Title: The Myth of Innocence
Author: Catalina Royce
Disclaimer: These stories are based on characters and situations created
and owned by JK Rowling, various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books,
Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made
and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.
Rating: R
There is no pain so great as the memory of joy in present grief.
Aeschylus
Ginny awoke to the sound of screeching. Her mother had just come up the stairs to find out that she was still asleep, "And on the 1st of September, too". She left muttering about foolish girls and their annoying brothers – testimony that, despite the fact that Fred and George were fully able to support themselves, they continued to try their wares out on their 'poor defenseless mother'.
She didn't have time for a shower – a fact that greatly upset her, so Ginny changed into her clothes, slipping her robes over the top. She might belong to the Weasley's, but pride prevented her from showing how badly off they were. And it wasn't as if they were going to die of hunger anytime soon. It was just that they weren't as well off as some might be.
Ginny stacked up her textbooks, checking that she had everything. 'The Standard Book of Spells (Grade 6), A History of Magic, Magical Theory, Advanced Transfiguration, One Thousand Magical Herbs and Fungi, Magical Drafts and Potions...' yes, everything was there. This year was going to be good; she knew it. Besides, maybe Ron Harry and Hermione will accept me this year...Ginny thought excitedly.
Oh please, an acid voice replied in her mind. Why would you want to hang around with them? Harry's never going to want you. He's too wrapped up in that mudblood of his-- Hermione.
That's not a nice thing to say, Ginny argued silently. Hermione's my best friend and they're just good pals.
The voice disagreed with a saccharine sweet tone. That's what you think.
Well, someone got up on the wrong side of the bed today.
I got up on the same side as you, the voice replied dryly. Ginny grinned and laughed, neatly packing her clothes in the trunk. She ran her hand through her hair, unconsciously trying to tame the red mass as she surveyed her belongings. The trunk was old and battered. It was a hand-me-down from George, who in turn had gotten it from Bill. When they'd left school, they'd passed it down, which had infuriated Virginia, and mildly irritated Ginny. She never got anything new.
Ginny sighed and started lugging the trunk down to the front door, wishing her room wasn't on the stairs. Molly, Ginny's mother, called up to her. 'Ginny, we're ready to go! Hurry up!' Molly turned and left, muttering, 'That girl has no sense of time.'
Virginia's acid tongue let itself be known. 'And that girl has no idea about keeping her legs shut, or at the very least using contraceptives.' Thankfully, though, Molly was out of earshot. Ginny breathed a sigh of relief. Stopping Virginia from taking control of her body was getting harder. 'You should really try to control yourself,' she murmured to Virginia. 'She is our mother.'
She didn't give birth to me.
'You never told me who did.'
It was you.
'Who's the father?' She joked to cover her discomfort.
You aren't ready for that yet.
Shrugging off her thoughts, Ginny finished her chore and clambered into the Weasley's car, glad to be going back to Hogwarts for another year. 'Gee, Gin, you took long enough' Ron said, grinning as she shot him a glare worthy of Percy. It didn't disturb him, though. Ron merely shut up and turned to the window.
The trip was uneventful, but for the occasional first year, wanting to know who was in her compartment. They lost interest when they realized she was the only occupant.
As the horseless -- or rather, Thestral pulled -- carriages took her, again alone, to the castle, Ginny wondered if anyone would care if she left, or let Virginia take over. Being alone was, well..lonely. She had spent a brief period of time with Ron, Harry and Hermione, but it had ended rather abruptly at the end of her fifth year.
Entering the castle, she saw Professor McGonagall and Professor Snape standing on the stairs, eagle eyes obviously looking for someone. However, this crush would probably prevent even them from finding their prey, whoever they were. Ginny paused as McGonagall locked eyes with her, and silently called her over. Ginny winced as she walked towards the two – both Professors intimidated her.
Ginny halted in front of them, nodding at Snape's smirk. Funnily enough, Snape was the only teacher Virginia respected, accepted, and even liked. Ginny hated both him and his class. In a rare show of compromise, Virginia behaved herself if she could take control during Potions. 'Yes, Professor?' Ginny addressed McGonagall quietly, trying not to let her voice tremble.
'Miss Weasley, Professor Snape has talked to me about your potions class.'
'Did I do something wrong?'
'No, in fact, you did something very right. You have excelled in Potions, far further than sixth year. It has been suggested that you advance to Seventh Year Potions.' Ginny's eyes bugged. She didn't think Virginia was that good. 'However,' McGonagall went on, 'it will require certain...sacrifices. For instance, your timetable will need adjustments. For obvious reasons, the same classes don't occur at the same time. If you drop Divination, you can fit in your Potions and have a study period, which you will need. The work is much harder, as the seventh years are studying for N.E.W.T.s, or rather, will be as soon as classes commence.'
'What Professor McGonagall is trying to say is that if you accept, it will be a harrowing year,' Snape interjected dryly. 'Sleep will be a commodity, but, you will be taught things most students could only dream of.'
Ginny hesitated. She'd always dreamt about being noticed by people. Growing up had been hard – with 6 successful brothers, she'd been forgotten on regular occasions. But in her first year – and in the 6 months after that – she'd discovered there were two types of attention. Good attention – when you've done something to be proud of, and bad attention. Instinct told her that if she accepted, she'd receive bad attention. But perhaps, just perhaps, she could manipulate the attention to be good, like Brietta, and Luna – girls in her year. 'Can I please think it over. For just a while?'
Snape looked as though he'd swallowed a lemon, so unexpected was her indecision. 'Very well.'
Ginny breathed a sigh of relief that she hadn't offended the professor. Even greater was her achievement of coming out alive. Quite simply, she was scared of most Hogwarts professors. They seemed to be rather able to frighten students out of their wits. Even Professor Flitwick was nasty when riled.
The entire exchange had taken ten minutes; the first years weren't even there yet. "Go and participate in the Feast." McGonagall ordered. Ginny nodded and left, seating herself beside Ron. Virginia silently cursed as Neville sat on her other side and immediately started leaning over her to talk to Ron. Just then, the first years filed in, and the hat started its song, much to Ginny's delight. She reveled in singing. The sounds and sights were brilliant. However, she couldn't sing a note.
And place me on your head.
I will shuffle through your mind,
Until your head's well read.
My job's to tell where you belong
I'm a sorting hat, you see
And once I've finished, I shall put
You where you need to be.
You may be brave – courageous,
You may be brash and bold
If that's legit, then you'll fit
The noble Gryffindor mold.
Maybe you are loyal,
And maybe you are just.
If that is true, then for you,
Hufflepuff's a must.
But then you might be clever,
And intellect's your game.
And if so, then I know,
Ravenclaw's the name.
Lastly there's the devious
The ambitious and the sly.
If this is you, I know what to do
And Slytherin I'll cry.
So try me on and be surprised
I'm full of good ideas
I'll see your mind, and then I'll find,
The house that gets your cheers!
The houses cheered, smiling and laughing, as the sorting ceremony began. "Asquith, Jake," was sorted into Hufflepuff. Ginny sat and smiled, wondering what life in that house would be like. "Bruswyn, Kayri," was sent to Slytherin. Wincing, Ginny tried not to concentrate on the voice in her mind – the memories of the hat telling her where she should be placed.
'Hmm...wonderful mind, I see...'
"Einarhla, Therese."
'Not a lot of loyalty.'
"RAVENCLAW!"
'Not Hufflepuff, you say? Sort of prejudiced, aren't you?'
"Ilkla, Paul"
'Oh? You want to go to Gryffindor? You're very capable of Slytherin. It almost seems as if it's running through your veins. But, I suppose, I'll have to accede to your wishes...'
"GRYFFINDOR!"
Ginny was startled out of her reverie by the hat's cry, and the subsequent cheering of her house. The boy sat down next to Neville, and Ginny leaned around Neville to smile at him. He grinned at her, nerves showing on his face. Neville turned to Paul, then, and all was lost as Ginny once again was forgotten.
Thoughts swirled around in her brain. What if she wasn't supposed to be here? What if God was punishing her for something? What if there were half-squibs, people who were wizards but who shouldn't be, and she was one of them? Perhaps one day she could become a better witch. But wait...
Something was nagging at her brain, begging her to remember. Earlier that day, what had she done? Home, train, Hogwarts, McGonagall...Snape! She was a better witch. She could go up in Potions. Perhaps she could prove to God how good she was, that she wasn't taking her power for granted. Perhaps then he'd let her succeed in other areas of witchcraft...
"Veraugur, Alaina." She, too, was sent to Slytherin amidst cheers and hissing. Ginny stayed silent, ignoring the rest of the feast.
Classes began the next day, starting with Arithmancy, then Transfiguration. They passed quickly for Ginny. She was happy here. Learning. Besides, she had to tell McGonagall that she was accepting Snape's offer. She didn't know when during the night that she'd decided, but somehow the decision was made. "Now," asked McGonagall during her lesson. "Does anyone know the animagus potion? No one?" She looked a little disappointed.
Oh, for fuck's sake, Virginia complained as Ginny racked her memory. There are three. The first, Manus, is used in preparation. Natalius is the second, and must be taken during the new moon. The third must be taken after transformation, otherwise, the next time you transform, your magic will be confused and you'll get stuck between two animals. The potion is called Liturae.
"Miss Weasley?" McGonagall queried. "Do you know?"
Ginny, not wanting to be a show off, replied, "No, professor."
McGonagall shot her a look that obviously said, "Maybe Snape was wrong about you." Virginia screamed her fury at Ginny's reluctance. I gave you the answer, all the information, and what do you say? 'I don't know miss. I'm a little shoe licker, Miss, who likes to fawn over Pin dick Potter.' She mimicked with cruel accuracy.
Ginny started to rebuff that with great dignity. However, if she'd learnt anything – despite the fact that Virginia had a temper – it was that dignity never worked with Virginia. That's not true, I –
Just prefer not to show your true colours. I'm sick of this, Virginia butted in.
Fine, Ginny replied, at the same time McGonagall let the class out. Ginny stayed behind, waiting nervously for McGonagall to speak.
"What is it, Miss Weasley?"
"Well," Ginny swallowed once, her courage deserting her. "I wanted to let you know I'm planning on accepting Professor Snape's offer."
The professor simply raised her eyebrow, and handed Ginny's new timetable to her. "If you have any trouble or problems, or feel the need to move back to 6th Year Potions, contact me and I'll have things sorted out."
Ginny nodded once and started down the hall, all the while speaking to the other person inside her head. You know, Virginia, instead of hurting each other trying to gain control, I think it might be possible to...to co-operate. I want to be seen. You want to be powerful. Do you think we might try?
There was silence for a second as Virginia mulled it over. We might try. Was her only answer. Ginny expected no more. For a second, Ginny leant against a wall, letting Virginia take some control, and keeping some of herself. For a while, Ginny was disorientated, feeling like she was going to be sick. But then she realized that she was no longer fighting to survive in her brain, and instead swallowed the rising bile in her throat and started walking.
The change in Ginny could be seen in her demeanor. Whereas Ginny was pushed to the walls, hunched and cowering, Virginia operated in the full current of the school halls, straight, proud, and giving as good as she got...which caused a few strange looks. The two of them together, however, made Ginny feel like a normal person for once. Of course, she was taking steps for two people, and it was hard to co-ordinate, but none-the-less, she was happy.
She walked quickly, oblivious to others. However, despite her hurrying, she was late. Damned...Lucky... came the two thoughts. Ginny paused, as one did when two people spoke at the same time, then voiced her thought. Lucky McGonagall sent a note with us. Virginia said nothing.
The class, including the Dream Team, looked up as the door creaked open. The Gryffindor's eyes widened, the Slytherins just looked amused. This mousy haired girl, one they'd all forgotten, had suddenly burst into Potions. Added to that was the fact that she seemed to be rather dazed and almost dizzy, as if fevered.
"Miss Weasley," Snape drawled. "Nice of you to join us."
She smirked, giving a remarkable impression of Draco Malfoy. "I wouldn't miss it for the world, Sir," she gave the word 'Sir" a nasty inflection. "It took me a while to decide." Ginny was shocked at the camaraderie she could feel when Virginia was speaking to Snape, the respect and admiration of one master towards another, and she finally understood some things about Virginia – things it had taken her 4 and a half years to learn. The Gryffindors gaped, and the Slytherins smirked, thinking that perhaps Ginny had decided to get tutoring.
Snape just raised an eyebrow. "I had no doubt in my mind. I wonder where yours came from."
"My mind was playing tricks on me," she stated, quite truthfully. "Where should I be seated?" Snape pointed to the Slytherin side, curiosity flaring in his gaze. The backseat was empty of people. Potion ingredients covered almost every inch of the table, but for the end with the cauldron. Looking up, she noticed everyone was already working. Ginny was undecided for a while, but Virginia simply chose a mid-strength Silver cauldron, size 8. She whispered to Ginny in her mind. Don't worry about it. Snape and I have already discussed my lack of consideration for his teaching methods. We'll be fine. Ginny was left only to be thankful that, while they were separate entities, they were both human – in a matter of speaking – and they both felt exactly the same thing as humans. At the moment, Virginia was feeling compassionate.
Picking out some Gillyweed roots, Virginia recorded the amount, and dropped them in. Frowning in concentration, she repeated the process with an ever-growing list of ingredients.
As they neared the end of the lesson, Snape stalked up and down the corridor, and stopped at her table. "Miss Weasley, what, may I ask, are you making?"
"Well, if I've made it correctly," she replied, staring intently at the bright teal colour of the potion, "it's a new invisibility potion."
"Oh? Care to explain?"
"As you know, the two potions already available, Occaecerus and Caecumus, aren't effective, so this is what I've done. I took Gillyweed roots, which will bring in the liquefaction needed, and yet ignored in most invisibility spells. Then I added aconite, powdered snake fangs, bicorn horn and essence of belladonna. Finally, because the infusion is potently poisonous, and would instantly cause paralysation, I added bezoar, which nullifies all those ingredients, at the same time adding a factor to enhance the potion, so, instead of just making you transparent, but keeping your shape, it makes you completely invisible, much like an invisibility cloak would. I have, however, left out the Demiguise hair, because I'm allergic to it. This was also the reason I had to modify the potions."
Snape raised an eyebrow, ignoring the fidgeting students wanting to go out to lunch. "Why don't you try it?"
She nodded and calmly took a sip. The class gasped as, almost instantly, she disappeared. "Very good, Virginia. Now how are you going to reappear?" They heard a snort, and she popped back into view. Ginny was still feeling shock that when she'd looked down, she hadn't been able to see herself.
"Of course," Hermione whispered. "She added snake fangs, which gives a voluntary action. . ."
"Why?" asked Ron.
"No one's really been sure why, although they think it's something to do with the fact that snake fangs are retractable…" She trailed off as Snape shot her a glare.
"20 points from Gryffindor for talking in class, Miss Granger. Virginia, you'll be paired with someone until you know how this class operates…"
"Who?"
Snape's eyes searched the classroom, looking for someone suitable.
Translations
Manus – manus -us f. [hand]; 'manus dare' , [to surrender]; 'in manibus', [on hand, in preparation]; 'servus ad manum', [a secretary]; abl. 'manu', [by hand, artificially].
Natalius – natalis -e [relating to birth , natal]; m. as subst. [a birthday]; plur. [birth, origin].
Liturae – litura -ae f. [an erasure , correction; a passage erased; a blot].
Occaecerus – occaeco -are [to make blind , to blind, to darken; to conceal, make invisible, to make dull or numb].
Caecumus – caecus -a -um act. , [blind, not seeing; intellectually or morally blind; uncertain, objectless]; pass., [unseen, hidden, obscure, dark].