Damn! That take-over-the-world plot failed... Why did my giant, singing soft
toy sunflowers have to try to eat me! That's code for "I still don't own
Artemis Fowl or any of the characters in those books".
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- ----------------------
Cut to Nowhere
(Nic is standing in front of the cast from Artemis Fowl.)
Nic: Truth or dare?
Foaly: Who are you talking to?
Nic: You, Foaly! The first to talk is in! So, Foaly, truth or dare?
Foaly: What exactly happens if I lie?
Nic: Um... I send you back to your world.
Foaly: Really?! Truth!
Nic: Um... If you were forced to have a romance with someone by a mad axeman, who would it be?
Foaly: (Looks at Holly) Um... Commander Root?
Nic: Liar! You lied!
(Clicks fingers. Foaly disappears. The black background changes to show a pool of lava, which Foaly appears above. Since he's in mid air, he falls in.)
Foaly: Help!
Nic: Now that that's settled...
Root: You... You killed him!
Nic: I'm like god, remember? I'll bring him back to life later. This is just a punishment for lying.
Holly: Why don't you bring him back now?
Nic: I did. I just sent him to a parallel world that should remind him distinctly of hell. You know, just to frighten him? I'll un-singe him when I bring him back here.
Cut to Hell-like world
(Foaly appears.)
Foaly: Where...? What!? This looks like...
(A red man with a forked tail, bat wings and horns appears)
Red Man: Welcome to hell!
(Foaly faints.)
Red Man: That was easier than I thought...
Cut to Nowhere
(Foaly reappears, with the red man beside him.)
Nic: Thanks, Anti-Conscience!
Red Man: You're welcome!
(Red Man disappears in a puff of smoke.)
Nic: I wish He'd just wake up...
(Clicks fingers. Foaly wakes up. He looks around.)
Foaly: Where...? I'm not dead?
Nic: You were dead. I revived you and sent you to a hell-like world. Then when you fainted I brought you back here.
Foaly: But... The devil?
Nic: Oh, that... That was my anti-conscience. It killed my conscience. It's its fault that you're all here.
Foaly: (To himself) Why couldn't her conscience have killed her anti- conscience?
(Red Man re-appears.)
Red Man: Her conscience is a pacifist. Except when her teacher makes her sit in a paddock, waiting to here the bell for lunch.
(Red Man disappears)
Foaly: Why did it have to hear?
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- ----------------------
Cut to Nowhere
(Nic is standing in front of the cast from Artemis Fowl.)
Nic: Truth or dare?
Foaly: Who are you talking to?
Nic: You, Foaly! The first to talk is in! So, Foaly, truth or dare?
Foaly: What exactly happens if I lie?
Nic: Um... I send you back to your world.
Foaly: Really?! Truth!
Nic: Um... If you were forced to have a romance with someone by a mad axeman, who would it be?
Foaly: (Looks at Holly) Um... Commander Root?
Nic: Liar! You lied!
(Clicks fingers. Foaly disappears. The black background changes to show a pool of lava, which Foaly appears above. Since he's in mid air, he falls in.)
Foaly: Help!
Nic: Now that that's settled...
Root: You... You killed him!
Nic: I'm like god, remember? I'll bring him back to life later. This is just a punishment for lying.
Holly: Why don't you bring him back now?
Nic: I did. I just sent him to a parallel world that should remind him distinctly of hell. You know, just to frighten him? I'll un-singe him when I bring him back here.
Cut to Hell-like world
(Foaly appears.)
Foaly: Where...? What!? This looks like...
(A red man with a forked tail, bat wings and horns appears)
Red Man: Welcome to hell!
(Foaly faints.)
Red Man: That was easier than I thought...
Cut to Nowhere
(Foaly reappears, with the red man beside him.)
Nic: Thanks, Anti-Conscience!
Red Man: You're welcome!
(Red Man disappears in a puff of smoke.)
Nic: I wish He'd just wake up...
(Clicks fingers. Foaly wakes up. He looks around.)
Foaly: Where...? I'm not dead?
Nic: You were dead. I revived you and sent you to a hell-like world. Then when you fainted I brought you back here.
Foaly: But... The devil?
Nic: Oh, that... That was my anti-conscience. It killed my conscience. It's its fault that you're all here.
Foaly: (To himself) Why couldn't her conscience have killed her anti- conscience?
(Red Man re-appears.)
Red Man: Her conscience is a pacifist. Except when her teacher makes her sit in a paddock, waiting to here the bell for lunch.
(Red Man disappears)
Foaly: Why did it have to hear?