Disclaimer: do not own Lord of the Rings the Movie, or the books, and I don't own the West Wing… course not! It's all Aaron Sorkin, and … that person who made Lord of the Rings… into a movie. Peter jackson? AH… well. Most of this isn't mine, just the muffins, and putting it together.
Title: The Lord of the Muffins
Catagory: Cross-over, (I suppose) WestWing/Lord of the Rings
Rating: PG
Summary: What happens when Lord of the Rings is west wingized..?
Notes: This isn't a very serious fic, but I'd still appreciate not to be
flamed. Another note is, I am not
trying to put political parties into categories of good/evil, so though the
"G.O.P" is basically Moria and the evil people from Lord of the Rings, I'm not
saying they're evil. My point is I
dislike labeling anyone as good or evil, this is just a crazy fic :-D
hope you enjoy!
-Also any ideas welcomed!
LORD OF THE MUFFINS: THE FELLOWSHIP OF THE MUFFINS
CJ (voice only)
The world is changed. I feel it in the White house. I feel it at the Press Conferences. I smell it in the coffee. Much that once was, is lost, for none now will admit that they remember it.
It began with the making of the Muffins of power. They were given to the Senior Staffers, mortal, wisest and fairest of all beings. Seven were given to the Assistants, great researchers and human resources of the West Wing hallwayss. And Nine, nine muffins were gifted to the Media, who above all else desired a scoop, the story, the power. For within these muffins was bound the power and will to rule the others.
But they were all of them deceived, for deep in the land of the G.O.P, the Dark Lord Ritchie baked another muffin, a master muffin, and into this muffin he poured all his cruelty, his greed, and his will to dominate every branch of the government. One muffin to rule them all.
One by one, the free people of the United States fell to the power of the Muffin, but there were some who resisted.
A last alliance of Senior Staffers, Assistants, and Journalists rallied against the politicians of the G.O.P, and on the very slopes of the Hill, they fought for the freedom of their country. Victory was near, but the power of the muffin could not be undone.
Ritchie appears, and looks dangerous and attacks democrats with slurs and insults and bribes Journalists with the recipe for his muffins.
CJ (V.O.)
It was in this moment, when all hope had faded, that Josiah Bartlet, president, took up his secret weapons.
BARTLET telephones Leo, Ritchie and Bartlet debate, Ritchie appears to win the debate when he attacks Bartlet's Affirmative action policy, but Bartlet reverses the attack and when Ritche isn't looking he wins and then steals the Muffin.
CJ (V.O.)
And Ritchie, enemy of the free people of United States, was defeated. The Muffin passed to Bartlet, who had this one chance to destroy evil forever, but the hearts of men are easily distracted. And the Muffin of power had a plan of its own. The one Muffin was locked away in an unknown staffers desk during the presidents annual treasure hunt, and was quickly forgotten.
And some things that should not have been forgotten were lost. History became legend. Legend became myth. For two and half years, the Muffin passed out of all knowledge. Until, when chance came, the muffin ensnared another muffin-fan.
MARGARET finds the muffin in someones desk.
MARGARET: My precious, my own…