Disclaimer : own nothing but my own imagination. and a crayon. but you can't have that.
Dedicated to Angel of hate, Aliquis, demoniclittlegirl, and Kouryou Sanomi, my first reviewers. I hope I've been able to fix some of the things you mentioned
When Will woke up he was lying face-down on his bed, still wearing the same clothes from yesterday. The curtains were closed and the fire glowing faintly. He was embarrassed to wonder what the servants had thought of his dishevelled appearance when they came in. At least they'd let him sleep, which was a blessing. He hadn't slept properly in days, and it was starting to show. Dark smudges under his eyes marred his usually youthful face, and he looked weary and worn.
He felt better now, though, and as he passed his mirror to get to the washbasin he noticed it made a world of difference on his image. The circles under his eyes were fading, but he couldn't help being reminded of kohl makeup. A lack of sleep and grooming, too, had left his hair longer and chaotic. The thought that he was beginning to look like Jack Sparrow brought a smile to his face, though he wasn't sure why. He suddenly felt more awake.
Finished washing, he moved to throw open the heavy curtains and allow sunlight to spill into the room. It was already late morning, so he must have missed breakfast. This meant a trip to the kitchen to see what he could scavenge in the way of leftovers. Even though he was now a 'proper gentleman', engaged to the daughter of a governor, he never felt the need to answer to tradition. He'd practically been raised by the sword smith. For years, he'd cooked his own meals and there was something about working hard and being rewarded for your efforts that had always interested him.
Will dressed quickly, choosing a suit more correct for a gentleman. It was stifling in the morning heat of the Caribbean, but he decided he'd better get used to it, the sooner the better. He tied his hair loosely but neatly at the nape of his neck.
Leaving his room, he smiled and nodded to a servant in the hallway and headed down the main staircase. Pausing at the bottom, he thought he heard voices coming from one of the sitting rooms off the main entrance. One was definitely Elizabeth, and the other was ... a man? Curious, Will padded closer to the sitting room door, which was slightly open. He thought he recognized the man's voice now. Knocking quickly, he opened the door and stepped inside.
Elizabeth and Commodore Norrington were seated across from each other. Elizabeth was laughing prettily at some joke the mariner had told. Norrington looked pleased with himself, and focused on Elizabeth's face, barely noticing Will's arrival. Will's fiancée was quicker, however, and stood up to greet him with a light kiss on the cheek.
"You missed breakfast," she said with a small smile, and sat down again while Will turned to greet the Commodore.
"Ah ... yes, I apologize. I must have overslept." Will replied, a tinge of colour rising to his cheeks.
It was hard to remember sometimes what was expected of him in this house, and the last thing he wanted to do was embarrass himself and his future wife by seeming socially inept.
"No matter, it won't happen again, I'm sure," Elizabeth said lightly, but with a hint of firmness in her voice. She smiled again, and Will took his place beside her on the sofa. Elizabeth cleared her throat. The Commodore seemed reluctant to start conversation, so she took decided to get polite society flowing again.
"I'm told you'll be joining us for supper tonight, Commodore ..." she started, looking expectantly at him. He raised his eyes to hers, relieved to be able to answer such a simple question.
"Yes - your father was kind enough to invite me." He glanced at Will.
"He also mentioned that I might speak with Mr. Turner here, and see if we can't start him learning the ropes of a sailor, since seamanship is necessary to round out the character of young gentlemen in a port like this."
Will thought he looked smug with the last comment, and had to bite back a remark about the fact that indeed, it was still a lowly blacksmith who was responsible for the rescue of the lovely lady. Instead, he simply nodded. Norrington stood up to make his goodbyes, promising to return to the house that evening. He picked up his coat and strode from the sitting room, leaving Will and Elizabeth to themselves.
"You look lovely today," Will commented, with a warm look at Elizabeth.
She seemed to hesitate for just a moment before she smiled in return, but Will caught the sadness that flashed across her features.
"What's wrong?" he asked. "Was there some problem with the Commodore ... ?"
"Oh! No, no, there's nothing. Really." She insisted, seeing the concern on his face. "I was just thinking about what to wear tonight."
Will didn't believe that, of course, but chose to ignore it. He wondered about the conversation the two had been having before he came downstairs, and considered asking Elizabeth to fill him in, but decided it wasn't his place. Eventually, she'd tell him what was bothering her. She wasn't one to hide her opinions, after all. They left the conversation at this, and Will headed out into the street to sort through his thoughts and take a walk. His feet knew the path well enough by now that he didn't really have to pay attention to where he was going.
He realized how reluctant he was to learn sailing with the Commodore and his men. He knew they were very capable, but he didn't like the idea of so much tradition and etiquette getting in the way of actual sailing. He'd probably have to salute every other person on the ship, and take orders from them too. Not to mention the outright arrogance some of them expressed, which Will wasn't sure he could handle. Now, on a pirate ship ...
Will shook his head. There he was, thinking about damn pirates again. Ever since Jack had sailed away without so much as a backward glance, it was all he could do not to jump on the next merchant ship and simply leave Port Royal.
He knew he had responsibilities here, to Elizabeth most of all, but the sea was ... well, it was in his blood now, as more than one pirate had told him. It was true, too. The scar on his left palm was testament to that. He'd risked his life on the water, and threatened the lives of others. He understood, after his time with Jack Sparrow, that the sea was a constant, so faithful that it was easier to love than any person. Jack had been betrayed by his own first mate, which must have been a terrible blow to his sense of trust. He'd managed to trust Will, but even Will had left him with Barbossa and the mutinous crew when he thought Jack would hurt Elizabeth.
Will was embarrassed by that, even now. He'd let Jack down, and it hurt him more than he cared to think about. After all this, though, Jack had finally gotten his ship back. The Black Pearl had waited for his return as rightful captain, as had the sea. Perhaps that's why Jack always seemed more stable, both in mind and in body, when he was out on open water. His swaying seemed almost elegant, and more purposeful when he had ambled around the deck of the Interceptor. Will had thought only women could move like that, but watching Jack was hypnotic, like a snake about to strike.
Will snapped out of his daydreaming when a load of garbage was tossed from a window high above him, just barely missing him. He glanced around, and realized he'd wandered down to the harbour, near the spot where he and Jack had stolen the canoe and made for the Dauntless, in one of their more brilliant (or was it stupid?) acts of piracy.
He turned around and started making his way back up the path he'd come. It was closer to dinnertime now, so he'd find out if anything needed to be done to prepare that he could help with. He'd have to get changed, too. His fine gentleman's clothes were dusty now, and smelled a lot like dead fish. Will reminded himself after one whiff of his sleeve that next time he went walking, he'd get changed first.
Dinner wasn't large, but it was very elegant. All the best silverware and dinner sets had been brought out, and the chef was ordered to spare no expense at preparing an elaborate meal for the guests. Governor Swann was at the head of the table, with Will at his right and Elizabeth at his left. Commodore Norrington had been seated beside Elizabeth, and the rest of the table was occupied by various other military personnel, no doubt all parts of Will's intended education.
During a lull in the conversation, Will's mind started to wander. He was amazed by the medals worn by some of the military sailors, and wondered what their duties were. At that level, would they even go out to sea anymore? Or would they just sit in an office and be figureheads, too valuable to put in any danger? Will refused to think that that could happen to him. He swore to himself that it wouldn't. He couldn't be so ... so useless. What good is twenty years worth of experience when it's collecting dust on a shelf?
He'd rather sail off with Jack and be a pirate than be cast away like that.
Will stopped for a moment as he realized what he'd just told himself. He wanted to sail off with Jack and be a pirate. Not to escape from Norrington. He felt it was what was right. Just the thought of it made his heart beat a little faster. He knew, though, that it would be nearly impossible. Even if he could find the Black Pearl and its captain, it wasn't likely that Jack would let him join the crew. Will had, after all, left him to the mercy of Barbossa, and maybe Jack thought that Will saving his life was just making amends. They were even, no favours owed. That must be why Jack had sailed away without hesitation, without looking up or giving any indication of waiting for Will. That meant ...
"Oh God ... I'm never going to see him again." This was whispered aloud, and Will flushed when he realized someone might have heard him. Glancing around, everyone seemed to be more or less occupied by their own conversations, but he saw Elizabeth give him a strange look before turning back to Commodore Norrington.
"Commodore," she asked, loud enough for the rest of the table to hear, "I wonder, have you had any luck locating the Black Pearl or its crew yet?"
Will turned his focus to Norrington, trying not to appear too eager to hear the reply. "In fact, Miss Swann, I can happily report that we are closer than before. With a little bit of creative investigation -" ( "Bribery, more like it," thought Will. ) "- we've been able to ascertain that the Black Pearl will be stopping in Tortuga sometime in the near future to restock and sell its pilfered bounty. I've already arranged for members of the marines to meet it when it arrives and arrest Jack Sparrow on sight."
"Captain Jack Sparrow," Will muttered under his breath.
He was interested to hear this news, though. Now that he had an idea where to find the Black Pearl, maybe he could make his way to Tortuga and find out whether or not Jack would have him. There would be a lot to sort out, though, what with the upcoming wedding day. And oh, the inappropriateness of it all, as the governor would inevitably think. As for Elizabeth ... would she even allow him to go? She couldn't stop him, not if it was really what he wanted, but he couldn't bear the thought of just leaving her like that.
The rest of the meal went by quickly, Will lost in his own thoughts about how to get to Tortuga and whether or not it would even be worth the trouble. He decided, though, that if he could get to the Black Pearl and be accepted by its captain once more, it would be worth any trouble.
As Elizabeth was getting ready for bed, she heard a light knock on her door. She looked up from the mirror, and, recognizing the knock, called out quietly. "It's open."
Will moved into the room and shut the door quietly behind him. "There's something I've been meaning to speak with you about. I'm sorry about the lateness, but it really can't wait ..."
Elizabeth motioned him to stand behind her at the dresser. When he approached, she held out her brush, and he took it. As he started to talk, he began brushing her hair for her.
"I've been thinking about what Commodore Norrington mentioned, about learning how to handle myself and a ship on the water. I must admit I think it's an excellent idea ..."
"But?"
"But ... I'd much rather learn from someone I already knew and was comfortable with. The Commodore is an excellent mariner, but he and I have never gotten along all that well ... I'm afraid it would reflect poorly on my abilities to perform the duties required of me."
Elizabeth paused at this. She considered for a moment, then met his eyes in the reflection in the mirror and asked simply, "What you mean is that you'd rather learn from Jack Sparrow."
Will looked away, but continued brushing her hair. His gaze roamed over the various things in the room; the stately furniture, the large windows with an excellent view, and the bed, in which he had dreamed about consummating his marriage with the woman he once thought his soulmate. He returned his attention to her, and answered finally.
"Yes."
Elizabeth sighed, and folded her hands neatly on her lap. "I won't stop you from going, if it's my permission you're after. I wondered if ... if you'd develop wanderlust after our little adventures. I hoped you'd forget, move on, but obviously not. Go then. I won't hold it against you."
Will was startled by the frankness of her response. He wanted Elizabeth to know that he still loved her, that he wasn't doing this to escape her or the life they'd planned together. It was just something he had to do to maintain his sanity. "Elizabeth, I swear to you - I will love no other woman while I'm away. My heart remains yours, and I don't want to do anything to harm our happiness."
Elizabeth smiled faintly, then bit her lip as she held back tears. "I know, Will, that's not what I'm worried about. But I'm afraid ..." She rubbed on hand tiredly over her eyes. "I'm afraid I can't make that same promise."
Will made a motion as if to say something, but she cut him off.
"I love you Will, and I know you love me. But I will never forget what my father's wandering did to my mother. It wasn't infidelity that worried her, but the idea that, at any minute, she could get a letter from a far corner of the world telling her he was lost at sea. The stress was too much for her. With the Commodore you'd be safer, you'd stay much closer, but with Jack Sparrow, you'd ... you'd be a pirate, Will! You'd be hated! Hunted! I just don't know if I can face that." A tear rolled down her cheek.
Will took a step back, the forgotten hairbrush falling to the ground. "Are you saying you won't wait for me?"
Elizabeth turned in her seat so she could face him. "No. All I'm saying is that I can't make any promises. I may be here when you return, I may not. I just need for you to understand that before you go. Please, Will, don't let me hold you back."
Will felt tears in his eyes. The woman who should be the love of his life, his own fiancée wouldn't promise to stay faithful to him in his absence. Feeling like part of his world was crumbling, he steeled himself and pick up the hairbrush from the floor. He leaned past her and placed it on the dresser. He turned to leave, but stopped at the door, and managed to choke out an emotional "Thank-you."
This was it, then. Although the pain of Elizabeth's admission still stung, he knew the decision had been made for him. He undressed quickly and slid into his cold bed. Sleep was a long way away, though, because the only think he could think of was the fact that, with luck, he'd be among the crew of the Black Pearl inside of a fortnight.