Siruis, Blond and With a Bladder Problem
When was the dratted plane EVER gonna stop? NEVER? Was that the answer? It looked that way... cause the damn thing hadn't even left the ground yet.Mabey Sirius was just impatient? Yes. Mabey cause he was in deep trouble? Yes. Mabey cause he was stuck between a rock and a hard place...? No.... but a good analogy. Cause currently, he was in a comfortable plane seat... being told to put on a damned seatbelt.
"Me? Put on a damned seatbelt... hell no.... not a chance of a snowball in hell am I going.. to." He muttered... while putting the seatbelt on. 'I have to pee' he thought suddenly. Well... this was bad cause the stewardess just told everyone to STAY SEATED. 'Like hell... I have to pee'.
He was just about to get up, when the plane started to move. He, being startled, fell on his butt again. 'Oh... I have to PEE.'
"Please fasten your safety belts, we are about to leave." 'Damn voice over the stupid intercom... don't they know that I have to PEE??!?' He just had to sit back and wait.
He had to go even more so, when a kid, who was around the age of ten, said suddenly, "Hey... dad? Did you know 'poop' is in the dictionary?"
This, of course didn't help Sirius, cause 'poop' is closely related to 'pee'.
HE was only on this plane cause he couldn't apparate. Carol... damn her.... thought it would be more 'fun' for 'Page' to go on the muggle contraption. Damn her... She new Page hated the long wait... for the damn muggle transportation. Unfortunatly, Sirius was the same way.
"LISTEN... DO YOU EVEN BELIEVE ME? CAUSE THE ONLY THING YOU'VE DONE THE WHOLE TIME WE WERE TALKING WAS MUTTER ABOUT CHICKENS!!!" Reggie yelled at her insane headmaster, who looked perplexed at her outburst.
"Mr. Petigrew!" He said unbelievingly.
"I'm Reggie sir.....Sorry professor." She muttered, suddenly feeling very small.
"I seriously think..." He began, but stopped to rethink what he was going to tell the disturbed little man. "I think you need something to ease your mind. Mabey a vacation? I'll talk to your gran, mabey she'll send you to the place you said Mr. Black was going to."
"I'M TELLING THE FRIGGIN TRUTH! Believe me? PLEASE?"
"I'm leaving now... write me about your vacation..." And he disappeared with a 'pop'.
"Damn him..."
James went down, ignoring the chicken... and openned the door. It was Lily and Remus. And suddenly, there was a thud in the living room and an 'Ow' from inside.
He smiled at his guests and Lily pushed her way into her house and up to her room... to discover that... *GASP* It was a disaster! Bras... underwear... dirty socks.... EVERYWHERE. Not to mention her favorite shirt and her favorite skirt.... on the FLOOR!
"You friggin b*st*rd! Why is my room all...all..." She was breathing hard and sending a death stare at herself....well... James... in her body. How dare he?
"Wow.... that's a record... even for you James." Remus's voice said from behind the three... who were assembled in front of the door to Lily's room.
"Liza!!" James said peering around Lily and Remus.
They too, turned and said a cheerful... "Hi Liza!" She didn't seem TOO surprised to see Lily and Remus there.
"Did you here?" James said suddenly... the ckicken was at his heals... it was following him EVERYWHERE. Liza shook her head. "Page's stepmom just up and moved to the states."
"Oh... that's great..." she said sarcastically. "Where is Page anyway?"
"Right here." PAGE said from behind them. "Carol... damn her..." She said.
"Hey Page..." Said James and Liza simultaniously.
"Hey peeps.... you guys left me in the car!" She said to Lily and Remus. they shrugged.
Suddenly there was a 'BOOM' in the living room and a scream... and then a *gobble*... then a "LILY!"... Which was screeched by a Petunia...
Then there was a curse and some footsteps... "Damn turkey... it's been following me all morning..." the voice of Peter grumbled.
"Reg!" exclaimed Liza.
"Liza!" Exclaimed Reggie. They smiled... but didn't hug... cause they looked like guys... which was VERY unnerving.
"Guess what?" Reggie said perkily...
"What?" they all coursed.
"Dumbledore talked to Pete's grama... cause i told him what happened and he told me i needed a vacation... so we're all going to the states!" She said smiling.
Sirius got off his plane. His ass hurt... cause when he was allowed to get up on the plane... it jerked and he fell on the floor... right on his ass...or Page's ass... But... it still hurt HIM.
He was NOT in a good mood. he saw Carol waving him over... cause they had fired Rosey.
He mumbled to himself while he walked over to 'the Bitch from Hell' and decided not to give her the satisfaction by saying his ass hurt. They got into the muggle car they were taking to Page's new home... Sirius looked around him... he'd never been to the states before...
They were going to live in Hollywood, California... joy... he was dying to were a bikkini. (I meant that sarcastically cause he's not a cross- dresser.)
When the car stopped... he looked up at a nice middle-class house. It was in a fair part of town... well... it wasn't run-down at least. Carol spoke for the first time during thier ride...
"I am sending you to a muggle summer-school program..." At this, Sirius choked and almost fell on his already hurt ass... Carol went on... "I think it will be a nice chance for you to meet new people in the neighborhood... and to keep out of my sight for a good part of the day..." 'Bitch...' Sirius thought savagly.
Sirius walked up to the house and openned the door. It was nicely furnished.... pretty. Light was shining through the windows and it smelt like flowers... the staircase was cool... it was suitable for sliding down the rails... He went to the kitchen... It was HUGE... Carol loved her kitchen space... even though she didn't exactly cook anything...
He went up to Page's new room... There was a bed.... and a desk..... but it was PINK. Everything was PINK. Even the paint was pink. He got this really horrified look on his face and turned around... quickly shutting his eyes and breathing deeply... 'This isn't happenning....'
the night of the wolf......thing
Liza sat.... waiting to see if anything happened.... it was the full moon and she was, after all... in a werewolf's body. She hated being anxious... which is what she was right now. She sighed and slumped on the floor... where she sat. If anything was gonna happen... it was gonna happen withing the next five minutes...
Remus was in the same situation... him and Lily had worked out that when the moon came up.... he would be locked in the shed by the pool. If anything did go wrong, he,and the Others would be safe... but that was and IF. Five minutes...
The first sign of something weird for Liza was a wierd tingling sensantion in the back of her neck. And then a very annoying pain in her arm and leg muscles. She could feel her back arching and a horrible pain spread throughout her whole body. She held back the urge to scream.
Unsimilar to Liza... Remus felt an odd feeling... which started at the tip of his temple... like something was trying to get in his skull.... no pain... strange... that wasn't what he was used to.
Liza sat down... she knew right when she fully transformed.... that she wasn't ALL wolf.... cause she still had the wits about her. And the pain, that was throughly explained in many dark arts books, wasn't that painfull.... mabey cause the 'wolf' itself didn't enter the body... 'Iwonder how Remus is doing...'
Remus, although going through a small amount of pain... wasn't at all very well. He was still in human form... although his mind was overpowered by the 'wolf'. It was bitter... and hungry. Luckly, the shed was pad-locked.
Liza walked over to the mirror. It was a full-lengthed mirror, and she could see a fully grown wolff starring back at her. Even though Remus was extremely handsome (according to her standards and she's secretly in love with him and he her.)... she thought he was kinda even more handsome as a massive wolf, as intimidating as it looked...
the next morning...
Remus woke up with a massive headache... And his nuckles were bleeding... or Liza's nuckles were bleeding. 'Oh... I'm so sorry Liza..." He thought before he got off the ground as Lily openned the door to the shed.
"What happened?" Lily said.... in a pitying voice.
"I... I don't know." Remus said... it was true, he couldn't remember what exactly had happened that night. (cause of the wolf)
"Your hands are bleeding... let me see them." Lily said extending her hands to touch the mutilated ones of Remus. He bit his lip as she touched the wounds... which were still red and wet.
Liza hadn't slept all night... she had sat there in front of the mirror for like ten minutes before starting to pace the room... She was really worried about Remus. FINALLY, the morning light showed through the window and she changed back... barely any pain at all. The first thing she did was get up and start writing to Remus about the night before.
a week later....
Snape sighed... he had just finished putting on his PINK nail polish... he was now applying a second coat to his toes... There was a tap at the wind, 'TAP', he got up and walked over to let the owl in... It had a letter. The letter was from his friend.... Lucius Malfoy.... who was an ignorrant jerk.... but he kept good company when someone as lonely as Snape... well.
Peter was jerked awake.... by himself... well... it was Reggie... but still... wouldn't you be startled if you were jerked awake by your body?
"Peter... did you even sit up while you were here?" Yelled a particularly anger Reggie...
There was empty food rappers and soda cans all over the place... "I got up..." Said Peter dismissively.
"Sure.. get up... we're going to America."
"What?"
"You heard... We're going on vacation... come on... I'll pack some of my things..."
"O... ok." Reggie started to pack her things... and Peter, being the simple- minded, stupid creature he is... took this time to digest this information.
Jack Potter sat at his kitchen table.... his wife was in the library... his kids... were standing.. pleading right before him...
"No."
"Please?"
"No."
He loved being the head of the house.
"It's just... all the way around the world daddy..." Jack raised his eyes at his 'daughter'.
"No... I have had you two away from my sight long enough... thanks." He said... referring to the kidnapping incident.
"DADDY! Don't be so... thick... America is probably safer then here anyway..." Remus said... his acting skills kicking in... HIS father wasn't even this over-protective... if you can call it that... cause it IS all the way around the world.
"Come on dad..." Lily said.. trying to help. "We're almost sixteen... it could be like an... early birthday present." She said... "Please?"
Puppy dog eyes... from both of his children... 'Awwwww' He always had a soft spot for that.
"Ok..."
"YES!" *high five*
"I can't come?" Orion whined.
"Ok... you can come." Page said... giving in to Sirius's older brother's antics.... which were sooo cute...
"Woo hoo... I'll pack."
"Hurry... we're leaving in like... two hours." She said checking her watch.
"Liza... tell my son he's in trouble when you get there... k?" Jerrid Lupin said.
"Ok... I will... just remember... this is all Sirius's fault k?" Liza said back.
"Ok ok..." She smiled and gave her temporary dad a hug....
"Your so cool... I wish MY dad was like that."
He smiled... "Thanks."
"Remus is really lucky to have a dad like you."
"Yes he is..." he said..." Oh... and I'll keep up our investigation of that potion k?"
"Ok... cool."
"Just have fun... k?"
"I will..."
"MOM... I need to be at the air port in.... and hour and fifty minutes..." James shouted.
"I'm coming... HOLD ON!"
'Jeez... PMS' He thought.
When was the dratted plane EVER gonna stop? NEVER? Was that the answer? It looked that way... cause the damn thing hadn't even left the ground yet.Mabey Sirius was just impatient? Yes. Mabey cause he was in deep trouble? Yes. Mabey cause he was stuck between a rock and a hard place...? No.... but a good analogy. Cause currently, he was in a comfortable plane seat... being told to put on a damned seatbelt.
"Me? Put on a damned seatbelt... hell no.... not a chance of a snowball in hell am I going.. to." He muttered... while putting the seatbelt on. 'I have to pee' he thought suddenly. Well... this was bad cause the stewardess just told everyone to STAY SEATED. 'Like hell... I have to pee'.
He was just about to get up, when the plane started to move. He, being startled, fell on his butt again. 'Oh... I have to PEE.'
"Please fasten your safety belts, we are about to leave." 'Damn voice over the stupid intercom... don't they know that I have to PEE??!?' He just had to sit back and wait.
He had to go even more so, when a kid, who was around the age of ten, said suddenly, "Hey... dad? Did you know 'poop' is in the dictionary?"
This, of course didn't help Sirius, cause 'poop' is closely related to 'pee'.
HE was only on this plane cause he couldn't apparate. Carol... damn her.... thought it would be more 'fun' for 'Page' to go on the muggle contraption. Damn her... She new Page hated the long wait... for the damn muggle transportation. Unfortunatly, Sirius was the same way.
"LISTEN... DO YOU EVEN BELIEVE ME? CAUSE THE ONLY THING YOU'VE DONE THE WHOLE TIME WE WERE TALKING WAS MUTTER ABOUT CHICKENS!!!" Reggie yelled at her insane headmaster, who looked perplexed at her outburst.
"Mr. Petigrew!" He said unbelievingly.
"I'm Reggie sir.....Sorry professor." She muttered, suddenly feeling very small.
"I seriously think..." He began, but stopped to rethink what he was going to tell the disturbed little man. "I think you need something to ease your mind. Mabey a vacation? I'll talk to your gran, mabey she'll send you to the place you said Mr. Black was going to."
"I'M TELLING THE FRIGGIN TRUTH! Believe me? PLEASE?"
"I'm leaving now... write me about your vacation..." And he disappeared with a 'pop'.
"Damn him..."
James went down, ignoring the chicken... and openned the door. It was Lily and Remus. And suddenly, there was a thud in the living room and an 'Ow' from inside.
He smiled at his guests and Lily pushed her way into her house and up to her room... to discover that... *GASP* It was a disaster! Bras... underwear... dirty socks.... EVERYWHERE. Not to mention her favorite shirt and her favorite skirt.... on the FLOOR!
"You friggin b*st*rd! Why is my room all...all..." She was breathing hard and sending a death stare at herself....well... James... in her body. How dare he?
"Wow.... that's a record... even for you James." Remus's voice said from behind the three... who were assembled in front of the door to Lily's room.
"Liza!!" James said peering around Lily and Remus.
They too, turned and said a cheerful... "Hi Liza!" She didn't seem TOO surprised to see Lily and Remus there.
"Did you here?" James said suddenly... the ckicken was at his heals... it was following him EVERYWHERE. Liza shook her head. "Page's stepmom just up and moved to the states."
"Oh... that's great..." she said sarcastically. "Where is Page anyway?"
"Right here." PAGE said from behind them. "Carol... damn her..." She said.
"Hey Page..." Said James and Liza simultaniously.
"Hey peeps.... you guys left me in the car!" She said to Lily and Remus. they shrugged.
Suddenly there was a 'BOOM' in the living room and a scream... and then a *gobble*... then a "LILY!"... Which was screeched by a Petunia...
Then there was a curse and some footsteps... "Damn turkey... it's been following me all morning..." the voice of Peter grumbled.
"Reg!" exclaimed Liza.
"Liza!" Exclaimed Reggie. They smiled... but didn't hug... cause they looked like guys... which was VERY unnerving.
"Guess what?" Reggie said perkily...
"What?" they all coursed.
"Dumbledore talked to Pete's grama... cause i told him what happened and he told me i needed a vacation... so we're all going to the states!" She said smiling.
Sirius got off his plane. His ass hurt... cause when he was allowed to get up on the plane... it jerked and he fell on the floor... right on his ass...or Page's ass... But... it still hurt HIM.
He was NOT in a good mood. he saw Carol waving him over... cause they had fired Rosey.
He mumbled to himself while he walked over to 'the Bitch from Hell' and decided not to give her the satisfaction by saying his ass hurt. They got into the muggle car they were taking to Page's new home... Sirius looked around him... he'd never been to the states before...
They were going to live in Hollywood, California... joy... he was dying to were a bikkini. (I meant that sarcastically cause he's not a cross- dresser.)
When the car stopped... he looked up at a nice middle-class house. It was in a fair part of town... well... it wasn't run-down at least. Carol spoke for the first time during thier ride...
"I am sending you to a muggle summer-school program..." At this, Sirius choked and almost fell on his already hurt ass... Carol went on... "I think it will be a nice chance for you to meet new people in the neighborhood... and to keep out of my sight for a good part of the day..." 'Bitch...' Sirius thought savagly.
Sirius walked up to the house and openned the door. It was nicely furnished.... pretty. Light was shining through the windows and it smelt like flowers... the staircase was cool... it was suitable for sliding down the rails... He went to the kitchen... It was HUGE... Carol loved her kitchen space... even though she didn't exactly cook anything...
He went up to Page's new room... There was a bed.... and a desk..... but it was PINK. Everything was PINK. Even the paint was pink. He got this really horrified look on his face and turned around... quickly shutting his eyes and breathing deeply... 'This isn't happenning....'
the night of the wolf......thing
Liza sat.... waiting to see if anything happened.... it was the full moon and she was, after all... in a werewolf's body. She hated being anxious... which is what she was right now. She sighed and slumped on the floor... where she sat. If anything was gonna happen... it was gonna happen withing the next five minutes...
Remus was in the same situation... him and Lily had worked out that when the moon came up.... he would be locked in the shed by the pool. If anything did go wrong, he,and the Others would be safe... but that was and IF. Five minutes...
The first sign of something weird for Liza was a wierd tingling sensantion in the back of her neck. And then a very annoying pain in her arm and leg muscles. She could feel her back arching and a horrible pain spread throughout her whole body. She held back the urge to scream.
Unsimilar to Liza... Remus felt an odd feeling... which started at the tip of his temple... like something was trying to get in his skull.... no pain... strange... that wasn't what he was used to.
Liza sat down... she knew right when she fully transformed.... that she wasn't ALL wolf.... cause she still had the wits about her. And the pain, that was throughly explained in many dark arts books, wasn't that painfull.... mabey cause the 'wolf' itself didn't enter the body... 'Iwonder how Remus is doing...'
Remus, although going through a small amount of pain... wasn't at all very well. He was still in human form... although his mind was overpowered by the 'wolf'. It was bitter... and hungry. Luckly, the shed was pad-locked.
Liza walked over to the mirror. It was a full-lengthed mirror, and she could see a fully grown wolff starring back at her. Even though Remus was extremely handsome (according to her standards and she's secretly in love with him and he her.)... she thought he was kinda even more handsome as a massive wolf, as intimidating as it looked...
the next morning...
Remus woke up with a massive headache... And his nuckles were bleeding... or Liza's nuckles were bleeding. 'Oh... I'm so sorry Liza..." He thought before he got off the ground as Lily openned the door to the shed.
"What happened?" Lily said.... in a pitying voice.
"I... I don't know." Remus said... it was true, he couldn't remember what exactly had happened that night. (cause of the wolf)
"Your hands are bleeding... let me see them." Lily said extending her hands to touch the mutilated ones of Remus. He bit his lip as she touched the wounds... which were still red and wet.
Liza hadn't slept all night... she had sat there in front of the mirror for like ten minutes before starting to pace the room... She was really worried about Remus. FINALLY, the morning light showed through the window and she changed back... barely any pain at all. The first thing she did was get up and start writing to Remus about the night before.
a week later....
Snape sighed... he had just finished putting on his PINK nail polish... he was now applying a second coat to his toes... There was a tap at the wind, 'TAP', he got up and walked over to let the owl in... It had a letter. The letter was from his friend.... Lucius Malfoy.... who was an ignorrant jerk.... but he kept good company when someone as lonely as Snape... well.
Peter was jerked awake.... by himself... well... it was Reggie... but still... wouldn't you be startled if you were jerked awake by your body?
"Peter... did you even sit up while you were here?" Yelled a particularly anger Reggie...
There was empty food rappers and soda cans all over the place... "I got up..." Said Peter dismissively.
"Sure.. get up... we're going to America."
"What?"
"You heard... We're going on vacation... come on... I'll pack some of my things..."
"O... ok." Reggie started to pack her things... and Peter, being the simple- minded, stupid creature he is... took this time to digest this information.
Jack Potter sat at his kitchen table.... his wife was in the library... his kids... were standing.. pleading right before him...
"No."
"Please?"
"No."
He loved being the head of the house.
"It's just... all the way around the world daddy..." Jack raised his eyes at his 'daughter'.
"No... I have had you two away from my sight long enough... thanks." He said... referring to the kidnapping incident.
"DADDY! Don't be so... thick... America is probably safer then here anyway..." Remus said... his acting skills kicking in... HIS father wasn't even this over-protective... if you can call it that... cause it IS all the way around the world.
"Come on dad..." Lily said.. trying to help. "We're almost sixteen... it could be like an... early birthday present." She said... "Please?"
Puppy dog eyes... from both of his children... 'Awwwww' He always had a soft spot for that.
"Ok..."
"YES!" *high five*
"I can't come?" Orion whined.
"Ok... you can come." Page said... giving in to Sirius's older brother's antics.... which were sooo cute...
"Woo hoo... I'll pack."
"Hurry... we're leaving in like... two hours." She said checking her watch.
"Liza... tell my son he's in trouble when you get there... k?" Jerrid Lupin said.
"Ok... I will... just remember... this is all Sirius's fault k?" Liza said back.
"Ok ok..." She smiled and gave her temporary dad a hug....
"Your so cool... I wish MY dad was like that."
He smiled... "Thanks."
"Remus is really lucky to have a dad like you."
"Yes he is..." he said..." Oh... and I'll keep up our investigation of that potion k?"
"Ok... cool."
"Just have fun... k?"
"I will..."
"MOM... I need to be at the air port in.... and hour and fifty minutes..." James shouted.
"I'm coming... HOLD ON!"
'Jeez... PMS' He thought.