TAUNT MY CHAINS
A/N: oh my gosh, it's been soooo long! I'm so sorry! Not that any of it matters but first I had finals and then the term was starting so I had a lot of work to do and then I had it all practically written and it got deleted!!!! Then my computer totally broke down and I had to rewrite the whooole thing!!!! SO I'm really sorry if it totally sucks! I really really tried.
And on another note... I need reviews people! I mean if no ones reading it why should I post it right? So how about.... at least 5 new reviews before I can post the next chapter?... not that it will be done by then lol....right? or maybe it will if only one person reviews like last chapter. (Thanks you Torny) and yeah on with the show!
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CHAPTER 3
"I always admired those who let their nightmares free. Most of mine I keep secret in the Diary, not always willing to share the doubts, fears, visions, in my eagerness to overcome and conquer them for the sake of passionate affirmation." - Anais Nin
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I awoke the next morning and rolled over to look at the clock. My eyes strained to see the blurry numbers. I leaned closer and closer. 7:21. I groaned and rolled onto my back, my drowsy eyes adjusting to the morning light. The realization started that I wasn't in my own bed and I blinked looking around the room The events of yesterday settled over me like a blanket . And I smiled. I laid in bed for a little longer, taking comfort in the silent stillness.
Finally, I rolled myself out of bed and dressed casually in jeans and a T-shirt. My wand I had laid on the night stand the night before, now tucked safely in my pocket. I quietly creeped into the hall. Sirius' door was shut, though I didn't bother to try the knob, it gave off a presence of being locked. As if it didn't want anyone to come in. Remus' door was open, his bed made. I could hear pans clattering below me and I padded down the stairs, my bare feet slapping the wood softly. I walked down the hall and stepped into the kitchen. Remus had his back to me and was searching the cabinets.
"Good Morning" I announced brightly. He smiled over his shoulder.
"Good Morning, I was just going to wake you up" he pulled a pan from the cupboard and turned around.
"Sleep Well?" he asked conversationally as he turned on the stove.
"Yes, I did, Thanks... I wanted to thank you for letting me stay here." I said, leaning back on the counter. He turned to me
"Don't even mention it Sarah" he said with sincerity. And I smiled.
"I'll try" was what I said after a decidedly short pause. A cup fell to the floor as Remus moved a bowl out of his way.
"Do you need any help?" I asked with a light hearted laugh. He turned and smiled back.
"I think I've got breakfast handled, but you could do a little something for me." He evaded.
"Are you going to tell me or do I get to guess?" I asked with a little laughter in my voice.
"I guess I'll tell you" he said mock-reluctantly. "I would really appreciate it if you woke up Sirius for me"
"He'll eat me" I protested. Sirius would no doubt be very grumpy about being woken up. Even though I had never seen him in the morning, I could only imagine.
"He won't " Remus replied with a small laugh. I shook my head.
"Fine" I conceded with a sigh as I made to leave.
"He's hard to wake up" Remus warned me as I was almost to the hall.
"Brilliant" I muttered.
"Hit him really hard and back away quickly. That always works for me" He suggested good naturedly. I rolled my eyes. "You could always throw cold water on him, I know that would work" He added off-handedly. My eyes lit up.
"Could I really?"
He turned around with a devious smile. "You want to?" He asked as if this was a 50 point question on an O.W.L. I raised my eyebrows and Remus' smile turned down-right evil. I had never seen him like this and I laughed.
"Let's do it!" My enthusiasm bounced off the walls and threw itself around Remus. Before I said another word he pulled a pitcher from the cupboard, filled it with icy water, and handed it off to me. I smiled down on it before looking up at Remus. I had been half-kidding... or at least I thought I had been at the time. The tiniest speck of doubt surfaced from my thought of him being upset with me, but it was drowned out in no time.
"Go for his head... then run like heck." Remus was full of helpful suggestions.
"He's faster than me!" I protested weakly.
"Small technicality." And Remus turned back to his sizzling pan. I stood for a second longer before I laughed to myself and bound up the stairs. I stalked slowly through the hall to Sirius' door. I rested my hand on it silently before I gently pushed it open. It creaked. I flinched and pushed the rest of the door open quickly.
The room was dark with the blinds drawn. I walked ever closer to the bed and peered into the mountain of covers. Sirius was lying on his stomach his limbs at odd angles and his face pressed peacefully into the pillow. I stood for a second. The serene cloud the room was enveloped in at the moment made me hesitate to break it. But I shrugged to myself inwardly with an evil smile and held the pitcher over his head. I waited no longer and turned it downside.
"ARRRRGGGG!!!"
I burst out laughing as I fled the room. Dropping the pitcher at the foot of the bed I went sliding into the hall. I went bounding down the stairs as I heard Sirius stumbling out of the door behind me.
Remus laughed as He heard footsteps pounding down the stairs followed by heavier footsteps.
I leapt down the last few stairs and grabbed the railing as I fumbled into the hall. Sirius' fingers slipped around my arm, but I evaded him easily.
"I'll get you!" He called after me.
I laughed tauntingly as I ran straight past the kitchen into the family room and around to the other side of the couch, catching my breath. As Sirius stopped on the side of the couch opposite me, trying to calculate my next move, I saw him for the first time. He was breathing raggedly, wearing pajama bottoms and a white tee-shirt now half translucent with wet, His hair a mess, face dripping. I couldn't help but laugh.
"Good Morning" I said sarcastically. He narrowed his eyes and lunged towards one side of the couch. I countered him and ended on the side across from him. He inched sideways around the couch and I kept walking around until I was on the side I had started on. He stopped and I jumped onto the couch and over the back. I almost made it to the hall when Sirius wrestled me to the ground and started tickling me. I gasped with laughter.
I tried, playfully, to get away from him. My breath gone with laughter, so was Sirius' as he laughed at my flailing. His right hand slid a little higher up my side and a searing pain shot through my body. Memory flooded my mind involuntarily.
"Don't speak like that to me!" Uncle Vernon grabbed my upper arm and leaned closer. He had been drinking, I could smell it on his breath. I struggled against his hold.
"Just like your good for nothing parents" His words slurred together and my eyes clouded with blind rage. I struggled harder sinking my fingernails into his restraining arm.
He made an incoherent noise and took a swing at my face. Thank God he was drunk because he missed and hit my shoulder.
I fell back against the wall and slid to the floor with a gasp of pain. His foot came out of nowhere and made contact with my side. Searing pain shot through my body. I let out a strangled moan as he leaned against the wall. I pushed my chin up defiantly as he readied to take another try.
An undeniable clatter resounded through the house coming from the kitchen. Uncle Vernon turned his back on me and staggered down the hall.
I pushed myself away more forcefully. The pain had stolen my remaining breath and was now taunting my lack of air. Sirius realized I could no longer breath but mistook it for laughing. He leaned back on his heels with a smile. I pushed a bright smile on my face as a dull ach overtook my senses.
He stood up and held out his hand for me. I reached out and he pulled me up in one smooth movement. I ignored the feeling of a knife between my ribs as Sirius pulled me into a one armed hug.
"I understand, you were just getting a glass of really cold water and you accidentally dumped it over my head" He said with laughter. I smiled back, placing faith in my voice I made reply.
"Actually I was getting a pitcher of really cold water and I accidentally dumped it over your head. But I knew you wouldn't mind" Relief flooded me when my voice held steady. He shook his head and shivered in the crisp morning air flooding into the room from the window. He took to the middle of the kitchen.
"Remus, a little help?" He requested after searching his empty pockets for a wand. Remus turned around, divulged in a quiet laughter at seeing a freezing Sirius and tossed him his own wand before turning back.
Sirius pointed the wand at himself and waved it down his body. In a flash he was completely dry and he leaned over Remus' shoulder to look at what he was cooking, he teased Remus a little and they both laughed.
I took the opportunity to take deep breaths, my side was now numb and I tried to look casual as I leaned against the counter.
Sirius handed me a cup of tea. I took a sip of the warm liquid and immediately made a face.
"Is it that bad?" Sirius laughed. I shook my head.
"There's sugar in it" I said distastefully.
"Yeah..."
I smiled. "Sorry I don't like sweet things in my tea." I brought it back up to my lips to try and drink the rest of it.
"Well then don't drink it." Sirius said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. I was taught to eat and drink whatever was given to you because you might not get anything else.
He took it from my hands and poured it into the sink. He then poured an amber liquid from the kettle into my now empty cup.
"Milk?" he asked. I nodded. He stirred it and handed it to me as he walked by.
"Thanks " I called to him gratefully.
I smiled and took a sip of the soothing liquid.
~*~
After breakfast Remus had ordered us to get ready and meet in the family room, where we were all waiting at the moment.
"How are we getting there?" I asked as I looked at the fireplace.
"Grimauld doesn't have any working fireplaces, so I suppose we'll just apparate." Remus said as if this one comment held all the answers.
"Umm, I don't apparate" I specified as if Remus didn't know already. He smiled at me.
"Don't worry Sirius will take you" I had no idea what this meant exactly and I looked to Sirius. He was staring off into space.
"Siri" I called. His head snapped around.
"Are you OK?" I asked with my eyebrows raised.
"Yeah" He said in an unconvincing voice. I just nodded, He really didn't want to go here did he?
"Sirius, we'll have to apparate." Remus relayed with a look of sympathy.
"I know, I got you" He said reassuringly.
"Here" Sirius muttered. He wrapped his arms around my stomach. "Hold on tight" He commanded softly. I grabbed his upper arm and in a blink we landed on solid ground.
I hadn't realized I had closed my eyes but the first thing I felt was the hard breeze slapping my cheeks. I opened my eyes. We were standing in the front of a very old mansion. In fact it reminded me of a haunted house. Remus had opened the iron gate and was following the walk to the door. I tried to follow him but Sirius arms held me still. I looked up at his face. He was watching it with dread.
"Sirius" I whispered. He looked down at me. "Sorry" he whispered and loosened his arms. They fell away to his sides.
"Let's go" I said brightly and took hold of Sirius' arm leading him up to the door where Remus stood waiting.
I noticed the unique knocker on the door. It was a serpent. I turned to Sirius to ask him about it but the look on his face stopped me. Remus tapped his wand on the knob and turned it. The door opened with a resounding creak and Remus lead us through the door. I walked in, followed by a reluctant Sirius.
The door shut behind us with a clunk that echoed through the foyer. We all took slow steps farther into the house. I looked around trying to take it all in. It was all layered in dust, the furniture had sheets over it, cobwebs clung to the nooks and crannies.
I took a step and a rotting floor board collapsed, my foot sunk into the floor. Sirius instinctively leaned to grab me but I fell forward and reached for a candlestick holder on the wall. It was yanked off the wall with a horrid squealing sound that ran through the house. I had gotten my balance already but Sirius took me under the arms and pulled me further away from the hole. At the exact same moment a curtain across the room was flung open by some invisible force. A painting of a horridly pale women was revealed and after a short hesitation it started screaming. I flinched and my hand flew to my mouth when I saw her, heard her.
She was staring directly at Sirius who was still with his arm across me as if to protect me from something I had o knowledge of.
"FILTHY SCUM!!! BLOOD TRAITOR!!! SHAME OF MY FLESH!!"
"Damnit" Sirius whispered with vengeance in my ear. He moved his hand away slowly afraid I would immediately collapse, but I stood stock still.
Remus had already run over and was trying to close both curtains, which provided quite a task it seemed. Sirius ran to the curtain and they both suffered with it until it was finally yanked closed.
The whole house rang with unbearable silence.
"I'm Sorry" I finally whispered through my hand. Sirius stared at me for a short second.
"It's allright, don't worry about it" He almost mumbled.
"Are you OK?" He asked in a much stronger voice. I let my hand fall down slowly and stood up straight.
"Yeah, Yeah, I'm fine... Are you?" I raised my eyebrows as my gaze involuntarily flickered to the curtains.
He nodded "I'm fine" He replied shortly. "I'm fine" He repeated. with one last bitter look at the curtain.
"Well, you've finally met my dear ol' mum" He commented grimly.
"Oh" I said with a breath of understanding. I nodded slowly. "She's....lovely" I said with a fake awkwardness. Then I looked down at the candlestick still clenched in my hand. I dropped it to the floor.
"You didn't like that did you?" I asked with a smile. "I mean a candlestick on the wall... that's a fire waiting to happen!"
I looked around the house and nodded appreciatively.
"Now, this house has a lot of potential" I smiled and looked back at them. "So let's get going" I clapped my hands together.
Remus smiled at my attempt to change the subject and took it upon himself to help me out.
"I think we need to get rid of the dust first..." He pulled out his wand and took a step forward. With a flourish of his wand a kind of cyclone seemed to sweep down the stairs, gathering the thick layer of dust along with it. It swarmed past me and I took a step back. The front window was flung open and the small tornado faded into the wind.
"wicked"
Remus smiled at me before turning to Sirius. "You know we're going to have to do most of this the muggle way"
Sirius groaned. "That will take years!"
"Magic doesn't work nearly as well as muggle cleaning... you know that" Remus said this with a brightness only I could rival. And I did.
"Great! Let's go"
Sirius groaned again and I laughed before springing to the lavish stairs. "Wait" Sirius called, I thought he was going to complain again but instead he suggested he and Remus check all the floor boards to make sure nothing worse happened.
"Why don't you go collect all the bed sheets and get them started." Remus suggested as Sirius muttered spells that hit the floor silently.
"No Problem" This was going to be fun. I started bounding up the stairs my hand sliding along the intricately carved banister.
"Washer's in the basement" Sirius called after me. and "Got it" was all I managed before I came to a landing with a door.
I wrenched it open and peered inside. I noticed that the dust spell must have gone through the whole house because this room was dust-free. It smelled like a moth ball though. I coughed quietly and approached the lavish bed. The cover was intricate and decorative, like a beautiful, late century masterpiece. The furniture of the room was all old antique mahogany that could use a coat of varnish. The wood floor was covered in a plush rug that looked hand woven. If the outside hadn't said it already, the rooms did. This house was rich. I stripped the bed and carried the bedding to the landing where I set it down with a sigh of self-accomplishment. I did the same with the rest of the rooms, which was quite a few might I tell you. I accumulated quite a large pile and shook my head as I grabbed half of it in my arms and then started kicking the rest of them down the stairs.
"Need a little help?" A voice called. I dropped the rest of the bedding and Remus was revealed standing at the bottom of them.
"I do" Sirius called from behind me. I turned around. He had a very very large box teetering on the banister and across his left cheek all the way to his nose and almost touching his eye was a huge streak of dirt.
Sirius sneezed which aggravated the dust on the box.
"Your brilliant spell didn't make it to the attic, Moony"
Me and Remus exchanged a short look before we both burst out laughing. Sirius stood in confusion for a few seconds before I could suppress my laughs enough to let some words out.
"You have something on your face" I wheezed the words out. Sirius ran his hand over his face and smudged the dirt up to his forehead then looked at his blackened hand. He split into a small smile.
Sirius abandoned the box and it didn't move an inch as he leapt down the stairs and tackled me. I fell backwards into the mountain of linens, still laughing. He waved his wand over his face and the dirt disappeared.
It took a while to stop my laughing
~*~
I was lying in the middle of the living room. It was crazy late. We spent two hours exhausting every known spell to get that stupid painting of Mrs. Black off the wall. The bed covers had taken about 20 loads in the washer and had just been finished about an hour ago, in which I used to make every single one of the beds. We got the plumbing to work again... actually Remus did. We had gone through every room and thrown all the dark items away.... let me tell you there wasn't very many 'decorative' items left in the house. Tomorrow, we decided to re-varnish all the furniture and polish all the floors, with the rest of the order it should be a lot easier... at least as Remus said.
I had learned something pretty cool today. In wizarding zones underage wizards could use wands with out the ministry knowing. Sirius had taught me a few cleaning spells but Remus had given me the whole "Use responsibility" speech. In which Sirius scoffed, but I promised Remus I would. And I did. But I couldn't deny that it was a lot of fun and I sometimes wanted to just go crazy with spells.
Footsteps echoed in the big room. I turned my head to the stairs. Sirius was dusting himself off and looked at me with a smile.
"Tired?" He asked. I just nodded.
"I think it's time to call it a night" Sirius yelled up the stairs to Remus.
"I think it's time to call it a really late night.... I called it a night like two hours ago." I closed my eyes and slipped in and out of consciousness. I snapped them open and told myself to buck up.
"Are you OK?" he asked as he approached me.
"I'm so tired" Was all I could say. He grabbed my arms and pulled me up.
"aren't you hungry?" Sirius stomach growled. I smiled. I should be, we had went through the whole day without stopping to eat a single thing. I'm sure my stomach would have growled as well if it wasn't so tired.
"I don't think I have the energy to be hungry" I smiled and stood straighter.
"Are you sure? I'm starving"
"I'm sure" I leaned into him.
"I'm taking Sarah home, I'll see you there" Sirius called over his shoulder as he guided me to the door.
I thought I heard Remus call back "OK" but I couldn't be too sure. We walked out into the cold night and I shivered. We stepped onto the street and Sirius wrapped his arms around me.
"Try and concentrate a little." He whispered into the night. I did and in a second I was surrounded by warmth. The fire roared in the fireplace. I walked up the stairs successfully with Sirius following me as I walked into my room. I pulled the covers back and fell into bed.
"Goodnight, Sarah" He pulled the covers up to my chin.
I opened my eyes. "Goodnight" I smiled and that's all the last thing I remembered.
~*~
A scream echoed in my head.
I shot up in bed. The sheets were soaked with cold sweat. I was trying to decide if I had screamed in real life as well as my dream. The house was silent. I took deep breaths and turned on the light. The room was eerie and I shivered. When I jumped out of bed, my whole body shivered as the breeze filtered through the blinds.
I pulled a sweatshirt out of a pile of clothes on the chair on my way out of the room. I opened my door and walked on tiptoes down the hall. Silently fumbling down the stairs, I managed to pull my sweatshirt over my head. My wrinkled jeans brushed the floor with an annoying swishing sound that echoed in my head. The light was on in the kitchen and I slowed down to a creep.
Sirius and Remus were sitting up at the table, seemingly having a talk. My fear melted in my chest as Sirius looked over at me standing in the doorway.
"Muster up enough energy for some food? We have-"
"No" I cut him off. I didn't have the mind to think of how rude I was being. He looked at me like he was seeing me for the first time.
"You look a little pale, are you all right?" He stood up.
"Yeah, yeah, I'm OK" I stumbled over the words. I looked anywhere else in the kitchen but him and played with the cuffs on my sweatshirt.
I saw Remus and Sirius exchange looks from the corner of my eye. Sirius poured me a cup of tea.
"Here, no sugar, just the way you like it"
I smiled my thanks and took a sip. He put a hand on my shoulder and guided me to a chair at the table.
"Can you tell me what's wrong?" He asked resting his chin on his hand.
I nodded after a slight hesitation.
"It's not a big deal.... I just had a weird dream." I looked into the rippling liquid as I stirred it with my spoon and I thought, my life is kind of like that. Other people, just like the spoon, would put ripples in my life. Try to control my life, like the spoon controlled the tea. I let the spoon drop, it clinked against the cup and the liquid stilled.
"A weird dream..."
"Well, it was kinda more like a nightmare..." I corrected reluctantly.
"Did your scar-" Sirius ' voice was almost apprehensive.
"No, it's not my scar, it's just me" I stroked the handle of my teacup with my thumb.
"Oh...Do you want to talk about it." Sirius' voice was deeper now with a gentle tone.
"It's pretty much just a replay of the fourth task." I was very wary of talking about the triwizard tournament at all.
Sirius and Remus exchanged looks again and I clenched my teeth. It made me a little self conscious when they did that, like they were talking about me without even talking.
"Is this the first time you've had this dream?" This time Remus spoke.
"No, I have it all the time, 3-4 times a week minimum." I still couldn't look at either of them and I stared at the grain of the wood.
"So it's just a replay? exactly the same?" Remus was quite inquisitive.
"Mostly, sometimes it's a little different."
"What's different about it?" Remus was quite prying wasn't he?
"Cedric and My parents' echoes talk to me"
"What do they say?"
I felt like screaming now.
"Mean things that I know they would never have said" I said this almost impatiently, " It is just a dream" I was insistent, I had said this mostly to convince myself.
There was a long silence where I still refused to look up, instead content with staring at my cooled tea.
"OK, well, I've got to get to sleep, Night Sirius" He put a hand on my shoulder as he walked by. "Sweet dreams"
I smiled up at him before he left the room.
I looked up to see Sirius lost in thought and I bit my lip. I hope I didn't say anything wrong.
The silence, though non-existent to Sirius, was unbearable for me.
"I'm sorry I brought up my parents, I didn't mean to upset you." My small voice penetrated his mind and he spoke with an element in his voice I had never heard before.
"Oh, no, Sarah I don't want you to think that...You're parents were amazing people, and if anyone tells you can't talk about them you tell me because I'll hex them into an oblivion for you." Though he stumbled over his words the sentiment made my heart hurt in my chest. He put his arm around my shoulders and pulled me closer to him. " I was just thinking about how much you have to deal with" His voice dipped even lower.
You don't even know the half of it
"It's not that bad." I said this with a little laugh, probably at the absurdity of my answer.
"Do you want to talk about your parents?"
I didn't think this was the best time to start balling. I bit my lips together and shook my head.
"Yeah...but not right now"
"Ok, I'm here for when your ready" His soothing voice made me smile in spite of myself.
But all I could do was nod. and whisper "OK"
"You Ok to go back to sleep?" I thought about the question before answering. I decided to answer with honesty.
"I seriously don't think I'll sleep very much... I never do after the dreams." I like to call them 'dreams'... they sounded so much better.
"You can go to sleep though, I have this book I'm reading-"
"Reading? yeah, right! I think it's time to roast marshmallows!" He jumped up and started rummaging in the cupboards before I could even get a word in
and the little bit of pain and fear that had previously had me clenched in it's defying grip, let go,
and I smiled.
TBC
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A/N: so? how was it??? I hate to beg but please please please review!! I would LOVE to know what you all thought of this chapter!
THANK YOU ALL FOR READING AND DON'T FORGET TO REVIEW!!!
Torny: Well with Snape getting over the whomping willow thing, I'm not really one to hold grudges really so I dunno... but I do like your idea about the Ocllumency (however you spell it) And I think I know how I will introduce it into the story... this chapter was a little pointless... to me it seems all the chapters are kind of pointless until it gets to the real plot of the story... lol I keep wanting to jump ahead and write the exciting parts. You're my faithful reviewer! So keep it up lol, I can't wait to write Snape... it's going to be fun, I hope, when I get there perhaps you can tell me if Snape is Snape-like at all.