Chapter 6: Average Tourist

AN: I'm a mutant pickle, short and thin,
Now it's time for this chapter to begin,
If you couldn't notice, can't you see,
I do not own D B Z.

That sucked.

Hey, I finally updated! Great, huh? This chapter was fun! For the twenty billionth time, I'm so sorry that I never update. The reason I don't is a from a horrible mixture from my schedule, my writer's block, and my other stories that I'm not having as many problems on.

Actually, I've got a new plan. SHORTER CHAPTERS! As you may have noticed by the bar on the side, this chapter is much shorter than the previous ones. I've decided to overall make my chapters shorter, because it will allow me to update more frequently and probably give me less headaches!

Back to the main matter, I seriously love this story. I don't want to stop it at all! I promise you that I'll finish it. It may take for ever and end up being ten chapters (I know what I want to happen in 8(/ 9 possibly)), but it will get done! Don't give up on me! Think of it as a yearly treat, which is how long I think it's been since I last updated. Just kidding, I'll start doing more with this, I promise!

I'm putting up a variety of things and I'm just not as into DBZ as I used to be, but this will have a valid ending, even if it's chapter eleven which I post ten years from now. With summer break here (and my new computer!), I'll write as much as I can, but I have over seven major chapter stories, most of which I haven't planned endings for, and then I have college which always slows people's writing down as I've seen, and I'm bad enough as is. But keep your eyes open, I still want to get this baby done!

Oh! The town name came from a situation in my first and as of now only game of Scrabble in which I really needed to use a "u". Here goes!!

The wind whipped around the coffee flavored jawbreaker as he flew in a sort of north westerly direction from Remo. "I sure hope I find one of these towns soon," he muttered. "And which ever one I do find first, it had better not be like those last two accursed towns! Especially not Remo. I didn't think anything could be worse than Ichu City. That was the most pointless chapter in fanfiction history!"

He suddenly stopped dead in his tracks and waited in fear for retribution from the author.

However, the author knew fully well that this was true and did not want to punish the lead character for stating the facts this time, so Vegito continued on his way.

The land sped underneath him as he flew. Well, actually it didn't. He flew over it so it appeared to be moving very quickly underneath him. But technically Earth is always moving, so I guess it was. Anyway, he somehow scanned the horizon for one of the four cities which he was pretty sure he would be able to notice since they were bigger than Remo, and Remo was big enough for it's own power plant.

"I hope that idiot wasn't wrong," he suddenly exclaimed, realizing that his only source of information was a man who called the study of land and political boundaries "geology". "If I don't find anything, that stupid town will feel my wrath! Why are there no good cities out there?" Just then, as if from no where, he noticed a small skyline of a fairly large town, at least 20,000 if not more residents. "Finally!" he exclaimed happily. "With a city this size, there's no way I can't find out how to get home!" He somehow accelerated and flew down into the sea of buildings. Well, more like a good sized lake.

This town appeared to be fine. People were happily and unhappily roaming the streets and shopping, going to lunch, or to work. They didn't seem to be congregated anywhere or talking about the whole Buu situation from a few days earlier, any insane mining industries, or power outages. Really, this appeared to be a normal town.

"It looks like I'll be able to get easy answers here," he commented as he took in the scenery. "But why am I expecting it to be okay? The last three chapters have obviously proven that some insane problem will show up and it won't be well written at all."

Again he waited in fear, and again there was no retribution from the author, who knew that this, too, was true. "I'm wasting time," he thought. "The longer I float around thinking, the longer this chapter will be. I'll go try the citizens."

He flew into the streets and once again began his routine of trying to get someone's attention. As they walked, Vegito stopped in front of people's faces and attempted to be noticed, but, as usual, was not.

Finally, he saw a young woman sitting on the side of a fountain and decided to try and see if someone who was stationary and not talking would be a better choice, since he never really had tried before. He flew until he was in front of her eyes.

"Excuse me, miss, but I was wondering..."

"Huh?" she said, jumping a little and looking forward. "Who's there?"

"I'm right in front of you!" Vegito replied, not angrily because for some reason, he was in a good mood today (probably his Gokuness finally coming through). "I am Vegito, a victim of Majin Buu who is still stuck as a jawbreaker. I'm looking for some answers."

"Oh," she replied, looking directly at him. "Hi! You must be new in town."

Vegito was taken aback. Wasn't she going to run away, or scream, or try to eat him? However, the girl sat there, looking at him as if he were just a usual person you'd meet everyday.

"Um, excuse me?" he exclaimed in his shock. "I'm a talking piece of candy! You're not even going to do an over blown wild take?"

"No," she answered. "Why should I?"

"Because I'm a freak! You probably can't tell with my voice the way it is, but I'm actually two people fused into one also! I'm expecting a reaction from this!"

"Sorry, but you probably won't get one from anyone in town. You definitely are new if you don't know that."

"Why?!" he said, not upsetly, but interested in the fact that this strange lady didn't seem to care about his odd form.

"You see, we've got some pretty interesting citizens here in Qusoda."

"Where am I?"

"Qusoda. How'd you get here, anyways?"

"I flew from that accursed Remo." Vegito answered. "I'm trying to find my way home. ...What did you mean by interesting citizens? I'm not going to have to save the entire city, am I?"

"Probably not," she answered. "It's not like we have monsters or anything. We've just got things like a talking horse, a troop of flying monkeys, a man who turns into a penguin every time the third Tuesday is the 20th; nothing big."

"...Right. Let's make this fast. Where's West City in comparison to here?"

"I couldn't tell you!" she replied with a smile.

Vegito was finally getting mad. "Why not?!!!"

"Cause I'm not sure. Try asking some of the other people. Do you want some help?"

The crime fighting jawbreaker sighed. What else could happen to him this year? "Why not," he sighed with his demented, chipmunk like voice. "Who are you, anyway?"

"I'm Rumiko. Nothing special about me. Come on, let's find out where West City is!"

"Why do I have a bad feeling about this?" Vegito thought as he followed his new acquaintance through the streets.

Rumiko appeared to have a destination in mind, as she didn't bother to stop any of the people she passed on the street to see if they knew, and, with Vegito's recent luck, probably did. He thought it best not to question her; every time he had tried to ask something recently everything ended up going wrong.

Eventually, they came upon a small restaurant among many other tiny buildings. She opened the door and motioned to the jawbreaker to follow her inside. There was a mild crowd of people chatting and eating inside the place, and the atmosphere was that of a friendly group of people that knew each other.

"Hey, Rumiko!" one man said. "What's with the floating rock?"

"It's not a rock, it's a jawbreaker," she replied, sitting down at one of the tables and picking up the menu.

"Oh, okay," the man answered, and went back to talking with his table mates and eating his soup.

Vegito was once again overwhelmed by the response, or rather, lack of response. "Don't these people care that I'm I freak of nature?" he whispered to new acquaintance.

"I all ready told you, we've got a lot of strange things here in Qusoda. You're just like another person from out of town, except you're a piece of candy."

"Well, why are you looking for food anyway? Aren't you supposed to be helping me find out how to get to West City? Plus, I'm hungry and I don't think I can eat and the smell of all this food isn't helping. Oh, I can smell..."

"I'm hungry, too," she replied. "Anyway, I told someone I'd meet them here. And he's the sort of guy who would know how to get there. So just take a seat and get a drink."

"I all ready told you, I don't have a mouth! And how am I supposed to sit without any legs? All I've done is flown for the last three days!"

"You don't have to make a scene," Rumiko said, eyeing him strangely for the first time. "Just try to relax. You'll never get anything done if you keep worrying about getting where you're going. Sometimes you have to stop to smell the daisies."

"Well, I would smell if I had a nose! Wait, I guess I could smell the food, but that's probably only from my Saiyan..."

Just then, a girl in the back right corner fell out of her chair, grabbing her head. "What's wrong, Jeannette?" one of the people at her table exclaimed.

Everyone in the restaurant watched her wriggle around on the ground. After about half a minute of this strange behavior, Jeannette's skull suddenly exploded.

"Well, that's a new one," Rumiko muttered while she and the others stared in disbelief.

"I can see her parachute, she's okay," one man suddenly said.

"Dude, what are you talking about?!" another occupant of the restaurant replied.

Suddenly, out from the place where her skull had combusted from, a small, green, reptilian creature came hopping out.

"Is that a baby alien?" one of the waiters asked.

"I don't know, let's ask Jeannette!" another man answered. Everyone got really large beads of sweat by the sides of their heads, even Vegito.

The small alien looked around at the people and growled as menacingly as something of that size could.

"Well, now I've seen everything..." Vegito mumbled to himself, wondering how his life/ lives could have become so insane in only a week.

Just then, the creature jumped it's way through the crowd, turned and hissed again, and broke though the door, which didn't do too much damage considering it's size.

Everyone stared after it.

"Oh well, what can you do?" someone finally said, and they all returned to what they were doing as the girl still lay on the floor with her wound magically healed due to the magic of overly-paranoid American editors.

Vegito thought he was on the verge of having a sweet sugary center attack (well, I'm pretty sure he doesn't have a heart). "Don't you care about what just happened?!" he exclaimed. "What if that thing starts hurting people?!"

"We've learned not to worry too much here," Rumiko replied. "Besides, the first time someone saw that guy turn into a penguin it was pretty scary, but every thing worked out."

"But that thing just burst from that woman's skull! She's... um, "hurt"... yeah. Anyway, I really think this is a serious situation!"

"Then stop complaining and do something. It's not that hard," Rumiko answered. "But I seriously don't think..."

Just then, a blood curdling scream cut through the friendly silence. The people once again got up from their seats and to the door and windows to see what was going on.

The alien had latched itself onto a woman's face and appeared to be trying to sink it's tiny fangs into her skull.

"See what I..." Vegito began angrily.

"We need to stop that thing!" one lady exclaimed. "Let's go!"

The people poured out of the building, as did many other people, all getting ready to attempt to rid the town of this new menace.

Vegito levitated in the same spot in shock. These people hadn't run away and hid, nor did they stand there helpless waiting for someone else to come in and take care of things. They had gone out on their own without any complaints to fix their own catastrophe.

"I never thought I'd see the day where one of us didn't have to help people in need," Vegito said to himself. "I mean, they may need me, but they don't think they do! This is great!" For the first time since Majin Buu had turned him into a coffee flavored sucker, he happily flew into the streets to see with he could do, and not resentfully.

AN: Well, there you go! A new chappie! Yay! I actually had this done a while ago, but while pondering over my new shorter chapter policy, I realized that this was probably a good enough ending. Cliffies are always good. I'm also getting big on "planning everything" before I write, so I'm going to make plans for the next several chapters, which will also allow me to update more. Please don't think "So what if FMP updated? It took ten months! Who knows how long the next one will be?" If it's over two months, I will eat baked beans, and I despise those, so as you can see, I'm trying to become a better author in the sense that I actually update ;)! Please review, and if you want to flame me for taking so long, go right ahead!

Oh, yeah! In trying to get ideas for this chapter (and many of my other stories), I sometimes randomly go up to people and say "What happens next?" without saying anything else. While doing that, my friend Jeannette said, "My skull explodes and a baby alien comes hopping out." I then realized that it would actually work for a story like this, so I used it!