Disclaimer: You never know...

A/N: Can I just say I really do love you guys reviewing. And can all the people who are reading my story in secret and not reviewing, PLEASE COME OUT OF THE STORY-READING CLOSET. COME OUT AND TELL ME YOU ARE READING MY STORY. Tell me about yourselves...about my story...tell me...feed me your love (if you hate my story, than you won't have got this far in my story so you won't be reading this ands so you won't review. So we all win. Losers. WOOOO!!!

TT: "Oh goddess no" Um, excuth me? "oh GODDESS no" "oh GODDESS no" seriously Tian, GODDESS. What goddess would that be? I take it you aren't talking about me, otherwise you way say God...

Nice Hayley: Oooh, are a member of Meg Cabot's book clubby thingy? I AM. I AM. No seriously. Hahaha. I can't believe you guys are already outta school. When do you go back???

Alexis De Silva: Keep up the disco dancing!! Where do you come from mystery- obsessive-Alexis-DE-SILVA? I am truly curious. If you say Spain, I am setting those men in white coats on you so fast you won't even have time to say "Nombre de dios!"

AngelicHalo: Don't think your name disguising your completely Unangelic side. Cos it doesn't. I will make sure ALL know just how unangelic you are, you crazy, unangelic fool, you. Also, I totally got you on MSN. It's only a matter of time until we bump into each other on it...only a matter of time...be afraid, Kat, be very afraid... I know I am!

Kewine: Oh how I look forward to your long reviews, seriously, they make my day. It's like I'm talking to a real person. But I know you're just a robot. I know. (I have also had a rubarb and custard flavoured vodka shot and a peach vodka perry martini cocktail. I am feeling quite the merry gentleman. And he has a v nice body! (get it? I said I was feeling him when really I meant...oh never mind)) Can I just say that I go to a private school which could be classed as a larger version of your Tag thingy, so I am MORTALLY OFFENDED. Kinda. If I was less tipsy I may be, anyway. Nah, you're to nice to be angry at. Or are you...? Doo doo doo doo... Now, when the devil are you gonna put up your story on Fanfic??? Cos girl, you are so putting it up. Even if I have to go all the way to the US of A and PIN YOU TO THE COMPUTER KEYBOARD AND STAPLE YOUR FINGERS TO THE KEYS, USING MONKEYS TO DANCE ON YOUR HANDS WITH SPIKED TRAINERS, PUSHING YOUR FINGERS ONTO THE KEYS AND PUTTING YOUR STORY ONTO FANFIC. I am serious. There is a glint in my eye. A mighty dangerous glint. Don't even think about running away to Mexico. I will hunt you down. With a troop of monkeys in tow.

Gothic Granny: Lolly pop...doo doo doo doo doo...you make my heart goooo giddy up...doo doo doo doo doo...you are as sweet as candy...oooh...you are my sugar dandy...whoa whoa whoa whoa... OH OH, and I know YOU are part of Meg Cabot's book club. Spreading your love... Poor suckers, they never stood a chance ;- D Why did you have to sing "I Will Survive" in your school assembly? What kind of school do you go to??? Man, you Americans are odder than I thought.

Brittany: Hahaha, I love Paul. You love Paul. But...does Suze? Ah, who cares. I control her now, I can make her do what I want. MOOWHAHAHAHAAA!!!

So this is how God feels...

As I opened my eyes, squinting in the sudden harsh light, that feeling of power that had been like an aura around me was suddenly blown away. What was I doing? This was a bad idea, Suze. Real bad.

But there was no going back now. Especially when Father D was clutching me so tightly.

"Whoa, Father Dom, someone die? You look like you've seen a ghost!" I slowly pushed my self up so I was half-lying on the floor with my wobbly arms supporting me.

"Oh Susannah!" Father D didn't let go of his iron grip he had on my arm. "I had no idea what had happened to you! One moment, you were weeping hysterically in my arms," I cringed at the memory, "and the next you were completely lifeless! I was seriously considering calling the paramedics!"

I felt a bit bad then. All that time I had been worrying about myself – and how Father Dom would react to how I had "dealt" with Sean – when he had been down here, not knowing what had happened to me.

"Sorry, Father Dom, I just needed to get away for a bit. And seems like now- a-days Shadowland is the only place I can go for an all-expenses paid spa break without the kids interrupting." Father D looked at me as if I had been speaking in tongues.

"Shadowland is quiet." I said shortly. But the good ol' priest still looked troubled.

"Susannah, I honestly don't think it's a good idea to use that...place," he hesitated for so long looking for the right word I was beginning to think he may have gone for a quick trip there himself, "as a getaway from any emotional troubles you're going through. Need I remind you it is a place for the dead?"

A little shiver seemed to go through the room and I looked down, instantly regretting it as the lead weight in my head bore down on the inside of my forehead.

"Nnnngh," I moaned intelligently.

"Is anything wrong, Susannah?" Father D's long white eyebrows were woven together with worry.

"Just a little Shadowland hangover, that's all. It'll fade in a couple of hours." I started to stand but instantly over balanced and toppled back, the usual bright California sunlight streaming through the window was now unbearable and felt like a million toothpicks stabbing at the back of my eyeballs.

Not nice.

Father Dom captured my arm in his frighteningly tight grip, for an old man, and led me over to his armchair.

"Susannah, I think it would be best for you to wait here until the end of school, you're clearly not up to lessons and you've already missed most of school anyway, it would be a tad inconspicuous for you to go back to lessons now."

I nodded then stopped as soon as I began.

Suddenly a picture of my bed popped into my head. My comfy, cool, shadowy bed. Waiting for me.

"Father D, I really think I'd be better at home, lying down. I'm sure I can make it back there. Look, I can already stand on my own," to punctuate this fallible lie, I stood up. It took all my physical – and mental – strength not to collapse back into the chair that suddenly seemed so appealing.

Father D began to object but I quickly shut him up.

"Look, Father D, I need some time to think, and I'm not gonna get any better sat here in this stuff office. Tell Brad I went home early cos I was ill and it'll all be fine. Seriously. I just...really need to get home. Please?"

I gave him the irresistible puppy dog eyes.

Father D rolled his and waved his hand in admittance and defeat.

I squeaked my thank you and half ran, half limped out of the room.

I can't for the life of me remember anything about the walk home I was so busy concentrating on not collapsing in a sweaty, gasping heap.

I somehow managed my way up the stairs and into my room, where I fell into a sound sleep.

"Susie, Susie..." I grunted as the voice broke into my deep warm unconsciousness and the breath tickled my ear and neck. "Susie, honey, come on. It's dinnertime."

I peeled my eyes back and the stabbing pain that had been unavoidably prominent a few hours ago was slowly fading. Fading, but still noticeably there.

I managed a weak smile. "Hey mom." A huge yawn broke from my body and it lasted for about five minutes. My jaw was seriously aching afterwards.

Mom gave a small warm smile back then walked out of the room.

After one more fit of rigorous stretching – I must have looked like someone was sticking a rod into me and was moving it about inside – and several jaw- breaking yawns later, I slowly trudged downstairs noticing how needlessly bright the houselights were.

I plonked down into my usual chair at the table and rubbed my eyes apathetically whilst the family tucked into the gourmet food. I gazed round at my mother and Andy and his offspring in disgusted-shock. My appetite was gone as I gawked at them stuffing their faces as if it were the last meal they would ever eat. I felt acidic bile rising in the back of my throat and quashed it down. I reached a shaking hand out for my water and swallowed it roughly, my headache was coming back full blast and suddenly my stomach was feeling like something out of Earthquake 10.5.

"Urm, you know what, mom? I'm not-" my stomach convulsed and I jammed my mouth shut. "I'm not feeling too good. I think I'm gonna hit the hay early tonight." I rose unsteadily from my chair.

"Oh, Suze, honey. Are you sure? Maybe some food will make you feel better," mom tilted her plate towards me and I got a fresh whiff of pungent four cheese pasta.

There was no quashing the bile this time. Instead, I threw my hand over my mouth and ran into the toilet, unleashing the stirring dragon within. Not a particularly pretty or fragrant dragon either.

I heard footsteps thundering down the hallway towards me. A moment later my mom was kneeling beside me holding back my hair and Andy was frowning sympathetically, while warily hovering on the threshold of the toilet. Doc was peeking curiously – too curiously for my liking – from behind his father.

Mom made soothing whale noises ( I swear to God, that's what they sounded like, she should make her own tape) while I continued to barf.

When I was done I resignedly rested my head on the (clean) rim of the toilet bowl, breathing in through the nose...out through the mouth...in through the nose...out through the mouth.

I slowly stood up and washed my face in the sink, mom still holding back my hair and Andy and Doc still standing unhelpfully (well what did I expect? They were men) by the door. When I was feeling only slightly more cleansed and refreshed, I made my way unstably up to my bedroom.

I don't remember my mom changing me into my PJs, fetching me a glass of water, placing a bowl by my bed (in case I needed to unleash any more dragons), or mopping my sweaty, clammy face with a cool damp cloth. But she did. Like all mothers do when their child is ill, she sat by me soothing and calming me until I was nestled in a fitful sleep.

When I awoke, it was to dappled, yellow sunlight, streaming in through a gap in my curtains as the midmorning sun still rose across peaceful Carmel.

Someone was stroking their soft back of their across my forehead. They stopped when I opened my eyes. My still-focusing eyes drifted over to this person.

I started a half smile to thank my mom for being so nice to me and sitting up with me all night but stopped.

It wasn't mom.