Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: I do not own anything.
Note: Well, everyone I'm back from spring break. Let's just say that meeting Adam Brody was so much better than I could have imagined. He's so terribly good looking. But I guess you all already knew that. Read the LJ if you want to know how the Paley festival went. Well, hopefully if my computer does not break, I will have another chapter up fairly quickly, but for now, enjoy…
One
Chapter 12: turn around and see me cry
February 2013
She was packing, getting ready to make the trip home for the engagement party. The TV was on full blast as she threw assorted designer dresses into the suitcases. She should have never turned on the TV. One Marino Way. That was his show. His name flashed across the screen under the heading Creator and Executive Producer. And she had known this from the countless articles she had read about the show and its success. What she didn't know was how much it hurt to see his name. It stung…
Within minutes, she picked up the plot and characters--it was a teen drama, not rocket science. There was a nerd type guy, Sam, who was in love with the school's reigning bitch, Jamie. Summer could've been the actress's older twin sister. And of course Sam wasn't getting the girl. Couplings like that were never meant to be.
She was hurt and shocked at the same time. With her eyes glued to the TV, she could not stop herself from watching her life re-lived on the screen. The scene played just as it had happened in real time.
***
August 2004
She rode up the escalator, letting the tears freely fall, not caring who saw her. Fuck them. She would never have to live up to any of their expectations ever again. The taste of the bitter tears surprised her; she hadn't tasted their saltiness in a long time. 8:40 flight to RDU airport. She was leaving this place for good, off to start her new life at Duke. No one would know her. She could start over and be whoever she wanted to be. She could change. She would change.
Summer would never make mistakes in love again. She vowed to never let anyone affect her as much as he did. The worst thing was, she knew it was her fault, but her pride stood in the way of happiness. She had hurt him and he had rejected her. She knew she was running away from her problems, but felt that it was the only option at this point. She could not take Orange County anymore. She needed to forget. And she would. Not today, and not tomorrow, but one day she would forget.
No more crying. Crying is for the weak and the vulnerable. She would be vulnerable no more.
He watched her as she rode up the escalator. He wanted to stop her. He wanted to run to her and kiss her and tell her that he forgave her. But he didn't. He would not allow her that honor. He knew this was the right thing for both of them. He was tired of her games, of her excuses, of her behavior towards him. Most of all he was just tired. He wondered if he would ever see her again, because he would probably never be rid of this heavy burden in his heart. It was her fault that he would probably never love anyone ever again. If he did see her, it would be too soon, whenever it were to happen.
"So long, sweet Summer," he whispered as he watched her figure fade from view. A few tears fell from his eyes as he walked out of her life like she had walked out of his.
How can I just let you walk away
Just let you leave without a trace
When I stand here taking every breath with you
You're the only one who really knew me at all
How can you just walk away from me
When all I can do is watch you leave
'Cause we shared the laughter and the pain
And even shared the tears
You're the only one who really knew me at all
So take a look at me now
There's just an empty space
There's nothing left here to remind me
Just the memory of your face
Take a good look at me now
There's just an empty space
And you coming back to me
Is against all the odds
And that's what I got to take
I wish I could just make you turn around
Turn around and see me cry
There's so much I need to say to you
So many reasons why
You're the only one
Who really knew me at all
But to wait for you is all I can do
And that's what I've got to face
Take a good look at me now
'Cause I'll still be standing there
***
February 2013
Jamie heard Sam calling her name through the terminal. At first she ignored him because she didn't want him to see her in the vulnerable state she was in. But soon, her heart caved in. She turned, looking for his hopeful face through the crowd. Spotting him, she ran back towards the ticket counter and hugged him, long and hard. She wanted to remember this moment forever.
"I forgive you Jamie. I want to be with you." He smiled, and she and about all the women ages 18-49 who watched the show melted. "I forgive you," he whispered.
She kissed him, letting all of her inhibitions go. Typical, the boy always got the girl on TV.
She broke the kiss and her disposition changed.
"I can't be with you Sam. I don't want to hurt you in the way I know I can. You don't deserve someone like me. This is not the way it's meant to be."
Silent tears threatened to fall from his eyes. He was not going to give her the pleasure of seeing him break down. She wanted that to happen. This was her game. But he would beat her at it. "You said you loved me and that was a lie. Well, let me make something clear to you Jamie. I won't wait for you. I'm not going to be your sick little puppy dog that's going to follow you around for the rest of your life. I'm not going to be your rock."
She stared at him blankly as his words registered in her mind. Her eyes welled up with tears that could not fall. Not here. Not now.
"And you know what Jamie? You're right, I don't deserve a bitch like you. I'm sick of your games and I'm sick of you. Goodbye."
He left her there, broken. More tears fell, and they kept falling. She watched him turn around and look at her with sadness emanating from his face. She saw a glimmer of hope in his eyes, a spark that told her that there was some hope. Some hope for when she saw him again at the end of winter break. "I'll see you," she whispered to no one in particular. The screen faded to black as some sappy song played out.
Summer could not avert her gaze from the screen. So he had been there with her when she left. He had watched her leave. He had written it into the show. He had written them. Their story. She came to the stark realization that he would not wait for her. He would not be there. And for the first time in many years, Summer Roberts let down her barrier and cried. She cried the tears of regret, the tears of sadness, and the tears of pain.
She just cried.
Against All Odds by Phil Collins