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The Letter
The letter I held in my hand made me feel sick. For the last 10 years I haven't seen, or even heard from my mother, and now she wants to see me. Since my mother left, I've stayed with my grandma and grandpa. I'm happy that way, and I don't want it to change. My grandma stood beside me smiling saying stuff like: "Oh, isn't this nice?" Well I had news for her, IS WASN'T NICE!!! I hated it. I hated the very idea of it. But despite the anger and sadness I felt, I smiled at her, less then willingly saying, "Yup! That does sound nice!"
How could I do this to myself? No, the better question was, why did she do this to me? I mean, come on, she could have if I wanted to see her.
I went through literally the whole day in a daze. I barely noticed when I ran right into my class secretary Takamura Suoh. "Kaichuo?!" He yelled rubbing his temples. "Would you please pay attention?" After looking at my face, he softened, "Something the matter Kaichou?"
I smiled at him, actually it was more like a smirk, but that didn't stop me from saying, "Nope, nothing at all, just a little tired." Unfortunately I don't think Souh bought that, but he shrugged and walked away just the same.
"helle Kaichou, Takamura-senpai!" You know, normally I liked hearing Akira's chipper, overly happy voice greet me every day, but today, good god I wanted to strangle him!
Suoh shrugged at him, as if to say, "And hello to you too."
I didn't bother to say anything, and just shrugged. i was actually surprised that Akira realized that something was wrong so quickly.
"Something wrong?"
Now I really wanted to smack him. No duh! I haven't seen my mother in 10 years. She wants to see me! While I like my life the way it is! No, of course nothings wrong! NOTHING!!! i smiled at Akira, not really wanting to, "Of course not, everything is fine...fine...just fine," My eyes lowered.
Wow, that was convincing I thought, sensing Suoh's presence in front of me, "Really Kaichou?" Suoh said a little louder then a whisper, "What's wrong? You've been acting funny all day."
I sighed heavily. Feeling my cheeks turn red, I pulled the letter from my chest pocket and handed it to him.
Suoh hesitated, then slowly took the letter from my hand. Suoh took the one page letter from the envelope and began to read, Akira reading over his shoulder. I turned my head away from them, jabbing my tongue lightly into the inside of my cheek. Suoh handed me back the letter. I took it, wanting to shred it. With out looking up, I knew that Suoh and Akira, (go figure) didn't understand.
I sighed, sadly turning to the big window, feeling like the cold rain that slowly tap tapped against the window pane. "W-when I was younger..." I began, not wanting to remember, "I was really shy...I never said anything to any one," I paused, "But that...that was okay, that was okay for me. As long as my mother was with me. S-she did everything with me. She held me when I felt sad, sang to me before bed...she'd even talk to me and tell me stories when she had other things to do. Then one day, we moved from a small house in Hardajuku to a small apartment in Tokyo. When we g-got to the apartment, my mother was in tears. She handed me to this lady I had never met, looked me in the eyes..." I paused again, feeling the tears forming in my eyes. I think Suoh and Akira realized this was hard for me, so they didn't say anything.
I continued, "S-she looked in my eyes, sang me a verse from my favorite song...and...the last word she ever said to me w-was..." I took a deep breath, "Goodbye," I pressed my hand against the window, "At the time, I didn't understand, actually I'm still not sure if I do...but after about a year or two I started thinking about it..." I wiped the tears from my eyes, not wanting to go on, but knowing I had to, "I had thought, 'am I a bad kid? Did I do something wrong that mommy didn't like?'" I turned to Suoh and Akira, eyes red and puffy, "So that's when I decided I had to change! I made myself talk and be polite no matter what! I studied hard, learned Chinese characters, I even perfected walking like an adult! So that if my mother ever were to see me again...I'd...I'd be the kind of son she could be proud of!!!"
The room was. Suoh was looking at me like he wanted to say something but just didn't know what. Akira looked up from his feet, cheeks tear stained, "KAICHOU!!!" He screamed, leaping over the desk and nocking me to the floor, "I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" Akira cried, face pressed against my chest.
"What's wrong?" I asked sitting up.
"T-t-that was the saddest story i-I've ever heard!" He cried, taking a deep breath.
I let out a small laugh, "It's OK Akira, I'm the one who should be crying..." Akira moved back a little bit, but he leaped right back on me once he saw my face again, "Hey, Akira calm down..." I whispered, "I'm gonna start crying if you don't stop..."
"Would you two please cut out the mail bonding?" Akira's girlfriend asked standing next to Suoh.
"U-Utako-San!" Akira cried, standing up rather shakily,
"W-what brings you here Utako-San?" I asked standing as, if not more shakily then Akira.
"Actually," Started Utako, "I came to inform Imonoyama Nokoru-sama that there is a phone call for him in the faculty office."
"Thank you very much Utaku-San," I laughed.
"I'll be right back!" Suoh grabbed my arm, "I'll go with you!" I looked over at Suoh, the minute I did, I knew I shouldn't have. i wanted to cry. He looked so worried and broken hearted. I hated that look! No, I more then hated it, I resented it! I hated it when people felt sorry for me, i really hated it!
"Kaichuo?" Suoh broke my train of thought. I must have been staring at him like a lost puppy or something because now he looked even more worried then he did before, "Are you okay?" Suoh asked.
"Y-yeah," I muttered, "Fine, just fine. You can come if you really want to," I stepped out of the door, Suoh right behind me.
The Letter
The letter I held in my hand made me feel sick. For the last 10 years I haven't seen, or even heard from my mother, and now she wants to see me. Since my mother left, I've stayed with my grandma and grandpa. I'm happy that way, and I don't want it to change. My grandma stood beside me smiling saying stuff like: "Oh, isn't this nice?" Well I had news for her, IS WASN'T NICE!!! I hated it. I hated the very idea of it. But despite the anger and sadness I felt, I smiled at her, less then willingly saying, "Yup! That does sound nice!"
How could I do this to myself? No, the better question was, why did she do this to me? I mean, come on, she could have if I wanted to see her.
I went through literally the whole day in a daze. I barely noticed when I ran right into my class secretary Takamura Suoh. "Kaichuo?!" He yelled rubbing his temples. "Would you please pay attention?" After looking at my face, he softened, "Something the matter Kaichou?"
I smiled at him, actually it was more like a smirk, but that didn't stop me from saying, "Nope, nothing at all, just a little tired." Unfortunately I don't think Souh bought that, but he shrugged and walked away just the same.
"helle Kaichou, Takamura-senpai!" You know, normally I liked hearing Akira's chipper, overly happy voice greet me every day, but today, good god I wanted to strangle him!
Suoh shrugged at him, as if to say, "And hello to you too."
I didn't bother to say anything, and just shrugged. i was actually surprised that Akira realized that something was wrong so quickly.
"Something wrong?"
Now I really wanted to smack him. No duh! I haven't seen my mother in 10 years. She wants to see me! While I like my life the way it is! No, of course nothings wrong! NOTHING!!! i smiled at Akira, not really wanting to, "Of course not, everything is fine...fine...just fine," My eyes lowered.
Wow, that was convincing I thought, sensing Suoh's presence in front of me, "Really Kaichou?" Suoh said a little louder then a whisper, "What's wrong? You've been acting funny all day."
I sighed heavily. Feeling my cheeks turn red, I pulled the letter from my chest pocket and handed it to him.
Suoh hesitated, then slowly took the letter from my hand. Suoh took the one page letter from the envelope and began to read, Akira reading over his shoulder. I turned my head away from them, jabbing my tongue lightly into the inside of my cheek. Suoh handed me back the letter. I took it, wanting to shred it. With out looking up, I knew that Suoh and Akira, (go figure) didn't understand.
I sighed, sadly turning to the big window, feeling like the cold rain that slowly tap tapped against the window pane. "W-when I was younger..." I began, not wanting to remember, "I was really shy...I never said anything to any one," I paused, "But that...that was okay, that was okay for me. As long as my mother was with me. S-she did everything with me. She held me when I felt sad, sang to me before bed...she'd even talk to me and tell me stories when she had other things to do. Then one day, we moved from a small house in Hardajuku to a small apartment in Tokyo. When we g-got to the apartment, my mother was in tears. She handed me to this lady I had never met, looked me in the eyes..." I paused again, feeling the tears forming in my eyes. I think Suoh and Akira realized this was hard for me, so they didn't say anything.
I continued, "S-she looked in my eyes, sang me a verse from my favorite song...and...the last word she ever said to me w-was..." I took a deep breath, "Goodbye," I pressed my hand against the window, "At the time, I didn't understand, actually I'm still not sure if I do...but after about a year or two I started thinking about it..." I wiped the tears from my eyes, not wanting to go on, but knowing I had to, "I had thought, 'am I a bad kid? Did I do something wrong that mommy didn't like?'" I turned to Suoh and Akira, eyes red and puffy, "So that's when I decided I had to change! I made myself talk and be polite no matter what! I studied hard, learned Chinese characters, I even perfected walking like an adult! So that if my mother ever were to see me again...I'd...I'd be the kind of son she could be proud of!!!"
The room was. Suoh was looking at me like he wanted to say something but just didn't know what. Akira looked up from his feet, cheeks tear stained, "KAICHOU!!!" He screamed, leaping over the desk and nocking me to the floor, "I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" Akira cried, face pressed against my chest.
"What's wrong?" I asked sitting up.
"T-t-that was the saddest story i-I've ever heard!" He cried, taking a deep breath.
I let out a small laugh, "It's OK Akira, I'm the one who should be crying..." Akira moved back a little bit, but he leaped right back on me once he saw my face again, "Hey, Akira calm down..." I whispered, "I'm gonna start crying if you don't stop..."
"Would you two please cut out the mail bonding?" Akira's girlfriend asked standing next to Suoh.
"U-Utako-San!" Akira cried, standing up rather shakily,
"W-what brings you here Utako-San?" I asked standing as, if not more shakily then Akira.
"Actually," Started Utako, "I came to inform Imonoyama Nokoru-sama that there is a phone call for him in the faculty office."
"Thank you very much Utaku-San," I laughed.
"I'll be right back!" Suoh grabbed my arm, "I'll go with you!" I looked over at Suoh, the minute I did, I knew I shouldn't have. i wanted to cry. He looked so worried and broken hearted. I hated that look! No, I more then hated it, I resented it! I hated it when people felt sorry for me, i really hated it!
"Kaichuo?" Suoh broke my train of thought. I must have been staring at him like a lost puppy or something because now he looked even more worried then he did before, "Are you okay?" Suoh asked.
"Y-yeah," I muttered, "Fine, just fine. You can come if you really want to," I stepped out of the door, Suoh right behind me.