Chapter 9
Ginny stuck her fork in her ham and twisted it around.
"Don't mutilate it Ginny. Ham is for eating, not self destructing." Ron looked at Ginny, quietly trying to joke.
Ginny shot him a look that made him go back to his own food.
She wasn't in the mood for this. She didn't even want to go to her classes today. What was the point? Everyone was going to treat her differently once they found out about her father.
She didn't want to be treated any differently. Her father was missing. There was nothing she could do about it. She wasn't going to think about it, she wasn't going to waste her time on a problem she couldn't fix. She wasn't going to be the girl who needed a shoulder to lean on, and she wasn't going to be the girl everyone pitied. No. Now, she was going to be Ginny.
"Hermione, I'm going to need your help, studying for my finals. Do you think you could help me with everything? I feel so hard behind, and I want to catch up before Christmas." Ginny smiled at Hermione, who simply nodded.
Everyone was quiet at the table, and Ginny was getting really sick of it.
"You know, we don't have to be this way. So what? Our father's missing. I'm sure in the end everything's going to work out. Why ponder on it? We shouldn't act supper depressed." Ginny rolled her eyes, and finished eating her breakfast.
She ignored the look of disgust Ron gave her.
"Gin, he's our dad. He's missing! We should at least feel a little afraid." Ron was on the verge of yelling at Ginny.
"We shouldn't ponder on it. It will only make things worse." Ginny said, defiantly to Ron.
"No, we should at least show some respect! How would dad feel if you had gone missing? Anything could happen to him! Don't tell me you're at least a little afraid?" Ron's face was now turning purple, and he was scaring Ginny, but she continued on.
"NO! Ron, I'm finished being afraid! What's going to happen is going to happen! And there's nothing we can do about it! I'm not going to sit here, and waste my time praying, crying, screaming, that dad is going to be okay. He most likely wont be. Face it! All we can do is hope. And that's all I'm going to do." Ginny was furious, and afraid at the same time. Harry and Hermione were both quiet, but Ron was ferocious.
"You have no respect at all Ginny! You make it sound like you want dad to die! Get out of my sight." Ron yelled at Ginny.
"DON'T TELL ME I HAVE NO RESPECT." Ginny screamed, jumping up from the table, causing every head in the Great Hall to turn towards her.
"YOU DON'T HAVE ANY ANYWAYS. THE SECOND I SEE YOU CRY BECAUSE YOUR FATHER IS GONE, THEN I'LL KNOW YOU HAVE SOME DECANCY." Ron yelled standing up from the table too.
"Go on and scream, yell at me! I'm so far away right now; it doesn't matter. You wont ever understand! Look at you! You're telling me to cry because my father is missing. You can't control my life Ron. I have far more respect and understanding than you ever will. Don't tell me that everything's going to be okay, and that you understand what's going on! I know you don't know what's going on, and you can never understand. I can't take this anymore." With that quiet statement, Ginny walked up to her dormitory, causing Hermione to get up and follow her.
Ginny ran up the stairs, bursting with so many emotions she thought she was going to explode. There was only one thing Ginny could do. She ran to her room, and grabbed her trunk, pulling out everything that was in her way. She finally found her journal, and angrily flipped through it's rather stupid love poems, and silly entries she had written. This time she was going to be serious. She grabbed her quill, and started writing everything that came to her mind. She ended up with two poems
Take a black and white picture of the worldSo the earth stands still
And you realize what you've done
See it for what it is
Whether good or bad, you've spoiled the fun
For you, life won't move on
Condemned to life
A prisoner in its path
Can you feel the heat?
Do you see the wrath?
The pictures do not tell a lie
The people do not pass
Forsaken
Taken
Gone are the souls
That lie in the pictures
With truths still untold
And stories yet to unfold
The eyes stare
And the faces are blank
You wonder by without a care
As life stands still
No one feels your sorrow
No one's found your hope
You're left behind
Not ready to face tomorrow.
~*~
I'm so far away right now
That it might be hard to come back to reality
I'm so drifted away right now
That it's not hard to get lost
The vines that close around me are tightly closing in
The thorns are cutting into my skin
The sun shoots rays down
To burn up my skin
The rose that I hold
Quickly turns to ash, and then
All I've got left are the thorns
More blood to add to the story
More pain to add to the glory
More suffering to hide deep down inside
More feathers to help me lift and fly
I'm so far away right now
Life just seems to be words that have no meaning
Like a butterfly
But somebody's taken away its wings
Just an ugly figment of someone's imagination
I've run so far away right now
I've forgotten which road leads to home
I've forgotten what it's like to breathe, to see, to live
I'm so far away right now
That it might be hard to come back to reality.
Ginny snapped her book shut and threw it at the wall, now frustrated that she promised herself she wouldn't cry anymore.
She jumped when Hermione walked into her room to pick up the book.
Hermione sat on Ginny's bed and looked at Ginny, her eyes filled with sympathy.
"You know Ginny, you can't keep things like this bottled up inside you. It doesn't work that way." Hermione said quietly while staring at the floor.
"Please Hermione. Don't tell me right now, what I should and shouldn't do. I can't really take any crap right now." Ginny tried to smile.
"Gin, hun, I'm worried. This can't be good. If, you-know-who is loose, then, doesn't that mean we're in danger?" Hermione now looked nervous.
"Herm, we've been in danger all along. It's just now; danger's come to knock on our own front door. Don't worry. For now the door's locked." Ginny sighed, knowing that Hermione wouldn't understand. She barely understood herself.
Ginny shivered, and then smiled.
"Come on Miny, let's get to class." And with that she got up, and linked arms with Hermione, and they both walked back to their classes
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Ginny laughed. It had been three months since Ginny had received the news of her father. Everyone had eventually calmed down, and things were as normal as they would be.
Ron had just told a funny joke. Everyone was outside, on Hogwarts grounds of course.
The rules were different now. No one was allowed of the campus, and no one could go anywhere for Christmas break. But, being trapped at Hogwarts wasn't as bad as it sounded.
Malfoy hadn't acted any differently towards Ginny since that night; it was as if it had never happened. So, Ginny decided that if he wasn't going to act any different, than neither was she.
Ginny decided she wanted to be by herself for a while, so she went to go sit down by a tree, not far from the entrance of the castle. She opened up her sketchbook, and began drawing the castle. (It was a Saturday, and she had nothing better to do.)
Just then, Malfoy came, and sat down besides Ginny, much to her annoyance.
"You know, I've been thinking, why don't we just call off this whole, `boyfriend girlfriend' thing, since you can't send a letter to your father to tell him about it anyways." Ginny said without looking up from her sketch.
"Well we could, but what about your reputation?" Malfoy said, obviously trying to make Ginny mad, like he always did.
"I thought you would realize by now that I don't care about my reputation." Ginny said calmly much to Malfoy's disappointment.
"You know you don't want to end it." Malfoy said, trying again.
That made Ginny look up from her drawing, and raise her eyebrows.
"You're very funny when you want to be ferret. I think you're the one who wants to continue this stupid thing we've got going." Ginny said sarcastically.
"You know I never would want that." Malfoy said, trying to be serious.
"Do I?" Ginny said, smiling, glad that for once she was making Malfoy mad.
"I really don't care. Just warn me when you want to break it off, so I can dump you, and I won't look like an idiot." Malfoy said, his smirk now back on his face.
"Typical." Ginny said, now going back to her drawing.
"Now, you know that the Yule Ball is coming up. We're going together right?" Malfoy now looked bored.
"I guess." Ginny felt awkward.
"Good. You're going to need new dress robes though. I'm not going to a ball with a girl who wears frilly hand-me-downs." Malfoy smirked again, and Ginny only smiled.
"I guess you can buy them for me then." Ginny giggled, she got him.
"Fine, I will. I'm leaving now. You're giving me a headache." Malfoy got up to leave.
"Just so you know, I'm not like you're other `girlfriends'. I don't let guys get all over me, and then have them dump me. So if that's what you're after, get over it." Ginny didn't look up from her drawing, knowing that Malfoy was smiling.
"Don't worry Weasel. God, you worry so much. Like I would want to be all over you." Malfoy said sarcastically.
He turned around to leave, still talking.
"But you know, you may be like those other 'girlfriends' once I'm finished with you." Malfoy said, rather loudly so Ginny would hear.
Ginny rolled her eyes.
"Pervert."
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@uthors note: Finished…. *whipes forehead* I'm tired, hungry, and thirsty. But I'm done, so I hope u like it. Review and tell me!! Thanks to all my wonderful reviewers… you guys keep me writing!
Oh, here's a preview of what's to come
I'm thinking about writing a scene where Malfoy gets drunk..and… I don't want to give it away….but oh the possibilities!! What fun to write…. I can't wait!
Please review…. I'll see you guys later………. Bye!
p.s.- and yah, those are my poems… (disclaimer)… whatever… I wrote them
~:Firepixie0071:~