Disclaimer: I don't own FOP! The characters belong to Butch Hartman, I'm just borrowing them for a fun non profit story.
Enjoy! Please R&R!
What's A Wanda?
Chapter 2 - Flying, Magic and Wanda's Big Butt
[Wanda is still sitting on the floor looking extremely confused. She's looking at her clothes and studying Timmy and Cosmo]
Timmy: Cut it out, Wanda! Stop pretending!
Wanda: Who's Wanda?!
Timmy: YOU ARE!
Wanda: I am, are you sure?
Cosmo: Yes! You're Wanda!
Wanda: And you are....?
Cosmo: COSMO! We've only been married 10,000 YEARS!
Wanda: (confused) We have? Are you sure?
Cosmo: (thinks) I hope I'm sure. I think it was you who said I do. If not, there's been another Wanda waiting at the altar for me for 10, 000 years...
Wanda: I don't remember! I don't remember anything!
Timmy: Oh no! Cosmo, we didn't just erase Wanda's memory from 10 minutes ago, we erased the whole thing.
Wanda: Wait, I'm Wanda you say? Then that means you two erased MY memory?
Timmy: Umm...yes. It was him! [points at Cosmo]
Wanda: [to Cosmo] And when we married, I actually WANTED to marry an idiot?
Cosmo: I'm told I can be very charming. [belches]
Wanda: (deadpan) Are you sure charming was the word you were looking for?
Cosmo: (near tears) Timmy! She's insulting me, but it's not in usual way! SHE MEANS IT! We gotta get her memory back! She doesn't love me anymore!!!
Timmy: Right, I wish Wanda had her memory back!
[Cosmo waves his wand. There's a poof of smoke.]
Wanda: Ummm. Am I supposed to be different? Where are we, anyway? [looks around Timmy's room]
Timmy: Cosmo! It didn't work, what happened?!
Cosmo: I'm sorry Timmy! This wish requires a lot of power, I need Wanda's help! It's easy to erase memory, but not quite so easy to get it back! (thinks) Oopsie! I remember that now!
Timmy: COSMO! You...You...Oh nevermind. We're just going to have to try and get Wanda to remember who she is!
Cosmo: (determined) Right!
[They look over to Wanda who's fiddling with her wand and crown]
Wanda: Hey look! I have wands and wings! And floaty crowny things! What am I? Some kinda fairy!?
[She laughs at the idea, then realises no-one else is laughing with her. Cosmo and Timmy avoid eye contact.]
Wanda: Oh dear, I AM a fairy, aren't I?
[Timmy and Cosmo nod.]
Wanda: Wow....this is so weird. I can't believe this...but I have to, there's nothing else to believe! Does this mean I can fly, like you? Cosbone, is it?
Cosmo: Cosmo. Say it with me. COS-MO. And yes, you can fly. Try it.
[Wanda concentrates as hard as she can, flutters her wings up to Cosmo's height. She does messy little flips and somersaults as she goes.]
Wanda: (excited) Hey! I'M FLYING! I'M FLYING! I'm a natural...
Cosmo: Well it's not your first time!
[Timmy looks surprised at how easily Wanda picked up flying.]
Timmy: Hey, This might be easier than we thought!
[Wanda's wings suddenly stop.]
Wanda: Ahh! I'M CRASHING! I'M CRASHING!
Timmy: I withdraw my last statement!
[Wanda soars to the ground but luckily Cosmo poofs out a large cushion, which she neatly lands on. Wanda looks up smiles warmly at him.]
Wanda: Hey, I think I'm beginning to see why I married you! Costoe!
Cosmo: Cosmo. but yeah! I told you I was charming! (proudly) I even made it a real squishy one to protect your big butt!
[Wanda narrows her eyes. Timmy slaps his head in frustration.]
Wanda: I withdraw my last statement!
Cosmo: What? What did I say? Honesty is the best policy!
Wanda: So, I'm a fairy. Does this mean I do magic and stuff?
Timmy: Yep. Just wave that wand!
Wanda: Hmmm. Well what shall I do with it? I'll start small.
[She looks around the room to find something to try her magic out on]
Wanda: [looks at Timmy] Maybe I can turn that silly pink hat into a more masculine blue colour!
Timmy: (annoyed) It's not silly! How come she forgot everything but her favourite insults??!
[Wanda concentrates and waves her wand. The hat doesn't turn blue, but into a large shoe. It smacks into Timmy's head.]
Timmy: Oww! Careful! I might lose my memory too!
Cosmo: Well nearly right, shoe RHYMES with blue.
Wanda: Oh dear! I'm not a very good fairy! Maybe I should stick to regular human stuff before I try that again!
[She gets to her feet, takes a few steps, then wobbles and slips up. She tries again, but her legs fail under her body like a baby taking it's first few steps. Finally she gives up.]
Wanda: I don't understand! Why can't I walk?!
Cosmo: You're a fairy. Fairies never walk.
[Wanda's bottom lip quivers. She bursts into tears.]
Timmy: Wanda! Don't cry!
Wanda: (through tears) Why shouldn't I?! I suck at being a fairy, I can't fly, I can't do magic....I can't even walk like real people! And I have a faint smell of smoothie on my clothes and I don't know why! I DON'T KNOW ANYTHING AT ALL!
Cosmo: Don't worry! Not knowing anything is a life of ignorance and bliss! It's great!
[Cosmo goes to hug her, she swats him away. He looks hurt.]
Wanda: Sorry, it's just I don't know you.
Timmy: But you do!
Wanda: No I don't! I feel so empty! AND I'M MARRIED TO AN IDIOT! WITH GREEN HAIR! [cries again]
Cosmo: (annoyed) Hey! YOU have pink hair!
Wanda: [stops crying] I do?
[She pulls down a strand of her and studies it]
Wanda: Oh no! I DO! [cries harder] I hate this!
Cosmo: Don't hate it! Pink hair is actually quite 'hip' these days.
[Cosmo lifts Wanda up the shoulders they both float upwards. He holds her in place.]
Wanda: It's not the hair...well the hair is a small part of it....It's just...I don't know anything about me! Who am I?
Cosmo: You're Wanda!
Timmy: Don't worry Wanda, we'll help you get your memory back.
Cosmo: Yeah! We'll remind you of all the fairy things you do!
[Cosmo gently lets go of Wanda. She hovers neatly next to him above Timmy. Cosmo smiles, pleased with himself.]
Wanda: (deadpan) Great! No need to panic, Dumb and Dumber are on the case!
Cosmo: [quietly to Timmy] You should've wished she had forgotten to be mean.
Wanda: I heard that!
Timmy: I should've wished she forgot how to use her excellent hearing!
Wanda: [to Timmy, curiously] Who are you, anyway?
Timmy: Well Wanda. I'll try and explain....
[Wanda suddenly loses her balance and drops from the air, crashing onto Timmy. He lies under her, slightly dazed.]
Wanda: Hmmm. Maybe I DO have a big butt.
.....
Enjoy! Please R&R!
What's A Wanda?
Chapter 2 - Flying, Magic and Wanda's Big Butt
[Wanda is still sitting on the floor looking extremely confused. She's looking at her clothes and studying Timmy and Cosmo]
Timmy: Cut it out, Wanda! Stop pretending!
Wanda: Who's Wanda?!
Timmy: YOU ARE!
Wanda: I am, are you sure?
Cosmo: Yes! You're Wanda!
Wanda: And you are....?
Cosmo: COSMO! We've only been married 10,000 YEARS!
Wanda: (confused) We have? Are you sure?
Cosmo: (thinks) I hope I'm sure. I think it was you who said I do. If not, there's been another Wanda waiting at the altar for me for 10, 000 years...
Wanda: I don't remember! I don't remember anything!
Timmy: Oh no! Cosmo, we didn't just erase Wanda's memory from 10 minutes ago, we erased the whole thing.
Wanda: Wait, I'm Wanda you say? Then that means you two erased MY memory?
Timmy: Umm...yes. It was him! [points at Cosmo]
Wanda: [to Cosmo] And when we married, I actually WANTED to marry an idiot?
Cosmo: I'm told I can be very charming. [belches]
Wanda: (deadpan) Are you sure charming was the word you were looking for?
Cosmo: (near tears) Timmy! She's insulting me, but it's not in usual way! SHE MEANS IT! We gotta get her memory back! She doesn't love me anymore!!!
Timmy: Right, I wish Wanda had her memory back!
[Cosmo waves his wand. There's a poof of smoke.]
Wanda: Ummm. Am I supposed to be different? Where are we, anyway? [looks around Timmy's room]
Timmy: Cosmo! It didn't work, what happened?!
Cosmo: I'm sorry Timmy! This wish requires a lot of power, I need Wanda's help! It's easy to erase memory, but not quite so easy to get it back! (thinks) Oopsie! I remember that now!
Timmy: COSMO! You...You...Oh nevermind. We're just going to have to try and get Wanda to remember who she is!
Cosmo: (determined) Right!
[They look over to Wanda who's fiddling with her wand and crown]
Wanda: Hey look! I have wands and wings! And floaty crowny things! What am I? Some kinda fairy!?
[She laughs at the idea, then realises no-one else is laughing with her. Cosmo and Timmy avoid eye contact.]
Wanda: Oh dear, I AM a fairy, aren't I?
[Timmy and Cosmo nod.]
Wanda: Wow....this is so weird. I can't believe this...but I have to, there's nothing else to believe! Does this mean I can fly, like you? Cosbone, is it?
Cosmo: Cosmo. Say it with me. COS-MO. And yes, you can fly. Try it.
[Wanda concentrates as hard as she can, flutters her wings up to Cosmo's height. She does messy little flips and somersaults as she goes.]
Wanda: (excited) Hey! I'M FLYING! I'M FLYING! I'm a natural...
Cosmo: Well it's not your first time!
[Timmy looks surprised at how easily Wanda picked up flying.]
Timmy: Hey, This might be easier than we thought!
[Wanda's wings suddenly stop.]
Wanda: Ahh! I'M CRASHING! I'M CRASHING!
Timmy: I withdraw my last statement!
[Wanda soars to the ground but luckily Cosmo poofs out a large cushion, which she neatly lands on. Wanda looks up smiles warmly at him.]
Wanda: Hey, I think I'm beginning to see why I married you! Costoe!
Cosmo: Cosmo. but yeah! I told you I was charming! (proudly) I even made it a real squishy one to protect your big butt!
[Wanda narrows her eyes. Timmy slaps his head in frustration.]
Wanda: I withdraw my last statement!
Cosmo: What? What did I say? Honesty is the best policy!
Wanda: So, I'm a fairy. Does this mean I do magic and stuff?
Timmy: Yep. Just wave that wand!
Wanda: Hmmm. Well what shall I do with it? I'll start small.
[She looks around the room to find something to try her magic out on]
Wanda: [looks at Timmy] Maybe I can turn that silly pink hat into a more masculine blue colour!
Timmy: (annoyed) It's not silly! How come she forgot everything but her favourite insults??!
[Wanda concentrates and waves her wand. The hat doesn't turn blue, but into a large shoe. It smacks into Timmy's head.]
Timmy: Oww! Careful! I might lose my memory too!
Cosmo: Well nearly right, shoe RHYMES with blue.
Wanda: Oh dear! I'm not a very good fairy! Maybe I should stick to regular human stuff before I try that again!
[She gets to her feet, takes a few steps, then wobbles and slips up. She tries again, but her legs fail under her body like a baby taking it's first few steps. Finally she gives up.]
Wanda: I don't understand! Why can't I walk?!
Cosmo: You're a fairy. Fairies never walk.
[Wanda's bottom lip quivers. She bursts into tears.]
Timmy: Wanda! Don't cry!
Wanda: (through tears) Why shouldn't I?! I suck at being a fairy, I can't fly, I can't do magic....I can't even walk like real people! And I have a faint smell of smoothie on my clothes and I don't know why! I DON'T KNOW ANYTHING AT ALL!
Cosmo: Don't worry! Not knowing anything is a life of ignorance and bliss! It's great!
[Cosmo goes to hug her, she swats him away. He looks hurt.]
Wanda: Sorry, it's just I don't know you.
Timmy: But you do!
Wanda: No I don't! I feel so empty! AND I'M MARRIED TO AN IDIOT! WITH GREEN HAIR! [cries again]
Cosmo: (annoyed) Hey! YOU have pink hair!
Wanda: [stops crying] I do?
[She pulls down a strand of her and studies it]
Wanda: Oh no! I DO! [cries harder] I hate this!
Cosmo: Don't hate it! Pink hair is actually quite 'hip' these days.
[Cosmo lifts Wanda up the shoulders they both float upwards. He holds her in place.]
Wanda: It's not the hair...well the hair is a small part of it....It's just...I don't know anything about me! Who am I?
Cosmo: You're Wanda!
Timmy: Don't worry Wanda, we'll help you get your memory back.
Cosmo: Yeah! We'll remind you of all the fairy things you do!
[Cosmo gently lets go of Wanda. She hovers neatly next to him above Timmy. Cosmo smiles, pleased with himself.]
Wanda: (deadpan) Great! No need to panic, Dumb and Dumber are on the case!
Cosmo: [quietly to Timmy] You should've wished she had forgotten to be mean.
Wanda: I heard that!
Timmy: I should've wished she forgot how to use her excellent hearing!
Wanda: [to Timmy, curiously] Who are you, anyway?
Timmy: Well Wanda. I'll try and explain....
[Wanda suddenly loses her balance and drops from the air, crashing onto Timmy. He lies under her, slightly dazed.]
Wanda: Hmmm. Maybe I DO have a big butt.
.....