Disclaimer: We don't own any of it and don't claim to, please don't sue,
blah blah blah you get the idea.
Ch 1. The Journey Begins.
'And this is where the royal prince of Midget first got a wedgie, he was a midget you know, and this is where queen Barbara of self-pity hanged herself, Drama queen if you ask me.'
Claire couldn't contain herself any longer, she broke down into hysterics, grasping her sides in pain and trying not to wet herself with laughter.
Sara had done her best to keep a straight face for most of her mock tour, but within seconds she too had cracked up and was trying not to roll around on the floor in front of a bunch of total strangers.
After a few moments Claire wiped her eyes and straightened herself, just in time for a sneering comment from a very snobby old lady that seemed to think their behaviour, 'inappropriate'. Sara sighed and they began to descend a windy staircase into one of Ludlow Castles dungeons. 'Did you see the look on their faces?' Claire giggled as they discussed the local population of boring old people.
'Okay, okay, seriously, this is the dungeon.' Sara held up her arms and gestured around the dark, damp room impressively. 'Where a bunch of dirty thieves were probably used as sex slaves!' The girls burst into another fit of wild hysterics and had to wait several minutes before either could speak again.
'Hey,' Claire gasped as she straightened up, 'Hey, what's that?' She pointed through an archway behind Sara to another in the next room. Sara looked over her shoulder and frowned.
'Strange...' She muttered. The girls entered the room and looked around. It was a large empty chamber with a large archway in the centre. A ragged red veil hung across the arch. Claire gasped and squealed loudly, causing Sara to jump.
'Oh my god! It's just like the archway in Order of the Phoenix!' she was hopping up and down insanely now. 'Just like the one Sirius falls through! Oh my god! It's identical! Maybe this is where J.K got the idea from?'
'I don't think so.' Sara said skeptically. 'This wasn't here before.'
'Oh yeah right. Very funny.' Claire smirked and moved closer to examine the arch.
'I'm serious! I've been round this stupid castle a million times and there has never been a room here before!' Sara almost stamped her foot in frustration. She knew she was right, but proof to the contrary stood 8 feet tall right in front of her.
'Ohhh, mystery!' Claire sniggered. She hesitated when she saw the worried expression on her friends face, she was pretty sure this wasn't Sara's type of humour. 'You serious?' She asked slowly. Sara nodded. Claire frowned. She moved closer to the veil that was swaying serenely across the arch.
'No!' Sara shouted as she raised her hand to touch it. Claire jumped and looked at her friend in alarm. 'Are you mad?' Sara gasped. 'We've found an archway identical to the one that sucks Sirius into DEATH in the Harry Potter books; in a room that didn't even EXIST until today, and you wanna TOUCH it?' The girls stood in silence for a moment as Sara regained control of herself.
'Okay. Maybe you're sorta right.' Claire nodded slowly. 'But, just think of the possibilities, I mean, we don't know what's through here, we could walk through and come out Hogwarts, can you imagine that?' A manic glint appeared in Claire's eyes and for a moment her grin was mirrored on Sara's face. Sara looked at the veil and back at her friend; she bit her lip and considered the possibilities.
'But, Claire come on, none of that's real.' She frowned at her friend who gave her a pathetically disappointed look. 'Right?' She asked. The girls looked at each other for a moment before breaking out into twin evil grins.
'Can't hurt to look?' Claire suggested innocently.
'And no harm done if we're wrong.' Sara agreed.
The girls stood side by side and face the veil. They took a few deep breaths and grinned at each other. 'One...'
'Two...'
'THREE!' they screamed together and jumped forward.
*****
For a few moments it seemed they were suspended in space and time. They couldn't see, hear or feel anything. They a rushing sensation and a howling filled their ears. Lights sped past them and it felt like they were spinning wildly. Claire had a brief impression they were going to shoot out of the Stargate, but just as that idea began to take root the sensation stopped and they found themselves in a crumpled heap on a solid stone floor.
The girls moaned and groaned as they examined their bruises. Not taking any notice of the four figures stood over them. Slowly they adjusted their gaze to their surroundings and found themselves to be in the middle of a large hall surrounded by four...
'Elves!' Squealed Claire. Sara screamed. The elves jumped and three of them raised weapons and aimed directly at the girls' heads. The girls screamed loudly until the fourth Elf strode forward and gave them an order in Elvish. The weapons were lowered and the girls hesitantly got to their feet.
'Sara?'
'Yeah?'
'This isn't Hogwarts.'
'Yeah.'
'This is...'
'Yeah. And that's...'
'Yeah.'
Lord Elrond looked curiously at the two humans in front of him. He suspiciously eyed their unusual clothes and hair styles. 'Who are you?' He asked sternly. 'And what manor of magic allowed you to enter Imladris and appear before us?'
The girls looked wildly at each other and tried to stammer a hurried explanation of what had just happed. Elrond's eyes widened but when they were done he looked thoughtful. One of the other elves stepped forward and asked him something in Sindarin.
'What did he say?' Sara whispered in Claire's ear.
'Oh!' She exclaimed, and hurriedly pulled a book out of her shoulder bag. It was her Sindarin dictionary, and she never left home without it. After a few pages of frantic page flicking, she paused, 'uh-oh. I think he thinks we're spies of Sauron.'
'What? Well tell him we're not!'
'There is no need.' Lord Elrond interrupted, making them both jump. 'I do not believe that is so. Although, you're origin and purpose here is clouded. But I believe there is some reason yet to be discovered.'
The girls exchanged strange looks. When Lord Elrond told them they were to stay in Rivendell until the council, they were in a positive state of euphoria. When the elf maid leading them to their rooms told them they would be free to roam the valley, Claire fainted and it was ten minutes before they could wake her up. When they finally got to their rooms and saw the fine elf clothes that had been prepared for them should they wish to change, Claire fainted again.
When she had been revived and the elf had left them alone, both girls jumped onto the huge four poster bed and began jumping up and down, squealing and laughing insanely.
'This is soooooo much better than Hogwarts!' Screamed Sara.
'I know! We're...' Claire froze and her eyes widened. 'Oh my God we're gonna meet the Fellowship!' She screamed. Both girls stood screaming for a moment as the fan girls inside took complete control. It was only after Sara pointed out that every elf in Rivendell could probably hear them that they calmed down.
'Okay.' She gasped. The girls slumped onto the bed. 'How are we going to work this?'
'Work what?'
'Well, we've appeared in Rivendell, which is every fan girls dream, and we've done it!' They had to let another fit of giggles subside before she could continue. 'And the Fellowship is probably arriving any day, and there is no way they are leaving without us.'
Claire stared at her for a moment, and then frowned. 'What? Oh come on don't tell me you don't want to join the fellowship?' Sara asked incredulously.
'No, I do, it's just.' Claire fished her prized copy of The Lord of the Rings out of her bag. 'We know, well, everything! We know what happens to the Fellowship. What if we accidentally change something? And what would they say if they found out we know the future?'
Sara considered this for a moment. 'We don't tell them.'
Claire rolled her eyes. 'Well duh! But they're gonna suspect something, don't you think?'
'Well, we can just tell them, we have visions or something, y'know, we can see the future.' Claire seemed to hesitate for a moment, rolling this idea around in her head; but her desire to meet the Fellowship was too strong, and she gave in.
'Besides,' Sara reassured her as they left to explore, 'finally meeting Legolas in person? I'm willing to take the risk!'
*****
The girls awoke the next morning to the sound of birds singing, with rays of sunlight falling gracefully across their beds. They stretched and snuggled into their overly comfortably beds as the sunlight warmed them, and when both realized the events of the previous day were not a dream, they leapt up and met each other with a thud in their connecting doorway.
'Ouch!'
'Second that.' The girls quickly got dressed amid giggles and shouted suggestions on what to do for the rest of the day, and raced along the hallways to what the elf they had met last night pointed out as, 'the dining room'. The girls raced in to find a large bowl of fruit waiting for them as breakfast. After they had finished, and Claire had fetched her bag with her trusty copy of the Trilogy and her Dictionary, they felt ready to explore once more.
They were half way across a courtyard when Claire made a gasping sound and clutched Sara's arm. 'What?' She demanded.
'Merry and Pippin! Merry and Pippin!' She hissed.
Sara followed her gaze and almost squealed out loud. Merry and Pippin were sat on a bench, munching on apples not 20 feet away from them. Both had to fight incredibly hard not to rush over and hug the cute little hobbits to death. They decided instead that they would awe the hobbits with amazing insight into their journey so far, leading them to the belief the girls could see the future, and well, past.
'Meriadoc Brandybuck.'
'And Peregrin Took.' The girls said in their best likeness of Gandalf. The two hobbits looked up and halted mid-chew. It was all the girls could do not to burst out laughing.
'Err, that's us. And you are?' Merry asked suspiciously, it was obvious the girls weren't elves.
'I'm Claire and this is my friend Sara. We're not from around here either.' She added as they continued to look slightly confused.
'We're from the Shire. Where are you from?' Pippin asked in his most adorably innocent voice.
'Ludlow, well, I'm from Ludlow, Claire here is from Rhayader.' Sara explained. The hobbits continued to look blank.
'Uhh, they're small villages some distance to the North.' Claire lied. The hobbits nodded.
'You're not elves. Are you rangers like strider?' Merry asked.
'Err.' Sara looked at Claire for guidance.
'Sort of. We're from a long way away really, Ara- I mean Strider, wouldn't know us.'
Pippin innocently asked if Ludlow was like the Shire at all and Sara immediately launched into a furious tirade about the spoil-sport locals who hated children. The four of them enjoyed simple conversation for a while, and the hobbits fears and suspicions seemed to disappear. When the girls began their charade about visions, the hobbits couldn't seem to get enough. Merry was in the middle of a particularly amusing story about Sam's old Gaffer when the significance of their presence suddenly occurred to Claire.
'Frodo.' She muttered, as if snapping out of a day dream. The three looked at her in mild surprise for a moment until she seemed to realize where she was.
'Where's Frodo? Is he okay? Is Strider here with you?'
'Whoa girl! Easy up on the third degree will ya?' Sara chided.
'What's it to you if he's here or not?' Came a familiar voice.
The group jumped. They looked up to find Sam staring at them suspiciously.
'Sam! How is he?' Merry asked immediately. Merry and Pippin jumped up and exchanged hugs with their friend.
'he's doin' jus' fine, as a matter o' fact.' He said, still eyeing the girls warily.
'Sam, this is Claire, and this is Sara. There from the North.' Pippin introduced them jauntily.
'They're okay, Sam. They may dress a bit strange, but they seem to be able to predict the future!' Merry explained. Sara couldn't decide if this made Sam look more or less uncomfortable.
'Samwise, please believe you can trust us. I know you are probably the most loyal and brave person I will ever meet, and I would be honoured if we could perhaps become friends?'
Sara and Pippin looked absolutely stumped. Merry seemed taken aback but soon his expression changed to one of curiosity. Sam seemed fazed at first but quickly his expression changed to one of uncertainty. Claire waited patiently but held his gaze, hoping he would see the sincerity of her action and the honesty in what she had said. It was only a moment before Sam's expression softened and he smiled.
'Well, I must say, you seem nice enough. Excuse my rudeness but we ain't exactly 'ad a good couple o' days.' He smiled again, and Claire returned the smile whole-heartedly. Sam had always been one of her favourite characters, and knowing what lay before him, she wanted to show him as much kindness and friendship as she could. Sara beamed with admiration at her friend, excitement filling her with the prospect of the journey and friendships that lay before them. The group relaxed back into idle chatter as the day waned. Soon they were summoned to dinner, and had to go their separate ways, for now. None of them knew what an exciting day lay before them when they woke the next morning.
**END**
Ch 1. The Journey Begins.
'And this is where the royal prince of Midget first got a wedgie, he was a midget you know, and this is where queen Barbara of self-pity hanged herself, Drama queen if you ask me.'
Claire couldn't contain herself any longer, she broke down into hysterics, grasping her sides in pain and trying not to wet herself with laughter.
Sara had done her best to keep a straight face for most of her mock tour, but within seconds she too had cracked up and was trying not to roll around on the floor in front of a bunch of total strangers.
After a few moments Claire wiped her eyes and straightened herself, just in time for a sneering comment from a very snobby old lady that seemed to think their behaviour, 'inappropriate'. Sara sighed and they began to descend a windy staircase into one of Ludlow Castles dungeons. 'Did you see the look on their faces?' Claire giggled as they discussed the local population of boring old people.
'Okay, okay, seriously, this is the dungeon.' Sara held up her arms and gestured around the dark, damp room impressively. 'Where a bunch of dirty thieves were probably used as sex slaves!' The girls burst into another fit of wild hysterics and had to wait several minutes before either could speak again.
'Hey,' Claire gasped as she straightened up, 'Hey, what's that?' She pointed through an archway behind Sara to another in the next room. Sara looked over her shoulder and frowned.
'Strange...' She muttered. The girls entered the room and looked around. It was a large empty chamber with a large archway in the centre. A ragged red veil hung across the arch. Claire gasped and squealed loudly, causing Sara to jump.
'Oh my god! It's just like the archway in Order of the Phoenix!' she was hopping up and down insanely now. 'Just like the one Sirius falls through! Oh my god! It's identical! Maybe this is where J.K got the idea from?'
'I don't think so.' Sara said skeptically. 'This wasn't here before.'
'Oh yeah right. Very funny.' Claire smirked and moved closer to examine the arch.
'I'm serious! I've been round this stupid castle a million times and there has never been a room here before!' Sara almost stamped her foot in frustration. She knew she was right, but proof to the contrary stood 8 feet tall right in front of her.
'Ohhh, mystery!' Claire sniggered. She hesitated when she saw the worried expression on her friends face, she was pretty sure this wasn't Sara's type of humour. 'You serious?' She asked slowly. Sara nodded. Claire frowned. She moved closer to the veil that was swaying serenely across the arch.
'No!' Sara shouted as she raised her hand to touch it. Claire jumped and looked at her friend in alarm. 'Are you mad?' Sara gasped. 'We've found an archway identical to the one that sucks Sirius into DEATH in the Harry Potter books; in a room that didn't even EXIST until today, and you wanna TOUCH it?' The girls stood in silence for a moment as Sara regained control of herself.
'Okay. Maybe you're sorta right.' Claire nodded slowly. 'But, just think of the possibilities, I mean, we don't know what's through here, we could walk through and come out Hogwarts, can you imagine that?' A manic glint appeared in Claire's eyes and for a moment her grin was mirrored on Sara's face. Sara looked at the veil and back at her friend; she bit her lip and considered the possibilities.
'But, Claire come on, none of that's real.' She frowned at her friend who gave her a pathetically disappointed look. 'Right?' She asked. The girls looked at each other for a moment before breaking out into twin evil grins.
'Can't hurt to look?' Claire suggested innocently.
'And no harm done if we're wrong.' Sara agreed.
The girls stood side by side and face the veil. They took a few deep breaths and grinned at each other. 'One...'
'Two...'
'THREE!' they screamed together and jumped forward.
*****
For a few moments it seemed they were suspended in space and time. They couldn't see, hear or feel anything. They a rushing sensation and a howling filled their ears. Lights sped past them and it felt like they were spinning wildly. Claire had a brief impression they were going to shoot out of the Stargate, but just as that idea began to take root the sensation stopped and they found themselves in a crumpled heap on a solid stone floor.
The girls moaned and groaned as they examined their bruises. Not taking any notice of the four figures stood over them. Slowly they adjusted their gaze to their surroundings and found themselves to be in the middle of a large hall surrounded by four...
'Elves!' Squealed Claire. Sara screamed. The elves jumped and three of them raised weapons and aimed directly at the girls' heads. The girls screamed loudly until the fourth Elf strode forward and gave them an order in Elvish. The weapons were lowered and the girls hesitantly got to their feet.
'Sara?'
'Yeah?'
'This isn't Hogwarts.'
'Yeah.'
'This is...'
'Yeah. And that's...'
'Yeah.'
Lord Elrond looked curiously at the two humans in front of him. He suspiciously eyed their unusual clothes and hair styles. 'Who are you?' He asked sternly. 'And what manor of magic allowed you to enter Imladris and appear before us?'
The girls looked wildly at each other and tried to stammer a hurried explanation of what had just happed. Elrond's eyes widened but when they were done he looked thoughtful. One of the other elves stepped forward and asked him something in Sindarin.
'What did he say?' Sara whispered in Claire's ear.
'Oh!' She exclaimed, and hurriedly pulled a book out of her shoulder bag. It was her Sindarin dictionary, and she never left home without it. After a few pages of frantic page flicking, she paused, 'uh-oh. I think he thinks we're spies of Sauron.'
'What? Well tell him we're not!'
'There is no need.' Lord Elrond interrupted, making them both jump. 'I do not believe that is so. Although, you're origin and purpose here is clouded. But I believe there is some reason yet to be discovered.'
The girls exchanged strange looks. When Lord Elrond told them they were to stay in Rivendell until the council, they were in a positive state of euphoria. When the elf maid leading them to their rooms told them they would be free to roam the valley, Claire fainted and it was ten minutes before they could wake her up. When they finally got to their rooms and saw the fine elf clothes that had been prepared for them should they wish to change, Claire fainted again.
When she had been revived and the elf had left them alone, both girls jumped onto the huge four poster bed and began jumping up and down, squealing and laughing insanely.
'This is soooooo much better than Hogwarts!' Screamed Sara.
'I know! We're...' Claire froze and her eyes widened. 'Oh my God we're gonna meet the Fellowship!' She screamed. Both girls stood screaming for a moment as the fan girls inside took complete control. It was only after Sara pointed out that every elf in Rivendell could probably hear them that they calmed down.
'Okay.' She gasped. The girls slumped onto the bed. 'How are we going to work this?'
'Work what?'
'Well, we've appeared in Rivendell, which is every fan girls dream, and we've done it!' They had to let another fit of giggles subside before she could continue. 'And the Fellowship is probably arriving any day, and there is no way they are leaving without us.'
Claire stared at her for a moment, and then frowned. 'What? Oh come on don't tell me you don't want to join the fellowship?' Sara asked incredulously.
'No, I do, it's just.' Claire fished her prized copy of The Lord of the Rings out of her bag. 'We know, well, everything! We know what happens to the Fellowship. What if we accidentally change something? And what would they say if they found out we know the future?'
Sara considered this for a moment. 'We don't tell them.'
Claire rolled her eyes. 'Well duh! But they're gonna suspect something, don't you think?'
'Well, we can just tell them, we have visions or something, y'know, we can see the future.' Claire seemed to hesitate for a moment, rolling this idea around in her head; but her desire to meet the Fellowship was too strong, and she gave in.
'Besides,' Sara reassured her as they left to explore, 'finally meeting Legolas in person? I'm willing to take the risk!'
*****
The girls awoke the next morning to the sound of birds singing, with rays of sunlight falling gracefully across their beds. They stretched and snuggled into their overly comfortably beds as the sunlight warmed them, and when both realized the events of the previous day were not a dream, they leapt up and met each other with a thud in their connecting doorway.
'Ouch!'
'Second that.' The girls quickly got dressed amid giggles and shouted suggestions on what to do for the rest of the day, and raced along the hallways to what the elf they had met last night pointed out as, 'the dining room'. The girls raced in to find a large bowl of fruit waiting for them as breakfast. After they had finished, and Claire had fetched her bag with her trusty copy of the Trilogy and her Dictionary, they felt ready to explore once more.
They were half way across a courtyard when Claire made a gasping sound and clutched Sara's arm. 'What?' She demanded.
'Merry and Pippin! Merry and Pippin!' She hissed.
Sara followed her gaze and almost squealed out loud. Merry and Pippin were sat on a bench, munching on apples not 20 feet away from them. Both had to fight incredibly hard not to rush over and hug the cute little hobbits to death. They decided instead that they would awe the hobbits with amazing insight into their journey so far, leading them to the belief the girls could see the future, and well, past.
'Meriadoc Brandybuck.'
'And Peregrin Took.' The girls said in their best likeness of Gandalf. The two hobbits looked up and halted mid-chew. It was all the girls could do not to burst out laughing.
'Err, that's us. And you are?' Merry asked suspiciously, it was obvious the girls weren't elves.
'I'm Claire and this is my friend Sara. We're not from around here either.' She added as they continued to look slightly confused.
'We're from the Shire. Where are you from?' Pippin asked in his most adorably innocent voice.
'Ludlow, well, I'm from Ludlow, Claire here is from Rhayader.' Sara explained. The hobbits continued to look blank.
'Uhh, they're small villages some distance to the North.' Claire lied. The hobbits nodded.
'You're not elves. Are you rangers like strider?' Merry asked.
'Err.' Sara looked at Claire for guidance.
'Sort of. We're from a long way away really, Ara- I mean Strider, wouldn't know us.'
Pippin innocently asked if Ludlow was like the Shire at all and Sara immediately launched into a furious tirade about the spoil-sport locals who hated children. The four of them enjoyed simple conversation for a while, and the hobbits fears and suspicions seemed to disappear. When the girls began their charade about visions, the hobbits couldn't seem to get enough. Merry was in the middle of a particularly amusing story about Sam's old Gaffer when the significance of their presence suddenly occurred to Claire.
'Frodo.' She muttered, as if snapping out of a day dream. The three looked at her in mild surprise for a moment until she seemed to realize where she was.
'Where's Frodo? Is he okay? Is Strider here with you?'
'Whoa girl! Easy up on the third degree will ya?' Sara chided.
'What's it to you if he's here or not?' Came a familiar voice.
The group jumped. They looked up to find Sam staring at them suspiciously.
'Sam! How is he?' Merry asked immediately. Merry and Pippin jumped up and exchanged hugs with their friend.
'he's doin' jus' fine, as a matter o' fact.' He said, still eyeing the girls warily.
'Sam, this is Claire, and this is Sara. There from the North.' Pippin introduced them jauntily.
'They're okay, Sam. They may dress a bit strange, but they seem to be able to predict the future!' Merry explained. Sara couldn't decide if this made Sam look more or less uncomfortable.
'Samwise, please believe you can trust us. I know you are probably the most loyal and brave person I will ever meet, and I would be honoured if we could perhaps become friends?'
Sara and Pippin looked absolutely stumped. Merry seemed taken aback but soon his expression changed to one of curiosity. Sam seemed fazed at first but quickly his expression changed to one of uncertainty. Claire waited patiently but held his gaze, hoping he would see the sincerity of her action and the honesty in what she had said. It was only a moment before Sam's expression softened and he smiled.
'Well, I must say, you seem nice enough. Excuse my rudeness but we ain't exactly 'ad a good couple o' days.' He smiled again, and Claire returned the smile whole-heartedly. Sam had always been one of her favourite characters, and knowing what lay before him, she wanted to show him as much kindness and friendship as she could. Sara beamed with admiration at her friend, excitement filling her with the prospect of the journey and friendships that lay before them. The group relaxed back into idle chatter as the day waned. Soon they were summoned to dinner, and had to go their separate ways, for now. None of them knew what an exciting day lay before them when they woke the next morning.
**END**