Mmm hotdogs are the best thing mankind ever created; I can never eat over three of those babies! Oh yeah ya wanna know 'bout the rest of my day. Ok um where was I? Oh yeah…ahem.

"I know of a place." The injured Chris mumbled to me as his head lolled to rest roughly on top of my head.

A church. Of all the places to go he chooses a church.

Walking in I have to keep in the laughter when I don't burst into flames from crossin' the threshold.

I remember as a child attendin' church, listening to the preacher preach on and on about things I didn't understand at the time. Back then I had a strong faith. But now…well to put it simply, me and God ain't on speakin' terms.

My friend Punch may seem like an idiot at times but the guy has a brain somewhere in that thick skull of his. He once said to me, 'The god of your youth isn't the same as the god of your maturity.'

As I looked around the large steeple, the saints and apostles, the candles and the big organ before casting my eyes to the cross encircled over the stained glass window and the only feeling going through me at the moment was emptiness, I can only say that never had truer words been spoken.

"Ya okay?" I asked looking towards my tried Red his body sheen with sweat as the poison was being flushed out of his system with lots of fresh purified water all costing me about eight bucks at the gas station we passed.

He removed the large bottle of water from his mouth, "Fine." He bit back.

The little bastard had the nerve to still be mad at me! Well if he was then so was I.

Turning away from him I glared back towards the front with the crucifix and let my mind wonder. If Christ had been hanged would people be walkin' around with nooses around their necks? Um…makes ya wonder.

For awhile we sat in the pews just staring ahead at nothing really just mentally cursing each other. When I saw that he was no longer sweating and was breathing rather normal I stood, "Alright let's go."

"What for?" He asked his voice still a bit irritated.

"Thought I'm not the most religious person in all of Gotham even I have respect for others. If we stay they'll find us eventually and when they do all hell breaks loose! Plus wreaking a church would make us look downright bad even to the lowdown pickpockets."

We quickly walked out and began heading down the street with nowhere in particular in mind to go just yet. We had those people to take care of, and after that I had to bust Chris in his head for his attitude.

"You're not comfortable in churches, why's that?" Chris asked breakin' the six minutes of a very very uncomfortable silence between us.

I shrugged. "Lost my faith awhile ago. I feel…cheap takin' refuge there. I did a search once on the internet awhile ago when I felt it slipping and I had a small chat with a retired clergy man. He said somewhere in the middle of his career he lost his but couldn't get out, so he had to keep it up, givin' comfort and preachin' a word he no longer believed in until he retired. Sorta ironic ain't it?"

There goes that silence again, it's very nerve wreakin'. "What about you?" I asked giving in first this time.

"Huh?"

"I said what about you and your faith?"

"Um I still have it, just not the same as I did as a kid. You know I sorta miss the devotion I had as a child."

"Don't we all."

We continued on our way walking in silence, we couldn't go home just yet; something just had to be done about those pesky people. What the hell did we do to them that justify them hunting us down?

Yeah yeah I know I've held a few people hostage, injured them, made them laugh uncontrollably with laughing gas, assaulted, insulted, dressed up, put in dangerous situations, and killed a few in large a large explosion or they died when they inhaled my Joker Venom…but that didn't give them the right. Hey I'm not innocent but can I be blamed when people don't move their asses fast enough?

"So are ya feelin' any better?" I asked.

"Yeah. Did you get a count of how many we're dealing with?"

"Four."

"Two each."

"Were should we go duke it out?" I asked takin' a quick look around us; no doubt those guys weren't far behind.

Whenever my lovely dovey strawberry is thinkin' of somethin' wicked, he get the most devious smirk on his face and his eyes are completely frightening. It sends a yummy scrumpdelicious shiver down my spine every single time I see it. Oh if we weren't fighting at the moment I'da been all over him.

Gotham Reservoir. Isn't anything that this damn city doesn't have? At six minutes to twelve the place was practically empty with only a few java injected souls manning the nightshift. I don't know why but the night shift is far more fun to play with than the day.

"No."

"What?" I demanded my hands still curled around my gun which had yet to be properly used for the night.

"I said 'no' you aren't going to take any of those people hostage, and no you can't hurt them, we have enough to worry about."

"But Mr. Boom-Boom hasn't been used all night!" I whine helplessly knowin' this argument I had lost.

Chris took my gun and my bag of tricks makin' sure my focus was on him as he relayed his plan. "There's a storage shed off near the water side, it's big and spacious. They'll follow us in when we go in-"

"And what do we do after that? If you haven't noticed they are packin' more firepower than a fireworks factory. We go in there and we're easy pickin's."

Again Chris smiled that delicious smile I wish was edible. Mmm, that reminds me I need to stock up on candy lips.

When my Red comes up with an idea, oh does he come up with an idea! Now keep in mind he's still a lil' tipsy from that weed killer attack but oh he gives his all. He went into the main building stole a portable CD player from the janitor when he was cleaning out the bathrooms, brought back to yours truly who hooked it up to the heavy machinery storage build's PA system (after a bit of rewiring which stopped video feed to the security). Ooh it pays to be multitalented.

Standing back we observed our handy work. "Nice." He said to himself. "Harl, go lure them in."

Clicking my heels together I saluted, "Yes sir!" And with a hop and a skip I was gone before he realized he didn't tell me exactly how I was or wasn't s'pose to lure our buddies.

Rushing outside I uselessly tiptoed out into the open announcing my arrival with a, "Sneaky sneaky." It looked empty outside the storage house but I wasn't some dumb broad, I only acted that way. "Ok ya jerks, playtime!" Pointing my flag gun above my head I fired.

The flag-like projectile whistled into the air seconds before it exploded high above our heads releasing a bright white light that banished all of the darkness.

"Ah-ha! Found ya!" I cried pointing to our stalkers hidden in the shadows; I might have actually missed them if it hadn't been for their poor fashion sense for camouflage. Turning around I shook my booty taunting them, "Na na-na na-na ya can't catch me!" With a smack to my own ass I ran back inside.

The guys walked into the dark storage place and tried to turn on some light. They should have known better. "I saw her run in here. But I can't see a thing."

"I told you we should have got those night vision goggles instead of the Tanker."

"Like hell you did, you were the main one voting we buy that damn van."

"Shut up the both of you. Cannon, fire another one of those weed killer bombs."

From behind a forklift Chris and I spied on the group, with a nod of his head Operation Boppy was go! (Can you tell I named it myself?)

In the dark an old jazzy song, Temptation I think, began to play over the old speakers. "What the hell is that noise?" Ouch, well that hurt, *sigh* people today just don't know good music.

"Spread out!" The lead man said waving his arm as he still crept around with his gun aimed. The good little mice played into our trap, they all looked like they had been influenced by some military based vid game. I mean the guns, the bombs, camouflage, and the gas masks? And they have the nerve to say that I'm crazy!

As the weed killer misty stuff began to fill the room and a little solider wannabe boy was lacking behind as he searched. His looking was rewarded when a bra fell at his combat boots.

"Uh?" He asked looking up as I slowly made myself known by stepping out from behind the forklift…heehee topless.

Making a come-hither motion with my hands I giggled knowing if the idiot wasn't wearing the mask his jaw would have hit the floor. He hesitated; I couldn't believe he was hesitating when a good pair of knockers was right in his face, what did I have to jiggle them for him? Disappearing behind the lift again he followed me without even alerting his friends.

Boing! Boff! The spring punching glove bounded beautifully off his chest knocking him off his feet and into the metal lift knocking the fool unconscious. "I love my toys." I smiled pulled off his gasmask and just to be sure used one of my stockings to tie him up before heading back to Chris.

"Happy birthday." I smiled handing it to him. He took it without as much as a 'thank you' and tossed my top back to me, the punk really had a nerve to be pissed at a time like this! Oh well, we had work to do and asses to kick.

Alright with the problem of Red and the weed killer out of the way all I had to worry about was the other three.

"Give me your other stock." Chris breathed to me in a very Darth Vader way. For that reason alone I complied. "Alright I'll take one you get the other."

"Aye aye captain." I sighed jumping on top of a go-cart and springing across one heavy lifting machine onto the other until I had found my next victim in the maze of machinery searching us out.

From behind us someplace there was a loud shout of surprise and a gun shot followed by a thud. "Henry? Henry are you okay?" My target asked turning just as I jumped down with a flying kick!

"He-" His shouts were muffled as I stuffed my….um something in his mouth.

"We don't want ya spoilin' the surprise, honey bunny." I cooed ramming my knee into his stomach.

After knocking our guys out or whatever we did to silence them we met again in the center of the large mechanical maze.

"Three down," I whispered.

"One to go." Chris said.

"This is the ringleader, he's gonna be harder than the three stooges back there." I stated letting my mind actually reason out the possibilities.

"We need some fire power to match his…Harl do you-"

"No no and no! You come up wit' somethin' this time cause I'm tired of givin' everything!" I hissed crossing my arms over my chest giving him my I'm-pissed-off look, a rare sight in my book. "My bra is lost someplace, my stockings are being used as handcuffs, my panties are gaggin' some guy, and I'm feelin' a breeze in places the air hasn't hit since I was born! I ain't handin' over another thing!" I said counting off my losses with my fingers.

One thing about being in an argument and being in an argument with me of all people is that you tend to forget the important things around you. Like the insane gun totting nut cases out to collect on our heads. "Alright you two put your damn hands over your f-cking heads and don't move!" The last man standing commanded shoving the gun in our faces.

Both Chris and I lifted our hands into the air. "Ooh someone needed to have his mouth washed." I hissed.

"Yeah, don't you know it's not polite to say such things in front of a lady?" The poor sap wasn't aware that even without use of our hands we were just as dangerous, heck my greatest strength is in my legs.

"Her, a lady? That's rich." Last man standing said.

I shrugged, "Lady in public a freak at home, though I do tend to mix those up. Right baby?" I asked directing the attention to Chris. He merely smirked before dropping his hands punching our gunman. With the fool crying out in pain like a lil' pansy I dropped in a low spinning kick knocking him off his feet.

Red nicely kicked the gun far away from his reach as we both looked down upon him wondering what to do.

"Compost?" I asked.

"No, I have enough. You deal with him." He said moving away to leave me to my work as I leered down with a huge grin on my face at the frighten man at my feet.

Heehee, I bet you're wondering what I did to the guy right? Well….

"Uncle!" The bounty hunter cried as a sheen of sweat glistened across his face.

"I can't hear you!" I shouted pulling his underwear even harder. It's so nice to see someone get up close and personal with their underpants. "Say it louder!" The wedgie had moved from simple to super, two more level to go before it reached atomic.

"Aiie, uncle uncle UNCLE!"

"Good boy." I laughed. Now I could have just dropped his sorry behind to the ground. But what fun is that? With a hard yank the band rose higher and higher until the ultimate level of wedgie-dom was achieved. The waist band reached over his head completing the atomic with a loud snap against his forehead!

Haha! That's when I dropped kicked his ass into the corner.

My well practiced evil chortle was sadly cut short as Chris came back, "Are you done yet? I want to get home and check on my ferns."

Damn ferns, I hated those stupid plants most of all. We walked along the reservoir's sewage line the stench not brothering us much since we were still in the midst of our fight.

"Well if you hadn't been so beef headed this wouldn't have happened!"

"If you hadn't drug me out to that damn club-"

"If you would have just been honest and actually said you didn't want to do anything today-"

"If you would have just left me alone-"

The sound of a gun cocking made us stop for the umpteenth time that night, "I hate to get in the middle of a lover's quarrel but I must ask that the two of you come with me." Another of the bounty hunters said with nice little British accent stated that reminding me I had to call Loup when I got home.

"I thought you said there were four?" Chris looked towards me the both of us ignoring the man as he came closer to us.

Rollin' my eyes I shifted my weight, "Well sor-ry but at the time I was tryin' not to get my ass blown off! Anyone would have miscounted!"

"Will the two of your just shut the bloody hell up?!" The lead bounty man shouted right into our ears.

I looked towards red and he looked towards me. With a silent agreement our hands balled into fists and together we punched the snit out of the fool. The power behind our blows sent the man reeling back over in the rushing waters of the funky water.

We didn't even wait for him to surface, we didn't even care. Tired for the day and perhaps the entire week Chris made a jerking motion with his thumb, "Let's go home before Batman shows up or something."

Back at our house, the old firehouse, we were still a bit riled up at each other. The negative vibes sent my baby Erik to crouch in his private corner the second I scratched his head. Givin' up I sat down on the couch to watch the late late night B horror movie hoping the senseless plot full of holes and poor endings would calm me down.

The light in the kitchen died as Chris made his way towards me with a container in his hand. Sittin' down beside me he handed me a spoon. Openin' the cookies and cream ice cream we sat in silence watching the interrupting news report of our wrong doings.

I can't believe it! He ruins my night out by stupidly exposin' us in public and getting' us chased all 'round Gotham and losin' over half of the clothes I was wearin' for the night! And he thinks that I was gonna forgive him because he brings in a pint of my favorite ice cream?!

Taking a spoonful of the creamy concoction into my mouth I instantly unwind as I leaned against him. Damn, he knows me well.

Ahh, how I love the guy!