Ron's Diary
Okay, I have decided that I will put up a diary for each person who will have a diary, but If you have any other people that I should do a diary on, I will, provided that they suit me. I will *NEVER* do a diary for Pansy, Crab, Goyle, or Cho Chang, the first three because there too stupid, and Cho because I don't have any inkling as to what she would actually write in her diary that I could destort and destroy. But just about any one else.... If I don't want to do someone that you bring up, I will send a personal email telling you why I do not want to, so there will be no need to write it into this story. But anyway, that is my peace for this time. Ciao!
Hand written letter found in a treasure box-
Dear Diary,
I am to poor to buy a diary, but I have enough parchment that I can write and hide the letters. I don't get that. Why must I be the poor one! I am the pretty one! All the woman send me fan letters! I don't understand why they keep spelling my name wrong though.... They keep sending me letters that say 'Dear Legolas'.... they must have given me that name as a nick name. I can't understand all these fans... Yes, I know that I am devishly handsome, but my name is alright. I don't need a new one.
Mione is scaring me. She keeps asking Draco out, and I don't get why. She hated him for how many years, then up and decides that he is cute. I am the cute one! I am the sidekick, after all.
***Miss Cassi says you mean that annoying guy who stands by Harry's side and kicks him into shape?***
Yeah, thats it.
***Miss Cassi says I didn't know that Hermione offered her services as on of those...***
Hey, neither did I! Where did you hear that from???
***Miss Cassi slaps her head in frustration.***
Oh well. Hey, did I mention, you cheap form of a diary, that Moaning Myrtle likes Harry? I think he might like her too.... I can't imagine why.... I wouldn't want to kiss something that is going to make me freeze... But, if Harry wants to, I suppose that he could commit suicide and then share her u-bend. But that is all up to personal preference. As far as I'm conscerned if he wants to be in a toilet, then I could just give him a swirly. But, he says that he doesn't have a crush on her. Then, he also said that he didn't want to go to Hogsmeade. Wait, does that mean he has a crush on Draco? Because Hermione said that he only didn't want her to go out with him because he wanted to go out with Draco.... And he said no.... Does that mean that he is... No, madness to suggest it. Gay??
Ron Weasly, Gryffindor Extrordinair
Hand written letter found in a treasure box-
Dear Diary,
I asked Harry if he had a crush on Draco, and I am now sure that my best friend is gay, as he said no. Wait, does that mean he has a crush on Hermione to??? Oh well. I took out his fire bolt today, and he kicked the shit out of me for it because he said that I was getting it dirty... He's the one getting that fine broom dirty, rubbing his grimy, gay hands all over it.
***Miss Cassi says that Harry is not gay. She says maybe Ron's jealos of him, though, as he is supposedly going out with his "buddy".***
I'm not gay!
***Miss Cassi says there, that settles it. You must be, as you just said you weren't.***
But I'm not! Okay, Harry isn't gay. But he still likes Moaning Myrtle!
***Miss Cassi says I never said any thing about Moaning Myrtle, just Draco. I don't think that Harry would want Draco, anyway, as Hermione would beat him up for taking him.***
Ah, yes. True. I didn't think of that, creepy diary voice! Thank you very much!
***Miss Cassi says you are welcome.***
Anyway, I think that Draco is starting to fall for Mione, which is good, because then I won't have to deal with her annoying gibberish on studing harder.
***Miss Cassi says yes, but then you won't have her to tell you that your paper was written wrong in Snapes Class.***
Oh, true. I better go break that relationship up!
Ron Weasly, Gryffindor Extrordinair
Hand written letter found in a treasure box-
Dear Diary,
Plans on twarting Hermione and Draco's relationship has failed. But then, Hermione did give me alot of orange juice, a cup cake, and some tuna, so I am going to be docile for the five or six seconds that I actually still have them.
*four seconds later*
Wow, that took less time than I thought they would. Yay! Thats a record! Any way, Herione seems to be happy with that over bearing, annoying, Slyterin, jack ass, stupid, blonde... I better stop before bad things come from yelling at him... Like Hermione slapping me across the face, for instance. Oh well. I suppose things could be worse. She could have a mad crush on me!
***Miss Cassi says like you do her?***
*Ears turn pink* No! I don't have a crush on Hermione!
***Miss Cassi says you know, it might be easier to scratch your head guiltily without your fingers crossed.***
...Okay, tired of talking to you. Anyway, I think that Draco is using Mione for something... Good grades for instance.
***Miss Cassi looks around innocently and says that sounds familiar.***
****J.K. Rowling says yes it does! J.K. Rowling writes that Ron will fall in love with Hermione and ask her out.***
Oooh... Hermione... I think...
***Miss Cassi says No! They must be interelated! Harry shall ask her out *first*.***
Oh no! Wonder boy is going to ask her out first! I better run and ask, or else I'll miss out!
Ron Weasly, Gryffindor Extrordinair
Hand written letter found in a treasure box-
Dear Diary,
No! Harry got there first, and she said no, then something about a bish, and then I asked her, and she ran away screaming something about how Goyle and Crabbe were more bishy...
***Miss Cassi says its okay, Ron. Your almost a bish, about as much as Harry.***
Thanks, I think.... Anyway, so now Hermione looks at us funny... And I don't know why. I don't think that I deserve being treated like that! I mean, all I did was ask her out!!
***Miss Cassi asks and what did you say to her when you asked her out?***
I said "Mione, you shouldn't go out with Malfoy because he is a git, but you should go out with me because I am sexy."
***Miss Cassi rolls her eyes and says well that explains it...***
Well, your so helpful, aren't you, miss priss! I don't like you!
***Miss Cassi says thats okay, I don't like you either. Your not a bish. And besides, you lack the evil or mischievious spirit that I like. So, sucks to be you, doesn't it?***
If your suggesting that my brothers... Not Fred and George.... They couldn't be...
***Miss Cassi says yes Ron, I like them more than you.***
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!
Ron Weasly, Gryffindor Extrordinair
Hand Written letter found in a treasure box-
Dear Diary,
Ah, well, Hermione has absolutely no thoughts what so ever of not going out with Draco. Wait, did that make sense? yes, it did. Okay. But only if I read it right..... Today, Harry asked my little sister out, and she said no. I can't understand why.... But after some small bribery on my part...
***Miss Cassi says bribery meaning holding her by the scruff of the neck and yelling go out with him or die.***
... I have convinced my baby sister to go out with him. There. That was easy! Also, I had to pee really bad after all that orange juice. Curses. Damn Hermione and her form of bribery...
***Miss Cassi says I had better not say any thing, as you are likely to explode and I would die of massive laugh attack.***
Me exploding... Now thats an idea.... Ack! Pigwideon just flew by and dropped a 'present' on my "diary"! You suck you stupid owl!
***Miss Cassi asks why don't you say that instead of writing it?***
That would make sense, wouldn't it...
***Miss Cassi says yes it would.***
I had better go clean up my stupid owls mess... I will have to write later....
Ron Weasly, Gryffindor Extrordinair
Okay, I have decided that I will put up a diary for each person who will have a diary, but If you have any other people that I should do a diary on, I will, provided that they suit me. I will *NEVER* do a diary for Pansy, Crab, Goyle, or Cho Chang, the first three because there too stupid, and Cho because I don't have any inkling as to what she would actually write in her diary that I could destort and destroy. But just about any one else.... If I don't want to do someone that you bring up, I will send a personal email telling you why I do not want to, so there will be no need to write it into this story. But anyway, that is my peace for this time. Ciao!
Hand written letter found in a treasure box-
Dear Diary,
I am to poor to buy a diary, but I have enough parchment that I can write and hide the letters. I don't get that. Why must I be the poor one! I am the pretty one! All the woman send me fan letters! I don't understand why they keep spelling my name wrong though.... They keep sending me letters that say 'Dear Legolas'.... they must have given me that name as a nick name. I can't understand all these fans... Yes, I know that I am devishly handsome, but my name is alright. I don't need a new one.
Mione is scaring me. She keeps asking Draco out, and I don't get why. She hated him for how many years, then up and decides that he is cute. I am the cute one! I am the sidekick, after all.
***Miss Cassi says you mean that annoying guy who stands by Harry's side and kicks him into shape?***
Yeah, thats it.
***Miss Cassi says I didn't know that Hermione offered her services as on of those...***
Hey, neither did I! Where did you hear that from???
***Miss Cassi slaps her head in frustration.***
Oh well. Hey, did I mention, you cheap form of a diary, that Moaning Myrtle likes Harry? I think he might like her too.... I can't imagine why.... I wouldn't want to kiss something that is going to make me freeze... But, if Harry wants to, I suppose that he could commit suicide and then share her u-bend. But that is all up to personal preference. As far as I'm conscerned if he wants to be in a toilet, then I could just give him a swirly. But, he says that he doesn't have a crush on her. Then, he also said that he didn't want to go to Hogsmeade. Wait, does that mean he has a crush on Draco? Because Hermione said that he only didn't want her to go out with him because he wanted to go out with Draco.... And he said no.... Does that mean that he is... No, madness to suggest it. Gay??
Ron Weasly, Gryffindor Extrordinair
Hand written letter found in a treasure box-
Dear Diary,
I asked Harry if he had a crush on Draco, and I am now sure that my best friend is gay, as he said no. Wait, does that mean he has a crush on Hermione to??? Oh well. I took out his fire bolt today, and he kicked the shit out of me for it because he said that I was getting it dirty... He's the one getting that fine broom dirty, rubbing his grimy, gay hands all over it.
***Miss Cassi says that Harry is not gay. She says maybe Ron's jealos of him, though, as he is supposedly going out with his "buddy".***
I'm not gay!
***Miss Cassi says there, that settles it. You must be, as you just said you weren't.***
But I'm not! Okay, Harry isn't gay. But he still likes Moaning Myrtle!
***Miss Cassi says I never said any thing about Moaning Myrtle, just Draco. I don't think that Harry would want Draco, anyway, as Hermione would beat him up for taking him.***
Ah, yes. True. I didn't think of that, creepy diary voice! Thank you very much!
***Miss Cassi says you are welcome.***
Anyway, I think that Draco is starting to fall for Mione, which is good, because then I won't have to deal with her annoying gibberish on studing harder.
***Miss Cassi says yes, but then you won't have her to tell you that your paper was written wrong in Snapes Class.***
Oh, true. I better go break that relationship up!
Ron Weasly, Gryffindor Extrordinair
Hand written letter found in a treasure box-
Dear Diary,
Plans on twarting Hermione and Draco's relationship has failed. But then, Hermione did give me alot of orange juice, a cup cake, and some tuna, so I am going to be docile for the five or six seconds that I actually still have them.
*four seconds later*
Wow, that took less time than I thought they would. Yay! Thats a record! Any way, Herione seems to be happy with that over bearing, annoying, Slyterin, jack ass, stupid, blonde... I better stop before bad things come from yelling at him... Like Hermione slapping me across the face, for instance. Oh well. I suppose things could be worse. She could have a mad crush on me!
***Miss Cassi says like you do her?***
*Ears turn pink* No! I don't have a crush on Hermione!
***Miss Cassi says you know, it might be easier to scratch your head guiltily without your fingers crossed.***
...Okay, tired of talking to you. Anyway, I think that Draco is using Mione for something... Good grades for instance.
***Miss Cassi looks around innocently and says that sounds familiar.***
****J.K. Rowling says yes it does! J.K. Rowling writes that Ron will fall in love with Hermione and ask her out.***
Oooh... Hermione... I think...
***Miss Cassi says No! They must be interelated! Harry shall ask her out *first*.***
Oh no! Wonder boy is going to ask her out first! I better run and ask, or else I'll miss out!
Ron Weasly, Gryffindor Extrordinair
Hand written letter found in a treasure box-
Dear Diary,
No! Harry got there first, and she said no, then something about a bish, and then I asked her, and she ran away screaming something about how Goyle and Crabbe were more bishy...
***Miss Cassi says its okay, Ron. Your almost a bish, about as much as Harry.***
Thanks, I think.... Anyway, so now Hermione looks at us funny... And I don't know why. I don't think that I deserve being treated like that! I mean, all I did was ask her out!!
***Miss Cassi asks and what did you say to her when you asked her out?***
I said "Mione, you shouldn't go out with Malfoy because he is a git, but you should go out with me because I am sexy."
***Miss Cassi rolls her eyes and says well that explains it...***
Well, your so helpful, aren't you, miss priss! I don't like you!
***Miss Cassi says thats okay, I don't like you either. Your not a bish. And besides, you lack the evil or mischievious spirit that I like. So, sucks to be you, doesn't it?***
If your suggesting that my brothers... Not Fred and George.... They couldn't be...
***Miss Cassi says yes Ron, I like them more than you.***
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!
Ron Weasly, Gryffindor Extrordinair
Hand Written letter found in a treasure box-
Dear Diary,
Ah, well, Hermione has absolutely no thoughts what so ever of not going out with Draco. Wait, did that make sense? yes, it did. Okay. But only if I read it right..... Today, Harry asked my little sister out, and she said no. I can't understand why.... But after some small bribery on my part...
***Miss Cassi says bribery meaning holding her by the scruff of the neck and yelling go out with him or die.***
... I have convinced my baby sister to go out with him. There. That was easy! Also, I had to pee really bad after all that orange juice. Curses. Damn Hermione and her form of bribery...
***Miss Cassi says I had better not say any thing, as you are likely to explode and I would die of massive laugh attack.***
Me exploding... Now thats an idea.... Ack! Pigwideon just flew by and dropped a 'present' on my "diary"! You suck you stupid owl!
***Miss Cassi asks why don't you say that instead of writing it?***
That would make sense, wouldn't it...
***Miss Cassi says yes it would.***
I had better go clean up my stupid owls mess... I will have to write later....
Ron Weasly, Gryffindor Extrordinair