CLASSIFIED DOCUMENT: TOP SECRET TRANSCRIPTS OF OVAL OFFICE SECURITY CAM DATED 04-07-2004

AGENT: "Mr. President, we have a problem. NASA is on the phone, an unidentified projectile crashed on the East Coast."

PRESIDENT: "What is it?"

AGENT: "It's unidentified sir. It has symbols on it sir, so we know it was sent here by sentient beings."

PRESIDENT: "Martians?"

AGENT: "I don't think so sir."

PRESIDENT: "What's it made of?"

AGENT: "We aren't sure sir.

PRESIDENT: "Are you sure it's not Martians? I've seen the MI5 reports from Tony Blair, I know they exist."

British Security Service

AGENT: "Very well sir."

PRESIDENT: "Give it to me straight. What's the damage?"

AGENT: "The first reports are saying heavy casualties and property damage."

PRESIDENT: "Damn. Where'd this happen? You said East Coast. Is it close?"

AGENT: "New Jersey sir. A small town outside of Atlantic City called Point Cove."

PRESIDENT: "Goddamn. Me and Jeb were gonna hit the casinos this weekend."

AGENT: "What is your order sir?"

PRESIDENT: "sighs I don't know. Can we get the M.I.B.?"

(M)en (I)n (B)lack

AGENT: "I'll see what can be done sir."