asked.
"We're going, we're going!" Joey said. A little ways away, Malik turned to Bakura.
"I think we should go too, you never know when these things will come in handy."
"Yeah. I wonder if they sell anything good there."
"Not those kind of herbs you moron!" Malik hissed. And with that, our brave heroes trekked off towards the Apothecary. They arrive on its doorstep and Kaiba threw open the door. They all pushed their way in, and their noses were met with the foul smell of various herbs.
"They sell the good stuff alright." Bakura said happily. Before Malik could whap him, they heard a tiny, feminine voice from behind the desk.
"How may I help you?"
"Oh my God!" The male members of the party said in unison.
Author # 1: Well, our second cliffy, though I like this one better. This chapter's longer, so enjoy, because we worked hard on it!
Author # 2: Heh heh, cliffhanger. Just so you know, Ulharsaurivaussirdarastix isn't just some random 25-letter word that we pulled out of our heads. It actually mean 'Blue Eyes, White Dragon' in draconic.
Author # 1: We're nothing if not original.
Author # 2: Read and Review!
Chapter 2
Yami opened his eyes and found him-self face-to-face with a farmer armed with a pitchfork.
"Gah!"
"Oh brave adventurer at last you have awakened. Are you here to save our beautiful and humble town?"
"Adventurer? Town? Where am I?" Yami asked groggily, looking around. He was in the middle of a field of corn, too tall for him to see anything else.
"Hurry! The monsters are attacking the town!" And with that, the farmer dragged Yami off by the arm.
"Monsters? You mean like Duel Monsters? That's easy! I'll just get out my deck and-" Yami broke off to reach for his deck and do some fancy card work, only to find that instead of his deck there was a sword. "My deck! Where's my deck? And what is this?" He yelled, waving his sword around madly.
"Oh great." The farmer sighed, before turning to someone Yami couldn't see. "This one's a loony! Have you found anymore?"
"Sure have! Look at this one!" another farmer said as he came into the small clearing.
"Seto! Big brother! Put me down!" Mokuba squirmed in the other farmer's clutches.
Speaking of Seto....
Our handsome billionaire had woken up to find a girl sobbing on his chest.
"Please Master, come back to me! You can't leave me like this! Wake up!" The girl sobbed.
"Get off of me, you mangy peasant girl." Seto snapped, sitting up and pushing her off. The girl's eyes teared up even more.
"You're alive!" She hugged him, but pulled away before Seto could shove her off. "But peasant girl? After all we've been through? How could you say such a thing?" With that, she turned into a massive Silver Dragon. Unfortunately, she was still crying, and her tears were about the size of Seto's head. Seto gasped and drew back.
"You're a dragon?"
"You don't remember me? You hatched me and raised me from an egg! You named me when I was a tiny wrymling! After all we've been through!" she sobbed harder.
"I'm sorry, I must have missed something here."
"I know what must have happened! That last evil wizard we fought must have hit you with a spell that didn't take affect until a short time ago. And that's why you fell off, and why you don't remember me!"
"I didn't fall off of anything! What are you talking about?" The Dragon reached down and clutched Seto to her chest.
"Even if you don't remember me, you're still my Malhavoc!"
"Malhavoc? My name is Seto Kaiba; I'm CEO and owner of a multibillion- dollar corporation. Wait a minute, Malhavoc, I know that name!"
"Of course you do, it's yours! Do you remember my name?"
"Wait a minute, I'm – you're Ulharsaurivaussirdarastix!"
"You remember me!"
"No, I don't. That's the name of my dragon in D&D."
"What are you talking about? How could you forget me?"
"I couldn't forget you because you don't exist!"
"What a cruel thing to say Master, to your precious Ulharsaurivaussirdarastix!"
"You're not my precious Ulharsaurivaussirdarastix and I'm not your precious Malhavoc! I can't stay here any longer! I need to find Mokuba and get out of here!"
"Well, I can help."
Meanwhile, back in our favorite cornfield...
"Mokuba! Is that you?" Yami asked, trying to see how this short, stalking little man with a beard could ever look like Mokuba.
"Of course it's me! Have you gone blind Yugi?"
"No, I haven't. I was having trouble recognizing you behind that beard."
"I have a beard?" Mokuba looked down a shrieked. "I have a beard!"
"Of course you have a beard, you're a dwarf aren't you?" One of the farmers snapped irritably. "Now that you've had your happy little reunion, go save our town!"
"Maybe they're under the curse of an evil sorcerer! That's why they can't remember who they are, where they are, and if they're in the same party." The other one shrieked.
"But I wasn't in Yugi's party, I was with Seto, Ryou and Malik! But Malik got kind of weird." Mokuba said.
"Of course! He must have taken us to the Shadow Realm after that!"
"The Shadow what?" The first farmer said.
"Maybe they're not good adventurers after all, Jeb."
"I bet they actually are under some kind spell! We should get them some healing herbs from the Apothecary!"
"But what about our town?" A cheer was heard from the direction of the town.
"We're saved!" The townsfolk cried.
"I wonder what brave adventurer did that?"
"Let's go see!" So off the farmers went, dragging Yami and Mokuba, Yami by his arm and Mokuba by his beard.
"Er, ok." Yami said, while being dragged.
As they came into town, they saw a human barbarian standing atop a small pile of monsters, flexing his muscles.
"Joey?!" Yami exclaimed.
"Ah, hi Yug! I was just taking care of some business." Joey waved.
"Hail might adventurer!" The townsfolk cried. "What can you do for you, oh brave adventurer. Is there anything you want? Money? Food? Women? To be King? May we lick your shoes, mighty adventurer?"
"Kind of makes you sick, doesn't it?" Mokuba said under his breath.
The townsfolk lifted Joey on to a throne and proceeded to carry him about the town, while servant girls fanned him with palm leaves.
"Ahh, this is the life." Joey sighed. One of the monsters, an ugly, tree-like thing, climbed its way to the top of the pile of its dead comrades and proceeded to violently curse at Joey in Sylvan.
"Damn you and all your descendents!" The tree-thing swore in a high pitched voice.
"That thing is talking!" Yami said, horrified.
"No it's not." Mokuba looked at him. Meanwhile, the townsfolk were panicking.
"He's a demon! He speaks to them!" they cried.
"I vant to suck you blood, vah!" The creature shrieked as it jumped in the air, heading straight for Yami's throat. As it neared, Yami panicked and his reflexes took over. His drew his sword, and slashed the creature in half. He was sprayed with sap like blood as the creature fell to the ground.
"Our hero!" The townsfolk cried, as they dumped Joey off the throne and replaced him with Yami.
"Hail might adventurer!" The townsfolk cried. "What can you do for you, oh brave adventurer. Is there anything you want? Money? Food? Women? To be King? May we lick your shoes, mighty adventurer?"
"These townsfolk sure cry a lot, huh Joey?"
"My adoring fans! Come back to me!" Just then, a shadow fell across the town. The townsfolk held Yami over their heads.
"Save us from the impending doom, oh mighty adventurer!" Yami found him-self face-to-face with a large dragon. Its crested head gleamed silver in the sunlight. And blue eyes shone from beneath the horned brow. Yami shrieked and tried to scramble out of his throne, which was being held towards the dragon.
It landed majestically, and folded its wings to reveal a rider. Seto Kaiba slid off its back in a well-practiced manner.
"This isn't like you Yugi, cowering in the face of a simple dragon."
"I wasn't cowering! And how did you get a dragon? Why are you here?"
"I am here to collect Mokuba."
"Big brother! You're here, you're here!" Mokuba ran towards Kaiba, but tripped over his heavy armor and fell on his face. As he got to his feet, Kaiba walked forwards and grabbed Mokuba's beard.
"You have a beard." With that, he unsheathed his sword and proceeded to 'shave' Mokuba.
"My beard!" Mokuba squeaked. Kaiba threw the beard as far away as he could.
"You're coming with me." Kaiba told Mokuba, before dragging him off towards the dragon.
"But Master," Ulharsaurivaussirdarastix said, "I thought you hated dwarves!"
"Whatever I used to be, I'm not anymore! So give it up and get ready to go. We're leaving."
"What gives you the right to come in here, scare Yugi, grab Mokuba, shave him, and then ride off on your fancy dragon?" Joey yelled at the retreating billionaire.
"Wait a minute Kaiba, you can't just fly off like this! We're all here for a reason. I think this is some sort of game. We just need to find the end of it." Yami said.
"I don't need you!"
"That's what you always say, and how many times has Yugi saved your life?"
"No one asked your opinion, you Chihuahua."
"Oh yeah? You want to fight, huh, huh? I could kick your dragon riding a$$ any day!"
"Wait," Mokuba broke in, "Dragon-rider, dragon, rider. Pointy ear, elf. Beard, dwarf, axe. Mutt, nothing new. We're in D&D!"
"Very good Mokuba," Kaiba patted his little brother on the head. "It would seem that we are in some psychopath's campaign, and that we are all our D&D characters."
"Does that mean we're in a party together?"
"I hope not."
"So do I – Hey!"
"I wonder if everyone else is here too!" Yami interrupted the two.
What about our female compatriots?
Tea sat up and rubber her eyes. "Oh my head hurts." She moaned. Then she rolled over and found herself face-to-back with Mai Valentine. "Oh my God, Mai! Are you alive!" She poked her in the back. Mai moaned and sat up suddenly.
"What on earth am I wearing! There is absolutely no appeal in leather!" Tea sweat-dropped.
"Where are we?"
"I have no idea. But look, there's an Apothecary, we can go ask for directions."
"Oh, an Apothecary, sounds friendly enough." A pause. "What's an Apothecary?"
"Er, I guess we can ask that too."
What of Yugi and Tristan?
Yugi woke up, and found him-self sitting in the middle of a large crowd, which was jeering at a half-orc. The half-orc was wailing.
"Wait! What are you doing to me?! I don't want to die, don't lynch me!"
"That voice sounds oddly familiar." Yugi thought, "Wait a minute...Tristan!"
"Huh? Yugi! What are you doing here? Where are you?" Yugi stood up, but he still couldn't be seen because he was so short. A masked executioner stepped forward, and two large men came forward holding big drums. After a pause, they started to play a melancholy tune fit for the occasion.
"I'll save you Tristan!" Yugi cried, and tried to contact Yami.
/Yami? Do you have any good Dark Games for the occasion?/ A pause. /Yami? Yami? Are you there Yami? This is no time to be sleeping!/ Dead silence. Yugi glanced down anxiously.
"My puzzle! It's gone!" Yugi fell to his knees and began searching around the feet of the townsfolk. Somehow the rubbing of his hands against the floor and his murmuring of 'Where's the puzzle? Where's the puzzle?' caused a bright light to shine and a huge explosion. Yugi was thrown backwards, hit a wall, and then he knew no more. The number twenty floated over his head, and counted down to seventeen, before disappearing. A few yards over, a half-orc lay in a heap. The number fifty appeared over his head, before it counted down to forty-five and disappeared.
What of our evil bishonen?
"Akifia?" poke, poke, poke. "Akifia?"
"Go away," Bakura mumbled as he rolled over.
"Akifia, I really think you should wake up now." A familiar voice said.
"Perhaps he drank too much." A low, gruff voice suggested.
"I always heard albinos couldn't hold their liquor." A female voice said. Bakura shot straight up, scatter empty pints everywhere.
"What are you talking about? I have a very high liquor tolerance, I'll have you – hic." He fell over again.
"Sure you do Akifia, sure you do." Malik said, leaning over him.
"What are you talking about, my name's Bakura. I've worked with you for a whole year, and you don't know my name?"
"Funny, that's exactly what Akifia said when I tried to call him Bakura."
"Who's Akifia?" Bakura asked. The bartender broke in.
"Why, you're Akifia, world renowned thief." The bartender was going to say something else, but Malik cut him off.
"Wait, are you the person I was just playing D&D with?"
"Congratulations on your brilliant deduction, Sherlock."
"Which means the rest of you are here, which means Marik's plan worked, which means we are going to be here for a very long time."
"What are you talking about? What is Marik's plan?"
"You heard him better than I did. Didn't he say something about talking his revenge in the Shadow Realm?"
Boom, a large explosion sounded from the courtyard outside.
Malik and Bakura ran out to investigate.
Mai & Tea
Boom, a large explosion sounded from the courtyard nearby.
Mai and Tea took off in the opposite direction of the Apothecary to find out what the sound was.
Our favorite foursome
(get your mind out of the gutter, you perverts.)
Boom, a large explosion sounded from the courtyard outside. Seto grabbed Mokuba, mounted Ulharsaurivaussirdarastix and took off towards the direction of the sound. Joey shook his fist at the retreating dragon.
"Damn you rich people! Always have nice rides!" Yami was ignoring him.
"If we're our D&D characters, than - " he broke off and whistled loudly. A white horse galloped up and nuzzled Yami. "Aha!" Yami cried triumphantly before riding off after the dragon. Joey stared at him.
"Wait a minute, since when do sorcerers have mounts?" Then, "Hey wait a minute! Yugi!" He followed the horse, cursing.
Returning to the thieves
"Damn, what happened here?" Bakura said, surveying the various levels of destruction.
"Oh no, is that Yugi?" Malik took off towards the prone figure. Bakura rolled his eyes and followed slowly. Malik shook Yugi gently.
"Yugi? Yugi? Wake up! Yami's going to kill me if you don't!" Tea ran up panicking.
"What happened? Yugi? Yugi! Wake up!" She said, shoving Malik out of the way and shaking Yugi gently.
"I already tried that." Malik said. Tea ignored him, and continued shaking Yugi.
"There has to be something we can do!" She cried. Mai walked up behind her.
"Tea, isn't there anything in that bag of yours?"
"Oh right, I forgot." She sweat-dropped, before she stopped shaking Yugi and started fishing through her bag. A minute later she held up a first-aid kit triumphantly. "I found something!"
"Are you going to stop gloating and actually help the kid, or just stand there?" Bakura snapped, walking up. Tea ignored him.
"Don't worry Yugi! I'll save you!" Tea cuddled Yugi for a second, before opening up the first-aid kit. Just then, a large white horse came galloping towards the little group. It reared up, and Yami dismounted gracefully.
"Yugi!" He cried as his pushed everyone out of the way and took him up into his arms. "Don't die again!" He turned to the group. "Who here can heal?" Dead silence. "Don't just stand there! He may be dying! Who can heal?" Yugi's eyes fluttered open, and he reached up and pulled on one of Yami's blond streaks.
"I'm alright Yami, really, I'm fine now."
"Yugi! You're alright!" Yami set Yugi down carefully.
"Yami, you're here! I was so worried when I couldn't find the puzzle."
They looked towards the rest of the crowd, who were all pointing and staring dumbfounded, save Malik and Bakura who had wandered off towards an unconscious half-orc and were now kicking him.
"How can there be two Yugi's?" Before either of them could answer, a very large dragon descended and Kaiba jumped off gracefully. Mokuba jumped and landed on his face. For the first time in his life, however, Kaiba wasn't paying attention to his little brother.
"Damn your fast horse, Yugi." Kaiba snapped.
"I don't have a fast horse," Yugi said innocently.
"That was my horse Kaiba." Yami told him.
"How is this possible? How is there possibly two Yugi's?"
"That's what I was wondering, you've got some explaining to do!" Mai broke in. Joey hobbled up, and collapsed, huffing loudly.
"How – huff – are – huff – there – huff – two – huff –Yugi's? –gasp."
"There aren't two Yugi's. I," Yami pointed to himself, "am a completely separate person from Yugi. I was once the Pharaoh of Ancient Egypt, as I tried to tell you in the helicopter. Some misfortune befell me, and I was sealed in the Millennium Puzzle. Yugi put the puzzle together and I am now an extra personality inhabiting his body. Is that clear enough?" Tea punched her open palm with her other hand.
"I knew it!" she shouted.
"But how are you in two separate bodies here?" Mai asked.
"Well, we don't really know that yet." Yugi said.
"So you - " Joey said, pointing to Yami "while we were dueling him-" he pointed to Bakura, "What are you kicking, anyway?" Joey apparently recovered wandered over to Bakura and Malik to see what they were kicking. Joey looked on in shock and saw the number ten appear over the bodies head, and decrease to nine and then disappear. After another kick, the number nine appeared, decreased to eight, and disappeared.
"Get off of him, you're going to kill him!" Tea shrieked.
"So?" Bakura asked.
"What's wrong with you Bakura?"
"I, fortunately, am also separated from my light side. The Bakura you know is elsewhere in this world." Tea ran up, shoved the two aside, and rolled the body over. It was a very ugly, and very mangled half-orc. Fangs protruded from his lower lip, and he smelled like rotting garbage.
"Ew!" she yelled, before backing away. Tristan eyes opened, and he struggled to sit up.
"Tea? Is that you?" Tea screamed and hid behind Yami.
"Tristan are you alright?" Yugi asked.
"Tristan? First a monkey, now a half-orc? I think Tristan keeps drawing the short straw." Kaiba drawled.
"That's right, you do play a half-orc, don't you?" Joey asked, helping his friend to his feet.
"Yeah, and now I regret it." Tristan said.
"It appears this town has prejudice against half-orcs." Yugi said. "Being a gnome, I specialize in the art of disguise. Do you think I could change him so he looks normal? I could use my spell, 'Alter Appearance' if I could remember how it went." Yugi got down on his hands and knees. "Where's the puzzle, where's the puzzle."
"No! Yugi, no!" Tristan bellowed. Yugi stopped abruptly.
"Well it worked last time." Yugi said sheepishly.
"Yes, but we're not trying to kill anyone this time, we're trying to change my appearance." Yugi stroked his goatee thoughtfully.
"Bend over Tristan, maybe if I hold my hands over your face and say the name of the spell, it will work." Tristan did as he was told, and Yugi held his hands out over Tristan's face. Blue light enveloped Tristan's face, and magically his fangs began to retreat back into his mouth and disappear. He now appeared to be a very tall human.
"Your wounds still need treated, Tristan." Tea said. "Mai and I saw an Apothecary just up the street, we'll go there and get you some herbs. Then we can find our way out of this nuthouse."
"I don't have time to get medicine for a sick half-orc" Kaiba snapped irritably. Ulharsaurivaussirdarastix landed and turned to Kaiba.
"Actually, Master, I've checked our stores, and we're running low on essential herbs. It would be a good for us to stop there."
"Sweet ride." Mai said.
"Excuse me, but I am not just a 'sweet ride.' I am Ulharsaurivaussirdarastix, the almighty silver dragon of doom." Ulharsaurivaussirdarastix's eyes glowed blue in the sunlight.
"Am I the only one who notices that Ulhar- Ulharvaldrarigdargia – What's her name, is a white dragon with blue eyes?" Tristan said.
"I think Kaiba has a bit of an obsession." Joey agreed. Ulharsaurivaussirdarastix ignored them and turned to Kaiba.
"Should I turn into a less noticeable form?" she said. Kaiba nodded. In an instant, where the dragon once was there was now a beautiful woman who's silver hair blew in the wind and blue eyes that twinkled. Joey's mouth fell open. Mai hit him in the gut, and he closed it.
"Are we actually going to go to this Apothecary, or are we just going to stand here?" Mai asked.
"We're going, we're going!" Joey said. A little ways away, Malik turned to Bakura.
"I think we should go too, you never know when these things will come in handy."
"Yeah. I wonder if they sell anything good there."
"Not those kind of herbs you moron!" Malik hissed. And with that, our brave heroes trekked off towards the Apothecary. They arrive on its doorstep and Kaiba threw open the door. They all pushed their way in, and their noses were met with the foul smell of various herbs.
"They sell the good stuff alright." Bakura said happily. Before Malik could whap him, they heard a tiny, feminine voice from behind the desk.
"How may I help you?"
"Oh my God!" The male members of the party said in unison.
Author # 1: Well, our second cliffy, though I like this one better. This chapter's longer, so enjoy, because we worked hard on it!
Author # 2: Heh heh, cliffhanger. Just so you know, Ulharsaurivaussirdarastix isn't just some random 25-letter word that we pulled out of our heads. It actually mean 'Blue Eyes, White Dragon' in draconic.
Author # 1: We're nothing if not original.
Author # 2: Read and Review!