Sirius felt himself slam back to earth. He woke up to see people staring at him. People in Hogwarts uniforms. He sat up. It had worked.

As he walked around the school, he couldn't help thinking how breezy it felt in his nether-regions. He reached down to scratch his leg.

Wait a second. My arse isn't that big, is it? When he was sure nobody was looking, he felt it a bit. That arse is NOT mine. He shook it off.

As he passed one of the many school mirrors, completely out of habit, he glanced at his reflection. And nearly fainted at what he saw. He wasn't Sirius Black any more. He was a gorgeous, busty, sixteen-year-old girl with dark eyes and waste-length black hair. And he was wearing a skirt.

He turned around to a passing student and asked, "What's my name?"

"Jamie……………" said the girl slowly.

Jamie? And I'm a girl? Really, God, this is the best joke you've played on me. You make me a woman, so I can't sleep with who I would want to, and you give me my best friend's name. Really funny.

Sirius instantly felt as if he had been hit in the head with a frying pan. Great. I suppose that's the punishment for blasphemy.

Sirius spent a good five minutes raving and cursing, while students made very large circles to get around him. Not him, Sirius. It's her, and you're now Jamie.

He felt a sharp swat on his bottom and spun around. A seventh year was looking at him rather suggestively. He marched over to the offender and, instead of slapping him (as was probably costumary for girls), he socked the seventh year in the jaw. A hand flew up the the guy's face, and when it was pulled back, there was blood.

"Don't you ever touch me again," Sirius hissed. "got it?"

The seventh year nodded, still stunned at what had just happened. Sirius marched off and slammed into the girls' bathroom. He stood for several moments, hands on a sink.

"Hello."

Sirius looked up to see an old man looking out of the mirror. "Now that last bit of blasphemy reallly wasn't necessary, Jamie," the man said, looking down his nose. "But I suppose I owe you an explaination."

"Yes, you do," Sirius---er, Jamie said.

"When I said I wanted you back down on earth, I explained that we couldn't get your old body. So we would send you down secretly, to act as a student in Harry's year."

"I know that," Jamie said, rather sarcastically.

"My mistake was letting you choose what to look like. So I found a loophole. You asked to keep your hair, and then your eyes, and your skin complexion, assuming that would make you look like your sixteen-year-old self. But due to the fact that there are more than students in Hogwarts, I couldn't do that. And I realized you said nothing about that fact that you wanted to be a guy."

Sirius opened and closed his mouth several times. Dammitshitfuck! He swore silently.

"I gave you the female equivalent of yourself."

"But I'm lesbian," Sirius squeaked, looking down at the sink again.

"Oh, no you're not. I gave you the usual female impulses."

Sirius looked back up at the mirror. The man was gone. He was alone. Dammit, he swore, my makeup is smeared!

(A/N: Okay, to those of you who are confused (like me) I'm going to switch to Sirius' POV)

I stopped for a moment. Dammit, that shithead was right, I have female impulses (and is is just me, or does it feel like He's glaring down at me?)

Lifted eyeliner to my face, and paused. I looked at a girl next to me, who was deftly smearing her own makeup on. The other girl grabbed her bag and left. I turned back to the mirror and tried to immitate her movements. When I stood back to look at what I'd done to my face, I sighed. Well, it's not that bad, just slightly smudged. I'll come up with an excuse if somebody notices, and practice later.

@%@%@%@%@%@%@%@%@

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter, or anything else in the plot-line.

A/N: Okay, I'm know I'm going mess this up and make Sirius (and possibly Remus) seem a bit gay. With a plot like this, it's bound to happen by accident (considering Sirius has turned into a girl). Erm……………they AREN'T!! Thank you!!