Disclaimer: Righto, YuYuHakusho is most certainly not mine. If I did.....there would be mush-snuggle piles every other episode, and there would be far more Karasu and Kuronue.
However, since that is not the case, and there appears to be a sad lack of Kuronue fics (maybe because we only get to see him for about 10 minutes? Oh well), I wrote this. At 1:00 in the friggin morning.
Enjoy!
"I'm really gonna do it today Kurama. I can feel it!" The joyous bat demon cried, spreading his thin ebony wings eagerly.
"Let's think a moment. This sounds familiar, yes, yes, I think I've heard it before!" Youko Kurama replied sarcastically, eyeing his friend with wary golden eyes.
This would be Kuronue's fifty-ninth attempt to date at flying (They counted by the scars earned each time). Others had failed... well, miserably would be far too kind a word. Balloons filled with helium, gliding on parachutes, trying on his own thin wings, bribing normal bats to help him, stealing broomsticks from the moon-witches of the east, creating fake wings out of paper mache, swallowing the helium that was supposed to have filled the balloons (This. Did. Not. Work. Kurama's follower's still cracked up for hours every time either of them got so much as got the hiccups, as Kuronue had dared his leader to try some too).
FLASHBACK
Kuronue bowed deeply in front of the gathered audience of rogues and thieves and proudly held up a large black balloon.
"This, my friends, "he announced loudly "is the day I FLY!!!"
This was met with cheers. And boos. And taunts. And many rolled eyes and groans.
Youko stood by the soapbox Kuronue had 'recruited'; arms folded and face skeptical.
Kuronue punctured the balloon with one long claw and placed his mouth to the hole, sucking in the helium gas.
"Well? Did it work?" Kurama drawled after several long seconds.
Kuronue's face fell and his long pointy ears drooped. He wasn't going up. Not even swelling! Damn ningen cartoons, they would PAY for lying to him! His throat did feel a little funny though.
"Aww, shit." The voice that spoke that was not the deep tones that the group was used to. It was high, squeaky, and sounded like a man that had been kicked in the balls. Kuronue clapped his hands over his mouth.
Youko's golden eyes grew wide with shock.
"Kuronue? Are you alright?"
"WHAT THE HELL?!?!" Kuronue shrieked. He started babbling random nonsense, and instead of his own voice, all he heard was frantic squeaking and distorted noises.
The entire assembly was silent for approximately 2 seconds. Then all that could be heard was laughter.
Youko tried to maintain his dignity, covering his giggles with his hand, but that soon cracked and he had to sit down, clutching his sides.
"Fine then, Mr. High-And-Mighty, YOU try some!" Kuronue shoved the balloon in Youko's face. The crowd grew silent to hear their leader's answer.
"Why should I?"
Kuronue knelt and whispered something into the silver fox ears.
"And the one time....that rabbit demon....all three...whipped cream...."
Youko gulped and grabbed the balloon, and taking a deep breath, he started sucking. The demons shifted, leaning in closer, staring expectantly.
"Well? What are you all looking at?" the thief lord glared at his crowd of minions. It was too much for them too handle, and Kuronue grinned at his sweet revenge as Youko attempted to bellow his guffawing followers into silence.
END FLASHBACK
Kuronue had tried variations of each and yet even more in the past. It was a fanatic dream of the bat demon to fly, to soar high in the sky among the birds and clouds, one that his friends had scoffed at many times, though they had often aided his more eccentric plans, more out of boredom than anything else.
They were standing on top of a high rocky cliff that overlooked a deep canyon, Kuronue standing proudly by his new invention; Youko sprawled lazily under a tree that tossed soft new green leaves in the light wind.
"It won't work, idiot, so just give up and join me in the shade. It's too hot for this," the fox demon called out, almost desperately.
Spring was receding quickly, and Makai summers of this particular region were well known for their scorching winds and dry heat that left nothing but the toughest demons alive. Most of the sensible ones had fled to the cooler north lands a long time ago. The elegant creature fanned himself with one pale hand, the other shading his brow to watch. His band of thieves watched from a farther distance away, muttering in discontent about the weather and how they were wasting their time on yet another crazy scheme. Fox and bat demon both ignored them.
"STOP DISCOURAGING ME. It will work, just you wait and see," came the curt reply.
Pulling on a long set of gloves over his normal black silk straps, Kuronue paced quickly around his flying machine, checking to make sure everything was working and in order.
It was a strange looking device indeed, like an extra large set of wings. It had taken several weeks to steal everything needed to assemble it, but Youko, being naturally curious, allowed him the time and resources. Besides, Kuronue had saved his silver-tailed ass more times than he could count; he owed it to him to indulge a little.
Black silk linen was stretched tightly over thin bamboo rods tied in the shape of two long thin wings, carefully curved and connected to form one giant swath of black. A square frame hung below like the rib of some enormous starved bird of prey. Various straps and belts had been rigged to hold the passenger safely in place, and a stylized bat was painted in silver on the top.
"Go over the list, Kurama. I want to make sure everything is perfect."
"Must I? You've already triple, no quadruple-checked everything, just go and get this over with. I want you able to walk out of here by tomorrow. No death traps this time," came the teasing reply. This was met with a glare so icy it could freeze a Koorime in her tracks, so Kurama sighed and ran a hand through silver strands, thinking off all the things Kuronue had rattled off earlier.
"Braking gear for landing?"
"Check." The answer was determined and eager.
"Wings for take off?" Duh those would be there, that was the entire machine, everything else was for decoration.
"Check."
"Safety belt for...safety?" Since when did Kuronue, a thief as renowned as Youko himself and wanted in just as many prisons (Possibly more), care about personal safety?
"Check."
"Protective gloves?" Why the hell did he need those anyhow? Kurama wondered for a second before continuing.
"Check."
"Scarf...for dramatic effect." Now that was pure Kuronue, 100% eccentric old bat demon.
"Check." He gave the ends of the white scarf an extra flip, swinging it back around his neck.
"Lucky pendant?" He never took it off. Never. Not even when he slept or bathed. Kurama knew this quite well, but he had been told to ask, so he did.
"Duh."
"No need to act like the snarky little bitch you are, you're the one who told me to ask it." Glare. Flipped finger. Two flipped fingers. Two flipped fingers and a red tongue stuck out. Two flipped fingers, one tongue and one set of crossed eyes later, the check-over continued.
"Goggles. Really, do you absolutely need goggles?"
"Yup." Pulling the huge aviator goggles (They had gone all the way to a human airport for this one) over his head and slim pointed ears, he tightened the straps.
"You look like an idiot, you know that, right?"
"An idiot Kurama, or a genius? ANSWER ME THAT!!!"
". . . An idiot."
"Well, damn you, you. . .constantly drunk, tremendously fat, purple nosed, pimply, duck-footed, round-shouldered, stalker-ish, big-footed, psychopathic...not sexy vixen, you!"
And with that, Kuronue grabbed hold of the handlebars of the flying machine and ran over the cliff, taking a tremendous leap as slippered feet left the sandy ground.
As soon as he was fully away from the cliff, he dropped like a stone.
Youko snapped to his feet, sprinting to the edge of the cliff in panic, leaning over to see... Kuronue flying. He was gliding, the huge wings floating gracefully on the breeze that sped through the gorge, diving and dipping, wheeling and turning as easily as if he was born doing this. Demon thieves crowded behind their fox leader in mob fashion, milling franticly to see this new marvel. One or two lesser henchmen fell off, their cries echoing, but no one really noticed. They were too busy gaping at the ecstatic bat apparition, who proudly saluted with one hand and continued weaving in and out of the currents of air that buffeted his little hang- glider.
Youko let out a wild cheer for his friend's happiness, the cry bouncing off red stone and fading gradually, echoes rebounding over and over.
Somewhere in the background, a demon muttered in a low voice to his companion,
"Told ya he could do it. Pay up."
"Daaaaaamnit."Read and Review, please, please!!!