To Save the World from Mary-Sues
Part 2
-
-
"So...We meet again. You have had much time to make a list of suspects-"
-
"Actually, Touga, you gave us thirty minutes before you dragged us from our
dorms again.--"
-
"Hmph. Thirty minutes isn't enough for you, Tenjou?"
-
"No and apparently it wasn't enough time for you to change out of the bunny
suit, Saionji."
-
It is very early in the morning and the members of the Student Council
(and Utena) are seated once more around the Patio Table of World's End-
Utena: It has a name? --
Hanako: Um...No, but I didn't want to just call it the table.
Utena: Even Chuchu could have come up with a better name.
Anthy: - What a good idea! [to Chuchu, who is standing on her shoulder]
What should we call it Chuchu?
Chuchu: [contemplates deeply] ....
Anthy: -
Chuchu:....
Anthy: - -
Chuchu:....
Anthy: - - -
Chuchu: .....
Anthy: - - - -
Chuchu: ...[a light bulb appears above his head] clears throat dramatically
'Chu'!
Anthy: - That's a good name, Chuchu.
Chuchu: [beams proudly]
Hanako: ...Okay. The 'Chu' it is.
It is very early in the morning and the members of the Student Council
(and Utena) are seated once more around the 'Chu'.
Nanami is wearing the lilac colored nightgown she wears practically every
night (XX), Juri is wearing her usual white nightgown, Miki is wearing
powder blue pajama shirt and pants, Utena is wearing her usual striped
pajama top and pants, Anthy is wearing her usual night gown and cap...... and
Saionji is wearing pink bunny pajamas with little bunny slippers. Touga is
the only one wearing the student council uniform.
-
-
Miki: [clicks his stopwatch] So...How shall this be done, President Kirryu?
Touga: We shall go one at a time and read our list of possible Mary-Sues.
Juri shall go first.
Miki: [clicks his stopwatch]
Juri: [to Touga] [sarcastically] Thank you. [unfolds a piece of paper
that was in her hand] [begins to read her list] My first-
Miki: [clicks his stopwatch]
Juri: ...My first sus-
Miki: [clicks stopwatch]
Juri: -- ...My-
Miki: [clicks stopwatch]
Juri: M-
Miki: [clicks stopwatch]
Juri:-
Miki: [clicks stopwatch]
Juri: -- ... [quickly] My first suspe-
Miki: [clicks stopwatch] [clicks stopwatch] [clicks stopwatch]
Juri: [controls temper] .... Why don't you go first, Miki.
Miki: - [politely] Oh no, Miss Juri, I couldn't do that. It is rude to
interrupt. -
Juri: Really, Miki.
Touga: - Now, now, Juri, you shouldn't be mad at Miki, he is just
being polite.
Juri: -- Shut up, Kirryu.
Touga: I love you too, Juri.
Juri: ...[chooses to ignore Touga] [focuses on her list again] My first
suspect is-
Miki: [clicks his stopwatch]
Juri: ...My first [snatches the stopwatch from Miki]-
Miki: Hey. Give it back! That is important to me! That and my Shinning
Thing. - -
Juri: -- [threateningly] I'll make you see many 'shinning things' if you
don't let me finish.
Miki: -;; Okay.
Juri: As I was saying, my first suspect-actually suspects are .... The
Shadow Girls. Where did they come from? They most certainly were not in
the manga.
Utena: Neither was Shiori.
Juri: [stands from her seat] [emotional outburst] LEAVE SHIORI OUT OF
THIS, TENJOU!
Student Council (and Utena): 00...
Juri: [sits back down] [regains her composure] Um...Back to what I was
saying- The Shadow Girls appeared out of nowhere, that is why I think
that they are Mary-Sues.
Touga: You're just mad about the time they used a pouty child who was too
sick to go on a field trip as a metaphor for you.
Juri: ...My second suspect is... ... Anthy.
Nanami: I don't like Anthy.
Utena: - You're just in denial, Nanami. I've seen the fanfics.
Miki: [muses] I've never seen a Nanami/Shiori before...
Nanami: [wails] Not again!
Juri: [defensively] Of course you haven't, Miki, Shiori would never do
something like that.
Shiori: appears out of nowhere Hm... Actually it would depend on how much
money she offered me. vanishes
Juri: [stares numbly ahead] ....
Nanami: H-How disgusting.
Touga: Hm... Juri? What are you doing?
Juri: [is counting the money in her wallet] ! [puts her wallet away]
Nothing that should concern you, Kirryu. [changes subject] My next
suspect is ... [trying to think of one] .... ...
Touga: Yes? Your next suspect is...?
Juri: [still can't think of one] Um...
Juri's anonymous roommate: [appears] Well- It's definitely not Shiori-I
mean- what moron would like any one as vile as her?
Juri: ... - My next suspect is .
Touga: ?
Juri: - Yes, .
Chuchu: Chu?
Juri: - No- .
Utena: ? Who's that?
Juri: - My anonymous roommate.
Utena: ... -- I'm sure this doesn't come as shocking news to you, Juri,
but we all hate your roommate, so there is no way she is a Mary-Sue.
Juri: Hey, I can wish can't I?
Touga: [pats Juri consolingly on the shoulder] Don't worry, Juri, next
year you might be lucky enough to be my roommate.
Juri: But you're a guy.
Touga: sigh Juri- I know you are going through a little lesbian phase
but-
Juri: -- That's not what I meant- I meant that the school wouldn't allow
for a male and a female to stay in the same room.
Touga: It doesn't matter. I have 'special' connections with Akio. [winks]
-
Juri: -- As does Anthy and any thing at this school that moves.
Anthy: - - Actually, Juri, my brother doesn't mind if it's immobile.
Juri: ...I think I'm going to be sick.
Miki: [ponders out loud] I've never seen a Akio/Leather sofa pairing
before...
Juri: ... [gets up from her seat and leaves]
Touga: ...How about you, Nanami? Who are your suspects?
Nanami: My suspects are-
A loud screaming voice comes from off-stage
Voice: NOOOO!! SCRIPT FORMAT!!!!
Nanami: --... I suspect-
From off screen runs an anonymous girl (no- not the roommate)
Girl: points at the student council (and Utena) I shall report you
all!!!
Touga: For what, may I ask?
Girl: It should be illegal!!!
Nanami: Hey! It's not my fault that Utena's a gay/lesbian series so
don't go interrupting me!
Utena: If it offends you- just don't read it.
Anthy: - - -
Chuchu: [with conviction] Chu!
Girl: SCRIPT FORMAT MUST DIE!!!!
Touga: Script format?
Girl: [grabs a nearby chair and throws it off the balcony] GAAAAHHH!
A voice comes from below the balcony
Voice: Ow! That hurt!
Girl: [looks below the balcony] -;; Sorry. [back to the Utena cast]
You just don't have enough brains to write a real one!!! [runs off
screen]
Touga: ... [to Nanami] Continue please.
Nanami: [pulls out a huge stack of paper with small print font] Okay,
big brother. [begins reading off the names] Kozue, Keiko, Sakura, Lyn,
Evi, Miko, Makoto, Iris, Jenny, Mandy, Alice, Yoko, Yuka-
Two years later
Nanami: Suzuko, Konohako, Suzuki, Tsuki, Ai, Hana, Josie, Hoshiko and
Rumiko. Yes, they all just have to be Mary-Sues.
Miki: [goes to click his stop watch, but remembers that it's with Juri]
Um... -;; Nanami?
Nanami: Yes, Miki?
Miki: Aren't those all girls that Touga had gone out with?
Nanami: Hmph. I don't know what you're talking about, Miki.
Touga: It's your turn, Miki.
Miki: Well...I- I just couldn't think of any. I mean- all of the students at
this school are nice. -
Other student council members (and Utena): ...
Nanami: What hole have you been living in, Miki?
Miki: - Sorry. Um- maybe Wakaba or Mitsuru?
Nanami and Utena: No way!
Nanami: How could you, Miki? Mitsuru is too gullible to be a Mary-Sue –and
Wakaba gets on my nerves.
Utena: Miki, there is no way that it's Wakaba or Mitsuru- they all have
flaws.
Miki: I'm sorry- I really don't know who to suspect.
Everyone freezes
Shadow girl 1 and 2: [appear] Do you know? Do you know? Do you really
know?
Shadow girl 1: [dressed up in a detective uniform] They say that it's
possible for aliens to be all around us! So I shall set out and exterminate
them all!
Shadow Girl 2: [dressed up as a little girl] Are you sure that'll work,
sir?
Shadow Girl 1: Of course it shall work! How dare you doubt me! I even have
a list of suspects! There's my nosy neighbor Sue, there's the clerk at the
grocery store, Officer Bob-
Shadow Girl 2: -But- what will you do when you find one?
Shadow Girl 1: Hush up now, young lady. I'm busy-
Shadow Girl 2: But, sir-
Shadow Girl 1: There's my boss, the ice cream man, the bill collector, that
annoying telemarketer-
scene goes back to normal
Utena: I'm not quite sure... I'd have to think about it for a while.
Saionji: Of course, you would, Tenjou. It might take you some time to come
up with someone to pass the blame onto though.
Utena: Huh?
Touga: Please, clarify.
Mitsuru enters the room to stand beside Nanami
Saionji: Well, I'd have to say that my number one suspect is Utena Tenjou.
A game of beach volleyball begins in the background
Utena: What?
Saionji: I know you're good at it, but don't play stupid, Tenjou.
Utena: I don't know what you are talking about.
Nanami: [isn't paying attention] [snaps her fingers in the air] Mitsuru!
Mitsuru: - Yes, Miss Nanami?
Nanami: Get me a glass of water, Mitsuru, I'm very thirsty.
Mitsuru: - Right away, Miss Nanami. [walk aways]
Utena: -Are you crazy, Saionji?!
Saionji: Don't you all find it a bit unusual how everyone seems to like
her?
Nanami: I don't like her at all!
Miki: [muses] I've never seen a Nanami/Ute-
Nanami: Don't start that again, Miki. --
Miki: -;; Sorry.
Back to Mitsuru
Mitsuru: [walks back with a glass of ice water]
A beach ball rolls in front of him
High-pitched, feminine voice: Could you please get that for me, sir?
Mitsuru: [picks up the ball and throws it back]
Girl with the feminine voice: [catches the ball] Thank you so much. [walks
up to Mitsuru] What's your name?
The girl is a longhaired, slender, brunette, with thick eyelashes and
bright blue eyes. She is currently wearing a light yellow gingham dress
with brown mary-jane dress shoes. Her hair is tied back in yellow-ribboned
ponytail.
Author's note: No! Don't fall for it, Mitsuru! Don't tell her your name!
Mitsuru: [stares blankly for a moment] ... - Mitsuru. What is yours, Miss?
Girl: [frowns] Well-um- My initials are M.S.Y-so my friends call me Missy.
-
Mitsuru: - That's a cute name.
Girl: [blushes falsely] Why thank you, Mitsuru. I just have a feeling that
we'll be super-good friends [stares into his eyes] [her eyes glow blue]
–right?
Mitsuru: Super-good friends... Super-good friends...
Girl: [laughs maniacally] Bwahahahaha-er- I mean- Tee hee! - How
terrific. Come with me, Mitsuru. - [walks into the building and enters
the elevator]
Mitsuru: [Follows after her] Super-good friends... Super-good
friends...
Back to Utena and co.
Touga: [holds up a score card that reads "3" ] That's three points so far
for Utena.
The student counsel (Yes, Juri has returned) (and Utena) are all surfing
the Internet on lap tops
Touga: Find me a Shiori/Juri.
Juri: [almost instantly] [clicks the 'send fic to a friend button'] Got
one!
Touga: [holds up a four] Found that one quick, huh Juri?
Juri: ... Just tell us the next one Kirryu. --
Touga: Okay. Touga/Saionji.
Nanami: Wh-What?!
Saionji: Found it!
Touga: [holds up a card that reads '2'] Better catch up, Saionji. -
Nanami: [pouty] What does this have to do with Mary-Sues, anyway – and
where's Mitsuru?
Anthy: Right here, Miss Nanami!
Nanami: [looks at Anthy] Where? I don't see him.
Anthy: [is reading the text on her screen] [giggles] - My goodness, you
are here too, Miss Nanami.
Nanami: What foolishness are you spouting off?
Utena: It's a Nanami/Mitsuru pairing, Nanami.
Nanami: [numb] ...[turns bright red] What?!
Saionji: [sneers] Has it ever occurred to you that all of the pairings we
mentioned with you in it so far has you as "seme".
Nanami: I don't know what a "seme" is so leave me alone.
Anthy: [calmly] - You don't know what a seme is, Miss Nanami? A seme is
the one on top. -
Nanami: On top of what- ... [turns bright red] Oo- You! –Where's that
Nanami/Mitsuru fic?
Anthy: - Hold on. I'll send it to you. [clicks the send button]
Nanami: [clicks on the link and begins to read it] [turns bright red-
again]
Touga: My-my, Nanami. I didn't know that you felt so strongly for him. -
Nanami: I-I don't, big brother! [fake evil smile] [lies] I was just going
to give them a really bad review! [continues to read it] –Oh- By the way-
where is Mitsuru?
Utena: I'm not sure. [sips tea]
Anthy: - I know where he went Miss Nanami.
Miki: I've never seen a Juri/Miki fic- no wait- I have. -;;
Juri: [eyes widen a bit] ...
Touga: Hey. This is a little bit off topic, but- why is Juri having so many
OOC moments?
Anthy: Hm...Maybe it was something she ate. -
Nanami: Or someone.
Everyone: OO
Nanami: Hey! Can't I be OOC sometimes?
Touga: [is watching the female beach volley ball players] [sips tea] I
suppose so.
Utena: I think Arisugawa-san is being used as comedy relief. -;;
Several tea cups fall from the counsel members grasps and shatter on the
floor
Nanami: [shocked] Juri? As comedic relief? [folds her arms over her chest]
Hey- wait a minute! There are no stressful points in this fic to be
relieved of! I think we should complain to the author!
Juri: [sips tea] [calmly] ...Whatever happened to Mitsuru, Nanami?
Nanami: And why is this fic in script format? That's the reason why that
crazy girl came! I- Mitsuru! I almost forgot!
Utena: -- You did forget, Nanami.
Nanami: Who asked you, Tenjou. [back to topic of Mitsuru] Where did he go,
Himemiya?
Anthy: He went into the elevator-
Nanami: Okay. Good that's what he was supposed to do-
Anthy: -With a girl.
Phantom of The Opera music plays
Juri:...Kirryu.
Touga: [turns off the red boombox in his lap] Sorry, Miss Arisugawa, it was
to-
Juri: [arches an eyebrow] [finishes] Keep away the Mary-Sues?
Touga: Exactly.
-
-
-
-
-
-
Author's note: Oh no! Poor Mitsuru! Finally this fic is slowly-
kinda-sorta-in a way-but- not really getting somewhere! As you can see- I
like having the characters discuss fanfics. If any of you are okay with me
mentioning any of your Utena fics in this (don't worry, the mention won't
be insulting, I'm a human being, not a... super-meanie-meanie person) please
tell me in your review. I can't mention them all (I just might though- If
you let me- of course), but I will do my best to mention 1 or 2.
Thanks for mentioning Juri's OOCness. I did a lot of it on purpose, but I'm
going to cool it down a bit, because Juri is just that cool. - P.S. I
love all your Utena fan fics. They make me feel so bad for Juri, and
sometimes even Shiori. The one with Kozue/Nanami was pretty original .
I read your fic "Happy White Day, Saionji!". It was really sweet. I used to
completely dislike him, but now I see him in a slightly different light. I
can be really stubborn when I don't like a character too! Good job on the
fic and thank you for recommending it to me. -
In answer to who asked me if there really was a Chuchu/Akio fic- there
isn't any- yet- I do plan on writing one (it's mostly a comedy though).
I know, Chuchu's pretty funny. That's one of the reasons I look forward to
my comedy with Chuchu/Akio.
Thanks for your review, if it weren't for those of you who were nice enough
to drop me a line I probably wouldn't have continued it.
Note to all: When that one girl (the one screaming about script format)
came in, I wasn't jabbing at any of you. You all have been so sweet and
tolerant. - TTTT Unfortuantely, a friend of mine didn't have so nice
of an experience (they had her temporarily and illegitimately suspended
from fanfic.net!) so that was my own way of showing my upset. Though I do
understand why most people do not even bother reading script formats, I
myself plan on becoming a writer for young adult fiction. The reason why I
tend to write script format for fanfics is because it does not take up too
much of my occupational writing time. I do plan on making it up to all of
you by writing a short novel format Utena fic though. Thank you so much for
being so good to me. - Ja ne and good luck to your futures! -
Part 2
-
-
"So...We meet again. You have had much time to make a list of suspects-"
-
"Actually, Touga, you gave us thirty minutes before you dragged us from our
dorms again.--"
-
"Hmph. Thirty minutes isn't enough for you, Tenjou?"
-
"No and apparently it wasn't enough time for you to change out of the bunny
suit, Saionji."
-
It is very early in the morning and the members of the Student Council
(and Utena) are seated once more around the Patio Table of World's End-
Utena: It has a name? --
Hanako: Um...No, but I didn't want to just call it the table.
Utena: Even Chuchu could have come up with a better name.
Anthy: - What a good idea! [to Chuchu, who is standing on her shoulder]
What should we call it Chuchu?
Chuchu: [contemplates deeply] ....
Anthy: -
Chuchu:....
Anthy: - -
Chuchu:....
Anthy: - - -
Chuchu: .....
Anthy: - - - -
Chuchu: ...[a light bulb appears above his head] clears throat dramatically
'Chu'!
Anthy: - That's a good name, Chuchu.
Chuchu: [beams proudly]
Hanako: ...Okay. The 'Chu' it is.
It is very early in the morning and the members of the Student Council
(and Utena) are seated once more around the 'Chu'.
Nanami is wearing the lilac colored nightgown she wears practically every
night (XX), Juri is wearing her usual white nightgown, Miki is wearing
powder blue pajama shirt and pants, Utena is wearing her usual striped
pajama top and pants, Anthy is wearing her usual night gown and cap...... and
Saionji is wearing pink bunny pajamas with little bunny slippers. Touga is
the only one wearing the student council uniform.
-
-
Miki: [clicks his stopwatch] So...How shall this be done, President Kirryu?
Touga: We shall go one at a time and read our list of possible Mary-Sues.
Juri shall go first.
Miki: [clicks his stopwatch]
Juri: [to Touga] [sarcastically] Thank you. [unfolds a piece of paper
that was in her hand] [begins to read her list] My first-
Miki: [clicks his stopwatch]
Juri: ...My first sus-
Miki: [clicks stopwatch]
Juri: -- ...My-
Miki: [clicks stopwatch]
Juri: M-
Miki: [clicks stopwatch]
Juri:-
Miki: [clicks stopwatch]
Juri: -- ... [quickly] My first suspe-
Miki: [clicks stopwatch] [clicks stopwatch] [clicks stopwatch]
Juri: [controls temper] .... Why don't you go first, Miki.
Miki: - [politely] Oh no, Miss Juri, I couldn't do that. It is rude to
interrupt. -
Juri: Really, Miki.
Touga: - Now, now, Juri, you shouldn't be mad at Miki, he is just
being polite.
Juri: -- Shut up, Kirryu.
Touga: I love you too, Juri.
Juri: ...[chooses to ignore Touga] [focuses on her list again] My first
suspect is-
Miki: [clicks his stopwatch]
Juri: ...My first [snatches the stopwatch from Miki]-
Miki: Hey. Give it back! That is important to me! That and my Shinning
Thing. - -
Juri: -- [threateningly] I'll make you see many 'shinning things' if you
don't let me finish.
Miki: -;; Okay.
Juri: As I was saying, my first suspect-actually suspects are .... The
Shadow Girls. Where did they come from? They most certainly were not in
the manga.
Utena: Neither was Shiori.
Juri: [stands from her seat] [emotional outburst] LEAVE SHIORI OUT OF
THIS, TENJOU!
Student Council (and Utena): 00...
Juri: [sits back down] [regains her composure] Um...Back to what I was
saying- The Shadow Girls appeared out of nowhere, that is why I think
that they are Mary-Sues.
Touga: You're just mad about the time they used a pouty child who was too
sick to go on a field trip as a metaphor for you.
Juri: ...My second suspect is... ... Anthy.
Nanami: I don't like Anthy.
Utena: - You're just in denial, Nanami. I've seen the fanfics.
Miki: [muses] I've never seen a Nanami/Shiori before...
Nanami: [wails] Not again!
Juri: [defensively] Of course you haven't, Miki, Shiori would never do
something like that.
Shiori: appears out of nowhere Hm... Actually it would depend on how much
money she offered me. vanishes
Juri: [stares numbly ahead] ....
Nanami: H-How disgusting.
Touga: Hm... Juri? What are you doing?
Juri: [is counting the money in her wallet] ! [puts her wallet away]
Nothing that should concern you, Kirryu. [changes subject] My next
suspect is ... [trying to think of one] .... ...
Touga: Yes? Your next suspect is...?
Juri: [still can't think of one] Um...
Juri's anonymous roommate: [appears] Well- It's definitely not Shiori-I
mean- what moron would like any one as vile as her?
Juri: ... - My next suspect is .
Touga: ?
Juri: - Yes, .
Chuchu: Chu?
Juri: - No- .
Utena: ? Who's that?
Juri: - My anonymous roommate.
Utena: ... -- I'm sure this doesn't come as shocking news to you, Juri,
but we all hate your roommate, so there is no way she is a Mary-Sue.
Juri: Hey, I can wish can't I?
Touga: [pats Juri consolingly on the shoulder] Don't worry, Juri, next
year you might be lucky enough to be my roommate.
Juri: But you're a guy.
Touga: sigh Juri- I know you are going through a little lesbian phase
but-
Juri: -- That's not what I meant- I meant that the school wouldn't allow
for a male and a female to stay in the same room.
Touga: It doesn't matter. I have 'special' connections with Akio. [winks]
-
Juri: -- As does Anthy and any thing at this school that moves.
Anthy: - - Actually, Juri, my brother doesn't mind if it's immobile.
Juri: ...I think I'm going to be sick.
Miki: [ponders out loud] I've never seen a Akio/Leather sofa pairing
before...
Juri: ... [gets up from her seat and leaves]
Touga: ...How about you, Nanami? Who are your suspects?
Nanami: My suspects are-
A loud screaming voice comes from off-stage
Voice: NOOOO!! SCRIPT FORMAT!!!!
Nanami: --... I suspect-
From off screen runs an anonymous girl (no- not the roommate)
Girl: points at the student council (and Utena) I shall report you
all!!!
Touga: For what, may I ask?
Girl: It should be illegal!!!
Nanami: Hey! It's not my fault that Utena's a gay/lesbian series so
don't go interrupting me!
Utena: If it offends you- just don't read it.
Anthy: - - -
Chuchu: [with conviction] Chu!
Girl: SCRIPT FORMAT MUST DIE!!!!
Touga: Script format?
Girl: [grabs a nearby chair and throws it off the balcony] GAAAAHHH!
A voice comes from below the balcony
Voice: Ow! That hurt!
Girl: [looks below the balcony] -;; Sorry. [back to the Utena cast]
You just don't have enough brains to write a real one!!! [runs off
screen]
Touga: ... [to Nanami] Continue please.
Nanami: [pulls out a huge stack of paper with small print font] Okay,
big brother. [begins reading off the names] Kozue, Keiko, Sakura, Lyn,
Evi, Miko, Makoto, Iris, Jenny, Mandy, Alice, Yoko, Yuka-
Two years later
Nanami: Suzuko, Konohako, Suzuki, Tsuki, Ai, Hana, Josie, Hoshiko and
Rumiko. Yes, they all just have to be Mary-Sues.
Miki: [goes to click his stop watch, but remembers that it's with Juri]
Um... -;; Nanami?
Nanami: Yes, Miki?
Miki: Aren't those all girls that Touga had gone out with?
Nanami: Hmph. I don't know what you're talking about, Miki.
Touga: It's your turn, Miki.
Miki: Well...I- I just couldn't think of any. I mean- all of the students at
this school are nice. -
Other student council members (and Utena): ...
Nanami: What hole have you been living in, Miki?
Miki: - Sorry. Um- maybe Wakaba or Mitsuru?
Nanami and Utena: No way!
Nanami: How could you, Miki? Mitsuru is too gullible to be a Mary-Sue –and
Wakaba gets on my nerves.
Utena: Miki, there is no way that it's Wakaba or Mitsuru- they all have
flaws.
Miki: I'm sorry- I really don't know who to suspect.
Everyone freezes
Shadow girl 1 and 2: [appear] Do you know? Do you know? Do you really
know?
Shadow girl 1: [dressed up in a detective uniform] They say that it's
possible for aliens to be all around us! So I shall set out and exterminate
them all!
Shadow Girl 2: [dressed up as a little girl] Are you sure that'll work,
sir?
Shadow Girl 1: Of course it shall work! How dare you doubt me! I even have
a list of suspects! There's my nosy neighbor Sue, there's the clerk at the
grocery store, Officer Bob-
Shadow Girl 2: -But- what will you do when you find one?
Shadow Girl 1: Hush up now, young lady. I'm busy-
Shadow Girl 2: But, sir-
Shadow Girl 1: There's my boss, the ice cream man, the bill collector, that
annoying telemarketer-
scene goes back to normal
Utena: I'm not quite sure... I'd have to think about it for a while.
Saionji: Of course, you would, Tenjou. It might take you some time to come
up with someone to pass the blame onto though.
Utena: Huh?
Touga: Please, clarify.
Mitsuru enters the room to stand beside Nanami
Saionji: Well, I'd have to say that my number one suspect is Utena Tenjou.
A game of beach volleyball begins in the background
Utena: What?
Saionji: I know you're good at it, but don't play stupid, Tenjou.
Utena: I don't know what you are talking about.
Nanami: [isn't paying attention] [snaps her fingers in the air] Mitsuru!
Mitsuru: - Yes, Miss Nanami?
Nanami: Get me a glass of water, Mitsuru, I'm very thirsty.
Mitsuru: - Right away, Miss Nanami. [walk aways]
Utena: -Are you crazy, Saionji?!
Saionji: Don't you all find it a bit unusual how everyone seems to like
her?
Nanami: I don't like her at all!
Miki: [muses] I've never seen a Nanami/Ute-
Nanami: Don't start that again, Miki. --
Miki: -;; Sorry.
Back to Mitsuru
Mitsuru: [walks back with a glass of ice water]
A beach ball rolls in front of him
High-pitched, feminine voice: Could you please get that for me, sir?
Mitsuru: [picks up the ball and throws it back]
Girl with the feminine voice: [catches the ball] Thank you so much. [walks
up to Mitsuru] What's your name?
The girl is a longhaired, slender, brunette, with thick eyelashes and
bright blue eyes. She is currently wearing a light yellow gingham dress
with brown mary-jane dress shoes. Her hair is tied back in yellow-ribboned
ponytail.
Author's note: No! Don't fall for it, Mitsuru! Don't tell her your name!
Mitsuru: [stares blankly for a moment] ... - Mitsuru. What is yours, Miss?
Girl: [frowns] Well-um- My initials are M.S.Y-so my friends call me Missy.
-
Mitsuru: - That's a cute name.
Girl: [blushes falsely] Why thank you, Mitsuru. I just have a feeling that
we'll be super-good friends [stares into his eyes] [her eyes glow blue]
–right?
Mitsuru: Super-good friends... Super-good friends...
Girl: [laughs maniacally] Bwahahahaha-er- I mean- Tee hee! - How
terrific. Come with me, Mitsuru. - [walks into the building and enters
the elevator]
Mitsuru: [Follows after her] Super-good friends... Super-good
friends...
Back to Utena and co.
Touga: [holds up a score card that reads "3" ] That's three points so far
for Utena.
The student counsel (Yes, Juri has returned) (and Utena) are all surfing
the Internet on lap tops
Touga: Find me a Shiori/Juri.
Juri: [almost instantly] [clicks the 'send fic to a friend button'] Got
one!
Touga: [holds up a four] Found that one quick, huh Juri?
Juri: ... Just tell us the next one Kirryu. --
Touga: Okay. Touga/Saionji.
Nanami: Wh-What?!
Saionji: Found it!
Touga: [holds up a card that reads '2'] Better catch up, Saionji. -
Nanami: [pouty] What does this have to do with Mary-Sues, anyway – and
where's Mitsuru?
Anthy: Right here, Miss Nanami!
Nanami: [looks at Anthy] Where? I don't see him.
Anthy: [is reading the text on her screen] [giggles] - My goodness, you
are here too, Miss Nanami.
Nanami: What foolishness are you spouting off?
Utena: It's a Nanami/Mitsuru pairing, Nanami.
Nanami: [numb] ...[turns bright red] What?!
Saionji: [sneers] Has it ever occurred to you that all of the pairings we
mentioned with you in it so far has you as "seme".
Nanami: I don't know what a "seme" is so leave me alone.
Anthy: [calmly] - You don't know what a seme is, Miss Nanami? A seme is
the one on top. -
Nanami: On top of what- ... [turns bright red] Oo- You! –Where's that
Nanami/Mitsuru fic?
Anthy: - Hold on. I'll send it to you. [clicks the send button]
Nanami: [clicks on the link and begins to read it] [turns bright red-
again]
Touga: My-my, Nanami. I didn't know that you felt so strongly for him. -
Nanami: I-I don't, big brother! [fake evil smile] [lies] I was just going
to give them a really bad review! [continues to read it] –Oh- By the way-
where is Mitsuru?
Utena: I'm not sure. [sips tea]
Anthy: - I know where he went Miss Nanami.
Miki: I've never seen a Juri/Miki fic- no wait- I have. -;;
Juri: [eyes widen a bit] ...
Touga: Hey. This is a little bit off topic, but- why is Juri having so many
OOC moments?
Anthy: Hm...Maybe it was something she ate. -
Nanami: Or someone.
Everyone: OO
Nanami: Hey! Can't I be OOC sometimes?
Touga: [is watching the female beach volley ball players] [sips tea] I
suppose so.
Utena: I think Arisugawa-san is being used as comedy relief. -;;
Several tea cups fall from the counsel members grasps and shatter on the
floor
Nanami: [shocked] Juri? As comedic relief? [folds her arms over her chest]
Hey- wait a minute! There are no stressful points in this fic to be
relieved of! I think we should complain to the author!
Juri: [sips tea] [calmly] ...Whatever happened to Mitsuru, Nanami?
Nanami: And why is this fic in script format? That's the reason why that
crazy girl came! I- Mitsuru! I almost forgot!
Utena: -- You did forget, Nanami.
Nanami: Who asked you, Tenjou. [back to topic of Mitsuru] Where did he go,
Himemiya?
Anthy: He went into the elevator-
Nanami: Okay. Good that's what he was supposed to do-
Anthy: -With a girl.
Phantom of The Opera music plays
Juri:...Kirryu.
Touga: [turns off the red boombox in his lap] Sorry, Miss Arisugawa, it was
to-
Juri: [arches an eyebrow] [finishes] Keep away the Mary-Sues?
Touga: Exactly.
-
-
-
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Author's note: Oh no! Poor Mitsuru! Finally this fic is slowly-
kinda-sorta-in a way-but- not really getting somewhere! As you can see- I
like having the characters discuss fanfics. If any of you are okay with me
mentioning any of your Utena fics in this (don't worry, the mention won't
be insulting, I'm a human being, not a... super-meanie-meanie person) please
tell me in your review. I can't mention them all (I just might though- If
you let me- of course), but I will do my best to mention 1 or 2.
Thanks for mentioning Juri's OOCness. I did a lot of it on purpose, but I'm
going to cool it down a bit, because Juri is just that cool. - P.S. I
love all your Utena fan fics. They make me feel so bad for Juri, and
sometimes even Shiori. The one with Kozue/Nanami was pretty original .
I read your fic "Happy White Day, Saionji!". It was really sweet. I used to
completely dislike him, but now I see him in a slightly different light. I
can be really stubborn when I don't like a character too! Good job on the
fic and thank you for recommending it to me. -
In answer to who asked me if there really was a Chuchu/Akio fic- there
isn't any- yet- I do plan on writing one (it's mostly a comedy though).
I know, Chuchu's pretty funny. That's one of the reasons I look forward to
my comedy with Chuchu/Akio.
Thanks for your review, if it weren't for those of you who were nice enough
to drop me a line I probably wouldn't have continued it.
Note to all: When that one girl (the one screaming about script format)
came in, I wasn't jabbing at any of you. You all have been so sweet and
tolerant. - TTTT Unfortuantely, a friend of mine didn't have so nice
of an experience (they had her temporarily and illegitimately suspended
from fanfic.net!) so that was my own way of showing my upset. Though I do
understand why most people do not even bother reading script formats, I
myself plan on becoming a writer for young adult fiction. The reason why I
tend to write script format for fanfics is because it does not take up too
much of my occupational writing time. I do plan on making it up to all of
you by writing a short novel format Utena fic though. Thank you so much for
being so good to me. - Ja ne and good luck to your futures! -