Chapter 7
". . . I'll still be by your side . . . "
She found him in the common room, staring into the fire. He looked up when he heard her approach.
"Hi," he said.
"Hi," she said. "We need to talk."
"Yeah," he said. "We do." Ron stood, stretching himself to his full height. Hermione felt her hear give a little flutter. She was still very much in love with him.
They sat across form each other in armchairs. Most people saw the seriousness of their conversation and steered clear of them.
Hermione began the conversation. "I think we made a mistake," she said quietly. Ron nodded his head. "It's just that I've had these feelings. I feel so . . . " she struggled with the words.
"Guilty," Ron supplied. "Shamed. Unfulfilled. Scared." I've been feeling it, too."
Hermione let out a sigh of relief. At least she wouldn't have to explain those things to him. "What do you think we should do?" she asked.
"I don't know," he said. He smiled sardonically. "No one ever told me about his part it."
"Me either," she said. "I think we should stop."
"Stop what?" Roan asked, but he was pretty sure eh already knew the answer.
"Stop spending the night together."
Ron nodded. But his eyes still held a question. "Don't you want to?" he asked. "Didn't feel good?"
Hermione took his hand. "Of course I want to," she said. "It was the most physically mind-blowing thing I've ever experienced. But . . . it's just not worth it. It's not worth all this pain I'm causing myself."
"I understand," said Ron. "So," he sighed, "how do we go about this? Because honestly, Hermione," he said softly, brushing a lock of hair out of her face, "I don't know if I can stay away from you now. I know how sweet you taste, how soft you feel," he punctuated his words with a kiss, "how beautiful you are when you're asleep. I think not being with you would drive me mad."
"Me, too," she whispered.
"So what do we do?" he asked his face still breathlessly close to hers.
"Well," said Hermione, becoming very business-like, despite the quickness of her breath. "We have to slow the progression of our relationship. Not stop it, just slow it down a bit. We don't put ourselves in situations to be tempted. We have to . . . distance . . . ourselves from each other." Hermione swallowed. That had been hard to say.
Ron frowned. "Are you saying we shouldn't see each other anymore?"
"No!" Hermione cried. "No, that's not what I'm saying at all. I just think we shouldn't spend all of our time with each other. Especially not alone together. Think about it, when was the last time you spent some quality time with Harry? Or Dean or Seamus? I know I've been neglecting my girlfriends for awhile. Feels like I haven't talked to Ginny in forever. Do you know what I'm saying?"
"I think so," said Ron. "Like if we're not going to go all the way, why make it harder by going everywhere but?"
"Exactly," said Hermione relieved. She had been afraid he wouldn't understand.
"I understand, Hermione, but it's not going to be easy."
"I know. But we have to do this. For both our sakes."
"I know," said Ron, looking into the fire. He suddenly looked up into Hermione's eyes and smiled. "I love you," he said.
Hermione smiled back. "I love you, too," she leaned over and kissed him. "Now we have to go to bed, our own beds. Classes tomorrow."
Ron grimaced. "Did you have to remind me?"
"Yes. Now go to bed." They both stood up. Ron softly kissed her again.
"Good night, Hermione," he said. "I love you."
"I love you, too, Ron."
*How could I ever have been so blind? You give me something to sleep to at night*
A/N: Sorry it took so long for me to update! I've had a lot of stuff going on and this chapter was just really hard to write. I don't know why. I still don't think it's as good as it should be, but I can't figure out how to make it better. Thanks to all of you for your kind reviews! They mean a lot to me! Please review! The next chapter will be up quicker, I promise!
". . . I'll still be by your side . . . "
She found him in the common room, staring into the fire. He looked up when he heard her approach.
"Hi," he said.
"Hi," she said. "We need to talk."
"Yeah," he said. "We do." Ron stood, stretching himself to his full height. Hermione felt her hear give a little flutter. She was still very much in love with him.
They sat across form each other in armchairs. Most people saw the seriousness of their conversation and steered clear of them.
Hermione began the conversation. "I think we made a mistake," she said quietly. Ron nodded his head. "It's just that I've had these feelings. I feel so . . . " she struggled with the words.
"Guilty," Ron supplied. "Shamed. Unfulfilled. Scared." I've been feeling it, too."
Hermione let out a sigh of relief. At least she wouldn't have to explain those things to him. "What do you think we should do?" she asked.
"I don't know," he said. He smiled sardonically. "No one ever told me about his part it."
"Me either," she said. "I think we should stop."
"Stop what?" Roan asked, but he was pretty sure eh already knew the answer.
"Stop spending the night together."
Ron nodded. But his eyes still held a question. "Don't you want to?" he asked. "Didn't feel good?"
Hermione took his hand. "Of course I want to," she said. "It was the most physically mind-blowing thing I've ever experienced. But . . . it's just not worth it. It's not worth all this pain I'm causing myself."
"I understand," said Ron. "So," he sighed, "how do we go about this? Because honestly, Hermione," he said softly, brushing a lock of hair out of her face, "I don't know if I can stay away from you now. I know how sweet you taste, how soft you feel," he punctuated his words with a kiss, "how beautiful you are when you're asleep. I think not being with you would drive me mad."
"Me, too," she whispered.
"So what do we do?" he asked his face still breathlessly close to hers.
"Well," said Hermione, becoming very business-like, despite the quickness of her breath. "We have to slow the progression of our relationship. Not stop it, just slow it down a bit. We don't put ourselves in situations to be tempted. We have to . . . distance . . . ourselves from each other." Hermione swallowed. That had been hard to say.
Ron frowned. "Are you saying we shouldn't see each other anymore?"
"No!" Hermione cried. "No, that's not what I'm saying at all. I just think we shouldn't spend all of our time with each other. Especially not alone together. Think about it, when was the last time you spent some quality time with Harry? Or Dean or Seamus? I know I've been neglecting my girlfriends for awhile. Feels like I haven't talked to Ginny in forever. Do you know what I'm saying?"
"I think so," said Ron. "Like if we're not going to go all the way, why make it harder by going everywhere but?"
"Exactly," said Hermione relieved. She had been afraid he wouldn't understand.
"I understand, Hermione, but it's not going to be easy."
"I know. But we have to do this. For both our sakes."
"I know," said Ron, looking into the fire. He suddenly looked up into Hermione's eyes and smiled. "I love you," he said.
Hermione smiled back. "I love you, too," she leaned over and kissed him. "Now we have to go to bed, our own beds. Classes tomorrow."
Ron grimaced. "Did you have to remind me?"
"Yes. Now go to bed." They both stood up. Ron softly kissed her again.
"Good night, Hermione," he said. "I love you."
"I love you, too, Ron."
*How could I ever have been so blind? You give me something to sleep to at night*
A/N: Sorry it took so long for me to update! I've had a lot of stuff going on and this chapter was just really hard to write. I don't know why. I still don't think it's as good as it should be, but I can't figure out how to make it better. Thanks to all of you for your kind reviews! They mean a lot to me! Please review! The next chapter will be up quicker, I promise!