Disclaimer: I don't own The Legend of Zelda, Kingdom Hearts, Final Fantasy
7, Starcraft, Sonic the Hedgehog, South Park, or The Characters Prince
Marth and Roy. Also I do not own Yu-Gi-Oh.
Party in the house.
Chapter 6 Under Seige
The cast is currently in the house of the Author. Specifically his room with the computer.
Here is the current situation:
Link- Tied to a chair
Zelda- Locked in the closet
Ganon- Chased around by Impa
Ruto- Tied to a chair NEXT to Link
Nabooru- Sleeping on the bed.
Rauru- Eating food
SK- Getting hyped up by sugar
Sonic- tied to a chair
Amy- hugging Sonic
Sephiroth Choir- Singing Sephiroth repeadidly
Kirby- Doing the Kirby Dance
Malon- Singing Epona's song
Saria- Trying inch closer to Link, also tied to a chair
Kenny- being tortured by a hydralisk
Jim- being "Tortured" by Infested Kerrigan
Artanis, Zeratul and Tassadar- Drunk off their heads
Sora- Making out with Kairi
Kairi- Making out with Sora
Riku- Pouting
Ylink- sleeping
Aeris- Making out with Sephiroth
Cloud- Making out with Tifa
Shadow- The only sane character apart from Author.
Author- Typing this document.
In the castle
The party was going well until...
Hydralisks appeard from the ground.
Jim: *Gasps* Hydralisks. ATTACK.
Hydralisks: Send in the reinforcements.
Overlord: Copy that.
More Hydralisk looking monsters came out.
Hunter Killers: We are the Hunter Killer. More powerful than puny Hydralisks. We are here on per order the Overmind.
Jim: No duh.
Hunter Killers: AKA Sephiroth.
Aeris: *Gasps*
Sephiroth: Cerebrate, bring in the rest of the troops.
Infested Duran: You got it.
Even more Hunter Killers came about.
Sephiroth: In the dungeons NOW.
In the dungeons of the castle
Sephiroth: As per order of the BOOK OF BAD GUYS, I must take one girl as a hostage. And torture her to make it EVIL. And no I AM NOT GAY. So MEN you may be excused.
Men huddle away, females scared to death.
Sephiroth: Hahahahahahahaahha. *To Kairi* What are you so afraid of little girl?
Kairi: N-n-n-n-n-nothing. NOTHING AT ALL.
Sephiroth: I see. Aeris. *Tries to take Aeris' hand*
Slap
Aeris: That was for killing me.
Sephiroth: Yeah. I remember the good old times.
Cloud: Stop laying on Aeris.
Sephiroth: SHUT UP YOU BLONDE.
Cloud: I'm NOT BLONDE. *Cries* WAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. I only have yellow spikey hair!
Sephiroth: Shut him up please. The first girl to shut him up is exempt.
Kairi slaps Cloud senselessly.
Kairi: SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP.
Cloud: *Sniff* Okay.
Zelda: I demand you release me.
Sephiroth: And I demand Princess Zelda gest taken to the dungeon room 13.
Zelda: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.
Sephiroth: Alright you will be grouped into separate rooms. Now in case you try and pull somehting off, there will be even more Hunter Killers waiting for my command to kill you. So don't try it. Now the rooms will be:
#1 Link & Ruto & Zelda & Saria & Wendy & Romani & Malon & Cloud & Aeris & Tifa & Sora
#2 Kenny & Hydralisks
#3 Cartman & Stan & Kyle
#4 Anju and Kafei
#5 Nabooru & Rauru & Sheik & Gannon & Impa.
#6 Riku & Kairi.
This will get interesting. Let's look at the most interesting of all. Dungeon Room #1
In #1:
Cloud: Let's play a game.
Wendy: Spin the Bottle?
Everyone: Ok.
Link and Cloud go to one side, while all the girls go to the other.
Link: So Cloud. If you had to pick, who would you pick?
Cloud: Huh? Oh. I don't know. Tifa is you know, but Aeris is HOT. So I can't decide.
Link: I see ya. I need help. See there are these five particular girls. Zelda, Ruto, Saria, Malon and Romani. They all want me. Zelda is a princess. Ruto I will NOT choose. Saria is my first friend when I had no friends. Malon gave me my horse and she is a HOT redhead. Romani a ditto of Malon.
Cloud: Jee, I don't know.
Ruto: Hey guys have you spinned yet? I was picked.
Cloud & Link: ........ YOU!
Spins bottle. Everyone comes over and sees.
Link: Come on on Cloud. Din, let it go on Cloud.
Cloud: By the Planet of this earth, let it go on Link.
It stops on Cloud
Cloud: ....................... I hate you bottle.
Cloud gives an amazingly quick peck on Ruto.
Cloud: Grrrrr.
Spins bottle again. This time again on Cloud.
Cloud: WHY ME AGAIN?
Link: It's just you and me. 50/50
Cloud: Oh yea.
Bottle lands on Zelda.
Cloud gives a small kiss on the cheek to Zelda. Zelda blushes
Zelda: (Wow he is so frickin hot, like Link.)
Spin bottle again.
Lands on Link and Malon.
Malon runs over to kiss Link. Not a fast little peck though.
Link: *Kissed* Ughhhh.
Spins bottle again. Lands on Cloud and......
Tifa: It was me.
Aeris: It was SOOOO me.
Zelda: Come on you know it's me.
Tifa: Shut up Zelda. It was me. Admit it.
Aeris: Stop lying Tifa. You just want a kiss from Cloud.
Zelda: Yeah stop lying.
Cloud: Oh boy. (I guess I gonna have to choose.)
Zelda: Shut up Aeris.
Aeris: You know it's me.
Tifa: I have better eyesight than you, your royal laziness.
Zelda: Silence!
Aeris: No it was SOOOO me.
Cloud: F-f-Fine I-I-I pick......................... .......Aeris
Everyone: ..................
Aeris: Cloud!
Cloud gives a peck in the cheek to Aeris, but Aeris returns with a peck to the mouth.
Saria: I'm bored. Hey Cloud. Aeren't you a swordsman?
Cloud: You dare call me a lowly Swordsman? How dare you! *Draws his buster sword*
Saria: AHHHHHHH.
Link blocks Cloud
Link: Cloud, Stop. I mean it.
Cloud: You should be lucky I'm guy that is nice to girls.
Saria: Well then why don't you two duel?
Cloud & Link: Sure.
They whip out their Yu-Gi-Oh dueling decks.
Cloud: You're going down. I own the mighty Blue-eyes.
Girls after Link: *Gasps* But Link doesn't have anything that strong in his Deck.
Link: But I own the Blue-eyes as well.
Link: Ha. Well let's just duel.
Link and Cloud draw five cards.
Cloud: I start the match with Celtic Guardian in the defense.
Link: Pathetic. I summon the Feral Imp and Attack.
Cloud: You are so stupid. Tribute to the DOOMED.
Discards Dark Magician to destroy Feral Imp.
Link: Fool. A Dark Magician is precious.
Cloud: Well did anyone teach you this combo? Monster Reborn. Reborn the Dark Magician. Attack!
Score: Link 5500- Cloud 8000
Link: Well that's okay, because now I summon the magic card polymreization to fuse Gaia the Fierce Knight and Curse of Dragon into Gaia the Dragon Champion. Attack!
5500-7900
Cloud: * Evil Grin* ( I have a blue eyse and swords of revealing light. This will surely decimate him, and even with whatever pathetic magic cards and trap cards he may have, cuz of my Lord of D. will help.) I play Swords of Revealing Light. And summon this card facedown defense mode.
Link: Fine. I summon Giant Soldier of Stone Defense Mode. I end my turn.
Cloud: I now flip summon Lord of D. and play the flute of Summoning Dragon to Summon the BLUE EYES WHITE DRAGON. BLUE EYES WHITE LIGHTNING ATTACK.
Link: Ooooooomph. 5100-7900
Link: I sacrifice Giant Soldier for Millenium Shield. 0/3000. Repels your attack.
Cloud: Darn. * Draws Card* I summon Big Shield Gardna in Defense. 100/2600
Link: Yes. Germ INFECTION TO BLUE EYES.
Cloud: NOOOOOOOO.
Link: Yes. Every turn, it will get weaker and weaker.
Cloud: *Draws Card* I special Summon The Rock Spirit by removing Celtic Guardian from the game. I then sacrifice The Rock Spirit and Big Shield Gardna to Summon ANOTHER BLUE EYES WHITE DRAGON.
Audience: *GASPS* ANOTHER BLUE EYES.
Cloud: That's right. * Combs hair with hands like Link*
Link: Hey you copied me.
Cloud: So what?
Link: Fine. I play horn of light on Millenium Shield.
Cloud: My turn. *Draws Card* I place one monster face down, switch blue eyes to defense.
Link: My turn. * Draws Card* I activate Dark Piercing Light.
Cloud: That flips the magician of faith. I can now return Flute of Summoning dragon. And now RAIGEKI. BLUE EYES WHITE DRAGON ATTACK. 2100- 7900. Blue EYES ATTACK
Link No way: I activate Offerings to the doomed to destroy Lord of D. Then use MIRROR FORCE.
Cloud: GAHHHHHHH. Not my Precious Blue eyes. You will pay for that.
Link: I now summon the Lord of D. and play flute of summoning Dragon. Summon TWO BLUE EYES WHITE DRAGONS
Audience: *Gasps*
Link: BOTH ATTACK NOW. 2100-1900
Cloud: *draws card* I activate 7 magic cards. Change of Heart on one of your blue eyes. I play Monster reborn and Premature Burial to gain two more blue eyes. 2100-1100. Then I play Tremendous Fire. 1100-600, then Ookazi. 300-600. Now Activate facedown card. Another magician of Faith. Raigeki NOW. Now I shall do the undone. The unstoppable. The never done before. POLYMERIZATION. ALL THREE BLUE EYES TURN INTO THE BLUE EYES ULTIMATE DRAGON. Attack with Neutron Blast!
Link: No WAY IN HELL. NEGATE ATTACK!
Cloud: Fine.
Link: I play polymerization again to summon the BLUE EYES ULTIMATE DRAGON AS WELL
Blue eyes ulti ate vs blue eyes ultimate. Someone needed to tip it in their favor.
Link: Horn of the UNICORN. ATTCK
Cloud: RUSH RECKLESSLY ATTACK.
5200vs5200. Both blue eyes ultimates die.
Link: And I summon this card facaedown for defense. Your turn.
Cloud: You won't escape this. PolyMERIZATION. FUSE SALAMANDRA, RED EYES BLACK METAL DRAGON blah blah blah dragon blah blah blah blah dragon and METEOR BLACK DRAGON. FUSE INTO.... THE ALMIGHTY MYTHIC DRAGON!!!!
5000/5000
Cloud: ATTACK THE FACEDOWN CARD.
Nimble Momonga.
Cloud: Darn. 1300-600
Link: Now my turn. Paralyzing Potion.
Cloud: HAHAHAHA. You fool. There is one head unaffected. It is my red eyes black metal dragon. HAHAHHAHAHA.
Link: And play Germ Infection. And a facedown card.
Cloud: Sigh. *Draws card* YES!!!!! I NOW ACTIVATE CALL OF THE HAUNTED to REVIVE THE BLUE EYES ULTIMATE DRAGON. I NOW ACTIVATE THE BLACK LUSTER RITUAL AND SACRIFICE THE MYTHIC DRAGON TO SUMMON BLACK LUSTER SOLDIER.
Link: YOU CRAZY FOOL!
Cloud: NO. WATCH THIS. POLYMERIZATION (A/N a person may only have up to 3 copies of the same card unless it is limited or semi-limited.) TO FUSE INTO THE ULTMATE CREATURE. DRAGON MASTER KNIGHT! ATTACK.
Link: SWORDS OF REVEALING LIGHT
Cloud: Witch of the black forest
Link: Witch of the black forest.
Link: Attack now!
Both get right arm of forbidden one
Link and Cloud: SANGAN ATTACK.
Both get left arm.
Both draw right leg on their turns.
Cloud:Summmon this card
Link: Monster Reborm Witch of the black forest.
Cloud: *Draws left leg*. Magician of Faith! Monster Reborn Witch of the black forest.
Link: *Draws left leg* Witch of the black foest attack!
Link: I have won. You are now Screwed. Get whatever pathetic card you wanna get.
Cloud: Pathetic? Jeez. I'll show you pathetic.
Link & Cloud: EXODIA THE FORBIDDEN ONE. I SUMMON YOU NOW. OBLIDERATE!
Both exodias die.
Cloud: I summon giant soldier in defense.
Link: I summon feral imp in defense
Cloud: I summon Shining Abyss in defense.
Link: I summon La Jinn
Cloud: I summon Dunames the Dark Witch. And I place one card facedown.
Link: Fool. I sacrifice both monsters to summon Dark Magician.
Cloud: Trap HOLE. Now my turn. *draws card* I sacrifice Giant soldier and shining Abyss to summon Dark magician. Next I play dark magic curtain to summon another Dark Magician from my deck. Two different looking dark magicians are on the field. HAHAHA. Funny. ATTACK
Link: NEGATE ATTACK # 2!
Link: I summon Millenium Shield #2.
Cloud: *Draws Card* I activate Dian Keto the cure master. Then 1300-1600. Then I play Dark Magic Curtain AGAIN! DARK MAGICIAN #3 !
I, the Author, have the responsibility why I wanted to have 3 dark magicians. Here's why. THEY LOOK DIFFERENT. THERE ARE THREE TYPES OF DARK MAGICIAN. I will explain their differences. Dark Magician #1= Gay. Purple Robe. What seems like Purple hair, MALE, a staff/scepter thing that is green. Mean face with different expressions. Master at doing tricks with his staff. Dark Magician #2= half as gay. No idea the color of hair, slightly different colored purple robe, green skin (?) and a staff that looks the same. Dark Magician #3= Cool and non-gay. Evil face, with white hair.And his white hair fits him just like Sephiroth. Instead of Purple robe, he wears dark weird orange-reddish robe (So much non-gayness compared to the other two). Looks extremely evil.
Cloud: I NOW PLAY FISSURE.
Link: NOOOOOOOOOOo.
CLOUD: ATTACK ALL THREE DARDK MAGICIANS AT THE SAME TIME.
Link: NOOOOOOOOOO OW! OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OW! OOOOOOOOOOOOO OW!
Cloud won
Cloud: GO me. It's my birthday. We gonna party like it's my birthday.
Aeris: Great sense of humor Cloud.
Cloud: No, I'm serious. IT IS my birthday. How could you forget?
Tifa: Is today Tuesday already?
Cloud: Yeah. *Goes into the corner by himself*
Aeris: Cloud! I'm Sorry. Come on Cloud come back here. Please Cloud. Cloud!!! Come back here!! Please!
Tifa: Cloud! But you never told me your ... No wait you did. But still I'm so sorry Cloud. Cloud! You're so unmanageable.
Sora: AHHHHHHHHHH. *Thump*
Link: Sora since when were you in Room 1?
Sora: The guards were stupid and so they placed me in room 6.
Cloud: I see.
Link: Wanna talk ALONE and AWAY form the girls?
Sora: Sure.
Link: Let's play truth or dare by ourselves.
Zelda: I heard THAT.
Cloud: Sure.
Link: Sora, you start off.
Sora: Okay. Cloud, Truth or Dare?
Cloud: I'll start the match with a dare.
Sora: :) I dare you to go there where the girls are and do the Kirby dance. When done, you're kiss Tifa AND Aeris. Then come back.
Cloud:.......................
Zelda: I heard THAT!!!! THAT DARE!
Cloud: Zelda shut up.
Link: Great Sora. You spoiled it. You big mouth
Sora: Link, Shut up. Cloud, you still gotta do it.
Cloud: *Sigh* Alright.
Gets up and does the Kirby dance to all the girls.
Cloud: ^-^) (^'-'^) (v'-'v) ^-^) (^'-'^) (v'-'v) ^-^) (^'-'^) (v'-'v) ^-^) (^'-'^) (v'-'v)
Aeris: Cloud!!!! That is SOOOOOOO CUTE.
Tifa: Cloud do that dance again.
Cloud: NO. I prefer something else.
Kisses Tifa on the lips, everyone goes oooooooooooooohhhhhhhhhhhhh, then kisses Aeris on the lips. Then walks back.
Sora: * Laughing* THAT WAS SO FUNNY. *Imitating Aeris' Voice* "THAT WAS SO CUTE" HAHAHAHAHA.
Cloud: Link Truth Or Dare?
Link: Truth.
Cloud: Which of those girls do you like the best?
Link: It is *Whisper*
Cloud: *Gasps* You're kidding right?
Link: Embarassingly, no.
Sora: Who who?
Cloud: *Whisper whisper*
Sora: NO WAY. THAT's A LIE.
Link: No. It's the truth.
Sora: Cloud, do you believe him?
Cloud: HELL NO. THAT IS REDICULOUS. NOT POSSIBLE.
Link: Well it is. That's why it's happening.
Cloud: Sora, who do you like?
Sora: Fine. It's Kairi.
Zelda: I heard that. Tee hee.
Sora: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Link: Cloud, what about you?
Cloud: I'd say Aeris.
Sephiroth: I have CHOSEN HAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHA. Guards, take the one named Aeris and have her chained up and come to this room.
Guards: Aeris, you're coming with us.
Cloud: Oh no you aren't *Slices guards in half*
Guards start coming, then Hunter Killers come.
Aeris: Cloud, HELP! HELP!
It was too late for Aeris.
Inside Sephiroth's main room
Sephiroth: Chain her next to that wall over there. Yes there. You are excused.
Aeris: Sephiroth, you are insane.
Sephiroth: Well then.....
Goes up to Aeris. Aeris closes her eyes preparing for the worst, but didn't expect a KISS from Sephiroth!!!!!!!!!!
Aeris: *Muffled in kiss* MFFMFMFMFFMMFMMMMMMMMFMMFMMMMFMFFM.
Sephiroth: HAAAAAAAAA. Your lips are softer than I thought. Well if Cloud wasn't being such a jerk, I'd either have you or Tifa by now.
Aeris: What?
Sephiroth: Cloud demanded 2 girls, so the producers took one away from me. With a female guidance I could've been nice and kind and heroic.
Aeris: Oh Seph. It's alright. Give me a hug.
Sephiroth: :)
Aeris: :)
Sephiroth then pulls out his sword and swings it at Aeris
Aeris: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.
Sephiroth stops short right next to Aeris' neck.
Sephiroth: ...*Noticeable breaths* .... I can't do this. I can't kill an innocent girl like this. I can't kill you like before. UGH. I'm going downstairs. DON'T READ ANY OF MY PERSONAL FILES.
Downstairs
Cloud: Sephiroth, get back here.
Sephiroth: Jeez I am here idiot.
Cloud: Shutup
Sephiroth: Shut up, Blonde.
Everyone else: Ooooooooooh. Shut Down. Cloud just got shut down.
Cloud: *Wimper wimper* *Cry cry*
Sephiroth: BORING. *Goes back upstairs*
Back upstairs
Aeris: HAHAHAHHAHAHHAHA. Wow. Embarrassing. And he likes
Sephiroth: I'm......... YOU READ MY PERSONAL FILES!
Aeris: Yep. Everything. Even the Diary.
Sephiroth: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOO
Sephiroth Choir: SEPHIROTH!!!!!!!!!
Sephiroth: Get away from me choir. My deepest secrets have been discovered. Now what would Cloud do? Yes, he'd kill himself. *Lies down on floor next to Aeris* Do me a favor. Kill me with my sword.
Aeris: But but but....
Sephiroth: Please do it.
Aeris: NO.
Sephiroth: *With Dark voice* HAHAHHA
Aeris: *GASPS*
Sephiroth: NO! ANSEM STAY AWAY FROM ME.
Aeris: ANSEM?!?!!?!!!!
Sephiroth: *Dark Voice* HAAHHAAHAH. Time to kill you Aeris.
Sephiroth: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOo
Sephiroth Struggled against Ansem's mind powers. He cut Aeris' chains and she ran for it.
Downstairs.
Aeris: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.
Everyone: AERIS?
Aeris unlocks the dungeon locks.
Aeris: SORA. ANSEM IS BACK. HE"S POSSESSING SEPHIROTH!
Cloud: WHAT THE HELL? WHO THE HELL IS ANSEM?
SORA: OH BOY. *Runs upstairs*
Cloud: DUDE, I'm coming too. He's not gonna last one second. *Runs upstairs*
Tifa: Cloud, WAIT! Ughhhh. You are so rash. *Runs upstairs*
Aeris: EVERYONE, GET OUT NOW.
Everyone runs out.
Upstairs
Sephiroth: GET AWAY FROM ME.
Ansem: HAHAHA. I JUST LOVE POSSESSING PEOPLE'S MINDS. I CAN TORTURE THEIR FRIENDS. OH, how I love my job.
Sora: Ansem, you will not get away from this.
Cloud: ALRIGHT THAT'S IT. KNIGHTS OF THE ROUND TABLE.
Ansem: NOOOOOOOOOOO.
Sephiroth: *Panting* Thanks Cloud. You're lucky I had a strong mind. Otherwise, Ansem would've made me kill Aeris. And I almost did too.
Cloud: You were about to kill Aeris? Now you die.
Sephiroth: NOOOOOOOOOOO.
Cloud: Swings his sword, stops right at Seph's neck.
Cloud: *Sighs* I can't kill you. You just saved Aeris.
Meanwhile
Jim: DIE CEREBRATE!
The cerebrate died, and also the hydras in the castle died.
The party then returned to normal.
Aeris: Hey, guess what? I read Seph's Personal File. With his exclusive DIARY.
Cloud: *GASPS* OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG. DO YOU KNOW HOW LONG I'VE BEEN SEARCHING FOR THAT DIARY? YOU HAVE IT NOW?
Areis: Yep. Here ya go. Happy birthday Cloud.
Cloud: You gave me Seph's DIARY for a birthday present?!!!! Wow, that's the best birthday gift you've given me. :) Now let me read this. Hmmmmmm. I see. Interesting. MUHAHAHHAHAH.Oh man. Thanks Aeris. That clears upa lot. And. *Gasps* Aeris, did you read all of this.
Aeris: Yep. Even the page of crushes. And...... It's embarrassing for him and me.
Cloud: What, he had a crush on you? I'm looking at this. OMG.
Aeris: That's right. It's scary.
Cloud: Sephiroth! YOU EVIL MANIAC. YOU ARE SO PIRVIRTED.
Sephiroth: WHAT! So a guy can't dream about a girl?
Cloud: You are SO NOT GOING OUT WITH AERIS.
Sephiroth: What? You're the jerk. I could've nice with some female guidance. You took mine, which was Aeris.
Cloud: *Sigh*
What will happen next chapter? What did Sephiroth do that was so pirvirted? And what will happen enxt? Just R&R. Thank you.
Party in the house.
Chapter 6 Under Seige
The cast is currently in the house of the Author. Specifically his room with the computer.
Here is the current situation:
Link- Tied to a chair
Zelda- Locked in the closet
Ganon- Chased around by Impa
Ruto- Tied to a chair NEXT to Link
Nabooru- Sleeping on the bed.
Rauru- Eating food
SK- Getting hyped up by sugar
Sonic- tied to a chair
Amy- hugging Sonic
Sephiroth Choir- Singing Sephiroth repeadidly
Kirby- Doing the Kirby Dance
Malon- Singing Epona's song
Saria- Trying inch closer to Link, also tied to a chair
Kenny- being tortured by a hydralisk
Jim- being "Tortured" by Infested Kerrigan
Artanis, Zeratul and Tassadar- Drunk off their heads
Sora- Making out with Kairi
Kairi- Making out with Sora
Riku- Pouting
Ylink- sleeping
Aeris- Making out with Sephiroth
Cloud- Making out with Tifa
Shadow- The only sane character apart from Author.
Author- Typing this document.
In the castle
The party was going well until...
Hydralisks appeard from the ground.
Jim: *Gasps* Hydralisks. ATTACK.
Hydralisks: Send in the reinforcements.
Overlord: Copy that.
More Hydralisk looking monsters came out.
Hunter Killers: We are the Hunter Killer. More powerful than puny Hydralisks. We are here on per order the Overmind.
Jim: No duh.
Hunter Killers: AKA Sephiroth.
Aeris: *Gasps*
Sephiroth: Cerebrate, bring in the rest of the troops.
Infested Duran: You got it.
Even more Hunter Killers came about.
Sephiroth: In the dungeons NOW.
In the dungeons of the castle
Sephiroth: As per order of the BOOK OF BAD GUYS, I must take one girl as a hostage. And torture her to make it EVIL. And no I AM NOT GAY. So MEN you may be excused.
Men huddle away, females scared to death.
Sephiroth: Hahahahahahahaahha. *To Kairi* What are you so afraid of little girl?
Kairi: N-n-n-n-n-nothing. NOTHING AT ALL.
Sephiroth: I see. Aeris. *Tries to take Aeris' hand*
Slap
Aeris: That was for killing me.
Sephiroth: Yeah. I remember the good old times.
Cloud: Stop laying on Aeris.
Sephiroth: SHUT UP YOU BLONDE.
Cloud: I'm NOT BLONDE. *Cries* WAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. I only have yellow spikey hair!
Sephiroth: Shut him up please. The first girl to shut him up is exempt.
Kairi slaps Cloud senselessly.
Kairi: SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP.
Cloud: *Sniff* Okay.
Zelda: I demand you release me.
Sephiroth: And I demand Princess Zelda gest taken to the dungeon room 13.
Zelda: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.
Sephiroth: Alright you will be grouped into separate rooms. Now in case you try and pull somehting off, there will be even more Hunter Killers waiting for my command to kill you. So don't try it. Now the rooms will be:
#1 Link & Ruto & Zelda & Saria & Wendy & Romani & Malon & Cloud & Aeris & Tifa & Sora
#2 Kenny & Hydralisks
#3 Cartman & Stan & Kyle
#4 Anju and Kafei
#5 Nabooru & Rauru & Sheik & Gannon & Impa.
#6 Riku & Kairi.
This will get interesting. Let's look at the most interesting of all. Dungeon Room #1
In #1:
Cloud: Let's play a game.
Wendy: Spin the Bottle?
Everyone: Ok.
Link and Cloud go to one side, while all the girls go to the other.
Link: So Cloud. If you had to pick, who would you pick?
Cloud: Huh? Oh. I don't know. Tifa is you know, but Aeris is HOT. So I can't decide.
Link: I see ya. I need help. See there are these five particular girls. Zelda, Ruto, Saria, Malon and Romani. They all want me. Zelda is a princess. Ruto I will NOT choose. Saria is my first friend when I had no friends. Malon gave me my horse and she is a HOT redhead. Romani a ditto of Malon.
Cloud: Jee, I don't know.
Ruto: Hey guys have you spinned yet? I was picked.
Cloud & Link: ........ YOU!
Spins bottle. Everyone comes over and sees.
Link: Come on on Cloud. Din, let it go on Cloud.
Cloud: By the Planet of this earth, let it go on Link.
It stops on Cloud
Cloud: ....................... I hate you bottle.
Cloud gives an amazingly quick peck on Ruto.
Cloud: Grrrrr.
Spins bottle again. This time again on Cloud.
Cloud: WHY ME AGAIN?
Link: It's just you and me. 50/50
Cloud: Oh yea.
Bottle lands on Zelda.
Cloud gives a small kiss on the cheek to Zelda. Zelda blushes
Zelda: (Wow he is so frickin hot, like Link.)
Spin bottle again.
Lands on Link and Malon.
Malon runs over to kiss Link. Not a fast little peck though.
Link: *Kissed* Ughhhh.
Spins bottle again. Lands on Cloud and......
Tifa: It was me.
Aeris: It was SOOOO me.
Zelda: Come on you know it's me.
Tifa: Shut up Zelda. It was me. Admit it.
Aeris: Stop lying Tifa. You just want a kiss from Cloud.
Zelda: Yeah stop lying.
Cloud: Oh boy. (I guess I gonna have to choose.)
Zelda: Shut up Aeris.
Aeris: You know it's me.
Tifa: I have better eyesight than you, your royal laziness.
Zelda: Silence!
Aeris: No it was SOOOO me.
Cloud: F-f-Fine I-I-I pick......................... .......Aeris
Everyone: ..................
Aeris: Cloud!
Cloud gives a peck in the cheek to Aeris, but Aeris returns with a peck to the mouth.
Saria: I'm bored. Hey Cloud. Aeren't you a swordsman?
Cloud: You dare call me a lowly Swordsman? How dare you! *Draws his buster sword*
Saria: AHHHHHHH.
Link blocks Cloud
Link: Cloud, Stop. I mean it.
Cloud: You should be lucky I'm guy that is nice to girls.
Saria: Well then why don't you two duel?
Cloud & Link: Sure.
They whip out their Yu-Gi-Oh dueling decks.
Cloud: You're going down. I own the mighty Blue-eyes.
Girls after Link: *Gasps* But Link doesn't have anything that strong in his Deck.
Link: But I own the Blue-eyes as well.
Link: Ha. Well let's just duel.
Link and Cloud draw five cards.
Cloud: I start the match with Celtic Guardian in the defense.
Link: Pathetic. I summon the Feral Imp and Attack.
Cloud: You are so stupid. Tribute to the DOOMED.
Discards Dark Magician to destroy Feral Imp.
Link: Fool. A Dark Magician is precious.
Cloud: Well did anyone teach you this combo? Monster Reborn. Reborn the Dark Magician. Attack!
Score: Link 5500- Cloud 8000
Link: Well that's okay, because now I summon the magic card polymreization to fuse Gaia the Fierce Knight and Curse of Dragon into Gaia the Dragon Champion. Attack!
5500-7900
Cloud: * Evil Grin* ( I have a blue eyse and swords of revealing light. This will surely decimate him, and even with whatever pathetic magic cards and trap cards he may have, cuz of my Lord of D. will help.) I play Swords of Revealing Light. And summon this card facedown defense mode.
Link: Fine. I summon Giant Soldier of Stone Defense Mode. I end my turn.
Cloud: I now flip summon Lord of D. and play the flute of Summoning Dragon to Summon the BLUE EYES WHITE DRAGON. BLUE EYES WHITE LIGHTNING ATTACK.
Link: Ooooooomph. 5100-7900
Link: I sacrifice Giant Soldier for Millenium Shield. 0/3000. Repels your attack.
Cloud: Darn. * Draws Card* I summon Big Shield Gardna in Defense. 100/2600
Link: Yes. Germ INFECTION TO BLUE EYES.
Cloud: NOOOOOOOO.
Link: Yes. Every turn, it will get weaker and weaker.
Cloud: *Draws Card* I special Summon The Rock Spirit by removing Celtic Guardian from the game. I then sacrifice The Rock Spirit and Big Shield Gardna to Summon ANOTHER BLUE EYES WHITE DRAGON.
Audience: *GASPS* ANOTHER BLUE EYES.
Cloud: That's right. * Combs hair with hands like Link*
Link: Hey you copied me.
Cloud: So what?
Link: Fine. I play horn of light on Millenium Shield.
Cloud: My turn. *Draws Card* I place one monster face down, switch blue eyes to defense.
Link: My turn. * Draws Card* I activate Dark Piercing Light.
Cloud: That flips the magician of faith. I can now return Flute of Summoning dragon. And now RAIGEKI. BLUE EYES WHITE DRAGON ATTACK. 2100- 7900. Blue EYES ATTACK
Link No way: I activate Offerings to the doomed to destroy Lord of D. Then use MIRROR FORCE.
Cloud: GAHHHHHHH. Not my Precious Blue eyes. You will pay for that.
Link: I now summon the Lord of D. and play flute of summoning Dragon. Summon TWO BLUE EYES WHITE DRAGONS
Audience: *Gasps*
Link: BOTH ATTACK NOW. 2100-1900
Cloud: *draws card* I activate 7 magic cards. Change of Heart on one of your blue eyes. I play Monster reborn and Premature Burial to gain two more blue eyes. 2100-1100. Then I play Tremendous Fire. 1100-600, then Ookazi. 300-600. Now Activate facedown card. Another magician of Faith. Raigeki NOW. Now I shall do the undone. The unstoppable. The never done before. POLYMERIZATION. ALL THREE BLUE EYES TURN INTO THE BLUE EYES ULTIMATE DRAGON. Attack with Neutron Blast!
Link: No WAY IN HELL. NEGATE ATTACK!
Cloud: Fine.
Link: I play polymerization again to summon the BLUE EYES ULTIMATE DRAGON AS WELL
Blue eyes ulti ate vs blue eyes ultimate. Someone needed to tip it in their favor.
Link: Horn of the UNICORN. ATTCK
Cloud: RUSH RECKLESSLY ATTACK.
5200vs5200. Both blue eyes ultimates die.
Link: And I summon this card facaedown for defense. Your turn.
Cloud: You won't escape this. PolyMERIZATION. FUSE SALAMANDRA, RED EYES BLACK METAL DRAGON blah blah blah dragon blah blah blah blah dragon and METEOR BLACK DRAGON. FUSE INTO.... THE ALMIGHTY MYTHIC DRAGON!!!!
5000/5000
Cloud: ATTACK THE FACEDOWN CARD.
Nimble Momonga.
Cloud: Darn. 1300-600
Link: Now my turn. Paralyzing Potion.
Cloud: HAHAHAHA. You fool. There is one head unaffected. It is my red eyes black metal dragon. HAHAHHAHAHA.
Link: And play Germ Infection. And a facedown card.
Cloud: Sigh. *Draws card* YES!!!!! I NOW ACTIVATE CALL OF THE HAUNTED to REVIVE THE BLUE EYES ULTIMATE DRAGON. I NOW ACTIVATE THE BLACK LUSTER RITUAL AND SACRIFICE THE MYTHIC DRAGON TO SUMMON BLACK LUSTER SOLDIER.
Link: YOU CRAZY FOOL!
Cloud: NO. WATCH THIS. POLYMERIZATION (A/N a person may only have up to 3 copies of the same card unless it is limited or semi-limited.) TO FUSE INTO THE ULTMATE CREATURE. DRAGON MASTER KNIGHT! ATTACK.
Link: SWORDS OF REVEALING LIGHT
Cloud: Witch of the black forest
Link: Witch of the black forest.
Link: Attack now!
Both get right arm of forbidden one
Link and Cloud: SANGAN ATTACK.
Both get left arm.
Both draw right leg on their turns.
Cloud:Summmon this card
Link: Monster Reborm Witch of the black forest.
Cloud: *Draws left leg*. Magician of Faith! Monster Reborn Witch of the black forest.
Link: *Draws left leg* Witch of the black foest attack!
Link: I have won. You are now Screwed. Get whatever pathetic card you wanna get.
Cloud: Pathetic? Jeez. I'll show you pathetic.
Link & Cloud: EXODIA THE FORBIDDEN ONE. I SUMMON YOU NOW. OBLIDERATE!
Both exodias die.
Cloud: I summon giant soldier in defense.
Link: I summon feral imp in defense
Cloud: I summon Shining Abyss in defense.
Link: I summon La Jinn
Cloud: I summon Dunames the Dark Witch. And I place one card facedown.
Link: Fool. I sacrifice both monsters to summon Dark Magician.
Cloud: Trap HOLE. Now my turn. *draws card* I sacrifice Giant soldier and shining Abyss to summon Dark magician. Next I play dark magic curtain to summon another Dark Magician from my deck. Two different looking dark magicians are on the field. HAHAHA. Funny. ATTACK
Link: NEGATE ATTACK # 2!
Link: I summon Millenium Shield #2.
Cloud: *Draws Card* I activate Dian Keto the cure master. Then 1300-1600. Then I play Dark Magic Curtain AGAIN! DARK MAGICIAN #3 !
I, the Author, have the responsibility why I wanted to have 3 dark magicians. Here's why. THEY LOOK DIFFERENT. THERE ARE THREE TYPES OF DARK MAGICIAN. I will explain their differences. Dark Magician #1= Gay. Purple Robe. What seems like Purple hair, MALE, a staff/scepter thing that is green. Mean face with different expressions. Master at doing tricks with his staff. Dark Magician #2= half as gay. No idea the color of hair, slightly different colored purple robe, green skin (?) and a staff that looks the same. Dark Magician #3= Cool and non-gay. Evil face, with white hair.And his white hair fits him just like Sephiroth. Instead of Purple robe, he wears dark weird orange-reddish robe (So much non-gayness compared to the other two). Looks extremely evil.
Cloud: I NOW PLAY FISSURE.
Link: NOOOOOOOOOOo.
CLOUD: ATTACK ALL THREE DARDK MAGICIANS AT THE SAME TIME.
Link: NOOOOOOOOOO OW! OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OW! OOOOOOOOOOOOO OW!
Cloud won
Cloud: GO me. It's my birthday. We gonna party like it's my birthday.
Aeris: Great sense of humor Cloud.
Cloud: No, I'm serious. IT IS my birthday. How could you forget?
Tifa: Is today Tuesday already?
Cloud: Yeah. *Goes into the corner by himself*
Aeris: Cloud! I'm Sorry. Come on Cloud come back here. Please Cloud. Cloud!!! Come back here!! Please!
Tifa: Cloud! But you never told me your ... No wait you did. But still I'm so sorry Cloud. Cloud! You're so unmanageable.
Sora: AHHHHHHHHHH. *Thump*
Link: Sora since when were you in Room 1?
Sora: The guards were stupid and so they placed me in room 6.
Cloud: I see.
Link: Wanna talk ALONE and AWAY form the girls?
Sora: Sure.
Link: Let's play truth or dare by ourselves.
Zelda: I heard THAT.
Cloud: Sure.
Link: Sora, you start off.
Sora: Okay. Cloud, Truth or Dare?
Cloud: I'll start the match with a dare.
Sora: :) I dare you to go there where the girls are and do the Kirby dance. When done, you're kiss Tifa AND Aeris. Then come back.
Cloud:.......................
Zelda: I heard THAT!!!! THAT DARE!
Cloud: Zelda shut up.
Link: Great Sora. You spoiled it. You big mouth
Sora: Link, Shut up. Cloud, you still gotta do it.
Cloud: *Sigh* Alright.
Gets up and does the Kirby dance to all the girls.
Cloud: ^-^) (^'-'^) (v'-'v) ^-^) (^'-'^) (v'-'v) ^-^) (^'-'^) (v'-'v) ^-^) (^'-'^) (v'-'v)
Aeris: Cloud!!!! That is SOOOOOOO CUTE.
Tifa: Cloud do that dance again.
Cloud: NO. I prefer something else.
Kisses Tifa on the lips, everyone goes oooooooooooooohhhhhhhhhhhhh, then kisses Aeris on the lips. Then walks back.
Sora: * Laughing* THAT WAS SO FUNNY. *Imitating Aeris' Voice* "THAT WAS SO CUTE" HAHAHAHAHA.
Cloud: Link Truth Or Dare?
Link: Truth.
Cloud: Which of those girls do you like the best?
Link: It is *Whisper*
Cloud: *Gasps* You're kidding right?
Link: Embarassingly, no.
Sora: Who who?
Cloud: *Whisper whisper*
Sora: NO WAY. THAT's A LIE.
Link: No. It's the truth.
Sora: Cloud, do you believe him?
Cloud: HELL NO. THAT IS REDICULOUS. NOT POSSIBLE.
Link: Well it is. That's why it's happening.
Cloud: Sora, who do you like?
Sora: Fine. It's Kairi.
Zelda: I heard that. Tee hee.
Sora: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Link: Cloud, what about you?
Cloud: I'd say Aeris.
Sephiroth: I have CHOSEN HAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHA. Guards, take the one named Aeris and have her chained up and come to this room.
Guards: Aeris, you're coming with us.
Cloud: Oh no you aren't *Slices guards in half*
Guards start coming, then Hunter Killers come.
Aeris: Cloud, HELP! HELP!
It was too late for Aeris.
Inside Sephiroth's main room
Sephiroth: Chain her next to that wall over there. Yes there. You are excused.
Aeris: Sephiroth, you are insane.
Sephiroth: Well then.....
Goes up to Aeris. Aeris closes her eyes preparing for the worst, but didn't expect a KISS from Sephiroth!!!!!!!!!!
Aeris: *Muffled in kiss* MFFMFMFMFFMMFMMMMMMMMFMMFMMMMFMFFM.
Sephiroth: HAAAAAAAAA. Your lips are softer than I thought. Well if Cloud wasn't being such a jerk, I'd either have you or Tifa by now.
Aeris: What?
Sephiroth: Cloud demanded 2 girls, so the producers took one away from me. With a female guidance I could've been nice and kind and heroic.
Aeris: Oh Seph. It's alright. Give me a hug.
Sephiroth: :)
Aeris: :)
Sephiroth then pulls out his sword and swings it at Aeris
Aeris: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.
Sephiroth stops short right next to Aeris' neck.
Sephiroth: ...*Noticeable breaths* .... I can't do this. I can't kill an innocent girl like this. I can't kill you like before. UGH. I'm going downstairs. DON'T READ ANY OF MY PERSONAL FILES.
Downstairs
Cloud: Sephiroth, get back here.
Sephiroth: Jeez I am here idiot.
Cloud: Shutup
Sephiroth: Shut up, Blonde.
Everyone else: Ooooooooooh. Shut Down. Cloud just got shut down.
Cloud: *Wimper wimper* *Cry cry*
Sephiroth: BORING. *Goes back upstairs*
Back upstairs
Aeris: HAHAHAHHAHAHHAHA. Wow. Embarrassing. And he likes
Sephiroth: I'm......... YOU READ MY PERSONAL FILES!
Aeris: Yep. Everything. Even the Diary.
Sephiroth: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOO
Sephiroth Choir: SEPHIROTH!!!!!!!!!
Sephiroth: Get away from me choir. My deepest secrets have been discovered. Now what would Cloud do? Yes, he'd kill himself. *Lies down on floor next to Aeris* Do me a favor. Kill me with my sword.
Aeris: But but but....
Sephiroth: Please do it.
Aeris: NO.
Sephiroth: *With Dark voice* HAHAHHA
Aeris: *GASPS*
Sephiroth: NO! ANSEM STAY AWAY FROM ME.
Aeris: ANSEM?!?!!?!!!!
Sephiroth: *Dark Voice* HAAHHAAHAH. Time to kill you Aeris.
Sephiroth: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOo
Sephiroth Struggled against Ansem's mind powers. He cut Aeris' chains and she ran for it.
Downstairs.
Aeris: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.
Everyone: AERIS?
Aeris unlocks the dungeon locks.
Aeris: SORA. ANSEM IS BACK. HE"S POSSESSING SEPHIROTH!
Cloud: WHAT THE HELL? WHO THE HELL IS ANSEM?
SORA: OH BOY. *Runs upstairs*
Cloud: DUDE, I'm coming too. He's not gonna last one second. *Runs upstairs*
Tifa: Cloud, WAIT! Ughhhh. You are so rash. *Runs upstairs*
Aeris: EVERYONE, GET OUT NOW.
Everyone runs out.
Upstairs
Sephiroth: GET AWAY FROM ME.
Ansem: HAHAHA. I JUST LOVE POSSESSING PEOPLE'S MINDS. I CAN TORTURE THEIR FRIENDS. OH, how I love my job.
Sora: Ansem, you will not get away from this.
Cloud: ALRIGHT THAT'S IT. KNIGHTS OF THE ROUND TABLE.
Ansem: NOOOOOOOOOOO.
Sephiroth: *Panting* Thanks Cloud. You're lucky I had a strong mind. Otherwise, Ansem would've made me kill Aeris. And I almost did too.
Cloud: You were about to kill Aeris? Now you die.
Sephiroth: NOOOOOOOOOOO.
Cloud: Swings his sword, stops right at Seph's neck.
Cloud: *Sighs* I can't kill you. You just saved Aeris.
Meanwhile
Jim: DIE CEREBRATE!
The cerebrate died, and also the hydras in the castle died.
The party then returned to normal.
Aeris: Hey, guess what? I read Seph's Personal File. With his exclusive DIARY.
Cloud: *GASPS* OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG. DO YOU KNOW HOW LONG I'VE BEEN SEARCHING FOR THAT DIARY? YOU HAVE IT NOW?
Areis: Yep. Here ya go. Happy birthday Cloud.
Cloud: You gave me Seph's DIARY for a birthday present?!!!! Wow, that's the best birthday gift you've given me. :) Now let me read this. Hmmmmmm. I see. Interesting. MUHAHAHHAHAH.Oh man. Thanks Aeris. That clears upa lot. And. *Gasps* Aeris, did you read all of this.
Aeris: Yep. Even the page of crushes. And...... It's embarrassing for him and me.
Cloud: What, he had a crush on you? I'm looking at this. OMG.
Aeris: That's right. It's scary.
Cloud: Sephiroth! YOU EVIL MANIAC. YOU ARE SO PIRVIRTED.
Sephiroth: WHAT! So a guy can't dream about a girl?
Cloud: You are SO NOT GOING OUT WITH AERIS.
Sephiroth: What? You're the jerk. I could've nice with some female guidance. You took mine, which was Aeris.
Cloud: *Sigh*
What will happen next chapter? What did Sephiroth do that was so pirvirted? And what will happen enxt? Just R&R. Thank you.