Warning: Very sad, violence, YAOI - don't like, don't read
Rating: Umm... I think it's R, but I may be wrong.
Genre: Drama/Angst
Disclaimer: Again? ........ sigh Ok, I don't own Naruto. Happy? But seriously isn't it obvious?
Summary: Someone is abused and can't do anything about it. Abuse came to higher level. What will happen? Will he survive? Will he break? [Sasu/Naru] [Gaara/Naru]
Important: Well, in my story Team 7 is 15 years old. And you graduate Ninja Academy at age 13. It's somehow Naruto POV, although I'm not good in those things. It's my first story! I'm not very good in writing in English, but I hope you will understand my story. If I made any mistakes please don't blame me too much. Oh, and this is my first story. Don't be too harsh on me. Please review, I would be very happy even if it would be an abuse.
Thanks to: All of you. You are such a wonderful people. I'm so happy you liked my story. It really is great feeling.
Special thanks to:
My first three reviewers. It's for you! I'm really sorry but I don't remember your names. I only looked at your reviews for two minutes or so (I looked at mum work when she was gone and she hate what I'm writing - I hope you'll understand). And someone pointed out that I've got something wrong with... eee... singed something wrong. I already corrected it. Thanks!
Now, on the story. I'm sure you want to find out what happened next, right?
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Chapter 1: Broken heart and cure for pain
I'm confused and I feel weird
I feel like caught bird
I can't see my cage but can feel it
Because I can't defend myself and be freed
What is he doing? I couldn't find answer for this question. Now his hands are touching ma where no one has. And he's touching me like nobody has. It feels... wrong. I don't want it! But what can I do?
"Sa... Sasuke... Stop." He just smirks. "Stop, please." It's wrong, it feels dirty. "Stop it Sasuke! Sto--hmm!!!" He kiss me again, this time to shut me up. Now his hands trap mine. His mouth is near my ear. And I can hear his whisper
"Stop struggling." He's kissing my check, neck and than collarbone.
"No, stop!" I'm almost screaming. His head is buried in my chest. I can feel his smirk against my skin.
"Why should I? I have already waited long enough." Now only one hand holds my wrists in tight grip. The other one is reaching my pants. He press his body to mine and my face turn white. I can feel his hard manhood against my stomach. That shouldn't be happening! They taught us that such a thing should happen when man is with a woman, not man with man! But if he's hard that mean...
Oh God, no. No. No. No, no, no, no, no, no!!!
This can't be happening!
He can't... He can't... He can't want me...
Man can't be with another man.
Right?
"Naruto..." Oh God, his hand! His hand! It's in my pants. He... He... No! He can't... He can't touch me there!
"Naruto... you are..." Stop! Don't touch me! Go away! Away! "Naruto you are so... adorable" He's touching me there, oh God. He's gentle. But I want him to stop.
"No... Stop... Sasuke! Please, stop!" I struggle even more. I free one hand and I try to get him off. He wants to kiss me again to shut me up. I don't want! I don't want! I don't--!
CRACK
Oh my god! What have I done?! I... I... I... hited him! I broke my promise! I broke my word! What have I done?! What have I--?!
"You ungrateful bitch! I wanted to be nice to you!" Nice?! "But if you want it hard way, fine! Better for me!" His eyes! His eyes! His eyes are red! "I'm gonna make you wish you where never born, you dirty slut!" He strikes my head. I look in to his eyes. and I can't move myself away. I'm terrified.
"Sasuke!" I actually sob "Please stop!" Now I know what he wants. And...
I'm really afraid and I'm really scared
Because he's acting like a hungry cat
He's like a predator and I feel like his pray
All I want to do now is to get away!
"Please Sasuke... Stop! I beg you! Stop!"
"Shut the fucking hell up!" He grips me by my throat and picks me up. He throws me on bed. No, Please, no!
"Sasuke... Stop! Plea--!" He kiss me again. This time roughly. It's nothing like earlier. It's demanding. It's harsh. It's... horrible.
"Shut up." I can't move He bounded me with chakra. I can't free myself.
"Please Sasuke, don't. Don't do this."
"SHUT UP!" He does some seals and I can't reach my voice. "That's better. Now where was I?" He asks and his eyes are watching me hungrily. I shiver. My mind spins like crazy. It can't be true. It has to be some kind of nightmare.
He bites my neck and sucks my blood. Than his mouth came lower and lower. It's worse than before, he's really rough, uncaring and harsh. His mouth reaches my member. He's not nice at all, yet my body betray me. It felt wrong and dirty yet it aroused me. That's when he stops.
"So you like it rough after all. It looks like I was right. You are a slut. Than..." His smirk is even bigger. I want to hide, run - even die, just to get away from him! "I don't have to be gentle after all."
I'm naked on my bed. He's naked as well. I can see him and his penis is big. I can feel his heat and his... it is called lust I think.
He grabs me by hairs and my head is near his member. God... He can't mean...
"Suck." He commands. I don't want to. I'm trying to pull my head away but I can't. "I said SUCK!" He forces my mouth open and shove himself in. I want to gag. He pulls out, than shove again. And again, and again, and again. Faster and harder with each thrust. I can hear him moaning. Than he climax. I can feel him in my mouth. My throat hurt. He's still there. I want to vomit. But he won't let me. "Swallow." I don't want to but he makes me. I swallow. His semen is awful in taste. I want to curl up but he doesn't let me.
"That was good, slut." I want to get away. I hope it's over. His penis is still in my mouth and I feel him moving in and out and with horror I realize he's hard again. "Now, lets do something nicer." He said and I want to die.
He pulls away. I don't know if should I be happy he's gone from my mouth or be afraid of what comes next. He shoves my legs apart and touches me with his hands.
"Beautiful... So fucking beautiful..." He's kissing me again and again. Than he stops. I want to believe it's over but I know it's not. He grips my hips and whisper in my ear
"Now lets see how much of slut you truly are...." He move little and--
GOD!!!!! STOP!!!! NO!!! NO! NO! STOP!!! NOOO!!!! STOOOOP!!!!!
Oh gods, it HURT!!! So much, so much, so much...!
He forced himself in to me. I feel like he's tearing me apart. God, It hurt, it hurt, it hurt! He's too big. It HURT! It hurt, hurt, hurt too much!
I know I'm bleeding. STOP! STOP! STOP!!!
I'm silently screaming, I'm crying openly. My vision is blurry from tears. I want pain to go away. It hurt so much. It's burning through me. I can't believe I didn't rip apart.
He's panting heavily and he's moaning my name.
"God...! So tight...! So fucking tight...! God, Naruto...!" I want to get away, away from him. I want him to stop, to die, to vanish. I want him to stop even if it kills me. Sasuke, stop!
"Naruto...!" His movements are faster and faster. Harder and harder. Wilder and wilder. Rougher and rougher. They hurt more and more and more.
"Naruto!" He's digging violently in and out. It hurt even more and I almost blank out from pain. I wish I had. The pain is unbearable.
Than he cum again. I can fell his seed in me and I don't want to. I feel so dirty, so used, so... so... I can't find words to describe this disgusting feeling.
He put his clothes on. Than pat me on my head. "You where a very good fuck. Maybe, no, for sure we'll do this again. Bye slut!" He kiss me hard and walk away.
Oh god, how could he? Doesn't he know how much he has hurt me? Doesn't he see?
I can feel his chakra leaving my body. I know I can move, but I'm afraid of pain. I know my body is hurt badly. I'm so ashamed. I couldn't do anything and I broke my promise. I'm scared. I want to die. I don't want to be hurt again.
I want to get up but the pain shot through me. I'm lying in my bed. Bed cowered with blood. My own blood. I lay here and I'm thinking about what have you done.
I can't move, I almost can't breathe
What have happened I can't believe
I feel so betrayed and the traitor is you
My only wish is to find a cure
I don't want feel hurt, I don't want feel shame
I want to forget what have happened here
And you know what? I found a cure. If I have any emotions I can get hurt. But you know what? Today my heart was broken. And it has hurt too much. My heart is now broken and I'll make it freeze. When my heart will be frozen I won't feel any emotions and feelings. And I won't get hurt. Easy, right?
I just won't care.
I won't care about village and people anymore.
I won't care about feelings - mine or someone else.
I won't care about myself.
I won't care about physical pain.
So I stand up - even if my body doesn't want.
So I wash myself - even if it hurts.
So I clean up this bloody mess - even if I shudder while doing this.
So I throw away my diary - even if someone could read it.
So I will make my heart freeze - even if it's hard
And you know what?
I think I made it.
And you know what?
It already helps.
It has hurt so much but now I feel numb
I don't feel any pain, I don't feel sad
I don't want revenge, I don't feel shame
Am I broken beyond repair?
Yay! This chapter is longer. Can you believe I wrote this in my notebook at school? It took me 1, 2, 3......8 lessons! But it's unhealthy for my grades.
Anyway, how did you like it? I'm not an experienced writer. If it sucks - tell me. I don't know if you liked my poems but I hope so .
And... Should I finish here or not?
This update came really fast but I don't know when the next will come. I'm updating it at school. Sorry. I'm open for any ideas. Until next time!!!