Chapter 6
" . . . He wakes up to the sound, So scared the she's leaving . . ."
Ron felt the weight beside him remove itself from the bed.
'Wait!' he thought. 'Don't go! I can't live without you.' But he forced himself to stay sill and let her go.
Only moving when he heard the door close behind her, he sat up and rubbed his eyes. Everything inside of him told him that he had just made a mistake. But what had been his mistake? He loved Hermione more than anything. He wanted to show her how much he loved her. But a voice inside his heart told him that sleeping with her was wrong, that there was another way.
* . . . he wishes she were still asleep next to him . . . *
Why did sex have to make everything so complicated? He put his clothes on with frustration. Everything was fine until they'd taken it a step further. He didn't know what to do about anything anymore. All he could do was wait for her to make a move and decide what they should do next.
* . . . hoping she will change . . . *
Hermione was in the bathroom splashing cold water on her face. She'd been wrong. Sleeping with Ron again hadn't helped anything at all; everything was worse now. Now she felt twice as guilty, twice as shamed, twice as scared that she might lose him.
A walk outside would make her feel better, she decided, and made her way down to the lake.
* . . . In my mind . . . *
Hermione refused to cry as she sat under the tree, watching the Giant Squid. All she had to do was think about what to do, that was the logical thing. But hadn't logic failed her this time? Sleeping with Ron had been logical, but that hadn't helped her. She was so absorbed in her thoughts she didn't hear someone else approaching.
"Hello, Hermione," said a cheery voice.
"Hello, Emily," said Hermione.
"Are you all right?" Emily Harrisford was a Hufflepuff sixth year and reputed to be the nicest, kindest, most trustworthy person in the school.
"No," said Hermione. Emily quietly put her arms around her; Hermione still refused to cry.
"Can I help?" Emily asked. Apparently, the rumors about her were true.
Hermione thought for a moment. 'Hell with it,' she thought. 'I need answers.' "Have you ever had sex?" she asked the girl.
Emily started and blushed. "No," she said. "Why do you ask?"
"Well, um, can you keep a secret?"
"Of course," said Emily. She was concerned for Hermione.
"Er, Ron and I, we slept together last night," now Hermione blushed. "And I just fell so . . . guilty. And ashamed and scared. I mean, everything was going so well before, but now, in just one day, it's all falling apart. I don't know what to do, how to make it better. Or what went wrong," her emotions started to get the better of her and tears pooled behind her eyelids. Emily wrapped her in a warm hug. They sat in silence for a moment. Hermione was the first to speak.
"Do you know what happened?" she asked.
Emily bit her lip and nodded.
"Well? Please tell me, I need to fix it. I can't stand this."
Cautiously, Emily began to speak. "I think it was a mistake for you and Ron to have sex."
"But we love each other. How could it be wrong for us to express our love?"
* . . . Everything we did was right . . . *
"Because," said Emily slowly, carefully choosing her words, "sex is not the ultimate expression of love. Love is supposed to be a lifetime commitment to each other."
Hermione opened her mouth to say something, but Emily held up her hand, silently asking Hermione to let her finish.
"Sex is something so intimate, so special. It's two people becoming one, the binding of souls. Marriage is what gives sex the guarantee of those souls not being ripped apart again."
Hermione thought of her fear of losing Ron.
"I was once reading a muggle book that said that sexual drives are strong, but only marriage is strong enough to contain them," Emily explained.
"So having sex with Ron was wrong because we're not married?" Hermione wanted to make sure she understood.
Emily nodded. "Wouldn't you feel better if you knew he would never leave you, that you were already bound together for eternity?"
Hermione nodded.
* . . . Open your eyes . . . *
"But what am I supposed to do now?" she asked.
"Well," said Emily, "my advice would first be to talk to Ron. He may be feeling the same way. Second, stop having sex. Wait for that guarantee. Don't set yourself up for heart break."
"Thank you, Emily," said Hermione as she stood up.
"No problem," said Emily. "I know it's not the most popular viewpoint, but it's served me well."
Hermione smiled at Emily and went up to the castle to find Ron.
A/N: I think I'm going to lose some readers with this chapter. If you want to flame, go ahead. I plan to respond to any question or comments by posting my own review on the review page. So keep your eyes open! Review please! I hope y'all aren't too mad at me.
" . . . He wakes up to the sound, So scared the she's leaving . . ."
Ron felt the weight beside him remove itself from the bed.
'Wait!' he thought. 'Don't go! I can't live without you.' But he forced himself to stay sill and let her go.
Only moving when he heard the door close behind her, he sat up and rubbed his eyes. Everything inside of him told him that he had just made a mistake. But what had been his mistake? He loved Hermione more than anything. He wanted to show her how much he loved her. But a voice inside his heart told him that sleeping with her was wrong, that there was another way.
* . . . he wishes she were still asleep next to him . . . *
Why did sex have to make everything so complicated? He put his clothes on with frustration. Everything was fine until they'd taken it a step further. He didn't know what to do about anything anymore. All he could do was wait for her to make a move and decide what they should do next.
* . . . hoping she will change . . . *
Hermione was in the bathroom splashing cold water on her face. She'd been wrong. Sleeping with Ron again hadn't helped anything at all; everything was worse now. Now she felt twice as guilty, twice as shamed, twice as scared that she might lose him.
A walk outside would make her feel better, she decided, and made her way down to the lake.
* . . . In my mind . . . *
Hermione refused to cry as she sat under the tree, watching the Giant Squid. All she had to do was think about what to do, that was the logical thing. But hadn't logic failed her this time? Sleeping with Ron had been logical, but that hadn't helped her. She was so absorbed in her thoughts she didn't hear someone else approaching.
"Hello, Hermione," said a cheery voice.
"Hello, Emily," said Hermione.
"Are you all right?" Emily Harrisford was a Hufflepuff sixth year and reputed to be the nicest, kindest, most trustworthy person in the school.
"No," said Hermione. Emily quietly put her arms around her; Hermione still refused to cry.
"Can I help?" Emily asked. Apparently, the rumors about her were true.
Hermione thought for a moment. 'Hell with it,' she thought. 'I need answers.' "Have you ever had sex?" she asked the girl.
Emily started and blushed. "No," she said. "Why do you ask?"
"Well, um, can you keep a secret?"
"Of course," said Emily. She was concerned for Hermione.
"Er, Ron and I, we slept together last night," now Hermione blushed. "And I just fell so . . . guilty. And ashamed and scared. I mean, everything was going so well before, but now, in just one day, it's all falling apart. I don't know what to do, how to make it better. Or what went wrong," her emotions started to get the better of her and tears pooled behind her eyelids. Emily wrapped her in a warm hug. They sat in silence for a moment. Hermione was the first to speak.
"Do you know what happened?" she asked.
Emily bit her lip and nodded.
"Well? Please tell me, I need to fix it. I can't stand this."
Cautiously, Emily began to speak. "I think it was a mistake for you and Ron to have sex."
"But we love each other. How could it be wrong for us to express our love?"
* . . . Everything we did was right . . . *
"Because," said Emily slowly, carefully choosing her words, "sex is not the ultimate expression of love. Love is supposed to be a lifetime commitment to each other."
Hermione opened her mouth to say something, but Emily held up her hand, silently asking Hermione to let her finish.
"Sex is something so intimate, so special. It's two people becoming one, the binding of souls. Marriage is what gives sex the guarantee of those souls not being ripped apart again."
Hermione thought of her fear of losing Ron.
"I was once reading a muggle book that said that sexual drives are strong, but only marriage is strong enough to contain them," Emily explained.
"So having sex with Ron was wrong because we're not married?" Hermione wanted to make sure she understood.
Emily nodded. "Wouldn't you feel better if you knew he would never leave you, that you were already bound together for eternity?"
Hermione nodded.
* . . . Open your eyes . . . *
"But what am I supposed to do now?" she asked.
"Well," said Emily, "my advice would first be to talk to Ron. He may be feeling the same way. Second, stop having sex. Wait for that guarantee. Don't set yourself up for heart break."
"Thank you, Emily," said Hermione as she stood up.
"No problem," said Emily. "I know it's not the most popular viewpoint, but it's served me well."
Hermione smiled at Emily and went up to the castle to find Ron.
A/N: I think I'm going to lose some readers with this chapter. If you want to flame, go ahead. I plan to respond to any question or comments by posting my own review on the review page. So keep your eyes open! Review please! I hope y'all aren't too mad at me.