Disclaimer: None of the characters belong to us! If they did you would
never have heard of them because we don't possess the unique writing
abilities of J.R.R. Tolkien. Please don't sue!
Epilogue
Silence.
Aragorn lay face down on the floor. "You're dead," he told himself sternly. "You're never going to become King of Gondor, you're never going to marry Arwen, Legolas is never going to teach you how to use hair-straighteners, Gimli will never teach you how to surf! In fact you're never going to any of the things you wanted to do before you're ninety! You're a disgrace!"
"Ummmm.....Aragorn?"
"Go away!" Aragorn mumbled, "Can't you see I'm trying to be dead here!"
"Aragorn? Why are you lying on the floor?"
"Legolas? Oh no they got you too! You're dead Legolas. Don't you realize it! Oh well, at least I won't be alone."
"Aragorn I'm pretty sure I'm alive! Just because I'm having a bad hair day, doesn't usually classify me as dead!"
"But......But Merry and Pippin killed you! And they killed me!"
"Ok you've got concussion, I'll come back later."
"No....don't leave me!" said Aragorn feebly, raising his hand towards the direction the voice was coming from.
"Errrr....."
At this point Aragorn decided to look around him, expecting to see white shores and silver glass. But no........all he saw was the corridor, in the west wing, in Rivendell, in the valley of Imladris, in the misty mountains, in the north, in Middle-Earth, in the world, in the solar system, in the galaxy, in the universe.
"I'm not dead." He said with disbelief, "I'm not dead! I'M NOT DEAD! IN YOUR FACE MERRY AND PIPPIN! YOU LIKE MANY OTHERS BEFORE YOU," his voice echoing through the halls, "YOU HAVE FAILED TO KILL THE RANGER DUDE!!!!!!" he listened to the echo fade, "Crap that was not meant to sound so corny."
"What happened?" quizzed Pippin, "Where's the big bang?"
"Well you've missed it by about 50 million years Pip!" retorted Merry, then seeing the confuse look on Pippin's face said, "Well I don't know, do I?!"
"You must have wired it up wrong," Pippin said wringing his hands in frustration.
"You were the one who did the wiring!" yelled Merry, "Go find out what went wrong!" he gave Pippin a little push towards the door.
"Don't be hasty, Master Meriadoc!" said Pippin, grinning a cheeky grin.
Merry growled at him and Pippin took it as his cue to leave.
"What happened to you?" asked Legolas as he helped Aragorn up.
"I dunno," said Aragorn dusting off his ranger outfit, "I tripped....."
He turned around to see what in fact he had fallen over. Legolas saw comprehension dawn all over his friend's face. Following Aragorn's gaze he spotted a very large and important looking cable lying, unplugged across the corridor.
Aragorn, upon falling over it, had pulled it out of its socket, therefore foiling Merry and Pippin's evil plan.
"Hello!" said a cheery voice from over Aragorn's shoulder.
"Oh so that's what went wrong!" cried Pippin hurrying forward and sticking the plug back into position, "Right, now I can go back to Merry and we'll get on with the show!"
Turning away to walk back the way he had come, he called behind him, "Hey! Shouldn't you guys be outside?"
Aragorn yelled to him, "Pippin, I'm really sorry about this!" Then he snatched the tiny hand mirror from Legolas, who had been holding it throughout the entire thing. He launched it through the air towards Pippin's head, and even before it hit home, he knew the aim was true.
Bonk!
Pippin fell like a stone being dropped into a well.
"One down, one to go!" said Aragorn looking quite gleeful. His eyes then fell on Legolas, who was standing, looking quite distraught, over his mirror which had been shattered into tiny pieces.
"My mirror!" he sobbed. "My beautiful mirror! Broken! That's seven years bad luck, I hope you know!"
"Oh calm down! I'll get you a new one!"
"A BIGGER one!"
"Ok, a bigger one."
"That one!" screamed Legolas, like a spoilt child, pointing to the large mirror that hung on the wall down the corridor.
"Fine! That one!" sighed Aragorn exasperatedly walking over to Pippin's lifeless body. "Meanwhile we have to find Merry and put an end to this escapade!"
The horses were packed they were ready to leave. Aragorn was in a particularly good mood. That morning he had woken to find Elrond racing around, doing 360s in his wheel chair and screaming, "THEY'RE LEAVING TODAY! THEY'RE LEAVING TODAY! THEY....ARE...... LEAVING!!!!!"
The elf lord had attempted to yell, jump up and down, scream and generally tell off Merry and Pippin but nothing he could do or say would make the slightest bit of change in their behavior.
On the hobbits' command Aragorn had constructed a plaque to go in place of the mirror which he had nicked for Legolas.
It read:
THE TEN COMMANDMENTS OF RULE BREAKING
Thy shalt use embarrassment to crush thy enemy
Thy must reveal thy enemy's secrets
Beauty is thy key to all evil
Thou shall use things pink and fluffy
Remember animals are thy's best friend
Let thy senses guide you
If thou makes it bigger thou makes it better
Make thy enemy pay by disillusion
Thou must have fun while performing pranks
Thou shall not get caught!
If you follow these you will be great masters of mayhem!
By Meriadoc Brandybuck and Peregrine Took
"So, you guys are finished then?" asked Frodo, as the party rode away
from the valley of Imladris.
"Well," said Merry thoughtfully, "We're only taking a little break at the
moment. We'll never retire completely!"
"Besides," cut in Pippin, "We aren't even completely finished here, you
see we left Elrond a little parting gift." Merry and Pippin grinned their
evil grins.
From three miles away Elrond's screams were heard by Merry and Pippin.
"Merry!" said Pippin suddenly coming up beside his cousin, "Merry!"
"Umm?" said Merry still grinning broadly.
"Merry," smirked Pippin, "Do you think we should have told Elrond we're
coming down for Christmas?"
A.N That's all folks! The road goes ever on and on with our other fic,
(be warned it ain't as good, we wrote it when we were little girls of
twelve!)
Here at last the fellowship is ended and we are left to tell the tale
so....... Smell you later!
Thorney
&
Sweetdeath04
Epilogue
Silence.
Aragorn lay face down on the floor. "You're dead," he told himself sternly. "You're never going to become King of Gondor, you're never going to marry Arwen, Legolas is never going to teach you how to use hair-straighteners, Gimli will never teach you how to surf! In fact you're never going to any of the things you wanted to do before you're ninety! You're a disgrace!"
"Ummmm.....Aragorn?"
"Go away!" Aragorn mumbled, "Can't you see I'm trying to be dead here!"
"Aragorn? Why are you lying on the floor?"
"Legolas? Oh no they got you too! You're dead Legolas. Don't you realize it! Oh well, at least I won't be alone."
"Aragorn I'm pretty sure I'm alive! Just because I'm having a bad hair day, doesn't usually classify me as dead!"
"But......But Merry and Pippin killed you! And they killed me!"
"Ok you've got concussion, I'll come back later."
"No....don't leave me!" said Aragorn feebly, raising his hand towards the direction the voice was coming from.
"Errrr....."
At this point Aragorn decided to look around him, expecting to see white shores and silver glass. But no........all he saw was the corridor, in the west wing, in Rivendell, in the valley of Imladris, in the misty mountains, in the north, in Middle-Earth, in the world, in the solar system, in the galaxy, in the universe.
"I'm not dead." He said with disbelief, "I'm not dead! I'M NOT DEAD! IN YOUR FACE MERRY AND PIPPIN! YOU LIKE MANY OTHERS BEFORE YOU," his voice echoing through the halls, "YOU HAVE FAILED TO KILL THE RANGER DUDE!!!!!!" he listened to the echo fade, "Crap that was not meant to sound so corny."
"What happened?" quizzed Pippin, "Where's the big bang?"
"Well you've missed it by about 50 million years Pip!" retorted Merry, then seeing the confuse look on Pippin's face said, "Well I don't know, do I?!"
"You must have wired it up wrong," Pippin said wringing his hands in frustration.
"You were the one who did the wiring!" yelled Merry, "Go find out what went wrong!" he gave Pippin a little push towards the door.
"Don't be hasty, Master Meriadoc!" said Pippin, grinning a cheeky grin.
Merry growled at him and Pippin took it as his cue to leave.
"What happened to you?" asked Legolas as he helped Aragorn up.
"I dunno," said Aragorn dusting off his ranger outfit, "I tripped....."
He turned around to see what in fact he had fallen over. Legolas saw comprehension dawn all over his friend's face. Following Aragorn's gaze he spotted a very large and important looking cable lying, unplugged across the corridor.
Aragorn, upon falling over it, had pulled it out of its socket, therefore foiling Merry and Pippin's evil plan.
"Hello!" said a cheery voice from over Aragorn's shoulder.
"Oh so that's what went wrong!" cried Pippin hurrying forward and sticking the plug back into position, "Right, now I can go back to Merry and we'll get on with the show!"
Turning away to walk back the way he had come, he called behind him, "Hey! Shouldn't you guys be outside?"
Aragorn yelled to him, "Pippin, I'm really sorry about this!" Then he snatched the tiny hand mirror from Legolas, who had been holding it throughout the entire thing. He launched it through the air towards Pippin's head, and even before it hit home, he knew the aim was true.
Bonk!
Pippin fell like a stone being dropped into a well.
"One down, one to go!" said Aragorn looking quite gleeful. His eyes then fell on Legolas, who was standing, looking quite distraught, over his mirror which had been shattered into tiny pieces.
"My mirror!" he sobbed. "My beautiful mirror! Broken! That's seven years bad luck, I hope you know!"
"Oh calm down! I'll get you a new one!"
"A BIGGER one!"
"Ok, a bigger one."
"That one!" screamed Legolas, like a spoilt child, pointing to the large mirror that hung on the wall down the corridor.
"Fine! That one!" sighed Aragorn exasperatedly walking over to Pippin's lifeless body. "Meanwhile we have to find Merry and put an end to this escapade!"
The horses were packed they were ready to leave. Aragorn was in a particularly good mood. That morning he had woken to find Elrond racing around, doing 360s in his wheel chair and screaming, "THEY'RE LEAVING TODAY! THEY'RE LEAVING TODAY! THEY....ARE...... LEAVING!!!!!"
The elf lord had attempted to yell, jump up and down, scream and generally tell off Merry and Pippin but nothing he could do or say would make the slightest bit of change in their behavior.
On the hobbits' command Aragorn had constructed a plaque to go in place of the mirror which he had nicked for Legolas.
It read:
THE TEN COMMANDMENTS OF RULE BREAKING
Thy shalt use embarrassment to crush thy enemy
Thy must reveal thy enemy's secrets
Beauty is thy key to all evil
Thou shall use things pink and fluffy
Remember animals are thy's best friend
Let thy senses guide you
If thou makes it bigger thou makes it better
Make thy enemy pay by disillusion
Thou must have fun while performing pranks
Thou shall not get caught!
If you follow these you will be great masters of mayhem!
By Meriadoc Brandybuck and Peregrine Took
"So, you guys are finished then?" asked Frodo, as the party rode away
from the valley of Imladris.
"Well," said Merry thoughtfully, "We're only taking a little break at the
moment. We'll never retire completely!"
"Besides," cut in Pippin, "We aren't even completely finished here, you
see we left Elrond a little parting gift." Merry and Pippin grinned their
evil grins.
From three miles away Elrond's screams were heard by Merry and Pippin.
"Merry!" said Pippin suddenly coming up beside his cousin, "Merry!"
"Umm?" said Merry still grinning broadly.
"Merry," smirked Pippin, "Do you think we should have told Elrond we're
coming down for Christmas?"
A.N That's all folks! The road goes ever on and on with our other fic,
(be warned it ain't as good, we wrote it when we were little girls of
twelve!)
Here at last the fellowship is ended and we are left to tell the tale
so....... Smell you later!
Thorney
&
Sweetdeath04