X-Men, meet the Starr Brothers, Special Edition!
Chapter 2: Just a little insanity!
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(Xavier Institute)
A little while later, all the commotion over the LA mutants named Paul and Craig Starr slightly calmed down. Lance and Craig got a serious talking to by Spirit and Recondo. Meanwhile, the X-Girls were gathered around the new Misfit called Starchild. Paul happily conversed with his new "fan club", while four of the X-Boys, Remy LeBeau, Piotr Rasputin, Ray Crisp and Scott Summers, were watching, and they were none too happy with seeing the glammed-out teen talking to their girlfriends. One could note that Scott had some wounds on him, particularly a black eye.
"Gambit reeeally don't like Starchild."
"Ugh." Scott sighed. "We're being jealous, guys! They're probably just fascinated by those fancy '80s throwback' clothes he wears. Look at him! He comes from an old Poison video!"
"I'm not too sure." Peter sighed. Colossus was often called "Peter" because his name was the Russian equivalent. "Kitty's eyes seem to say something different."
"Okay, I'll give him the fact that he's got charm and he's got charisma." Ray tried to explain Paul's sudden popularity. "Maybe Hawk forgot to mention his powers. Maybe Paul has the power to make women fall in love with him."
"Nope." Hank McCoy, aka Beast, joined the boys at the table. "I talked to Hawk."
"Maybe there's something in those roses he gave them." Scott suggested.
"If dere is, Remy want some!" Gambit laughed.
"Guys, it's not a power, nor is there anything in the roses." Hank told them. "It's his personality."
"His personality?" Scott looked at Hank in disbelief. "He can mimic movie stars and he can sing. His fashion sense is twenty years off, and he is nuts!"
"Paul's very optimistic. He's very positive. He loves to have fun and he finds a bright side in everything. He's got the sweet personality that women find attractive. Very attractive." Hank then turned to Paul and saw him with a beautiful guitar with a 5-pointed star-shaped body. "Not to mention women love musicians."
"Nothing like punching Summers out to make a guy's day." Lance grinned, sitting with the five X-Men. Scott glared at him.
"You do realize that Kitty appears to have a huge crush on Paul." Scott reminded. He pointed to the X-Girls. "How come Althea and Wanda aren't with them?" Scott didn't notice Althea and Wanda pass by.
"Paul's cute, but he's no Todd. That's why." Althea answered as she passed.
"Not my type." Wanda shrugged.
"What're you gonna do?" Scott asked Lance. Avalanche shrugged.
"Don't worry about it." Lance grinned. "He's harmless." He turned to him and his eyes widened. Kitty was sitting next to Paul as he strummed his guitar, her head on his shoulder. "Okay. I hate to say his, but you may have a point, Summers." Ray then saw Tabitha sit next to Paul and put her head on Paul's other shoulder.
"Paul will die." Ray stared at the unknowing "superstar" with a murderous glare. "Oh yes. Paul will die." Scott, Peter, Remy, and Lance stared at Berzerker, and each other. They gave each other a "He's lost it" look. Meanwhile, Paul was playing his guitar. Tabitha and Kitty sat next to him, their heads on his shoulders.
"Play that song again, Pauly. Please?" Tabitha asked cutely.
"Like, I liked that song." Kitty sighed.
"Well, I have written a song." Paul then started strumming and singing. In his normal singing voice, he sounded a little bit like his musical idol, Paul Stanley: "In a little town, a place called Bayville." Paul then strummed his guitar. "I had a fun time there, oh what a thrill." He stopped. "I haven't finished it. I'm not a good songwriter."
"That's okay." Kitty said.
"Anyway, you guys like John Mellencamp?" Paul then started playing and singing a cover of "Hurts so Good", imitating the down-home rock singer. Ray and Peter got up, really mad.
"Hey, c'mon!" Remy tried to calm them down. Berzerker and Colossus marched up to Paul. A grinning Starchild waved.
"Hey guys." Paul said, in his typical fun tone. Peter turned to his metal form and angrily grabbed Paul by the neck, making the self-proclaimed superstar squeak. Colossus then slammed Starchild against the wall. Starchild stared at him in confusion. A furious Berzerker stood with Peter, hands charged with electricity.
"Ray!" Tabitha snapped.
"Peter, put him down!" Kitty ordered. Neither boy budged.
"Think you're hot stuff, huh?!?!" Ray fumed. "Let's see how hot you are when you have 1,000 volts going through you, Starboy!!"
"Da." Colossus pressed tighter on Paul's neck. "Kitty is mine!"
"YOURS?!?!" Lance leapt up.
"Ray you jerk, leave Paul alone!" Tabby angrily pushed him. "He didn't do anything to you!"
"Peter, put Paul down! He didn't do anything!" Kitty said. Paul struggled for air under Colossus's iron grip.
"What'd I do? What'd I do?" Paul wondered.
"Peter, put him down NOW!" Kitty snapped. Peter reluctantly de-armored and put down the "superstar". Lance took the opportunity, and speared Colossus to the ground, making the big Russian let out an "OOF!"
"What the--?" Ray wondered, while watching Avalanche punch out Peter. Ray did not notice Craig nearby, pulling a cop's nightstick out of his jacket and sneaking up to him.
"Ray, look out!" Tabitha warned. Berzerker turned around and got a nightstick shot to the gut from Craig.
"Attack my brother, huh?" Craig snarled. "Let's see you face me." Darkstar hit a wheezing Ray with a backhand, making the electro-shooter spin and fall. Craig then lifted him to his feet. Craig let out a roar like a deranged wild animal as he threw Ray into the wall. Craig then stomped on Ray's sides, snarling. Remy, Scott and Hank had to break it up.
"What da matter wit you?" Gambit snapped at Craig. "You could've killed 'im, homme!"
"He tried to kill my brother, Cajun." Craig snarled. "Let me go!" Hank tended to Ray. He had a bloody nose, and a couple bruises on his sides, no major damage.
"That psycho tried to kill me!" Ray pointed at Craig. The ex-gang member spat at the former Morlock.
"Get him out of here." Hank nodded at Craig. Remy and Scott pulled at Craig, dragging him out. Tabby and Kitty were all over a dazed Paul.
"Are you okay, Paul?" Tabby stroked Starchild's long raven-colored hair gently.
"Sorry about Ray and Peter. They can be such jerks." Kitty reassured. She looked over at a brawling Lance and Peter. "Lance too."
"Man, Metal-dude should get a grip!" Paul joked, massaging his neck. "Just not on me!" A giggling Boom-Boom and Shadowcat helped Paul to his feet.
"Come on, Paul." Tabby pushed Kitty away, and held Paul tight. "Let's take a walk. Just you and me." Tabby led Paul away. Kitty fumed.
"Like, hey!" Kitty snapped at Tabitha, shoving her. "I wanna take Paul for a walk!"
"Sister, you're already stringing along Rockhead and that Iron Man wannabe Colossus! Don't start stringing along my Paul!" Tabitha retorted.
"Yours?!? Like, Paul is mine!" Kitty snapped.
"No, he's mine!" Tabby shoved Kitty.
"Mine!" Kitty shoved her back.
"Mine!"
"MINE!!"
"MINE!!!"
"MINE!!"
"MINE!!"
"MINE!!!"
"Paul is mine and there's nothing you can do about it, so NYEAH!!!" Tabby razzed Kitty.
"Like, THAT'S IT!!" Kitty jumped Tabby and the two of them started to cat fight. Paul watched impartially.
"C'mon ladies, there's plenty of Starchild for everyone." Paul tried to break it up. Meanwhile, Scott and Remy were struggling with Craig, who managed to force his way out when they were just outside the mansion. The former gang member stared at Cyclops and Gambit intensely.
"Look pal, I don't know who you think you are…" Scott started to warn. Craig smirked.
"I know about you." Craig smirked. "I know you are angry with my brother Paul. I know you are jealous of him. Your friend made a big mistake. Warning Paul to stay away from Jean and Rogue won't help."
"And why not?" Gambit asked sarcastically. He then saw Tabitha fly by, like she was thrown. The Cajun charmer heard a Southern-accented voice scream, "PAUL IS MINE!!!" Remy started grumbling.
"Paul doesn't go after women. Women go after him." Craig walked away. "I suggest you lay off my brother. If I don't get you, your girlfriends will."
"Thug." Scott muttered.
"Mama's boy." Craig muttered back. Meanwhile, ol' Paul Starr found himself a new walking partner in Rogue.
"Well sugah, this is a nice place." Rogue said to Starchild.
"I'm sure this place is. Don't get me wrong, babe. What I don't get is why my fellow Misfits and you X-Dudes fight all the time. We're all good guys here. We're all just a bunch of good folks underneath the craziness. It reminds me of a song." Paul then started singing. "Why can't we be friends? Why can't we be friends? Why can't we be friends? Why can't we be friends?" Paul then saw Rogue get lifted by an invisible force. She apparently was not in control.
"HEY!!" Rogue screamed. "PUT ME DOWN!! WAHHHH!!!" She was sent flying in the distance.
"Huh?" Paul watched Rogue fly away. "Maybe her flight powers are broken." He turned around and found Jean on his arm.
"She'll be fine. Her flight powers tend to get weird at times. She's still getting used to them." Jean fluttered her eyelashes seductively as Paul smiled and walked on. Scott and Gambit watched with dropped jaws. Cyclops then noticed Baby Beak crawl by with his little whiffle bat.
"Can I borrow that?" Scott asked the bird-like baby. "Thanks." He took the bat and bonked himself on the head. He then handed the bat to Remy. Gambit bonked himself on the head and handed the bat back to Scott. They kept bonking themselves with the bat, and little Barney watched.
"Goofbawlls." Barney giggled, pointing at Scott and Remy. Toad looked at the two guys as he went to get Barney.
"Man, you two seriously need help." Toad laughed as he took back the bat and picked up Barney. "Those two are jealous of your new Uncle Paul."
"Why?" The little bird-baby asked.
"Because their girls have crushes on Uncle Paul." Todd explained. Meanwhile, Kurt, Amara, and Bobby were watching "Caddyshack" on TV. Craig walked into the room silently. Jamie ran in and ducked under the couch cushions, desperate to hide from the triplets.
"What is that?" Craig scowled at the TV.
"Caddyshack. This movie is so funny." Bobby laughed.
"The little gopher is sooo cute." Amara added with a smile.
"You wanna adopt it?" Craig spat with plenty of sarcastic venom. Amara turned around and glared at the ex-street punk.
"Do you enjoy ruining other people's fun?" Amara asked.
"Yes." Craig gave her a cold look, his eye flashing for a second.
"Leave him alone, Magma. He's a jerk." Bobby told the princess. She sat back down, and Craig simply leaned against the wall, head down, angry about something like he always was.
"Don't tell those nutty triplets I'm here." Jamie begged.
"We von't." Kurt promised. Bobby and Amara nodded in agreement. Craig said nothing. The triplets ran in.
"Where's Jamie?" Quinn asked.
"Haven't seen him." Kurt answered.
"He's under the couch." Craig said. The triplets lifted up the cushion and found Multiple.
"Hi, cutie!" They said cutely.
"Craig, you bigmouth!" Bobby snapped.
"Trust no one." Craig said. "No one should trust me, and I trust no one." Jamie ran away, cursing out Craig. An enraged Craig gave chase, firing his laser. Another chase went on as well. Bobby, Kurt, and Amara saw a laughing Paul run by, with a "Hi guys!" Magma squealed.
"Wait for me, hot stuff!" Amara leapt off the couch and ran after Paul.
"How does he do it?" Kurt asked Bobby in an amazed tone. Bobby watched as the other X-Girls pursued Paul.
"I don't know. I don't know." Bobby said. "Those Starrs are insane. Women fall in love with Paul, and Craig's a bad-tempered jerk. Besides Kurt, if Amanda was here, she'd be all over Paul like butter on toast."
"You have a point." Kurt sighed. "I vish I could get all ze babes like he can." Paul noticed Multiple run by as he ran, triplets hot on his heels.
"Hmm………" Starchild thought to himself. "That Madrox kid has potential. He could become one of the world's greatest womanizers. Right up there with Casanova and James Bond and little ol' me." Paul immediately began cooking up ideas.
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(Xavier's Office)
"I must admit, I find those Starr brothers unique." Storm said to Hawk, Xavier, Logan and Hank.
"Yes. They both have………quirks." Hank agreed, remembering the incident earlier with Craig and Ray. "It's Craig I'm concerned about. I thought Logan had a temper until I met this kid. He looks like he'll strike at you with blind rage at any moment."
"Mmm." Storm agreed. "I never thought I would be frightened by a child until I saw Craig. He has those eyes. Those eyes make him look like he has no soul."
"I could sense immense rage, hatred, and spite from him a mile away." Xavier sighed. "Paul is the opposite. From him, I sensed incredible positive emotions. An endless optimism."
"Paul and Craig. Total opposites." Logan shook his head.
"According to Psyche-Out, It's the result of their opposite upbringing. Remember, Paul came from a rich, yet kind family. Craig grew up in an environment where anger and hatred flowed like water. First in an abusive home, then on the streets. In fact, I'm surprised that Craig didn't kill Paul when they first met in the streets of LA." Hawk said. He saw a laughing Paul pass by, squealing X-Girls after him. "I see Paul has gotten some fans."
"I'm not surprised." Hank grinned. "I had to deal with that too. Back in my day, women constantly were after me. Especially in high school and college." Logan and Hawk burst out laughing, and Storm and Xavier rolled their eyes. Beast glared at them. "What? It's true! Every guy in high school and college hated me because I could get any girl I wanted!"
"By the way Hawk, how did GI Joe come across the Starr Brothers?" Xavier asked. Hawk chuckled.
"Well, GI Joe and the Misfits were called in to investigate disappearances of runaway children and mutants. We discovered that Dr. Mindbender was holding these kids in an old mansion to use for his experiments. He was also chasing after Paul and Craig, who were living in an old abandoned movie studio at the time of their capture. They had escaped Mindbender and they ran into Lady Jaye, Recondo, and Cover Girl. The three Joes helped Paul and Craig free the kids, who luckily, all escaped experimentation." Hawk replied. "After that, Cover Girl offered Misfit membership to all the kids. Most refused, some said they'd consider, and Paul and Craig were the only ones who accepted. Actually, Paul did. Craig refused, but decided to come along out of respect for Lady Jaye, Recondo, and Cover Girl."
"Wow." Logan blinked.
"So, you rescued the Starr brothers, and as a thank you, they joined the Misfits." Storm said.
"That's the jist of it." Hawk said.
Something tells me that the Misfits are going to end up with a lot more recruits soon. Beast sighed. The blue-furred ape-like scientist then saw an enraged Ray and Peter pass by.
"WHERE IS STARCHILD?!?!" Ray snarled.
"I WILL MURDER THAT STAR-FACED PUNK!!!" Peter snapped. Scott and Gambit were not far behind.
"GAMBIT SICK OF STARCHILD!!!" Remy ran by with a chainsaw.
"PAUL'S GONNA FRY!!!" Scott had on his visor.
"Oh no." Logan groaned, getting up and joining the chase. "Cajun, put that down!"
"GAMBIT GONNA RE-ENACT FRIDAY THE 13TH ON PAUL!!!!"
"I GET FIRST SHOT!!" Ray exclaimed.
"And I thought things were bad enough before the Starr brothers." Storm sighed. "At least things can't get any worse."
"Hi honey!" A familiar voice called out. Ororo's face paled.
"Oh no…" She moaned.
Looks like the insanity level just got kicked up a notch! What's gonna happen next? Read & Review Please!!! Suggestions for next part welcome!