When they arrived back at the loft, they swing open the door in fits of
laughter. Carrying two bags full of Justin's belongings. They walked into
Brian's bedroom and set the stuff down on the bed. They stepped out of the
room and into the kitchen. Brian poured two glasses of wine. They sat,
comfortably in the living room couch. Brian glanced at the clock, it was
11:43. Almost forty-five minutes past his normal sleeping schedule. He just
shrugged it off and turned his attention back over to Justin. The blonde
was talking about some of the galleries his art had been featured in. Brian
was actually intrigued by what Justin had to say. Justin had grown up a lot
since he had been here last. Brian understood Justin a lot more, now that
he had matured a lot more. Had more experiences. Brian just let Justin
talk. Let himself get lost in his words. Brian found himself staring
lovingly at Justin. Looking at his blonde hair, his fair skin, and his pink
lips. Justin look notice of Brian and stopped talking. He looked back at
Brian. Wondering what Brian was thinking. Brian smiled, but only barely.
"Let's go to bed..." Brian said with a smile. Brian said sweetly and low, Justin looked a little shocked. Justin's smile started to fade slowly and he set his wine glass on the living room table. He stood up and walked toward the center of the room, closer to the bedroom. He began to run his hands through his hair and nervously rub his hands on his jeans. Brian looked concerned, watching Justin shift around. Not making eye contact with him.
"I don't know Brian...don't you think it's a little much?" Justin had concern in his voice. Brian's eyebrows furrowed and his mouth fell open. Justin swallowed hard as his eyes shifted to and fro, but never into Brian's eyes.
"What are you talking about?" Brian asked, he truly didn't understand Justin's sudden worry. Brian set down his glass and stood up. He walked silently over to where Justin was standing. Justin looked up at Brian with weary eyes.
"I...I don't want to have sex with you..." Justin said quietly, rubbing his arm in nervousness. Brian stood just in front of Justin. Justin was looking at him now, waiting for how he would react.
"You think I would do that?" Brian whispered as he pushed a strand of hair out of Justin's eyes. Justin looked straight into his eyes and Brian saw that there was a hint of fear in them. Justin had always had a fear of what Brian could do to him. Mostly because of the age difference. Brian began to tear up at the thought of Justin being afraid of him and he fell into Justin. Giving him a huge hug. Justin squeezed him tight, feeling comfort in his old lover's arms. Justin also started to cry, feeling his shield fall and break to pieces the second he fell into Brian's arms.
"I'm so sorry, Justin..." Brian sobbed into Justin's shoulder. Brian felt like he let Justin down by having a disease that he couldn't get rid of.
"I'd do anything to be with you again..." Brian cried out. Justin just held him as they both cried together, in the middle of Brian's living room. Justin shut his eyes hard and tears fell from them. Hot tears burned his cheeks.
"You are with me..." Justin said as he looked into Brian's hazel eyes. Brian's face was stained with tears and his nose was running. He sniffled once, loudly. Justin gave him a smile to try and cheer him up. Justin looked at Brian with a fiery intensity. He leaned in and gave Brian a small kiss on his lips. Brian suddenly remembered what it was like to kiss Justin. He tried to savor it.
"Come on, you need some sleep..." Justin said. Himself and Brian walked into Brian's bedroom. Brian took off his pants and shirt. He climbed into bed and pulled the covers over him. Only clad in his thin cotton boxers. Justin only took off his nice trousers and dress shirt, so he slept in his white undershirt and boxers. He climbed into bed and pulled the comforter over him.
Minutes later, Brian turned on his side and threw his hands over Justin's waist and fell into a comfortable position. One he remembered all too well. Justin began to fell safe again, being in Brian's arms. Justin turned on his other side, so they were lying face to face with each other. Justin looked at Brian, who had his eyes closed and was looking content and happy. Justin smiled to himself. Justin sat for some time, watching Brian sleep.
"Brian?" Justin asked quietly, when Brian made no movement, Justin said it again.
"What?" Brian asked, his voice muffled from tiredness. But he answered nonetheless.
"Are you asleep?" Justin asked in a tone barely above a whisper. Brian shifted a little in his position.
"Not yet..." Justin smiled as he snuggled into Brian's neck. Brian fell asleep first Justin just lay in Brian's arms, staring up at the wall. His mind started to wander. He thought of his relationship with Brian when they were both younger. Justin knew nothing; he was so young and naive. With the way Brian was, in his late twenties, the drugs, the clubbing, taking a different person every night. He remembered how somehow, Justin always used to end up at Brian's loft in the middle of the night, back in Brian's bed. He remembered how much Brian had cried the night Justin got bashed. Brian was there every night in the hospital. Justin remembered how much time they used to spend together. Justin almost started to cry, but he was too exhausted to waist any more energy on tears. He closed his eyes and fell asleep with his arms around Brian's waist.
"Let's go to bed..." Brian said with a smile. Brian said sweetly and low, Justin looked a little shocked. Justin's smile started to fade slowly and he set his wine glass on the living room table. He stood up and walked toward the center of the room, closer to the bedroom. He began to run his hands through his hair and nervously rub his hands on his jeans. Brian looked concerned, watching Justin shift around. Not making eye contact with him.
"I don't know Brian...don't you think it's a little much?" Justin had concern in his voice. Brian's eyebrows furrowed and his mouth fell open. Justin swallowed hard as his eyes shifted to and fro, but never into Brian's eyes.
"What are you talking about?" Brian asked, he truly didn't understand Justin's sudden worry. Brian set down his glass and stood up. He walked silently over to where Justin was standing. Justin looked up at Brian with weary eyes.
"I...I don't want to have sex with you..." Justin said quietly, rubbing his arm in nervousness. Brian stood just in front of Justin. Justin was looking at him now, waiting for how he would react.
"You think I would do that?" Brian whispered as he pushed a strand of hair out of Justin's eyes. Justin looked straight into his eyes and Brian saw that there was a hint of fear in them. Justin had always had a fear of what Brian could do to him. Mostly because of the age difference. Brian began to tear up at the thought of Justin being afraid of him and he fell into Justin. Giving him a huge hug. Justin squeezed him tight, feeling comfort in his old lover's arms. Justin also started to cry, feeling his shield fall and break to pieces the second he fell into Brian's arms.
"I'm so sorry, Justin..." Brian sobbed into Justin's shoulder. Brian felt like he let Justin down by having a disease that he couldn't get rid of.
"I'd do anything to be with you again..." Brian cried out. Justin just held him as they both cried together, in the middle of Brian's living room. Justin shut his eyes hard and tears fell from them. Hot tears burned his cheeks.
"You are with me..." Justin said as he looked into Brian's hazel eyes. Brian's face was stained with tears and his nose was running. He sniffled once, loudly. Justin gave him a smile to try and cheer him up. Justin looked at Brian with a fiery intensity. He leaned in and gave Brian a small kiss on his lips. Brian suddenly remembered what it was like to kiss Justin. He tried to savor it.
"Come on, you need some sleep..." Justin said. Himself and Brian walked into Brian's bedroom. Brian took off his pants and shirt. He climbed into bed and pulled the covers over him. Only clad in his thin cotton boxers. Justin only took off his nice trousers and dress shirt, so he slept in his white undershirt and boxers. He climbed into bed and pulled the comforter over him.
Minutes later, Brian turned on his side and threw his hands over Justin's waist and fell into a comfortable position. One he remembered all too well. Justin began to fell safe again, being in Brian's arms. Justin turned on his other side, so they were lying face to face with each other. Justin looked at Brian, who had his eyes closed and was looking content and happy. Justin smiled to himself. Justin sat for some time, watching Brian sleep.
"Brian?" Justin asked quietly, when Brian made no movement, Justin said it again.
"What?" Brian asked, his voice muffled from tiredness. But he answered nonetheless.
"Are you asleep?" Justin asked in a tone barely above a whisper. Brian shifted a little in his position.
"Not yet..." Justin smiled as he snuggled into Brian's neck. Brian fell asleep first Justin just lay in Brian's arms, staring up at the wall. His mind started to wander. He thought of his relationship with Brian when they were both younger. Justin knew nothing; he was so young and naive. With the way Brian was, in his late twenties, the drugs, the clubbing, taking a different person every night. He remembered how somehow, Justin always used to end up at Brian's loft in the middle of the night, back in Brian's bed. He remembered how much Brian had cried the night Justin got bashed. Brian was there every night in the hospital. Justin remembered how much time they used to spend together. Justin almost started to cry, but he was too exhausted to waist any more energy on tears. He closed his eyes and fell asleep with his arms around Brian's waist.